Pregnancy FREAKS me out!

[trillionaire]

K, I know there are a lot of moms around these parts, so this might be unpopular to say, but here goes.

Pregnancy seems like the most absurd thing to me.

As more friends become pregnant, the more strongly I feel.

I am totally weirded out by the fact that there is a PERSON growing inside of someone else. Um, EW. And by ew I mean, I need a personal moment, maybe in the bathroom. Ick.

Then, even worse, it COMES OUT! Seriously, you just squirted out a person that never even existed before. Does that not strike anyone else as absurd? Natural or not, I cannot make peace, rhyme of reason of this in my head. It just gives me the heebie-geebies!

Am I the only one that feels this way?

I''m sure those who want kids, have kids or are happy being preggo don''t share my view, which is fine! Congrats and good health to you and yours!

I am really looking for any like minded folks who are brave enough to respond!

Am I alone???

 

[Lovinggems]

I would love to have kids but I''m not sure I can cope with natural birth, I''ll probably get a c-section.

I don''t think you''re bad at thinking the way you do, some people are just very adverse to having kids.

 

[lilmissrugger]

here''s the thing- I definitely want to have kids one day, and I''m so excited-- but it also kind of creeps me out.

I mean, I don''t think my prego-phobia is as strong as yours, but it''s so weird to me to invision feeling another PERSON move inside of me, kicking me and such. I know that there will be days when I''ll think it''s one of the cutest things, and other days when I''ll just want it OUT OF ME because it''ll be creepin'' me out.

Maybe I''ve just watched "Alien" too many times?

Babies are cute, and I cannot wait to get pregnant one day...but I totally understand where you''re coming from

 

[Kelli]

It doesn''t gross me out, but I definitely think it''s weird and I''m not sure if I''ll ever be able to do it or not. Even if I do someday want kids, I won''t be one of those people who thinks pregnancy is beautiful. I''ll still think it''s weird! I don''t need to run to the bathroom to be sick over it, but I know a guy with a pregnant wife who does. Apparently lots of people feel that way.

 

[AdiS]

No, trillionaire, you''re not alone. I think I''d like to have kids with my husband as a vague notion somewhere in the future. I mean, maybe, one day. But the problem is, right now I don''t find any trace of maternal instinct in me. Ergo, giving birth doesn''t sound magical and miracle-of-nature-ish (lol) to me. It sounds horrifying. As well as the whole process of bringing up a child and not being able to have your personal time and space any more. The idea that another person would depend on me for everything, the baby''s life would be in my hands, doesn''t help either. I guess that means that I''m just not ready.

I''m well aware some would disagree and I respect that. This is a very intimate choice and we all feel different about it.

As a matter of fact, hubby loves children and I suspect he''s ready for us to have them right now but he is not putting any pressure on me. Maybe when the idea of getting pregnant, giving birth and raising a child ceases to petrify me, that''d mean I''m mature enough to be a mother.

 

[trillionaire]

My SO''s SIL is expecting any day now, and I think all of the barages of sonograms have really hit home for me. Everyone else is oohing and ahhing, and all I can think is EEEEEEK!

And the idea that a person is going to exist ANY moment now, that was never here before? That is like the twilight zone to me! I''m sure I will be thrilled when one of my sibs is having a baby, but I am seriously just weirded out by it all. Not the weight gain, or the morning sickness, but the growing of a person!

 

[MakingTheGrade]

I generally view pregnancy with a kind of frightened awe. I do not really look forward to my OBGYN rotation, it will either desensitize me or I''ll just have constant flashbacks of Alien/Matrix type scenes, lol.

It is pretty weird though, I just try not to think about about it. It actually used to freak me out a lot more...until I came to med school and saw pictures of all the other really weird, gross things that can happen...like a guy who peed lettuce.

