Find your diamond
Find your jewelry
shape
carat
color
clarity

OK out with it MonkeyPie!

Status
Not open for further replies. Please create a new topic or request for this thread to be opened.

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
I wanna know some details and I''''m not too shy to ask....
How does this work for you? I couldn''''t do it personally but only because I''''d get way too jealous, and luckily for me so would my fiancee. But I''''ve always found it so intriguing, considering that monogamy IS such a hard thing for a lot of people. (Not me, but I see lots of marriages failing because they couldn''''t handle it). How do you curb the jealousy?
 

Bia

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 28, 2008
Messages
6,181
Kelli, you get props...

MP: d.i.s.h.
 

platinumrock

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2005
Messages
2,238
MonkeyPie, you are one brave women for spilling. You don''t have to divulge the details if you don''t want to.
 

ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 30, 2007
Messages
4,553
*grabs popcorn* I want to hear, too!
 

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
Date: 4/6/2009 11:02:28 PM
Author: platinumrock
MonkeyPie, you are one brave women for spilling. You don''t have to divulge the details if you don''t want to.
Hey come on now... She said we could start a new thread and ask her about it!

But in all seriousness... I''ll totally understand if you don''t want to say anything. No biggie
 

platinumrock

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2005
Messages
2,238
Date: 4/6/2009 11:03:00 PM
Author: ladypirate
*grabs popcorn* I want to hear, too!
LOL...

I don''t know why this feels kinda wrong. Is this even appropriate on PS?

*closes the curtains and turns off the lights*
 

MonkeyPie

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
6,059
Date: 4/6/2009 11:00:28 PM
Author:Kelli
I wanna know some details and I''m not too shy to ask....
How does this work for you? I couldn''t do it personally but only because I''d get way too jealous, and luckily for me so would my fiancee. But I''ve always found it so intriguing, considering that monogamy IS such a hard thing for a lot of people. (Not me, but I see lots of marriages failing because they couldn''t handle it). How do you curb the jealousy?
And here I thought no one would have the guts to ask lol.

I will admit, before my husband, I would have NEVER considered this. I was the epitome of the jealous girlfriend, and as it turned out, I had good reason to be, because they all bailed on me/cheated. It really depends on the person you are with and the type of personality you are. Even as much as I trusted him, it took awhile for me to be happy to see him go out with his guy friends, much less go out with somebody else! It''s a discussion we have had many times, and it isn''t because either one of us has found somebody we want to see "on the side." It just came up, usually during our silly moments.

Like I mentioned on the other thread, though, neither of us has actually done it. It made a HUGE difference in the frequency/quality of the bedroom activities, though, which after a year were slipping downhill because we both often came home tired and ready to relax in other ways. Monogamy is not difficult for me or for him, it''s simply a fun thing that we like having the option of doing. It basically leaves the door open for a lot of harmless flirting, too, rather than anything else that could be considered more serious.
 

Bia

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 28, 2008
Messages
6,181
I think it's awesome that you are both so open with one another. I tip my hat to you
 

MonkeyPie

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
6,059
Date: 4/6/2009 11:09:26 PM
Author: Bia
I think it''s awesome that you are both so open with one another. I tip my hat to you
Thanks!


And here I thought I''d get a bunch of, "WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?" kind of comments. That''s pretty much all I have received from my more, ahem, conservative friends.
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
I dig it, MP.

FF and I are kind of "open" also. Just in a different way.
 

ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 30, 2007
Messages
4,553
I can see where you''re coming from--it''s not even so much actually doing it as the idea that it''s an option and therefore every time you guys
you''re choosing each other over everyone else, as opposed to having no choice.

K has to share my snuggles with the kitties, but I don''t think that''s quite the same.
 

ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 30, 2007
Messages
4,553
Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM
Author: elledizzy5
I dig it, MP.


FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.
Oh??? Spill!
 

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
Wow. Good for you guys for making that work. It''s so funny that you have an open marriage and neither one of you has taken advantage of it. I actually think that''s a really cool situation you have going on. The fact that you are both still choosing each other even though there are no "rules" about not being with anyone else is really cool, and very much validates why you chose each other in the first place.
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM

Author: elledizzy5

I dig it, MP.



FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.

Oh??? Spill!
Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.


*ducks and runs*
 

ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 30, 2007
Messages
4,553
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM

Author: ladypirate

Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM


Author: elledizzy5


I dig it, MP.




FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.


Oh??? Spill!

Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.



*ducks and runs*
Ooh la la! I''m actually impressed that it works for you guys--please don''t feel obligated to answer, but do you guys usually know the...ahem...3rd party ahead of time? Does that make it awkward afterward? Or do you get together with the same friends over and over?

I must admit, I''m fascinated!
 

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM
Author: elledizzy5
I dig it, MP.


FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.
Oh??? Spill!
Yes, please do!!!

LOL leave it to me to open the dirty thread!
Sorry conservative pricescopers...
 

platinumrock

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2005
Messages
2,238
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM
Author: elledizzy5


Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM
Author: ladypirate


Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM

Author: elledizzy5

I dig it, MP.



FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.

Oh??? Spill!
Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.


*ducks and runs*
Rrrrrrr!!!


You go girl!
Kudos to all the ladies who are secure enough to be open to possibilities.
 

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM

Author: elledizzy5

I dig it, MP.



FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.

Oh??? Spill!
Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.


*ducks and runs*
Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr is right!!!
 

MonkeyPie

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
6,059
Date: 4/6/2009 11:14:35 PM
Author: Kelli
Wow. Good for you guys for making that work. It''s so funny that you have an open marriage and neither one of you has taken advantage of it. I actually think that''s a really cool situation you have going on. The fact that you are both still choosing each other even though there are no ''rules'' about not being with anyone else is really cool, and very much validates why you chose each other in the first place.
That''s exactly how I feel about it, too. It just makes me love him more!

