POLL: To upgrade, or not to upgrade...

[chicnhed]

I am engaged, and my fiance and I picked out a BEAUTIFUL GOG .71ct asscher. We went with quality over quantity. I'm attached to the stone, but I can't help but think about those 1.5ct+ asschers and all their step-cut glory at larger sizes. At first we were against upgrading because we felt that this should be it, and we should put money in the future towards other things. However, now we've become so obsessed with diamonds (asschers especially) and we are now thinking we'd like to upgrade eventually, if possible of course.

So, I'd like to know your opinion on the subject of upgrading. Should people put that money toward something else? Does the engagement ring lose sentimental value if you do upgrade? or is it perfectly alright? Or, in fact, do you recommend upgrading if you can?

 

[Amys Bling]

I am open to upgrading. However, when it comes down to it- I would probably prefer a nice 3 stone or 5 stone ring for a big special anniversary as opposed to trading in my original Ering diamond for a bigger replacement.

If we had all the money in the world, and could afford to keep my original Ering and upgrade to a bigger version of it, then I would take that!

 

[Amys Bling]

forgot to mention- I have a 1.55RB, so IRL it's plenty big enough for my 5size finger. Maybe if my stone was .5ct I would sing a different tune

 

[Fly Girl]

I upgraded, but it was after 25 years, a house, two children, and established careers. To me it says, we made it. There is nothing wrong with having a smaller stone in those early years when there are lots of other needs. I've never regretted waiting. To me, any diamond over 1/2 ct is a nice sized stone for an engagement ring.

 

[chicnhed]

I upgraded, but it was after 25 years, a house, two children, and established careers. To me it says, we made it. There is nothing wrong with having a smaller stone in those early years when there are lots of other needs. I've never regretted waiting. To me, any diamond over 1/2 ct is a nice sized stone for an engagement ring.

I agree, we are definitely not thinking any time soon. In the future, if the opportunity comes up. I don't think anyone should go in debt over anything they don't need!

 

[Circe]

I am too sentimental to upgrade myself: I love my ring, and everything it symbolizes. When we got engaged, I was in graduate school and my husband was a post-doc: I proposed to him (and, let it be noted, offered to get him a diamond!), and it means so much to me that, non-traditional and not yet swimming in it, he still wanted me to have the best.

That said ... I am not in the slightest bit averse to anniversary rings.

For people who are less hoarder-ish, and who purchase from dealers with good upgrade policies? I say go to it!

 

[diamondringlover]

I upgraded, but it was after 25 years, a house, two children, and established careers. To me it says, we made it. There is nothing wrong with having a smaller stone in those early years when there are lots of other needs. I've never regretted waiting. To me, any diamond over 1/2 ct is a nice sized stone for an engagement ring.

Ditto this, except for me I upgraded at 20 years

 

[agapitor]

I upgraded, but it was after 25 years, a house, two children, and established careers. To me it says, we made it. There is nothing wrong with having a smaller stone in those early years when there are lots of other needs. I've never regretted waiting. To me, any diamond over 1/2 ct is a nice sized stone for an engagement ring.

Ditto this, except for me I upgraded at 20 years

same for me except upgraded after 10 years and kept the original stone as a pendant.

 

[bright&shiny]

I am open to it, but was really surprised when my husband (of six months - today) suggested this weekend that we upgrade. I am definitely open to it, but unexpectedly felt connected to my 'original' stone in a way that surprised me. I never thought I would think twice before upgrading... Who knew?

 

[D&T]

I upgraded after five years when we became more established, kept my original engagement ring. I consider any ring from my upgrade forward as my anniversary rings/upgrades.

 

[AprilBaby]

I upgraded at 25 years and made my original ring a pendant. I was too sentimental to part with it.

 

[Imdanny]

I think it's perfectly alright if both of you agree about it.

 

[rosetta]

I don't this is strictly an upgrade but I have two engagement rings. I'm not married yet.

One was the one FI picked out himself and surprised me with. I will never sell or change it.

The other I picked myself. I will reset these stones in all likelihood but never sell them.

I wear my smaller stone ring to work and the bigger one for fancier outings.

So I'm not in support of upgrades for sentimental stones, but yes for other stones.

 

[geckodani]

As long as you both agree, and the money is there, I don't see any problem with it. I doubt I'll upgrade mine unless something happens to it, but I do see the setting changing every now and again.

 

[dani13]

I totally agree with upgrading....I did last year after 2.5 yrs of marriage...And now Im thinking of changing my ring again (but not necessarily upgrading- just changing to a different shape). I thought I would be attached to my first stone, and I felt bad for hmmm, like a day But then I adored my new ring so much I didnt really think about it anymore. Besides, both MH and I picked my first stone together, so its not like he picked it out exclusively by himself or anything......I say if you have the means and your hubs doesnt care, then go for it!!!

 

[MustangGal]

I don't see anything wrong with upgrading as long as both of you agree.

