Pregnancy FREAKS me out!
- Thread starter trillionaire
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I remember HS where they would show those natural child births I swear as a way of deterring teen pregnancy, and being in horror of that at that age, so self-conscious of one''s body at that age.
I was not a maternal person when younger, would see a drooling baby and they would just look like a formless not-too attractive blob to me. But when you get older, things change. I loved hearing the stories about my parents, and my parents parents and wanted to be a part of that connection. I agree with whoever said they were more scared of the responsibility of 20 years of raising a child to be a good whole member of society versus the physics of 9 months pregancy and childbirth.
I think pregnancy and labor are really interesting. I may never climb Mount Everest, but I can bring a another person into this world, how cool is that? A women''s body is a machine, transformer-like that can support two functions, supporting your own life functions, and growing another person, that was endlessly fascinating. And you don''t have to even think about it, it''s just happens, unfolding inside you. So it''s got to feel a little unreal. Same thing about labor. Your mother, and your mother''s mother and all up the line had gave birth to a healthy child, and excepting possibly your mother, did it all without all the modern medical interventions we are used to. We are born to do this. My grandmother was barely 5 feet, had her children with near stone age medicine in rural Greece. When I was pregnant and my hips were bothering me, or I had doubts I would think, well she did it, I can do it too.
Now should we talk about how weird it is to like eat food and it turns into energy in our bodies?
I was not a maternal person when younger, would see a drooling baby and they would just look like a formless not-too attractive blob to me. But when you get older, things change. I loved hearing the stories about my parents, and my parents parents and wanted to be a part of that connection. I agree with whoever said they were more scared of the responsibility of 20 years of raising a child to be a good whole member of society versus the physics of 9 months pregancy and childbirth.
I think pregnancy and labor are really interesting. I may never climb Mount Everest, but I can bring a another person into this world, how cool is that? A women''s body is a machine, transformer-like that can support two functions, supporting your own life functions, and growing another person, that was endlessly fascinating. And you don''t have to even think about it, it''s just happens, unfolding inside you. So it''s got to feel a little unreal. Same thing about labor. Your mother, and your mother''s mother and all up the line had gave birth to a healthy child, and excepting possibly your mother, did it all without all the modern medical interventions we are used to. We are born to do this. My grandmother was barely 5 feet, had her children with near stone age medicine in rural Greece. When I was pregnant and my hips were bothering me, or I had doubts I would think, well she did it, I can do it too.
Now should we talk about how weird it is to like eat food and it turns into energy in our bodies?
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I''ve never been the maternal type, and conceptually, pregnancy does creep me out a little: not so much the mitosis-like element of making another human being, but the act of suborning all of my own desires to the needs of another being, and going through a hell of a lot of discomfort, and eventually pain, in the process.
I miss sushi! And wine! And not throwing up after every meal! Labor sounds really unpleasant, episiotomy sounds worse, and c-section worst of all!
And yet. I''m 11 weeks along now, and today I saw an awfully ... human-looking, for lack of a better word, fetus up on the ultrasound screen, sucking its thumb. It was kind of disgustingly cute, and I''m on board with the idea that all of this is just practice for the ensuing lifetime of sacrificing and suffering so that s/he won''t have to. I think having 9 months of "practice" will make all of that a lot easier.
P.S. - Trillionaire, I get the feeling the initial motivation behind the thread was to maybe find like-minded, potentially childfree boardmembers? If that''s the case, sorry for the thread-jack. I''m sure as hell not trying to convert anybody - just sharing a little on how perspectives can change.
I miss sushi! And wine! And not throwing up after every meal! Labor sounds really unpleasant, episiotomy sounds worse, and c-section worst of all!
And yet. I''m 11 weeks along now, and today I saw an awfully ... human-looking, for lack of a better word, fetus up on the ultrasound screen, sucking its thumb. It was kind of disgustingly cute, and I''m on board with the idea that all of this is just practice for the ensuing lifetime of sacrificing and suffering so that s/he won''t have to. I think having 9 months of "practice" will make all of that a lot easier.
P.S. - Trillionaire, I get the feeling the initial motivation behind the thread was to maybe find like-minded, potentially childfree boardmembers? If that''s the case, sorry for the thread-jack. I''m sure as hell not trying to convert anybody - just sharing a little on how perspectives can change.
