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Possible Tragedy Averted

WinkHPD

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I got a call Wednesday morning shortly after 9:30 from a neighbor of my mother's.

"Wink, would you go check on your mom, she has not picked up her paper or drawn the drapes and she wont answer the door or the phone."

I was not worried, someone is always calling for me to check on mom for one reason or another, but I immediately put down the ring I was getting ready to video and hopped on my scooter for the short ride to mom's house.

The neighbor was there and told me that she and mom had a mutual agreement to check on the other each day at 9 and to call if the paper was not picked up or the drapes not drawn.

I thanked her and entered the house, still not at all worried, my mom is a spry active woman who will be 88 on the 27th of this month. Little did I know what awaited me inside.

I first saw the walker that she recently got laying on its side and then became concerned. I looked and nearly did not see her, laying partly on her patio floor and partly on the two steps to the kitchen.

She had fallen and broken two ribs and hit her head. Unable to stand she tried to crawl up the steps, and could not do that either. She looked at me out of a pasty white face and said, "I can't get up," in a tiny tiny voice. Apparently she had lain there for at least one hour, and probably closer to two.

It seemed to take forever, but I eventually got her up and to the emergency room, over her objections. They kept her overnight and I brought here to my home yesterday evening. She is in a lot of pain, and even dilauded is not seemingly helping, although the dose they prescribed for her knocks me into lalalala lala land as I found out recently with a kidney stone.

We had recently tried to get her to wear one of those life alert things, but she said she had fallen thousands of times on the ski hill and on the tennis court and that a fall was just not a big deal to someone who had been falling all her life.

Needless to say she has agreed to wear one now.

Thank God for her neighbor's and her plan to watch out for each other. It could easily have been a day or two before I came to see her. I usually go over two to three times a week, but that could be an eternity when you are in pain.

Without meaning to sound too preachy, may I recommend that if you have elder family or friends recommend to them one of those life alert type things that can be worn around the neck, even in the shower, so that they are never beyond quickly receiving help!

Until Wednesday, I actually agreed with my mom that she would never need it, now I wish I had been a little more forceful. Thank goodness my lack of twisting her arm did not lead to any additional permanent harm.

Wink

P.S. Maybe today I will get that ring videod and photographed so I can send it out.
 

mayerling

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I'm glad you got there when you did.
 

lliang_chi

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Wink, I'm so glad you were there for your mom. How scary. My DH and SIL **insisted** that ILs get the LifeAlert too. It's definitely worth it! I'm glad you mom is relenting and getting one now.
 

MissStepcut

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Wink, I just wanted to mention to you that I was given the same painkiller after surgery, and the only thing it did for me is give me upset stomach. They switched me to vicodin and everything was smooth sailing. My nurses were surprised because most people have the "high" experience. Maybe it doesn't do the job for some people.
 

WinkHPD

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MissStepcut|1310750295|2969755 said:
Wink, I just wanted to mention to you that I was given the same painkiller after surgery, and the only thing it did for me is give me upset stomach. They switched me to vicodin and everything was smooth sailing. My nurses were surprised because most people have the "high" experience. Maybe it doesn't do the job for some people.

Very possibly true, I know that oxycodone did NOTHING for me when I had my kidney stone. With Dilaudin I was a very happy camper!

Wink
 

zoebartlett

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Oh no, Wink, that's too bad! It's a good thing you got there when you did. I think it's a great idea that your mom and her neighbor have the arrangement they do checking in on each other every day. I'm sure the medical alert necklace (?) will help put your mind and your mom's at ease now. I hope she has a speedy recovery!
 

Gothgrrl

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I'm sorry to hear about your mother, but glad she's alright. That is a good arrangement between the neighbors. I worry about my mother & step-father now that I'm so far away.
 

dragonfly411

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Wink - That's very scary. I'm sure your mother hated the feeling of helplessness too. I'm glad you were able to get to her and that she's with you now. I hope she heals swiftly.
 

Sha

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Oh my! I'm so glad she's okay. It's good that the neigbour was looking out for her - it's so important to have neigbours and people around who care, especially if you're living alone. Reading your story reminds me completely of the ad for Life Alert. I'm glad she's agreed to wear one so that both you and her can have some more peace of mind.
 

Lula

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I'm so glad she's okay, and even more glad that your mom and her neighbor had the foresight to put together such a great plan to keep an eye out for each other. I hope the Alert button allows her to have many more years in her home (and you many more years of peace of mind!).
 

yennyfire

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Oh Wink, thank goodness that your Mom is OK! (relatively speaking). The same thing happened to my 96 year old great aunt, except that it DID take 2 days for someone to find her and she is lucky to be alive. She is now in an assisted living facility where she has people who can look out for her a bit. I'm glad that your Mom has agreed to wear a Life Alert button and hope that she never needs it! Good luck getting that ring video'd!
 

VRBeauty

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I'm glad that your mother and her neighbor had a "check in" plan in place, and that it worked. Healing dust to your mother!
 

kelpie

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How scary for all of you and agonzing for your mom. I am so glad for her neighbor's watchfulness. I have looked into getting a life alert for my dad but in reviewing the company I found a lot of negative and predatory things written about the company since their clients are a vulnerable population. Is there a better alternative?