I'm on my 3rd set of rings at 10 years of marriage. I developed an allergy to my original set, bought a new set with a sim center after 2 years of marriage (5 years with my first rings), and for our 5th anniversary got a platinum setting and 1ct diamond. I have my original set and will not sell it, mainly because I wouldn't make anything than for sentimental reasons. We did sell set #2 to fund #3. And DH says this is it until our 25th anniversary.

 

[MyDiamondSparkles]

I've upgraded once and plan to do so again within this month--I've been married for 26 years. I have kept my original rings because they are sentimental to me and eventually I may do something with them...like earings or a necklace or something.

That being said I was engaged with a 1/2 carat diamond--seriously that was a large diamond back then...things have changed for sure! We also bought quality over size....but now that I think about it I can't even tell you the specs of that ring, I don't remember. I was always very happy with that size but my husband really wanted me to get a larger diamond for years. I guess when we were buying a house, furnshing the house, raising kids, making investments for retirement, thinking about college funds the big diamond got put on the back burner for me. I don't like to finance anything so if we don't have the cash I don't buy.

So at 25 years I've got the house, investments, etc and money in savings and we go look at rings--mind you this was last year. I wanted a 1-1.5 carat vintage diamond ring. Okay, well I didn't know they would be hard to find. So after about a month of dragging my husband all over town I just decide to forget the vinatge ring and go with a classic solitaire. I have kind of small hands and so when I tried on the 2 carat it seemed HUGE! Escpecially since I had "known" my 1/2 carat for 25 years. So I ended up buying the 1.5 carart (which seemed huge to me at the time) with the plans to look for a vintage ring and when I found one buy it. So fast forward a year....and I'm looking again. But now I think the 2 carat is way too small and I want at least a 2.5 to 3 carat...pretty much a 3 carat because now I think the 2.5 carat is too small. How does this happen???? I have no clue....I've even been looking at some 4 carats...Mind you, that no one I've ever met wears over a 2 carat ring....most people around here think 1.5 ct is a HUGE size. The only person I ever knew with an over 3 carat was a friend who's husband sold diamonds to the diamond stores.....

Part of my wants a vintage ring because then peopole will think I inherited it---as in I didn't go out and spend a silly amount of money on a big diamond ring...ya know?

Anyway, I think it's very easy to become diamond size obsessed. I am wondering if there is a 12 step plan for the obsessed???? I remind my husand that HE is th eone that started the obsession.

I guess only you can make the decision to upgrade or not. It's a very personal decision. If you're not all that sentimental then I say go for it. BUT, in this economy (peoole loosing their jobs all of the time, investments going belly up, etc) I'd think twice about financing it. JMHO. In a few years after you a married you more than likley willl become house obsessed, furniture obsessed, preschool obsessed... you know what I mean? And at that time you usually stop thinking about diamond carat weight.

Hugs,
MyDiamondSparkles

 

[kenny]

"Meaning" is all in your head, so if you want a different diamond just transfer the meaning to the new diamond.

If that is not possible for you, then don't do it.
People vary so respect that others may not share your view on this, since your choice only applies to you.

You are the boss of your life, and there is no one right answer that applies to everyone unless you're talking about things like what 2+2 equals.

 

[chicnhed]

Awesome answers! MyDiamondSparkles thats a super interesting story!

To note: this thread is more about hearing YOUR thoughts and opinions on the subject, and not so much me asking for advice. To everyone: I promise I am not stressing about this nor will I sell my first born in order to get a bigger diamond. This is something my fiance and I just started wondering about (for the future (i promise)) and I like facts so I made a poll to see what other people think on the subject *for themselves*.

 

[Frenchcut]

I'm about to choose my e-ring with my fiance and if I may never have the chance to upgrade in the future, but I think there are two things to consider: is it sensible to spend even more on a ring when you already have one ? If you don't have other important things to buy first and the answer is yes you should wonder if it would not make more sense to keep your e-ring and get another diamond ring like a three stone ring to complement...?

Of course it's all very personal and I'm not against upgrading but I think an e-ring is truly unique and there can be only one...I'd rather have another ring and keep my original e-ring, especially if I can wear both at the same time.

 

[afreebird]

I think it would be really cool to one day get a larger version of my e-ring. I'm not sure I could part with my original e-ring, though, which surprises me. There's really not a sentimental bone in my body, but the fact that my husband picked out my ring all by himself means a lot to me, plus I love how proud he is of my ring. He carried it around in an little round blue Blistex container the entire time we were in Hawaii before he proposed; he even took it snorkeling with him. If I had known he was hiking/snorkeling/spelunking lava tubes with my ring in his pocket the entire time, I would have gone absolutely NUTS with worry.

Anyway, I say upgrade to your heart's content. I don't know if you're like me, but once I get a bee in my bonnet, I can't be satisfied until it's accomplished. Like most of the other posters have said, whether you hang on to your original stone is up to you.