Rude or Typical?

[Julian]

So I'm new to this very addictive & informative site -- and I have a question:

People will randomly come up to me and grab my hand. Some of those "admirers" are complete strangers.

I'm a friendly person so it doesn't bother me except -- almost ALL of the admirers bring my hand CLOSE to their faces and inspect my diamond.

Then they all turn it to the side to peer through it!

I'll admit, my ring is stunning. But what are they looking for? Inclusions? They won't find any without a powerful lens and it's colorless -- so why do they do this? Do they think it's fake????

Even people I know who come up to congratulate me do this. Does this happen to you, too?

I'd never do that unless invited to -- usually I just congratulate and be happy for the person. I'd never, ever grab their hand and inspect their ring! I'm surprised no one's pulled out a loupe!

 

[msbennie]

Dont' know why people do that but could you post a picture on this site so we can see it too?

 

[ame]

Where are the photos?!! Must see photos!!!

Welcome. ITs very addicting and really makes you wanna go out and spend more money.

I can relate to your story. Its really kind of irritating. I carry a loupe in my purse (for my own sanity...or insanity) and there have been occasions where Ive wanted to say "hey youd get a better look at it with this loupe". Usually that does it. Its fun to be congratulated but to have them freaking out and examining it for flaws just drives me fruit.

 

[reena]

yeah i agree, that sounds pretty rude.

that being said: CAN you post a picture?

now i know what you may be thinking, but it's not the same thing--we just want to admire it and give you compliments!

 

[finerthings]

Well, my opinion is they are being "somewhat" rude, but I must say in their defense that your 3ct stone must be breathtaking! You must understand that not everyone will witness a 3ct stone in their lifetime. Enjoy and congrats!

 

[Julian]

Thanks all!

I will post a pic as soon as the fiancé gets the hang of photographing my ring!

It's not rude AT ALL for you fine people to ask to see the ring -- it IS a diamond board, after all!

I'd want to see it, too! I love looking at diamonds!

This is our hobby!

(And our obsession!) LOL.

I promise to post them as soon as I can!

So people DO come up and examine your rings? It's nice for enthusiasts like us to examine it, but it's just odd for people I don't know to bring my hand up to their eyeballs and then turn my hand sideways for them to peer through the diamond. They look crosseyed, they're squinting so hard! Heh heh heh.

I guess I just want to know why they do it -- is it because they're hunting for imaginary flaws or are they just trying to breathe all over my hand?

Oh well, maybe I just need to relax!!!!!

 

[MelissaSue]

i personally think that people are just admiring!! I would never do that.. I'm much too shy.. but I would not be offended! I'd take it as a compliment!

Melissa

 

[Julian]

Awww, you're probably right! I love your positive outlook!

I may just be sensitive to all the constant examining I guess!

The ones who look closely and oooh and ahhh are really nice!

But the skeptical ones who peer with a totally serious appraisal-type expression kind of make me want to take back possession of my hand!

The ring is really special to me and I feel like they're appraising it like one does to cattle or something. LOL. Diamonds may be somewhat of a commodity, but each one is special and unique!!!!

What's up with the strangers who grab your hand without an invitation and peer, turning your hand this way and that? Eeek!

 

[sevens one]

First of all you must remember that WE found a place to feed our obsession. There are still many, many lost souls out there wandering the planet with no place to go.

I do think it's rude for strangers though.
But you must have one hell of a hunker for a complete stranger to grab your hand!

Oh yeah, don't forget side view pics!

 

[Momoftwo]

Not to get you off topic, but wait til you're pregnant and total strangers (especially elderly women) touch your stomach. Believe me, it happens, and my kids are in college now, but I've experienced it and seen it. I think it's just curiousity and interest over these life changing events, plus today, engagement rings are so much bigger and diverse than they used to be. People admire anything new and some just can't help touching. I also think it's somewhat rude, but the choice is to be rude back or polite and move on. And, I know only one person with a 3 ct stone so it is a novelty.

 

[Jennifer5973]

I think part of it is when you are recently enaged and people know it, they are automatically looking for the ring--hey, all us girls LOVE to see erings!

And if you have a great-cut, sparkly diamond and/or an especially large one, it creates more hysteria.

