Reset or Upgrade?

[UpgradeMe]

Hello, I''m new here. Been lurking for a bit but finally got up the guts to register and ask for advice. Here''s my story... I''ll be celebrating 15 years in January. When we were engaged I gave hubby the solitare that was my Mom''s (she passed away in ''93) when she was married to my Dad and said, "Here...give this back to me!" All I know about this ring is that it''s supposedly a great stone (had it cleaned recently, the jeweler couldn''t find any inclusions in it) and it''s set I think in a cathedral setting in white gold. It''s approximately .5 carats. Hubby and I were only 19 at the time and we chose the ring "jacket" to go with it and I wore the entire thing as my ering. Then when we were married I added the band.

I''m torn between whether or not I should just reset these stones or if I should get an entire new one. Hubby is NOT a jewelry buyer. I know, I know. Shame on him! He just doesn''t think it''s necessary to spend that amount of money on something so vain. Whatever. I''ve gone round and round with him and he won''t change his mind. I on the other hand am all about the bling. I like big and flashy. I WANT big and flashy. Apparently that makes me vain. Whatever. So, I would say the most I''m going to get out of him or be able to spend without hearing about it for the next 50 years is approx $3-$4K.

Last year I bought a cheapie ring to wear when we were on vacation and it was very similar to this one... http://www.netaya.com/4cw1502d-00.html Fell in love with it on my hand and told Hubby if he ever found one in real life to buy it for me! Of course since then I''ve found all sorts of other rings and now I''m torn on what I should get.

I really do love the halo but is it too trendy? It almost seems like they are just EVERYWHERE these days and am I going to be sad that my ring looks like everyone elses? I love the bezel setting that I had in the cheapie ring I talked about. So I thought about resetting my current stone with the other diamonds from my "jacket" making a halo. But I fear I''ll not think it''s quite as big as I''d like. I just don''t know if I can afford a 1ct center stone which is really what I''d like in the end I think.

After putting so much thought into it I''m just torn as to what I should do. I''d sort of like to keep the same style somewhat to my current rings. For instance... include some milgrain, have two diamond bands on the outside, and have it be wide. I like WIDE. I also sort of like a little skin showing through though.

One thing I thought about, if I don''t reset what I have is getting a Beverly K band like this one that I LOVE... http://store.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry/view/3644/1009/ . Then placing thin diamond bands on either side of it that a solitare could attach to. Does that make ANY sense? lol Almost like the solitare was a split shank ring and the Beverly K just slides in underneath it. Would that be just God awful ugly though? It''s not in my head but I just don''t know if I can truly visualize it.

Ugh. Too many decisions! I''ll shut up now. Thanks for reading this far if you made it through.

I guess I''m just looking for suggestions from all you pro''s of things that you think "fit the bill" after I described what I''m looking for.

Oh! And here are my current rings. I have no idea of any specs but the solitare is .5 I think and the jacket equals .25 total.

Ugh...can''t figure out the pictures. I''ll work on it.

 

[Circe]

Vain seems like a strong word - is it a source of false pride to have something that brings true pleasure? Possibly if you tie a lot of self-worth into it ... but after 15 years of wearing your lovely, sentimental piece, that hardly seems to be the case! You want something pretty that brings you aesthetic pleasure: I don''t see a danged thing wrong with that.

As to what to get ... for 3/4K, you can have a gorgeous custom setting built. Halos are very popular on this site, and in magazines, but I can''t say that I''ve seen too many of them IRL (and I''m the kinda gal who''s *always* looking for the shiny). Another look that I think is stunning with stones under 1 ct. is the pave etoile style ... a half bezel setting transitioning smoothly into a broad, sparkling band. So elegant! I''m not quuuuuuuiite sure I get what you''re describing with the Bev. K. band: would you want to have a head for your stone set directly *onto* the band, and flank it with thin eternities? Or are you envisioning your current band *being* one of the flanking bands? I think the former would be lovely, but something about the balance of the latter strikes me as off ... but, that''s just me, and I could be misunderstanding you completely.