Gypsy
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I'm prego-phobic. It's a very personal thing. I actually have started to like babies a lot. And think they are interesting and neat. But pregnant woman make me panicky, especially ones that are ready to pop. I always want to get them a chair, a drink, give them my seat, my place in line. For myself though, the concept terrifies me. I am a commitment phobe, period, and the thought of that level of commitment, letting someone share my body, terrifies me. Plus there is labor.
Yes, I am very happy my mother didn't feel the same way. But that doesn't make my feelings wrong. And if John and I are ever ready to be parents we've seriously discussed adoption, in large part because of my fears. But also because I don't have that feeling of wanting to pro-create. I think the nurturing and raising portions sound intriguing, and know that there are PLENTLY of people who apparently have no problem pro-creating, but won't or can't nurture and raise their children. So I think of it as a trade off. They can handle the parts I can't, and I will handle the parts they can't. And some baby (or toddler or child) somewhere will be given life, and then John and I will do the nurturing and raising that his/her birth parents can't provide them.
Yes, I am very happy my mother didn't feel the same way. But that doesn't make my feelings wrong. And if John and I are ever ready to be parents we've seriously discussed adoption, in large part because of my fears. But also because I don't have that feeling of wanting to pro-create. I think the nurturing and raising portions sound intriguing, and know that there are PLENTLY of people who apparently have no problem pro-creating, but won't or can't nurture and raise their children. So I think of it as a trade off. They can handle the parts I can't, and I will handle the parts they can't. And some baby (or toddler or child) somewhere will be given life, and then John and I will do the nurturing and raising that his/her birth parents can't provide them.
Hudson_Hawk
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Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Oh gosh how I love this thread! I thought I was the only one who''s freaked out by the whole ''having children'' thing. When I was growing up I always thought I''d have kids 2-3 of them. Now I really don''t know if I want kids. I mean, a part of me does but the other part is HORRIFIED of the thought of being pregnant. Last month or so FF and I watched this Nova pregnancy show/movie whatever and it made me want children even less. I honestly think he put it on so we can watch it to try and have me more comfortable of the thought. Because I really think he wants them a little more than I do. However, he and I both are unsure about having kids but of course we talk about it. He also knows that I don''t like the idea of pushing something out of my vajayjay....its disgusting to me. I''m too small of a person. The child will break me...
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
I often wonder how they......*clears throat*...go to the bathroom. I mean, are these kids taking craps inside of you? That''s even more disgusting. And sure, we have discussed c-sections but then I don''t like the idea of being cut open either.
The whole thing FREAKS me out completely....
Um...are you kidding me???? Please tell me you''re joking. Clearly you were too busy looking at little blue books when you should have been paying attention in Biology/Health.
Hudson_Hawk
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I''m a little preggo-phobic. Mostly because of the epesiotomy, but more because of the lack of sleep that comes right after it. My mother had my little brother at 44 (I was 13). I was there for every messy, nasty, painful second of the labor. No drugs, high risk pregnancy, complications at birth...very scary for a 13 YO. BEST.BIRTH.CONTROL.EVER!!!
Having a child at 44 aged my mother. We adore my brother, but she''s never been the same physically since then.
Having a child at 44 aged my mother. We adore my brother, but she''s never been the same physically since then.
steph72276
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Seriously, if it was so horrible people wouldn''t go back and have another (or 1
. It''s not that bad and really, you pretty much forget about the labor after you are holding your child and realize the miracle that your body created.
. It''s not that bad and really, you pretty much forget about the labor after you are holding your child and realize the miracle that your body created.VegasAngel
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Ditto.Date: 6/22/2009 8:11:05 PM
Author: steph72276
Seriously, if it was so horrible people wouldn''t go back and have another (or 1
I loved being pregnant, really hated L&D but it wouldn''t keep me from having another child if I wanted one.
When I was sure I never wanted a child I never even thought about the pregnancy process. Just knew I didnt want to take care of a kid at that time & that was it.