 

[Sabine]

At the risk of offending my fellow preggos over in family and home, I''ll out myself and say that while I have enjoyed being pregnant at times, at other times it still freaks me out. Feeling movement is cool, but sometimes it also feels like I have a parasitic alien inside of me! I don''t find it cool what having this other human being inside my body does to my body either. And birth? Yuck. I don''t see it as a miracle. I can''t wait for it at this point because I want this baby out of me and I want to meet my baby, but I do NOT see it as beautiful, I see it as a painful, horrible thing that I have to go through to get the end result (which I happen to see as worth it, but I can imagine what it must seem like to those who don''t even want kids). And then there''s breastfeeding...something I will do because it''s whats best for my lo, but something else that just totally kinda grosses me out.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 6/22/2009 7:54:17 AM
Author: Sabine
At the risk of offending my fellow preggos over in family and home, I'll out myself and say that while I have enjoyed being pregnant at times, at other times it still freaks me out. Feeling movement is cool, but sometimes it also feels like I have a parasitic alien inside of me! I don't find it cool what having this other human being inside my body does to my body either. And birth? Yuck. I don't see it as a miracle. I can't wait for it at this point because I want this baby out of me and I want to meet my baby, but I do NOT see it as beautiful, I see it as a painful, horrible thing that I have to go through to get the end result (which I happen to see as worth it, but I can imagine what it must seem like to those who don't even want kids). And then there's breastfeeding...something I will do because it's whats best for my lo, but something else that just totally kinda grosses me out.

Sitting here with my 5 week old daughter on my knee, all I can say is ditto (except the breastfeeding part)!

Parasitic alien is about right - you feel icky for weeks/months, you get swollen ankles/knees/thighs and can barely walk, you have no clothes and your belly looks like you've swallowed a watermelon whole!

My DH was kind of horrified and in awe as my body ceased to look anything like normal - and he was definitely not in the 'a pregnant woman is truly beautiful' camp at all...

On the birth, I had a really traumatic time (54 hours ending in theatre with ventouse followed by forceps (just avoided a c-section thank goodness), life-threatening post-partum haemorhage and 2 days in ICU). However I also had an epidural after the first 40 hours which was seriously WONDERFUL, and as I had an instrumental delivery I didn't have to spend hours pushing, so I kind of bypassed most of the 'birth' bit which I don't feel 'deprived' over - all natural with nothing more than whale music and lavender oil was never on my birth plan

. The mega-episiotomy is/was not so great though - thank god for morphine!

I was lucky that I didn't get stretch marks, I've lost all but 10lbs of the baby weight already (and I put on 72lbs

), it made my skin amazing, my hair was really nice and I had really great nails for the first time in my life!

I am the least maternal person most of my friends and family know, never imagined I have kids and yet here I am at 36, I adore my daughter and she was worth all of it, and is still worth the lack of sleep, the two hours each way non stop screaming in the car yesterday, and still having no clothes (that I can breastfeed in) and those I do have all generally covered in spit-up...

 

[princesss]

Sabine took the words right out of my mouth - parasitic alien.

I''m not at all interested in pregnancy. It creeps me out. It''s exactly what you said - this thing that DID NOT EXIST is suddenly growing in somebody''s body. It comes into being out of nothingness. It''s weird.

But, when you think about it...how freaking cool is that? It came out of NOTHING. And boom - it turns into something like us. That''s a little bit cool.

So I''m cool with the theory of it - just the whole creepy, "I''m growing a miniature person in my uterus" part weirds me out.

 

[iluvcarats]

Date: 6/22/2009 2:54:32 AM
Author:trillionaire
K, I know there are a lot of moms around these parts, so this might be unpopular to say, but here goes.

Pregnancy seems like the most absurd thing to me.


As more friends become pregnant, the more strongly I feel.


I am totally weirded out by the fact that there is a PERSON growing inside of someone else. Um, EW. And by ew I mean, I need a personal moment, maybe in the bathroom. Ick.


Then, even worse, it COMES OUT! Seriously, you just squirted out a person that never even existed before. Does that not strike anyone else as absurd? Natural or not, I cannot make peace, rhyme of reason of this in my head. It just gives me the heebie-geebies!

Am I the only one that feels this way?


I''m sure those who want kids, have kids or are happy being preggo don''t share my view, which is fine! Congrats and good health to you and yours!


I am really looking for any like minded folks who are brave enough to respond!


Am I alone???

Interesting since you were once one of those "parasitic aliens" who was "squirted out".

 

[neatfreak]

I have two kids and of course it''s a little freaky and odd-but it''s also an incredible incredible thing to look at your kids and know that YOU made them and that they wouldn''t have existed without you.

That feeling is something that you can only understand once you have kids though-so you''ve got to deal with the freakyness first to get there.

 

[princesss]

Date: 6/22/2009 9:33:26 AM
Author: iluvcarats

Date: 6/22/2009 2:54:32 AM
Author:trillionaire
K, I know there are a lot of moms around these parts, so this might be unpopular to say, but here goes.

Pregnancy seems like the most absurd thing to me.