And, as a final note ... when you say, 3/4K, do you mean as a lifetime jewelry budget? Or do you mean *for this anniversary*? With that budget, you could keep your current stone as-is, buy a nice 3/4 ct. in a simple setting from a place with an upgrade policy, like WhiteFlash or Good Old Gold, and keep trading up towards a 1 ct. for a later anniversary ... in the meantime, please do post pics! You have to resize them to fit, and be sure to have a unique file name (and, if you have major problems, you can e-mail them to the administrators, and they''ll post them for you). Welcome to PS!

 

[RxTechRN2b]

Halos seem trendy in magazines and on the internet, but I''ve only seen one IRL besides my own. Mine is 0.75 ct and the other one I saw was a white round diamond less than a ct worn by a doctors wife. You could use your 0.5 ct and set it into a bezel with a dainty halo around it -- the small centers with very delicate melee look so classy to me. It has to be well done to look good, though. I also like the idea of the etoil(sp?) ring, the half carat is the perfect size for it and it has the bezel that you like and it is wide too, and could be stacked with thin bands!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

If you want big and flashy, then maybe you could do this in steps. Buy this .96 ct. K/SI2 RB from GOG (or something similar): http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/4536/ and have it set into an inexpensive solitaire setting. Wear it with your current band while trying to decide between halo or solitaire. If you decide to keep the solitaire setting, then add the Beverley K band you posted a photo of or other BK stacking bands on each side.

If you decide you want a halo, then have the diamond reset into a halo. Have you thought about the Ritani Endless Love collection with their bezel set halos? I tried on one with sapphire sides and an eternity band on each side. It looked amazing! In the meantime, have your mom's diamond set into a pretty halo pendant like this one: http://www.whiteflash.com/Fine-jewelry/Pendants/Halo-Bezel-Pendant_1022.htm Do this over time so DH won't have a heart attack.

I don't think halos are that trendy. In fact, I was looking at some British bridal magazines from the year I was married (1992) and the jewelry ads featured several halo rings. Of course, Lady Di had a halo. I just think they are popular now and we have so many gorgeous designs available to us now. And Ritani has taken the bezel set halo to a new level. Regarding Hubby not being into jewelry, I decided to give myself a new wedding set for our 16th anniversary. We gave up long ago on the romance of him surprising me with jewelry. He knows not to even "go there".

 

[UpgradeMe]

Circe: You''re right. Vain is a strong word but that''s how he feels. Like I said, we''ve gone round and round. He just doesn''t see the reason to spend so much money on a piece of jewelry. I love the man dearly but this is a flaw of his. LOL I found a ring that sort of explains what I envisioned with the Bev K band but I can''t figure out where I saved it.

I''ll try to find it to share so you can see more what I mean. I do like the pave band on the etoile ring but I''m not sure the semi-bezel mount is for me.

RTechRN2b: I like the "classy" look you describe. I tend to lean towards that and then find bigger bulkier rings that I think I like more but in all honestly when I go back to the thin band I like it better. Maybe I need to just do the halo on a thing diamond band and stack thin diamond bands on either side. I''ve also thought of using a colored stone as the center stone to cut down on cost a bit and sapphire''s are Hubbies birthstone which I love but I just wonder if I''ll always regret not getting a true diamond for the center.

NeverEndingUpgrade: LOL Yep, I can''t tell you the number of times I''ve told Hubby I was just going to save my own money and buy an upgrade on my own. I still dream of him being romantic though. Not sure why, cause he''s not gonna change after all these years together! LOL

All: $3-$4 is what I would say is the lifetime budget. Who knows, something might change in the future. We were married young and immediately had a family. When we were engaged I always assumed that someday I would upgrade my ring. He just sees that the money it would take to do so would be better spent on braces and stuff. It''s taken me 15 years to get him to consider this upgrade. I don''t imagine that I''ll be able to tell him I want a change again in another few years. That''s why I''m so determined to really get something that I love because there''s a really good chance it''s what I''ll have forever.

I *think* I have finally resized my pics small enough to post. Let''s see!

 

[UpgradeMe]

Yeah! I did it! Here''s a couple more.

 

[UpgradeMe]

My avatar

 

[Circe]

Oh, you have beautiful hands with long, long fingers! You can definitely carry off a thick band. I love your current set: the diamond looks like a real beauty. Given that there are several different styles that you like, why don''t you go to a jewelry store in your area to try things on and see which style suits you most in reality as opposed to in your mind''s eye?