I hope she feels better soon.
 

JewelFreak

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Upsetting thing, Wink. So glad you found her relatively quickly. Hope the ring is great!

A 90-yr-old friend of ours had the same arrangement w/her neighbor, to check if her blinds were not up in the a.m. One morning they were still down -- the neighbor went across and found this old lady's house had been broken into the night before. The thief had a gun & forced her to sit on the bed & tell him where anything worth any money was. He made her stay there for several hours while he tore the house apart -- and ATE everything in her fridge. Would not even let her go to the bathroom. After about 4 hrs -- he must have been high, she had a very tiny house -- he left without, thank heaven, hurting her or worse. She was profoundly traumatized, never really got over it. In that rare case, I don't know if LifeAlert would've made things better or worse. It's a wonderful help in most cases.

Wishes for your mom to recover quickly!
 

luv2sparkle

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That happened to my mom too. She was on the floor for a day and a half. It was awful. I am glad you got to your neighbor so
very quickly Wink.
 

AGBF

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I am so sorry that you and your poor mother went through this, Wink. It was upsetting just to read the story. I am glad that there was a plan in place and that there is now an even better plan in place, but I wish your mother had not had to go through that at all. Give her our love.

Deb/AGBF
:read:
 

TristanC

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I'm glad everything turned out ok. It must be awful to be in that situation, and it was good that you had the instinctive response to rush right over.

I am surprised life alert still has a large audience with the proliferation of mobile phones these days. But I can imagine that unless you wear the phone on a hip/belt holster or the equivalent, it would be easy to be caught out without the phone on your person when you are at home. And often it is easier to just push a panic button. Wonder if there is an equivalent company locally...
 

vsc

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So glad you made it there early! I hope that your mom gets better very soon.

Now, someone has to design some jeweled cases for those ugly lifealert buttons.... :naughty:
 

slg47

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really glad you got to her when you did. that is nice that the neighbors look in on each other. i hope your mom has a speedy recovery.
 

KaeKae

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Thank goodness your mom and he neighbor look out for one another. May your mom have a full and speedy recovery. The lifealert syster sounds like the thing to do.
 

maplefemme

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Wink, I'm glad to hear your Mom is ok and not too badly hurt.
It's good she has that arrangement with her neighbor, and the personal alarm can really be a lifesaver. I know you'd wished you'd have pushed it sooner but don't beat yourself up too much, loved ones can be set in their ways (as we all can be!) even if we really want the best for them, sometimes the suggestion of getting personal alarms isn't met so well because it can be taken as a suggestion/admittance that we aren't as independent or able bodied as we once were.
My 95yr old Grandmother lives alone and only just agreed to get one after we found her unresponsive on her couch.
As for your Mother's pain control, if Dilauded isn't effective for my patients I use a Fentanyl patch as the next option. It might be worth mentioning to her physician to see if it is a suitable option for your Mother's pain control.
If she does take a fall again, I'd advise calling EMS to come out and assess her first, because if she breaks her hip you do not want to stand her up. I know though that the first reaction is to get her off the floor.

I hope she makes a full recovery soon
 

diamondringlover

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Wow scary stuff, glad you got there when you did and even though your Mom was hurt at least it wasnt any worse.
 

susimoo

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Wink,

I am so glad things worked out ok. I know what a worry elderly parents can be.
I am sending you, yours (especially your Mom) lots of Ps dust!!
You are in my thoughts. Give your Mom, my love and best wishes for a speedy recovery!
 

Arkteia

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Glad that things turned out fine? Best wishes to your mom!
 

bee*

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Glad to hear that your mam is ok Wink. That's a great idea that she has with her neighbour to check with each other.
 

WinkHPD

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We got her a Phillips Lifeline, it is waterproof and can be worn in the shower.

She is feeling much better today and is no longer taking the strong meds, just some Tylenol to keep any swelling down.

Thank you to all of you who wrote to give me your encouragement!

Wink
 

AGBF

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Wink|1310856723|2970553 said:
Thank you to all of you who wrote to give me your encouragement!

Wink-

I am sure that I speak for all of us. I felt terrible about the pain and fear that your mother went through the day she fell as I would about anyone her age who fell. The story of the fall was heart wrenching. Whether or not she was your mother, I would have had her in my heart. But you are a huge part of our community. Your mother, is, of course, dear to us. Continue to take good care of her! We are all glad she is so precious to you. It would be nice if all sons treated their mothers with so much love!

Deb/AGBF
:read:
 

Cehrabehra

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oh wink, I'm so glad your mom is okay! How scary! That whole 'I've fallen and I can't get up!' thing that so many make fun of is based in reality - a reality you and your mother now understand first hand. Yay for the neighbor too!
 

Amys Bling

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wow- that is so scary! glad you were able to get to her and that her and her neighbor look out for each other!
 

partgypsy

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I'm glad that your mom is okay.
 
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