Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ears?

[Smith1942]

Well, I never thought I'd be asking this question. I had my ears pierced at age 12 - since my parents wouldn't let me before then - and I was so excited to get it done. I chose the CZ bezel studs and I have never looked back!

So imagine my surprise when I was discussing earrings with my husband recently and he said that his previous long-term girlfriend had been dead set against having her ears pierced, due to it being somewhat lower class. Then, years later, another girlfriend who had ALSO been dead set again having her ears pierced, then did get it done.

I had no idea at all that people of my generation (I'm late thirties) ever looked at pierced ears this way. My husband and these exes were six years older than me, therefore not much. I've never encountered people my own age like this who are sniffy about pierced ears! I wondered if anyone else has ever noticed this. We're only talking about a single piercing here! I can see that multiple piercings might not fit in with certain circles, but one?

THEN, my husband said that his father (born 192 wouldn't let his mother (born 193 have her ears pierced on the grounds that it was common. Huh? The father was born in Ecuador to Danish parents and spent a portion of his life in the UK before settling in America at about age 26. So he had a cosmopolitan upbringing in different places; therefore I'm not sure how much of his odd attitude can be ascribed to the norms of any country in particular.

AND, the father left the mother for another woman back in 1978, and my MIL still doesn't have her ears pierced! If I were her, I'd have had multiple body piercings after being told what to do like that! But I think perhaps she holds the same attitude about pierced ears.

Anyway, I then remembered that a slightly snobbish girl at school said she wasn't allowed to get hers done until 16, but then she never had it done, and although it was many years ago, I remember some suggestion from her that it was common.

I'm amazed by these opinions - perhaps my husband's parents can be excused due to their ages, but my own generation? What a strange attitude to single piercings!

If piercings are somehow common, then I guess all earrings must be common, even a diamond baby bezel! But people including my MIL did wear clip-on earrings, which are large. Clunky clip-ons are OK but delicate diamond pierced earrings are not?

Interestingly, the Queen has her ears pierced, and I think Queen Victoria did too, because in the link below it says that she had diamond studs mounted on posts.

http://graciejewellery.blogspot.com/2011/04/countdown-to-royal-wedding-diamond_19.html

Anyway, I'm amazed by these attitudes to pierced ears and I wondered if anyone here has contemporaries who are snobby about single piercings in the ears? Perhaps it's just another mechanism by which someone who isn't that secure can feel better. If I adopt the attitude that pierced ears are common, and you have pierced ears, then if I meet you, I can feel superior. That sort of thing.

God, I can't imagine not having my ears pierced. Some of the light would go out of my life if I couldn't wear my earring collection! I wear earrings every single day of my life and feel under-dressed without them, even if I just wear baby bezels.

ETA: I have changed this to a poll, and I had to vote "Yes, in my own age group." Very odd!

 

[Laila619]

Re: Are Pierced Ears "Lower Class" For Anyone Here?

Well, I don't like pierced ears on babies at all, but I don't see anything wrong with it for adults. I've never thought it was low class for adult women. Maybe multiple piercings or cartilage piercings, but not just a single piercing.

 

[Smith1942]

Re: Are Pierced Ears "Lower Class" For Anyone Here?

No, it has never occurred to me either that anyone would think a single piercing for adult women was common! That's why I'm so amazed, and wondered if anyone else has ever heard of these attitudes.

It's funny, the things that come to light sometimes.

 

[woofmama]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Interesting topic. I remember my grandmother telling me that the young girls in the roaring twenties started the ear piercing craze.
The flappers did what they could to be different and racy for the times, as I understand it.

Having grownup in a largely catholic middle class Chicago neighborhood, where most of the home owners were Irish or Italian descent almost every girl I knew had their ears pierced by junior high. I think mine were done when I was 10 years old. A neighbor lady did all of ours. We gathered around the kitchen table with bowls of ice cubes and held them on our lobes to numb them. Then she poked thru our earlobes with a large sewing needle and thread. We all kept our little tied pieces of thread in our ears and cleaned them every day for a couple of months until it healed, then we got earrings. Barbaric really Mine poor lobes got infected the first time around but I had it done again and it worked. Awww memories

 

[JewelFreak]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

It was a fashion cycle over a couple of generations. Victorians & earlier had pierced ears, largely, I imagine, because there weren't good hinges (or any, in history) & springs for clip earrings. In around the 20s or 30s to the early 60s everything was clip-on & pierced ears were thought common. My mother wouldn't let me get mine pierced so at around 15 I had a friend's mother do it for me anyway. It was in style again & all the cool earrings were pierced.

I don't like pierced ears on babies either, but can't imagine getting along without it as an adult, myself.

 

[anne_h]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

No for me for adults.