 

[decodelighted]

Gosh ... that diamond *is* a real beauty! And you have lovely hands ... Ditto the advice to really try stuff on ... LOTS of stuff ... before deciding which way to go. Since its gonna be your "one chance" to do it up

.

Once you narrow down the styles you like -- get look-a-like fakies & wear them for a week or two. To see what really works for your lifestyle. And to see if you can get used to a different look. If everyone did that we prooooolllly wouldn''t see so many e-ring-quick-change-artists around here!

 

[geckodani]

I am so jealous of your elegant hands! I have little short fingers, LOL. I agree that you can totally pull off a thicker band.

I think that a very delicate halo would be lovely with your beautiful stone. As others have said, there are a lot of halos on here, but I have yet to see one in real life. I also agree with the suggestion to go and try on a TON of different rings before deciding, especially if this could be your one shot at an upgrade. Make sure you find something you really like before going for it.

If you do a thin halo, (regardless of whether you keep your stone or get a new one) or thin solitaire in general, you could easily stack different style bands with it to change the look. Bands can be quite affordable too, so the possibility of changing the look of your ring without spending a ton of money in the future would be there too.

As for whether to reset or get a new stone, what is it about your ring you want to change? Do you want a bigger stone? Or are you just looking for change?

Keep us posted on what you decide to do!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Date: 7/26/2008 1:31:52 PM
Author: UpgradeMe

All: $3-$4 is what I would say is the lifetime budget. Who knows, something might change in the future. We were married young and immediately had a family. When we were engaged I always assumed that someday I would upgrade my ring. He just sees that the money it would take to do so would be better spent on braces and stuff. It's taken me 15 years to get him to consider this upgrade. I don't imagine that I'll be able to tell him I want a change again in another few years. That's why I'm so determined to really get something that I love because there's a really good chance it's what I'll have forever.

I am in the same boat, as are a lot of us. Once we got married, had a kid, had medical issues, big bills, no job promotions, old broken house syndrome and all the other life "stuff" that some of us have to deal with, bigger diamonds and new rings sort of went out the window. That is why I finally decided to upgrade my .36 ct. marquise myself to a new platinum wedding set and new diamond. It was a combo 15th anniversary, but never had an anniversary gift/graduating from college present. If he were to try to buy me a gift of jewelry, he would be hopelessly lost as to where to go and what to buy. Since he knows that I know where to get stuff, he it totally fine with me doing it (well, actually, it took him a while to get used to the idea). And even if he weren't fine with it--Too Bad!!!

PS. I will finally have my complete wedding set paid off and may be wearing it by our 17th anniversary. Yes, it took me that long to find the right diamond, including buying one diamond then trading it in for another one and driving 80 miles round trip for a wedding set! Glad I finally found "The One"!

ETA--You know what would look cool is to get a slightly larger center diamond, then use your diamond and get a matching one for a 3-stone look. Then you could use your existing diamond melee in a diamond shank like these from JamesAllen. A custom jeweler could do the work so you could use your own diamonds. Sorry no photos, just links:

http://www.jamesallen.com/products/item_60-2408.asp
http://www.jamesallen.com/products/item_60-1889.asp

Or this one from Knox Jewelers:
http://www.knoxjewelers.biz/index.htm?crn=202&rn=332&action=show_detail

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Knox:

 

[MMT]

I''ve been married for 12 years and I''m just in the process of upgrading. My husband doesn''t understand my love of jewelry or the money involved. He spends alot of money on things that I don''t understand also. He supports my purchase. I felt guilty at first but finding this website has cured me of that. You have very pretty hands and your ring is gorgeous. If your not happy take your time and figure out what you want. Show me the ring has alot to look at and get ideas. Anyway take your time, you deserve it. Good Luck!!!

 

[luvmyhalo]

Ooooh, good idea NeverendingUpgrade! Me likey!!!!! I think this would be a great way to use your beautiful diamond and get a blingier set at the same time! Haha...leave it up to PSers to get you to re-set AND upgrade all at once!

 

[geckodani]

NeverEndingUpgrade is genius.

