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Ruby selection for engagement ring

pallakonto

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 16, 2021
Messages
4
So I somehow managed to convince this girl that I want to marry her, but she wants a ring. I think diamonds are tacky, overcommercialized, depreciating assets, and just not very special; so I thought I'd get a ruby.

She wants a rose gold wedding set, with diamonds in it somewhere.

I want something that will retain most of its value.

I've gone through the stickied list of stores; now I'm kind of in overload. Anyone got advice on how to keep both of us content? Best hue and setting type to look for? best certification for value retention?

I did read the other stickies, but I'm not as concerned about perfect gems as fitting our personal preferences. Thanks for any comments!
 

lovedogs

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 31, 2014
Messages
13,642
Slow down a minute. What does *she* think about diamonds? Does she expect a diamond engagement ring? If yes, buy her one. Neither rubies, diamonds, or any jewelry will hold value. It is like a car in that regard. So I would dispel any notions of anything you buy holding value.

Rubies will not hold value more than diamonds will. Both are something you buy to enjoy, not to retain value. If she wants a diamond, buy her a diamond. An engagement ring is not about you, it is about her and what she loves.
 

pallakonto

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 16, 2021
Messages
4
Slow down a minute. What does *she* think about diamonds? Does she expect a diamond engagement ring? If yes, buy her one. Neither rubies, diamonds, or any jewelry will hold value. It is like a car in that regard. So I would dispel any notions of anything you buy holding value.

Rubies will not hold value more than diamonds will. Both are something you buy to enjoy, not to retain value. If she wants a diamond, buy her a diamond. An engagement ring is not about you, it is about her and what she loves.

I appreciate your well-meant advice; thank you. She is happy with the prospect of a ruby, but she had never considered the possibility.

Most of the research I have done says that a gemstone ring will hold value better than a diamond of similar pricing; I like rubies. Thus, a ruby ring set.
 

pallakonto

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 16, 2021
Messages
4
PS. rubies are extremely hard to purchase. Arguably harder than diamonds. If you look at a trusted vendor (https://gemfix.com/gem-category/ruby) they are extremely expensive for finely colored stones. Under 4K will be extremely difficult unless she is ok with a smaller stone.

Yes, I believe I could end up with a quality stone around 1 carat, or a lesser stone in the 2-3 range. I'm not in a huge hurry; I'll wait if I must.
 

rosethorn

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jan 4, 2020
Messages
54
Over the $4k budget but I’ve been salivating over this ruby from Yvonne:

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Cerulean

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
2,463
You are coming onto a diamond forum and kicking things off with "diamonds are tacky?"

I'd love for you to cite your research TBH about how well gems hold their value

To what @lovedogs said - whatever your research turned up, no gem is going to hold it's value unless you are talking about extremely rare, investment grade, on the verge of museum quality gems (you are talking 40-100k plus at least) - anything you pick is a depreciating asset. There are folks on here who have been buying and selling gems for years.

Do NOT select a stone bc you think it's a better investment. Get what she likes, not what you like. She's wearing it. If you both like rubies, awesome!

I'd recommend reaching out to a pro like Inken at: https://www.enhoerning-jewelry.com/

Someone can help you navigate the ins and outs of different colors and can help you select a stone if you aren't even sure what hues you like yet - for example, rubies come in a range of reds. Some lean pink, some of have purple, orange or even brown undertones. Some "glow" which is desired - but many, many do not but are still technically rubies but possess virtually none of the desirable traits other than being red corundum
 

voce

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 13, 2018
Messages
4,678
Many rubies do not look good in rose gold. I think the one from Yvonne will look good in rose gold, but many rubies are purplish and "icky". If going with ruby of at least 1 ct please plan to spend at least $6k, and educate yourself on heated vs unheated rubies, and how rubies are valued, since you want it to "hold value" over time.

If she's set on rose gold, I think blue sapphire or pink sapphire would look better in rose gold than ruby, plus they are more bang for your buck!
 

Garnetgirl

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 7, 2014
Messages
1,140
I’ve always gone with the philosophy that when I buy a gift for someone, I try to get what I think THEY will like.
I also hope that I will like it too.
But if I don’t, too bad. It isn’t about me, but rather, about trying to please the recipient.
 

westofhere

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Nov 22, 2020
Messages
134
The markup for jewelry is so high it generally depreciates, rather than appreciates . If the goal is marriage, though, then the goal is to keep the ring, rather than sell it, so value down the line really doesn’t matter :)

Why did she choose ruby? It’s not the best stone for rose gold. A pink sapphire with a diamond halo would be lovely, though. A halo lets you buy a smaller, better quality stone but still have finger coverage.

Remember that it’s her ring, so her call—just as you won’t want to spend every day wearing a band you couldn’t stand, she needs to love what she looks at every day.
 