Mara
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i have friends who absolutely hate pregnancy, two in particular who feel that way, but went back for a 2nd kid...saying it would be worth it in the end. one of them is 6.5 months right now and says the time is just crawling for her, she feels huge as a house and is on a sugar-free diet according to her DR...but she is like 'its worth it'.
the whole thing is a little bizarre, i do agree. i have never been one of those people enamored by the process. i watched a show on it years ago and the whole show was about how the baby is essentially a parasite as it will just take what it needs from your body. it's funny because it seems like so many times people are worried about the baby getting nutrients or the baby this or that and in reality, your body is built to give the baby what it needs at the detriment to the mom. you crave things because YOU need it, your body does. most likely the kid will be fine, happily hanging out in there while your body gives what it can...and then calls out to you to replenish it.
anyway you are def not alone..the idea of growing something in your body is freaky!! but amazing, too. people have kids so it must be worth it in the end right?!?!
the whole thing is a little bizarre, i do agree. i have never been one of those people enamored by the process. i watched a show on it years ago and the whole show was about how the baby is essentially a parasite as it will just take what it needs from your body. it's funny because it seems like so many times people are worried about the baby getting nutrients or the baby this or that and in reality, your body is built to give the baby what it needs at the detriment to the mom. you crave things because YOU need it, your body does. most likely the kid will be fine, happily hanging out in there while your body gives what it can...and then calls out to you to replenish it.
anyway you are def not alone..the idea of growing something in your body is freaky!! but amazing, too. people have kids so it must be worth it in the end right?!?!
ChargerGrrl
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This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
Kaleigh
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No words.Date: 6/22/2009 8:52:40 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
Erinleigh
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Trillionaire... I''m totally with you on this one. It''s always creeped me out... I mean, to each his own, and I totally respect anyone who has had/wants to have children... but it''s just not for me (the birthing or raising processes)! I''m lucky that FF is in the same frame of mind as I am, lol!
chiapet
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Yes! I''m so glad to read all the responses from women who are freaked out by pregnancy. I actually LOVE babies and children (I''m a pediatric therapist) but the whole idea of pregnancy and labor is just... blech! Good for you women who enjoy pregnancy and giving birth. I really admire all of you who are brave enough to go through all that.
Did anyone see that Oprah show about hiring surrogate mothers from India at a fraction of the cost of surrogate mothers in the US? Let''s just say, I''m contributing regularly into my Indian-Surrogate-Mother-Fund.
Did anyone see that Oprah show about hiring surrogate mothers from India at a fraction of the cost of surrogate mothers in the US? Let''s just say, I''m contributing regularly into my Indian-Surrogate-Mother-Fund.
purrfectpear
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Maybe airheads shouldn''t have children? Fear might be a natural deterrent
1. You don''t pick whether you want a C-Section, so you better suck it up and decide if you''re willing to squeeze a cantaloupe through a straw.
2. You can be extremely small and still have a natural birth. Ever notice those tiny Viet women who weigh about 90 lbs. having kids? Yup, size is not an automatic factor.
3. It''s not so weird having a child grow inside, but it''s no picnic having back labor for 31 hours. Worry about the pain, not the 9 months of summersaulting in the tummy.
1. You don''t pick whether you want a C-Section, so you better suck it up and decide if you''re willing to squeeze a cantaloupe through a straw.
2. You can be extremely small and still have a natural birth. Ever notice those tiny Viet women who weigh about 90 lbs. having kids? Yup, size is not an automatic factor.
3. It''s not so weird having a child grow inside, but it''s no picnic having back labor for 31 hours. Worry about the pain, not the 9 months of summersaulting in the tummy.
Linda W
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Date: 6/22/2009 8:57:03 PM
Author: Kaleigh
No words.Date: 6/22/2009 8:52:40 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
One thing I will say. I am so glad I had my daughter. Now I have two beautiful grandboys, who I love and they love me.
Bia
Ideal_Rock
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See? That''s what I''m talking about...I shiver thinking about it...forget about having to DO it! eeeek!Date: 6/22/2009 10:22:06 PM
Author: purrfectpear
1. You don''t pick whether you want a C-Section, so you better suck it up and decide if you''re willing to squeeze a cantaloupe through a straw.
whitby_2773
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Date: 6/22/2009 10:25:48 PM
Author: Linda W
Date: 6/22/2009 8:57:03 PM
Author: Kaleigh
No words.Date: 6/22/2009 8:52:40 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
OMG!!! I have absolutely no words either.