As more friends become pregnant, the more strongly I feel.


I am totally weirded out by the fact that there is a PERSON growing inside of someone else. Um, EW. And by ew I mean, I need a personal moment, maybe in the bathroom. Ick.


Then, even worse, it COMES OUT! Seriously, you just squirted out a person that never even existed before. Does that not strike anyone else as absurd? Natural or not, I cannot make peace, rhyme of reason of this in my head. It just gives me the heebie-geebies!

Am I the only one that feels this way?


I''m sure those who want kids, have kids or are happy being preggo don''t share my view, which is fine! Congrats and good health to you and yours!


I am really looking for any like minded folks who are brave enough to respond!


Am I alone???

Interesting since you were once one of those ''parasitic aliens'' who was ''squirted out''.

You can be one and still think it''s weird.

 

[monarch64]

Nah, you''re not the only one who feels this way. I think there is a definite ick factor involved with pregnancy, but on the other hand, I think it''s sort of a miraculous thing, too. I used to have the same attitude as far as thinking it was kind of gross, but it seems the older I get and the more comfortable with my body and all of its functions, the less I think of pregnancy as gross and the more I think of it as kind of amazing.

 

[lucyandroger]

Date: 6/22/2009 10:09:08 AM
Author: monarch64
Nah, you''re not the only one who feels this way. I think there is a definite ick factor involved with pregnancy, but on the other hand, I think it''s sort of a miraculous thing, too. I used to have the same attitude as far as thinking it was kind of gross, but it seems the older I get and the more comfortable with my body and all of its functions, the less I think of pregnancy as gross and the more I think of it as kind of amazing.

Ditto.

Yeah, I''d have to say that a lot about the human body and its functions can seem pretty gross but when you think about how they contribute to running your body or creating new life they''re pretty cool. I doubt I''m the only one that thought sex was pretty gross when I first learned about it and I can''t imagine many girls thought getting their period was normal or cool.

 

[CJ2008]

All I can say is, I am so glad that not everyone thinks the whole pregnancy and having kids is the most beautiful and greatest thing ever.

I have no desire to be pregnant, go through childbirth, have kids, and then have to deal with them as teenagers. I am too selfish - a cat is all about I want to handle.

I was never really weirded out by pregnancy but now that I think about it, I could totally see how it could be really weird and how after a while you can't wait to get it OUT...thanks a lot Trillionaire! I thought I had ENOUGH issues with it on my own haha

ETA: I am also glad to see that some who call themselves non-maternal and who have these feelings also ended up being very happy once their children were here and they don't regret it. Because I have a feeling for me the same thing would happen...once you do it you're happy you did because you love the kid...so there is hope for me yet.

 

[makemepretty]

It freaked me out. I can''t stand body parts or having my ribs even bumped but I made it through two births/pregnancies. I was more worried about the epidural- a shot in my spine??? Yes, it''s kinda gross. You can feel a baby elbow or butt or whatever move across your insides. They even get hiccups. And then the baby has to come out! There is a definite design flaw in the female body. 7 plus pounds should NOT come out where it does. If that area has to rip or be cut and resewn up(either stomach or hoo ha then that''s a mistake in my opinion).

I LOVE my kids but if I could have grown them in a tank like sea monkeys, I''d so be on it.

 

[CJ2008]

Date: 6/22/2009 10:54:20 AM
Author: makemepretty
It freaked me out. I can''t stand body parts or having my ribs even bumped but I made it through two births/pregnancies. I was more worried about the epidural- a shot in my spine??? Yes, it''s kinda gross. You can feel a baby elbow or butt or whatever move across your insides. They even get hiccups. And then the baby has to come out! There is a definite design flaw in the female body. 7 plus pounds should NOT come out where it does. If that area has to rip or be cut and resewn up(either stomach or hoo ha then that''s a mistake in my opinion).

I LOVE my kids but if I could have grown them in a tank like sea monkeys, I''d so be on it.

HAHAHAHAHAAHAH

 

[makemepretty]

Also must add, that "breast may be best" but not in my case. I am NOT comfortable enough with my body to breast feed. No way, no how. They did just fine with a bottle of formula. They are honor roll students and excel in math(and love reading), so they turned out just fine without use of my boobies.

 

[jstarfireb]

Pregnancy and labor squick me out too. "Parasitic alien" is 100% true. Sure, you love the little alien, and it came from you, but it''s still completely dependent on feeding off of your body for survival and growth.