Last edited:

westofhere

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Nov 22, 2020
Messages
134
Maybe try browsing Era Gem together: https://eragem.com/

If you search “ruby rings,” you’ll notice that most are set in white gold or platinum because the white metal really makes the red pop!
 

LilAlex

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 3, 2018
Messages
1,220
Most of the research I have done says that a gemstone ring will hold value better than a diamond of similar pricing; I like rubies. Thus, a ruby ring set.

Almost nothing in your price-range will "hold its value." At that budget and with two rings, you will spend more in labor and materials than the center colored stone. And when (if) you or your heirs go to sell, they will get next to nothing for that labor + materials. As a retail customer, you are paying 2X - 4X the "memo" or even wholesale price for the stone. You can only sell to another retail client -- and they will not buy from you. (Ask me how I know.)

All that said, I do think like you -- I would rather spend $5K for a decent small unheated sapphire that will retain some value than that same amount for a showier heavily-treated or synthetic stone that will not.

When I was at your stage (and congrats, btw!), I shopped like mad to squeeze a few hundred dollars out of a one-ct RBC with a GIA report -- and it makes me laugh now.
 

Mreader

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
2,057
Slow down a minute. What does *she* think about diamonds? Does she expect a diamond engagement ring? If yes, buy her one. Neither rubies, diamonds, or any jewelry will hold value. It is like a car in that regard. So I would dispel any notions of anything you buy holding value.

Rubies will not hold value more than diamonds will. Both are something you buy to enjoy, not to retain value. If she wants a diamond, buy her a diamond. An engagement ring is not about you, it is about her and what she loves.

100%!!!!
 

Bron357

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 22, 2014
Messages
5,368
My 5 cents.
Rubies are beautiful and expensive.
Rubies can be lab grown or heavily treated (flux filled) and you can’t tell this from a photo. That’s why either reliable certification or a “rock solid” ie trustworthy vendor is considered essential.
There is nothing “wrong” with lab grown material except you want it disclosed as such so you pay $100 and not $10,000!
Heavily treated gems are not recommended to purchase, they aren’t robust or stable (they treat them with glass/ flux to fill in the cracks and fissures). Again, this mightn’t be disclosed if not using a trusted, reputable vendor.
Large size, untreated Burmese rubies were a good investment if you bought them 10 - 15 years ago.
Buying a ruby these days, unless at the premium end, if you buy well it should hold value but no guarantee.
The ring setting that you will buy new or might have made to suit will only be worth a little over scrap value once “pre loved” unless a designer name. Even then, preloved value is around 60% to 70% of purchase price.
When you buy new or have made, part of the price is hand making / finishing plus taxes etc. So the $2,000 brand new setting is worth maybe $750 to later resell.
So you can’t look at jewellery bought brand new or having had made as being able to hold its value let alone increase in value.
 

Wanaka

Rough_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 19, 2018
Messages
98
Congratulations on your engagement.

Lots of good advice for you to ponder on this thread.

I suggest setting your ruby in platinum or white gold, then the rest of the band in rose gold as your fiancée prefers that metal. Example albeit in platinum and yellow gold: https://www.addysvintage.co.uk/art-...iamond-engagement-ring-vintage-18ct-platinum/

Currently on sale for under USD3k, a sizeable ruby / AGL-certified red-pink sapphire from MasterCut Gems: https://www.mastercutgems.com/Produ...Sapphire_1_48_carat_VIDEO_-Gem.php?FromPage=1
 

fantapanda

Shiny_Rock
Joined
May 31, 2019
Messages
139
I would suggest going to a local jewlery store and trying out different colored gemstones and ring styles in rose gold and see her reaction to each. I know an engagement ring is meant to be a surprise but you also want her to LOVE her ring and wear it. My husband was very opinionated about the engagement ring he wanted to get for me because he's in the design field but liked certain designs and wanted only rose or yellow gold. Only took us 5 years to agree on something but now I am happy and so is he.

Seconding that rubies don't really look good in rose gold. Not sure if value is really a consideration if you're looking to buy something of sentimental value. Perhaps a lab diamond so you're not overpaying?
 

chroman

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
May 18, 2015
Messages
1,079
Echoing what everyone else said about thinking of this as an investment. Its going on a finger, every day. There are so many ways that ‘investment’ can go to zero even before you think about selling it (which is another whole issue..).

Now.. rubies. Pink ones? Red ones? Super dark? Orangy? There’s a lot of subtle differences, and do you have a feel for what you all might like color wise? Your budget is not unreasonable, especially moee toward the high side.

Have you looked at spinel? Spinel prices have exploded over the last 10-15 years. I mean, not paraiba level, but still. Has it peaked? Who knows. Here’s a few:

(Check pearlmans for this - its listed cheaper, but harder to link)


Claims it leans orange, but it may not be coming through in the photo…

there’s some IG vendors who probably have more spinel to check out too if this route is interesting…
 

chroman

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
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May 18, 2015
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