One thing I will say. I am so glad I had my daughter. Now I have two beautiful grandboys, who I love and they love me.
of course they do. very sensible grandchildren showing exceedingly good taste.
xofieryred33143
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My OB and I had a conversation last week about how nervous I am about labor and she said the same exact thing to me. She reminded me that women have babies all the time and then go for more so it can''t be that bad.Date: 6/22/2009 8:11:05 PM
Author: steph72276
Seriously, if it was so horrible people wouldn''t go back and have another (or 1
I think its normal to feel weirded out about pregnancy. I know I was and every time I looked at my baby during the ultrasounds, I was waiting for that connection that it is my baby or that what I was seeing on the screen was actually inside of me. It all felt really foreign. Even now I have a house full of baby stuff everywhere and even have a bassinet in the room and it still feels like a total mystery to me.
Her first movements though were absolute heaven. It was such an intimate moment and it''s actually something I''m going to miss a lot once I have to share her with the world.
Bia
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Fiery, have I ever told you, you''re an awesome chick? Well you are. I''m really excited for you and can''t wait to see that babygirl of yours!Date: 6/22/2009 10:41:37 PM
Author: fiery
Date: 6/22/2009 8:11:05 PM
Author: steph72276
Seriously, if it was so horrible people wouldn''t go back and have another (or 1
My OB and I had a conversation last week about how nervous I am about labor and she said the same exact thing to me. She reminded me that women have babies all the time and then go for more so it can''t be that bad.
I think its normal to feel weirded out about pregnancy. I know I was and every time I looked at my baby during the ultrasounds, I was waiting for that connection that it is my baby or that what I was seeing on the screen was actually inside of me. It all felt really foreign. Even now I have a house full of baby stuff everywhere and even have a bassinet in the room and it still feels like a total mystery to me.
Her first movements though were absolute heaven. It was such an intimate moment and it''s actually something I''m going to miss a lot once I have to share her with the world.
okay...sorry for the sap, just feeling extra mushy lately. ((I better not be pregnant! hehe jk))
Linda W
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Date: 6/22/2009 10:27:30 PM
Author: whitby_2773
Date: 6/22/2009 10:25:48 PM
Author: Linda W
Date: 6/22/2009 8:57:03 PM
Author: Kaleigh
No words.Date: 6/22/2009 8:52:40 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
OMG!!! I have absolutely no words either.
One thing I will say. I am so glad I had my daughter. Now I have two beautiful grandboys, who I love and they love me.
of course they do. very sensible grandchildren showing exceedingly good taste.
Thank you dear Whitby. I am still sitting here shaking my head at the remark "babies pooping inside of you".
Dreamgirl: You live at home. Please sit down and have a talk with your mother, about pregnancy and babies.!!!!!!!!!!! I am sure she will explain everything to you!!!!!!!
Tacori E-ring
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I did not read all the responses but not everyone is *meant* to be parents. Bottom line. There is nothing wrong with that. Personally I ALWAYS wanted to have kids. I played with dolls, babysat, always knew I was meant to be a mom. Even I was nervous about both pregnancy and L&D. Pregnancy is really a miracle. I am in awe of it. I think it is also empowering. I grew a little person inside me and now I watch her grow and learn and it is an amazing experience. I am still shell shocked but my L&D (almost 20 months later) but everyone has different experiences. Was she worth it? Of course! Even if I may never have a flat tummy again.
fieryred33143
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The feeling is totally mutualDate: 6/22/2009 10:50:56 PM
Author: Bia
Fiery, have I ever told you, you''re an awesome chick? Well you are. I''m really excited for you and can''t wait to see that babygirl of yours!Date: 6/22/2009 10:41:37 PM
Author: fiery
Date: 6/22/2009 8:11:05 PM
Author: steph72276
Seriously, if it was so horrible people wouldn''t go back and have another (or 1
My OB and I had a conversation last week about how nervous I am about labor and she said the same exact thing to me. She reminded me that women have babies all the time and then go for more so it can''t be that bad.