I''ve actually delivered a bunch of babies myself. When you''ve seen the kind of stuff that happens down there...no way! I happen to be one of the non-maternal types who wants a child-free lifestyle, but part of that is because I never want to be pregnant and give birth. But if I ever got pregnant, it would definitely have to be a C-section. I''ve seen C-sections too, and while they''re bloody and have a longer recovery period, they just seem quicker, cleaner, and less scary to me.

 

[steph72276]

Aren''t you glad your Mom didn''t feel the same way, Trillionaire

 

[Dreamgirl]

Oh gosh how I love this thread! I thought I was the only one who's freaked out by the whole "having children" thing. When I was growing up I always thought I'd have kids 2-3 of them. Now I really don't know if I want kids. I mean, a part of me does but the other part is HORRIFIED of the thought of being pregnant. Last month or so FF and I watched this Nova pregnancy show/movie whatever and it made me want children even less. I honestly think he put it on so we can watch it to try and have me more comfortable of the thought. Because I really think he wants them a little more than I do. However, he and I both are unsure about having kids but of course we talk about it. He also knows that I don't like the idea of pushing something out of my vajayjay....its disgusting to me. I'm too small of a person. The child will break me...

Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it's still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that's right, I'm a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I'll wait till I'm about 40 when I don't look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?

I often wonder how they......*clears throat*...go to the bathroom. I mean, are these kids taking craps inside of you? That's even more disgusting. And sure, we have discussed c-sections but then I don't like the idea of being cut open either.

The whole thing FREAKS me out completely....

 

[TravelingGal]

I think many women before pregnancy are freaked out by it. I used to think it just didn't sound right (delivering out of a hole the size of a peanut butter lid??! And it GETS that big???) and the thought of being pregnant made me physically ill, as did the the thought of being a mother. So I don't think you're alone trilliionaire. But somehow, women get over it, otherwise you or I would not be here.

Pregnancy is like slowly warming up water to boil. It comes slowly (minus morning sickness for some

) If it all happened overnight, I'm sure it would reduce women to hysterical wailing. It happens in a very logical way...they tell you you're pregnant. You feel nothing. And right when you think, this is weird, I feel nothing. Shouldn't something be happening? You get hit with morning sickness. Then you think, this freaking sucks! This better be worth it! Hey, you in there, are you THERE? Am I suffering for nothing? And you start WANTING to feel something, anything that will give you proof that you aren't suffering for nothing..

And then you wait...was that gas? Stomach growling? It flutters. Then tickles. Your eyes shift from side to side and and all of the sudden you realize you've been holding your breath. Oh my god, it's really there! And surprisingly, you let out a giggle...this is so WEIRD. And yet....cool! And for whatever reason, it gets cooler and cooler until it get annoying but by that point, you're more apt to be forgiving because strangely you've become attached to it and it's more scary when it DOESN'T move.

There are a few of us on this thread who just weren't maternal at all. But I think most people (assuming they aren't psychopaths) have the ability to love someone. So I think that we non maternal gals are the most shocked when we discover the power of maternal love, which does indeed, make it all WORTH it.

 

[Dreamgirl]

Nicely put TG. I certainly love the thought of a little person looking like me and FF walking around. So that''s partly why it''s still up in the air. I wont just write the idea of having children out of my life. I think it''s a fear for me though. And it would be tough to overcome. I never used to be this way until I started thinking about it and over thinking it....

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Oh gosh how I love this thread! I thought I was the only one who''s freaked out by the whole ''having children'' thing. When I was growing up I always thought I''d have kids 2-3 of them. Now I really don''t know if I want kids. I mean, a part of me does but the other part is HORRIFIED of the thought of being pregnant. Last month or so FF and I watched this Nova pregnancy show/movie whatever and it made me want children even less. I honestly think he put it on so we can watch it to try and have me more comfortable of the thought. Because I really think he wants them a little more than I do. However, he and I both are unsure about having kids but of course we talk about it. He also knows that I don''t like the idea of pushing something out of my vajayjay....its disgusting to me. I''m too small of a person. The child will break me...

Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?

I often wonder how they......*clears throat*...go to the bathroom. I mean, are these kids taking craps inside of you? That''s even more disgusting. And sure, we have discussed c-sections but then I don''t like the idea of being cut open either.

The whole thing FREAKS me out completely....

That could only be said by someone who is young...