You get to keep your current stone, and upgrade simultaneously. This is of course assuming you like 3 stone rings, LOL.

 

[Irishgrrrl]

Date: 7/26/2008 6:48:55 PM
Author: NeverEndingUpgrade
Knox:

I like this one! It''s very similar to my e-ring setting, so I may be a bit biased though! LOL!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Date: 7/26/2008 7:20:38 PM
Author: geckodani
NeverEndingUpgrade is genius.

You get to keep your current stone, and upgrade simultaneously. This is of course assuming you like 3 stone rings, LOL.

Thank you! I'm showing this to my husband!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Date: 7/26/2008 6:51:59 PM
Author: luvmyhalo
Ooooh, good idea NeverendingUpgrade! Me likey!!!!! I think this would be a great way to use your beautiful diamond and get a blingier set at the same time! Haha...leave it up to PSers to get you to re-set AND upgrade all at once!

Thank you, and I love your ring too!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Date: 7/26/2008 7:34:14 PM
Author: Irishgrrrl

Date: 7/26/2008 6:48:55 PM
Author: NeverEndingUpgrade
Knox:

I like this one! It''s very similar to my e-ring setting, so I may be a bit biased though! LOL!

I think it is such a pretty style. Don''t they just have gorgeous things on that site?

 

[geckodani]

Date: 7/26/2008 11:10:57 PM
Author: NeverEndingUpgrade

Date: 7/26/2008 7:20:38 PM
Author: geckodani
NeverEndingUpgrade is genius.

You get to keep your current stone, and upgrade simultaneously. This is of course assuming you like 3 stone rings, LOL.

Thank you! I''m showing this to my husband!

LOL! I hope he takes it to heart.

 

[UpgradeMe]

Thanks for the compliments on my hands. Growing up my mom used to always say I could be a hand model. LOL Now I just notice that they are looking too much like the nearly 35 years that they''ve been around! I''m actually 30 pounds heavier than I should be as well so my rings look a bit snug right now. Ugh.

I think you''re right. I need to just get out there and try on. Trouble is, I live in a fairly small town with not a whole lot in the way of options.

Geckodani: I want bigger. BIGGER. hee hee I love the fact that this solitare was my mom''s. I just love bling. And I''d like to either incorporate more blingage onto this stone/ring or just reset her stone in a pendant or something. I''m a pretty sappy sentimental girl so if I don''t just reset this stone, as I said before I''d like to maybe incorporate some of the aspects of my current set into the new one.

NeverEndingUpgrade: Hmmmm, you''ve given me something to think about. Actually, I HAVE thought about a 3 stone ring but honestly...I''m not a huge fan. I think it''s because I like the look of a larger center stone with the thin band on the sides. I know I said I like wide bands but I think what I should have said is that I like wide SETS via stacking of rings. LOL The stone in my current set was my mom''s when she was married to my dad. I think it''s like .50. Then she married her high school sweetie and he got her a solitare that is like .51. (He had to 1-up my dad. hee hee) So, I think there''s probably a pretty good chance I could get that one too. Then I''d just need the center stone and the setting. Right? I haven''t given it a lot of thought though because like I said I''m not a big 3 stone fan. But since you posted this I looked around and I might be having second thoughts. LOL Especially after I saw a pic of the Ritani Endless Love 3 stone ring with matching eternity bands on either side. Hmmmm...

I think I need to get out there and try on some 3 stone rings. Then I''ll also just go crazy trying other designs on as well. I''ll definitely keep you all posted. Thanks so much for all your help so far!

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Upgrade, I had my heart set on a halo style when I decided to treat myself to a new wedding ring. I looked at everything from Ritani Endless Love to Kirk Kara, and many others and you know what I ended up choosing? A 3-stone from Tacori. So, I ordered a Richard Landi halo ring to wear on my right hand. But I surprised myself by falling in love with a 3-stone with a wedding band. I will attach a photomontage that I have posted many times. My rings don't have diamonds on the bottom of the bands, that is the only difference.

The cool thing about yours is that you have family heirlooms to work with. I had nothing! So, you at least have some pretty diamonds with a story behind them. I bet a gorgeous round or oval would look great with your diamonds!