But when we discussed it for our daughters, my British husband and his British friends and family generally frowned on it, due to a perceived association with certain demographic groups.

However, we live in North America and I had no such issues so in the end we went ahead.

Anne

 

[iLander]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I think, if you look back --Waaaaaayyyyy back, like the 1600's -- they were a lower class decoration. I think the Romany tribes, generally known as Gypsies, had pierced ears for hundreds of years. In Europe they were regarded as thieves and scoundrels, and no one wanted to associate with them. Just picture a generic gypsy fortune teller in your mind. Notice the hoops in her ears. There is some debate about the origin of Gypsies, some think they were Roman, but now other scholars have said they may actually be Egyptian. Interestingly, Egyptians have pierced their ears for thousands of years (check out King Tut).

My grandparents hated pierced ears because they were old European. They thought they were --and I am quoting-- "for whores and the prostitutes." One of the first things I did upon moving out was get my ears pierced.

I think from a sheerly practical matter, it's just less likely that you will lose a pierced earring. And I have no negative associations with it.

 

[dk168]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I had mine done when I was 11 with my mum by my side, at a jewellers.

It was done the old fashion way at the time in Hong Kong (1976), marking the earlobe with a dot of antiseptic red, rubbed with a piece of raw ginger, and pierced using the sharp end of a 22/24K yellow gold hoop.

I remember applying more antiseptic red to my ears afterwards to prevent infection which was not a pretty sight, and had to keep turning the hoop to prevent the hole from ceasing up.

I never wanted to wear more than one earring in each ear, hence I did not have more piercing after that.

I have never encountered any negativity towards my ear piercing all these years.

DK

 

[iLander]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

So, right after posting that, I thought of Vermeer's "Girl with a Pearl Earring". This is obviously a pierced earring. And it is an enormous pearl, which is not cheap. BUT, no one knows who the girl is, and some say she was just a figment of Vermeer's imagination and didn't exist at all.

So, I'm not sure if pierced earrings were, historically, a good thing or a bad thing. And I'm not sure what the basis is for the "Lower class" association. Does anyone know? I'm interested to hear.

Pierced earrings would be a fascinating subject for a fashion major's thesis.

 

[iLander]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

No for me for adults.

But when we discussed it for our daughters, my British husband and his British friends and family generally frowned on it, due to a perceived association with certain demographic groups.

However, we live in North America and I had no such issues so in the end we went ahead.

Anne

Curious to know, which group? Please say, I'm trying to understand.

 

[kenny]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Nothing surprising here.
People just vary, which is endlessly upsetting for many people.

If you like pierced earring for yourself or for your boys or girls, then go for it.
If you don't like it, then don't do it.
One single way is never right for everyone.

 

[Amber St. Clare]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Ohhhh................you should have heard my MIL when my son got his ear pierced.She was afraid for his, how shall I say ths?-orientation. He was in the second grade. The look on my MIL's face was absolutely PRICELESS when she saw it.

I have four holes in my ears, he has three. The husband has none I guess he's a social step above us

I worked in his school, {private} and I was called down to the office and told he had to take the earring out. I was ready. The handbook said earrings were allowed as long as they didn't dangle. Studs were OK. I told the principal there NOTHING in the hand book about boys wearing earrings and if that was her biggest probem with my kid she was wasting my time.

He now wears three hoops, but he has a corporate job and doesn't feel established enough to whip out the bling. Strictly for weekends now.

 

[Rhea]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I don't know how to vote. I have met a woman, just the one I think, who thought that ear piecing was, I don't even really know what she thought...it wasn't a class thing I don't think...or perhaps it was. She was older than me by some 12 odd years so not an older generation, but not close enough in age that I honestly felt as though she was a peer. She looked down on jewellery in general as being false, expensive, fake, and gold-digging and was known to say that she wasn't shallow enough to want jewellery. Yet she'd spend quite a bit on clothes and home furnishings...guess we all have our things. Earrings were the worst offender to her jewellery hatred but I never really cared enough to delve into why with her. Her views of the world were very ridge and I found it best to avoid her rather than challenge her. She's been the only person vocal enough to bring up earrings to me though I know a few women who don't have their ears pierced. I have no plans to ask them why not!

 

[jstarfireb]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Nope!

 

[distracts]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I wasn't allowed to get it done at 12 like all the other girls I knew (I also wasn't allowed to dye my hair or watch R-rated movies!), and once I was past the point of ear-piercing being a common experience, I was scared of having a hole poked in me! It sounded painful! AND GUESS WHAT? I nearly fainted the first time I got it done last year. lol.

But no, I've never heard of negative attitudes re: pierced ears other than "I've never had it done, seems potentially painful."

I don't even know of negative attitudes to more than one ear piercing. Pierce your ears all you want, as long as the piercings are only in the ears and you aren't wearing gauges, it seems pretty acceptable. I know lots of people with rows of three piercings.