I think its normal to feel weirded out about pregnancy. I know I was and every time I looked at my baby during the ultrasounds, I was waiting for that connection that it is my baby or that what I was seeing on the screen was actually inside of me. It all felt really foreign. Even now I have a house full of baby stuff everywhere and even have a bassinet in the room and it still feels like a total mystery to me.
Her first movements though were absolute heaven. It was such an intimate moment and it''s actually something I''m going to miss a lot once I have to share her with the world.
okay...sorry for the sap, just feeling extra mushy lately. ((I better not be pregnant! hehe jk))
And I agree...you better not be pregnant!
TravelingGal
Super_Ideal_Rock
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Come on everyone, give the girl a break. We all know that babies don''t poop inside you unless they''ve eaten a couple of big macs, and then it all gets mixed in with mom''s poop anyway.Date: 6/22/2009 10:52:13 PM
Author: Linda W
Date: 6/22/2009 10:27:30 PM
Author: whitby_2773
Date: 6/22/2009 10:25:48 PM
Author: Linda W
Date: 6/22/2009 8:57:03 PM
Author: Kaleigh
No words.Date: 6/22/2009 8:52:40 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?
This has got to be the most idiotic thing i''ve read on PS.
Grow up!
**threadjack over**
OMG!!! I have absolutely no words either.
One thing I will say. I am so glad I had my daughter. Now I have two beautiful grandboys, who I love and they love me.
of course they do. very sensible grandchildren showing exceedingly good taste.
Thank you dear Whitby. I am still sitting here shaking my head at the remark ''babies pooping inside of you''.
Dreamgirl: You live at home. Please sit down and have a talk with your mother, about pregnancy and babies.!!!!!!!!!!! I am sure she will explain everything to you!!!!!!!
phoenixgirl
Ideal_Rock
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- Mar 20, 2003
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- 3,390
I totally get the absurd part, and I will never truly understand how we can make a new person out of nothing, but I don''t find that icky as you do. Just mind-boggling, but not stomach-churning or even hair-raising. I''ve got my first little alien kicking me from the inside right now, and honestly, it feels normal and right. It makes me giggle and pat her. I''m sure it''ll get old as she gets a little bigger and the kicks hurt more, but I can''t relate to the "alien" part, although I''ve heard other pregnant women make that comparison so I''m not judging.
P.S. Want to gross yourself out? Google "sonogram" and "Skeletor." We had just found out we were having a girl, totally overjoyed, watching her bop around. There was a leg, there was her back, she was waving, then, without warning, she turned to look at us. Talk about scary!!! Why did no one tell me my sweet little baby would look like Skeletor if we got a shot of her face?
P.S. Want to gross yourself out? Google "sonogram" and "Skeletor." We had just found out we were having a girl, totally overjoyed, watching her bop around. There was a leg, there was her back, she was waving, then, without warning, she turned to look at us. Talk about scary!!! Why did no one tell me my sweet little baby would look like Skeletor if we got a shot of her face?
luckystar112
Ideal_Rock
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Jas, did your birth story mention anything about your husband making sure that you tooted? I remember reading a birth story about that a while back and it was so hilarous. I can''t remember if it was you.
luckystar112
Ideal_Rock
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I totally agree with you about this, which is why I won't get a 3D ultrasound (or is it 4D?) when the time comes. But at the same time I bet you people were saying the same thing way back when technology first allowed couples to find out the sex!
BlueSki231
Brilliant_Rock
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- 855
you are not alone.. i feel exactly the same way as you do.
and i have absolutely no desire to have children.
and i have absolutely no desire to have children.
jas
Brilliant_Rock
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Not exactly...my DH was in the room with me for 5 days non-stop. During that time every fricking hospital employee was asking me my tooting history. Didn''t matter who else was there. My husband just got the most s***-eating grin on his face every time I had to answer.
It was awesome when they asked me the tooting question in front of my inlaws.
But yeah, my birthing story was pretty funny. I actually kinda enjoyed the whole thing from start to finish (it was 3 hours total)...water broke on my dog. That''s my story.
Anyway, yeah, pregnancy. If you don''t have a sense of humor, it''s gonna get ugly.
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