Some astute people look for inclusions but most are just admiring the ring. A diamond-savvy friend took my new upgraded ering off my finger and held it up against a light bulb and asked if it was "flawless" HA! That's a nice, super-cut & eye-clean SI2 for ya!

 

[reena]

yeah this is the thing--i don't think i'm bold enough to ever go up and grab someone's hand like that, but ever since i've starting looking at e-rings for myself, i've become like an obsessive stalker looking at people's hands on the street, and on the subway, and in restuarants!

isn't that so bad? but i cant stop!

 

[sevens one]

Oh Please! You've got me pinned!
Left hand, left hand- check out the LEFT hand.
I feel like I'm insane

BTW, Reena: how are you in the countdown? How many weeks?

 

[ame]

I always notice that stuff. Ryan never does. I comment on people on TV and out in restaurants. He thinks its pretty weird that I notice that. I think its because Im LOOKING to see. Obviously moving my head around when someones hand is moving to get agood gander.

 

[reena]

same here--my BF thinks i'm a total whackjob.

7/1: it'll be four more weeks as of this wednesday . . . and counting!!!

and that's just till the ring is done; i have no idea when i'm actually getting it. SIGH. guess i'll just have to keep stalking people's left hands in the meantime.

 

[ame]

Do you have another ring he gave you to wear there in the meantime? I know I wear the other band whenever my Ering is out of my hands.

 

[reena]

no, unfortunately. we're not married or even engaged yet, so i don't have squat.

but i do have a nice family RHR to wear, at least.

 

[mostlywatching]

That left-hand stalking doesn't stop once you get your e-ring either. I'm still surprised that I haven't been yelled at for staring. And that I haven't walked into any poles while my attention was elsewhere.

 

[alexah]

you've been holding out on us reena! where' the pics of your RHR?!

 

[sevens one]

----------------
On 9/13/2004 12:30:29 PM mostlywatching wrote:

That left-hand stalking doesn't stop once you get your e-ring either. I'm still surprised that I haven't been yelled at for staring. And that I haven't walked into any poles while my attention was elsewhere.

----------------

Oh heck yeah. It never ceases. It may even get worse.

 

[reena]

i'll post pics of the RHR this week!

 

[Julian]

Yeah, we all love sparkly things -- that's for sure!

So what do you do when people ask to try it on?

Usually I don't mind, but it is weird when you're in a boutique and a stranger wants to try on something worth tens of thousands of dollars. I mean -- couldn't they just run off with it?

 

[sevens one]

Oh that's just weird.
If it's a stranger say, "No, my fiance would kill us both!"
If it's a friend and you don't mind- let her at it!

 

[Julian]

WOW!

I wish I had you around to make all the clever replies to questions I don't know how to answer!

How very gracious and polite!

I want to shake your mom's hand for raising such a considerate person!

Witty, too!

I'm going to use that line!

 

[ame]

If they ask to try it on I say it won't come off over my knuckle. My other ring was dinged up because someone tried it on and dropped it giving it back to me.

 

[researcher]

I'm so glad someone else has the same problem! The other day I was at a Hallmark store in a nearby city that is not as afluent as the one in which I live, and this woman just grabbed my hand, looked at my ring, and said, "that's the best fake diamond I've ever seen!" I told her it was real, and she just rolled her eyes and walked away. I don't know if I was more upset with the fact that she felt it was her place to grab my hand without asking (several people ask if they may see my ring before grabbing my fingers and bringing them up to their face (I guess to steady my hand for a better look or something)), or the fact that she thought I was lying about my stone being real! All I know is the first thing that usually goes through my mind when people randomly grab my hand is I hope they don't try to steal my ring off my finger!

 

[researcher]

BTW, I don't mean I'm glad that you have to deal with rude people too, just that I'm not alone!

Guess it must be the draw of a 3+ ct stone!!!

 

[sevens one]

Researcher: "best fake diamond"
That's just down-right uncalled for. What's up with people.

 

[websailor]

Yup, people do this. It's embarrassing but also nice (unless they are downright rude).




My DW was even backed into a wall one time by a crowd of women wanting to see her ring...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Julian,
at a restaurant and a stranger walk pass our table and she said to my wife "that's a beautiful ring is it real ?" referring to her 3 ct ring ,so i reply by saying " dose it matter,you just said it's beautiful " on second thought i should of ask if her boobs were real,even though i knew they were silicones.







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