 

[iLander]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Hi Amber (how are you, lady? ) On boy's earrings:

My DD's ex-boyfriend had both ears pierced and wore giant CZ's.

In my generation, for boys, it was left ear for straight, right ear for gay.

I'm still not sure what he was trying to "say", if anything. DD said it doesn't mean anything now. Rappers wear one or both, or none, or several or whatever. Because of that, regular guys wear whatever.

I preferred the old way, communication is a good thing.

 

[AprilBaby]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

If pierced ears are common then I am VERY common, I have three in each ear.

 

[Circe]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Nope, never encountered it - my parents are old world European, and though they made me wait till I was 10 to pierce mine (which I actually like - I was old enough for it to be a choice and a treat!) and loathed the idea of multiple piercings, even they weren't ethnically averse or objecting in class principles, at least insofar as I am aware. It just didn't mesh with their aesthetic. Of course, neither do most of my choices, so, hey! Consistency.

I've actually always liked how multiple piercings look, but I felt constrained by knowing I'd be looking for an academic job, so I didn't get any additional piercings until I was in my 30s. So glad I did! Makes me feel like what other people see when they look at me is more in line with who I actually am.

 

[kenny]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

In my generation, for boys, it was left ear for straight, right ear for gay.

I remember a saying about men and earrings, "Left is right, and right is wrong."
At my advanced age I have no idea if anyone gives a hoot which ear is pierced.

 

[ChristineRose]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

My mother's family did not wear any jewelry (besides a wedding band) or makeup. Neither my mother or aunt wear jewelry to this day. Some of my aunts by marriage do. I was taught that jewelry was, if not exactly immoral, wasteful and selfish.

I have never gotten my ears pierced. It's a hassle. You have to worry about infections, about allergies (a big deal for me), about sleeping and showering, and you have to wear at least studs every day or they close up. I don't think I was ever told that pierced ears were common, but I was told that they were overly worldly, selfish, unhealthy, and just generally not worth it.

 

[yssie]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I had mine pierced at three. In my culture the norm is to have a baby girl's ears pierced at the end of her first year - there's usually a big celebration but my dad was on the other side of the world... so my parents decided to wait.

If we have girls we'll have their ears pierced at one. I'm confident some people will judge us poorly for it and they're welcome to whatever opinions they fancy so long as they don't voice them anywhere these hypothetical daughters might overhear

 

[Madam Bijoux]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I've never heard any negative comments about pierced ears.
I admit I don't understand why anyone would want to wear ear gauges, but to each his own.

 

[TC1987]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

In my generation, for boys, it was left ear for straight, right ear for gay.

I remember a saying about men and earrings, "Left is right, and right is wrong."
At my advanced age I have no idea if anyone gives a hoot which ear is pierced.

Men wear two earrings now. I have never endeavored to ask any what it means. Whatever it is, I really don't want to know.

 

[TC1987]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

The thread title made me whoop with laughter. My mother was adamantly opposed to my getting my ears pierced. She insisted that if it was to be done, it had to be done by a doctor, and she was not going to pay for that.

So, when I went college, I went to some store, might have been Claire's if those existed way back then. And I bought self-piercing hoops. Does anyone remember those? They were a wire hoop with a loop at one end, and the other end was just the wire sharpened to a point. You'd put them on and work them a bit for a few days or so, and they'd pierce the ear lobe. Then just leave them in until the ears healed up. I had no problems.

I hate clip-on earrings with a passion. They make my ears heart. They are so bad, they give me migraines. There is no way that I'd wear clips. The ones wit the screw backs are not as bad, but not great, either. Pierced is the only way to fly.

 

[iLander]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

In my generation, for boys, it was left ear for straight, right ear for gay.

I remember a saying about men and earrings, "Left is right, and right is wrong."
At my advanced age I have no idea if anyone gives a hoot which ear is pierced.

I also remembered that saying, but I didn't want to inadvertently offend our gay forum members.

I decided that I could make my point without offending people.

Hint. Hint.

 

[VRBeauty]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

My mother's family did not wear any jewelry (besides a wedding band) or makeup. Neither my mother or aunt wear jewelry to this day. Some of my aunts by marriage do. I was taught that jewelry was, if not exactly immoral, wasteful and selfish.

I have never gotten my ears pierced. It's a hassle. You have to worry about infections, about allergies (a big deal for me), about sleeping and showering, and you have to wear at least studs every day or they close up. I don't think I was ever told that pierced ears were common, but I was told that they were overly worldly, selfish, unhealthy, and just generally not worth it.