Dreamgirl, I have a secret to tell you. If you have any degree of vanity now (and most women do), that DOESN''T go away with age. If anything, you only try harder to find the aging.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/22/2009 11:26:36 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Nicely put TG. I certainly love the thought of a little person looking like me and FF walking around. So that's partly why it's still up in the air. I wont just write the idea of having children out of my life. I think it's a fear for me though. And it would be tough to overcome. I never used to be this way until I started thinking about it and over thinking it....

It's normal Dreamgirl. TGuy and I got into an argument when I was hormonal and crying to him very close to the end of my pregnancy. "See THIS?!" I wailed, pointing to my monstrous belly, "It has to come OUT somehow! I'm SCAAAARED!!!"

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 6/22/2009 11:17:38 AM
Author: Dreamgirl
Oh gosh how I love this thread! I thought I was the only one who''s freaked out by the whole ''having children'' thing. When I was growing up I always thought I''d have kids 2-3 of them. Now I really don''t know if I want kids. I mean, a part of me does but the other part is HORRIFIED of the thought of being pregnant. Last month or so FF and I watched this Nova pregnancy show/movie whatever and it made me want children even less. I honestly think he put it on so we can watch it to try and have me more comfortable of the thought. Because I really think he wants them a little more than I do. However, he and I both are unsure about having kids but of course we talk about it. He also knows that I don''t like the idea of pushing something out of my vajayjay....its disgusting to me. I''m too small of a person. The child will break me...

Plus I think to myself it is very creepy to have something growing inside of you. Sure they are cute and all, but it''s still revolting to me. Not to mention my fears of what it will do to my body (yeah that''s right, I''m a little selfish...so what? lol) Maybe I''ll wait till I''m about 40 when I don''t look good anymore. Where else in the PS community can I feel comfortable enough to say stuff like this?

I often wonder how they......*clears throat*...go to the bathroom. I mean, are these kids taking craps inside of you? That''s even more disgusting. And sure, we have discussed c-sections but then I don''t like the idea of being cut open either.

The whole thing FREAKS me out completely....

I think everyone has body fears, but IMO... most women still look pretty awesome at 40. I''d like to wait until my 20-something body-consciousness disappears. I know a lot of women tend to become more comfortable with their bodies, flaws and all, in their 30s. Or at least I''ve heard that. Plus, most women also say that they''d do it to their bodies all over again because they love their kids like they never knew they could love anyone.

Pregnancy freaks me out, and FF. He''s freaked out about the whole something living inside of me thing. I think it''s pretty neat. I''m mostly frightened of the baby coming out, but I know I can handle it.

FYI, I don''t think babies poop in you unless they''re past due or there is distress of some sort.

 

[MakingTheGrade]

I just try not to think about it too much, if I do, I''ll never want to do it!
But fiance and I are both excited to raise a kid together, we both love to teach and play with kids.

Haha, it''s funny when I talk to women who recently had their 2nd child, more often than not, they tell me they don''t understand how they got talked into doing this a 2nd time around, lol.

 

[janinegirly]

TGAL pretty much touched on my thoughts (and dreamgirl, did you really say that about women who are 40?!).

Alot of things in life are weird if you think about it. Procreation, death, open heart surgery. I guess I can understand how it seems disturbing..it is very alien like when you're going through it, especially the wave of movements in your belly or a elbow sticking out. And I was terrified of labor as well..I mean I wasn't too thrilled about this "worst pain in human experience" thing. Thank god for medical intevention and drugs (haha).

But I guess I had a different perspective in that I like to experience life to it's fullest and couldn't imagine that without experiencing child rearing, pregnancy. Yes it's daunting and weird, and painful..but also life changing and fascinating. Especially watching life progress (from a dot on the ultrasound to a mini-me complete with personality!). And it pushes your bounderies for emotion too and capacity to love--such crucial parts to the life experience (in my opinion). Talk about glossing over..but just wanted to pop in a brief version of my thoughts. It's interestig hearing the differing views though.

 

[CJ2008]

I am so loving this thread...

It''s hearing from women who felt like me at one time say that they ended up being happy that makes me think I can handle it...

Does anyone else also worry about the ATTENTION they''ll get while pregnant? I''m not interested in that either. I definitely don''t want to sit on the phone with friends who already had babies telling me "see, I told you so, isn''t it wonderful and aren''t you so happy" and let''s share in all the wonderfulness

and all kinds of people wanting to take care of me. I''d like to just say "hey, guess what, I had a baby!" hahahahah