And elle, I have always wondered about "knowing" the 3rd party too. I know none of my friends would even consider it, but some of his friends might, and I always wonder what it would be like to be around them later...lol.
 

CJ2008

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 31, 2006
Messages
4,750
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM

Author: elledizzy5

I dig it, MP.



FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.

Oh??? Spill!
Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.


*ducks and runs*


hahaha

Well - good for you that you can do that. I''d be way too jealous and insecure I think.

Are you ever afraid at all that one of you might not want to share any more and the other will still want to?
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Date: 4/6/2009 11:17:28 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM

Author: elledizzy5

Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM


Author: ladypirate


Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM



Author: elledizzy5



I dig it, MP.





FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.



Oh??? Spill!


Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.




*ducks and runs*

Ooh la la! I''m actually impressed that it works for you guys--please don''t feel obligated to answer, but do you guys usually know the...ahem...3rd party ahead of time? Does that make it awkward afterward? Or do you get together with the same friends over and over?


I must admit, I''m fascinated!
Right after the first time was awkward, not gonna lie. I didn''t know how to react to it, and it weirded me out a bit, but we all sat down and talked about it, how we felt, and if the four of us would be comfortable with it happening again. It''s been the same couple consistently, and we know them well (They''re married)

We''d might be open to other couples, but it would have to be someone we know and trust.

A lot of times its just a lot of flirting back and forth on both sides, and sometimes goes further. The only thing I don''t like about it is sometimes I wonder if them wanting to "hang out" with us is really code for something else. It''s hard to tell the other couple you have "have a headache" KWIM?
 

Miscka

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 9, 2007
Messages
1,938


Glad I didn''t miss this thread! Good for you guys for doing whatever works for you! Very interesting.
 

MonkeyPie

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
6,059
Date: 4/6/2009 11:22:52 PM
Author: elledizzy5
A lot of times its just a lot of flirting back and forth on both sides, and sometimes goes further. The only thing I don''t like about it is sometimes I wonder if them wanting to ''hang out'' with us is really code for something else. It''s hard to tell the other couple you have ''have a headache'' KWIM?
LMFAO! Oh dang, I never thought of that.
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Date: 4/6/2009 11:20:18 PM
Author: CJ2008
Date: 4/6/2009 11:15:31 PM

Author: elledizzy5


Date: 4/6/2009 11:13:52 PM

Author: ladypirate


Date: 4/6/2009 11:12:22 PM


Author: elledizzy5


I dig it, MP.




FF and I are kind of ''open'' also. Just in a different way.


Oh??? Spill!

Eh... instead of sending one another out on their own.. we bring the fun home.. and share.



*ducks and runs*



hahaha


Well - good for you that you can do that. I''d be way too jealous and insecure I think.


Are you ever afraid at all that one of you might not want to share any more and the other will still want to?
My FF and I pride ourselves on our communication. We both know that if/when it happens, it must be consensual for both of us, no pressure, and if someones says no, it''s no. We have that understanding with the other couple as well.

We made it clear to one another that if someone gets uncomfortable, we''re done. End of story. It''s supposed to be fun and adventurous. When one of us doesn''t enjoy it anymore, it ends.
 

Kelli

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
5,455
elledizzy I''m not gonna lie that sounds like a pretty fun time, if you have the right couple around. My FH would probably flip if he even knew I said that.
I''m sure I could never even go through with it anyway, but having that option open must make for interesting weekend get-togethers!
 

MonkeyPie

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
6,059
Date: 4/6/2009 11:27:09 PM
Author: Kelli
elledizzy I''m not gonna lie that sounds like a pretty fun time, if you have the right couple around. My FH would probably flip if he even knew I said that.
I''m sure I could never even go through with it anyway, but having that option open must make for interesting weekend get-togethers!
Would he really? Do you think it''s the same jealousy issue that most women (more openly) would admit to, or is it just not wanting to share? I''ve always kind of thought guys would be STOKED if their lady agreed to such a thing lol. Or maybe it''s just the younger skanky guys lol.

I have always thought another couple would be really fun. We just haven''t met one I''d be interested in doing that with.
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Date: 4/6/2009 11:27:09 PM
Author: Kelli
elledizzy I'm not gonna lie that sounds like a pretty fun time, if you have the right couple around. My FH would probably flip if he even knew I said that.
I'm sure I could never even go through with it anyway, but having that option open must make for interesting weekend get-togethers!
LOL, yeah it really is fun. I mean, obviously that fantasy is not for everyone, but I've always been curious, and I am glad that I tried it.

It's fun because it takes a stable relationship and puts that spark of dating someone new back in your life. Like...when you meet someone you like, and you wonder if they like you back? If they'll kiss you? It's the same feeling. It's like we're one couple dating another couple.

ETA: I'm fully aware that after this thread most of PS will never look at me the same way again.
 

Haven

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 15, 2007
Messages
13,166
I think it''s totally a jealousy issue. I would be jealous beyond belief, and I''m not usually the jealous sort.
 
Status
Not open for further replies. Please create a new topic or request for this thread to be opened.
Be a part of the community It's free, join today!
    Push Present: Engagement Ring Upgrade
    Push Present: Engagement Ring Upgrade
    20th Anniversary Upgrade
    20th Anniversary Upgrade
    Horses for Courses: Polo Match Jewelry
    Horses for Courses: Polo Match Jewelry

Need Something Special?

Get a quote from multiple trusted and vetted jewelers.

Holloway Cut Advisor



Diamond Eye Candy

Click to view full-size image.
Top