Christine: I'm not trying to dissuade you from your decision re piercing your ears, but I do want to point out that three out of four of your concerns are, for most people, issues only until the piercings heal. My ears have been pierced for years and I have zero concerns about infections (even trying on earrings in stores), showering, or going a day or even a week without earrings. When a lobe piercing is done with properly sterilized equipment, and the piercing is cared for properly until it's fully healed, infections should not be a problem. I don't like to wear any jewelry when I sleep so that isn't an issue for me either. Alas, the allergies are probably another story...

(BTW when I first got my ears pierced, the choices were to have the piercings done by a doctor or at home. Mine were done at home by my surgical nurse mother - who nearly fainted over the ordeal! They never healed properly, probably because we were following word-of-mouth care instructions and I was too impatient to let them really heal before putting in cheap discount store earrings. Fortunately they healed without issue when I stopped wearing earrings. When I was in college I got them pierced again in a small jewelry store. This time I followed the care instructions to a T and have had trouble-free piercings ever since - and that's been quite a while! )

 

[AGBF]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

Yes, like a couple of the other women here I was brought up being told that having one's ears pierced was, "common". My mother did not have pierced ears. I did not have mine pierced (as I have said many times here on Pricescope) until I was 48.

I certainly could have rebelled in the ear-piercing department. I did in many other areas, certainly. I was told not to do many, many things that I went right out and did. Many, many, many things. But I never pierced my ears. I also never took LSD or used cocaine or did some other things that seemed highly taboo. I am sure that some of the things I did do were more shocking than those things, but as kenny says, people vary. The taboos I really incorporated into my personality from my parents were probably some insane mixture of things. For instance: they told me not to hitchhike and I did. They taught me not to steal and I never stole anything-even a piece of gum-from a store in my life.

So I never had common pierced ears. Until I was 48. Then I did have them done by a doctor! Of course!

Deb/AGBF

 

[baby monster]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I don't know anyone who thinks pierced ears are common. My parents were very strict - no makeup or piercings until I turned 16. They thought jewelry and makeup were unnecessary for children but never said anything negative about pierced ears in general. My father gave me a makeup set for my 16 bday and I gave myself a gift of pierced ears. Took the money from a summer job and got my ears pierced at a jewelry store. Parents did not say a word except to ask whether the clerk wore gloves and sterilized the equipment.

 

[JaneSmith]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

By "singly pierced ears" I thought you meant just one lobe.

Yes I have encountered a negative attitude. My father. He didn't let me get it done when I was young and I finally just went and did it when I was 17 and had moved out for a time.

I also have piercings in my tragus, pinna, and navel. And a tattoo. I guess I am low class.

 

[yanaazul]

Re: Poll: Ever Encountered Negative Attitudes re. Pierced Ea

I had my first piercings when I was four. It wasn't a cultural thing -- apparently I said one day to my mother, "Mama, I want to pierce my ears please," and the next weekend she took me to the jewelers and had them done. (It will not surprise anyone that the teeny studs I picked out were blue sapphires.)

All my cousins had to wait until they were teenagers, so there was quite a bit of angst and eye-rolling. I think part of the dynamic there was that my mother was the youngest child (of eight), and on top of that, was in high school in the 60s where the next youngest sibling graduated from high school in 1959... So she was a bit of a free spirit and the indulged baby of the family, and in turn indulged me. My mom and all her sisters do have pierced ears, though, so it's not that our family thought pierced ears were tacky. Her sisters just felt four years old was a bit young to get me started!

Every girl I knew in school all had to wait until they were teenagers, as well, so I was the only classmate with pierced ears for almost a decade! I never got any bad reactions, though (besides jealousy that my mom was so cool to let me) -- the teachers generally told me my earrings were precious. The funny part was, once my classmates started getting their ears pierced at around 14 or so, I decided I wanted second piercings -- which I did myself, with a sharpened thumbtack and an eraser. I put my little sapphire studs in them, since I had kept them all those years... A few years later, I did third holes in both ears, a fourth hole in my left ear, and an helix (upper outer cartilage) piercing on my right.

I've let some close over the years, got new ones -- I now have three lobe piercings on my left, two on my right, a rook piercing on the left, and a tragus ring and helix ring on the right. I work in a corporate job -- senior manager -- but I'm also in the California Bay Area, so no one blinks an eye. Except sometimes to ask me if I have a piercer to recommend (I do).

My husband has both ears pierced. Back in high school he had the 80s style single stud, but only for a few months, he got tired of fighting with his parents about it. It wasn't until we were in our mid-30s that he decided he wanted to pierce his ears again. I told him I had two preferences: no tacky fake bling, and it had to be both ears. One ear gives me flashbacks to cheesy 80s pop stars! He didn't disagree, actually, we're both into punk rock and the plain stainless rings in both ears is very common. So that's what he has. He also has a corporate job, but again, Bay Area... A single ring in each ear is understated!