Now I really did it :((

[junebug17]

Hi girls -

will be back later but just wanted to say I was shocked and upset to look at my phone at 3 in the morning to find out Trump is our president - should not have done that, could not go back to sleep, feeling very worried and I don't feel comfortable with his judgement, personality traits, views, and feel he's incompetent - have been talking to dh, he has been reminding me there are checks in place on the President so he can't just do anything he wants and he will be surrounded by people who will keep him in line. He says people might feel better after he picks his cabinet and Chief of Staff is key, he's the gatekeeper so hopefully Trump will choose wisely. Dh said many people weren't necessarily voting for Trump but were voting against Clinton and the policies of Obama. He reminded me that 72% feel that the country is heading in the wrong direction and Trump was able to tap into that. And I think health care is a big issue for a lot of people. Dh doesn't seem panicked and said if he's bad he'll be voted out in four years. I don't know, I feel a little more calm after talking to dh but it's hard to wrap my mind around the fact that Trump was somehow able to pull this off. Very surreal and I am still worried but we have no choice but to accept the outcome and hope for the best.

 

[missy]

Hi girls -

will be back later but just wanted to say I was shocked and upset to look at my phone at 3 in the morning to find out Trump is our president - should not have done that, could not go back to sleep, feeling very worried and I don't feel comfortable with his judgement, personality traits, views, and feel he's incompetent - have been talking to dh, he has been reminding me there are checks in place on the President so he can't just do anything he wants and he will be surrounded by people who will keep him in line. He says people might feel better after he picks his cabinet and Chief of Staff is key, he's the gatekeeper so hopefully Trump will choose wisely. Dh said many people weren't necessarily voting for Trump but were voting against Clinton and the policies of Obama. He reminded me that 72% feel that the country is heading in the wrong direction and Trump was able to tap into that. And I think health care is a big issue for a lot of people. Dh doesn't seem panicked and said if he's bad he'll be voted out in four years. I don't know, I feel a little more calm after talking to dh but it's hard to wrap my mind around the fact that Trump was somehow able to pull this off. Very surreal and I am still worried but we have no choice but to accept the outcome and hope for the best.

Thanks for posting this Junie. I was panicking when I heard the news from Greg when he woke me this morning and I just got off phone with my parents and then my aunt and uncle. And they all said basically the same thing as your dh. We have to hope for the best and make the best of the situation because there is no other alternative. We are all in this together. Thank you for coming here to add calm and reason and hope. (((Hugs))).

 

[junebug17]

^I know missy, I was panicking too, and still in shock every time I think of Trump as president and I continue to be worried - but our government has a system of checks and balances so hopefully that will keep him in line - I don't know, it's not going to help to live our lives feeling worried and frightened, just trying to add some perspective to the situation.

 

[LLJsmom]

I have to put some distance between the results and me. I need to get going and go through my day and move forward. I need to be strong for my kids and my family and for being a woman and minority, both strikes against me. Well, now we know what and how more than half the country thinks. Take very good care of yourselves and your families ladies. Be strong and wise and resilient. We will have to be to get through this.

 

[CJ2008]

I went to run some errands this morning and I was desperately looking for signs from people that they felt as desperate as I did. I wanted to catch someone's eyes, anyone, and have a moment of understanding.

But everyone looked business as usual.

DH told me many of the same things yours did june - but still, I have tears in my eyes and a knot in my stomach that is making it uncomfortable to breathe almost. It's like I'm all compressed.

Let's see what happens.

But now all his supporters and all the people who said we needed change will get their change.

I hope he turns out to be the biggest (good) surprise of my lifetime. But I doubt it - he has shown us his true colors throughout and that isn't going to change.

ETA I gave in to asking the wife of DHs best friend who she voted for. I was scared to but I said "no way, no way she voted for him." Well, I was wrong. I have to admit, I like her less when I heard her answer. I don't even want to talk to her right now. I know I'll have to get over that but that is how I feel right now.

ETA2 I read somewhere that it might be a good idea to cash out of stocks. I have a few (all of which tanked) - what kills me is that for other reasons I was going to sell a portion a couple of weeks ago. Now they're way lower. But still, I don't want to do anything panicky and based on fear. Are you guys dealing with any of this or what do you plan on doing?

 

[Calliecake]

CJ, You are not alone in any of your feelings. I feel exactly the same. Put appears the initial shock is wearing off in the market. The market is doing better now. I also am having a heard time with all of this and am feeling sick. Trump has shown us all exactly who he is and people voted him in. I think those saying the voted for the party and not him are not being honest. How do you vote for someone who has his values? He is a terrible human being.

 

[MarionC]

Obama and Clinton are taking the higher road
All we can do is follow their example

I will try to do that except I don't think I will every have anything to say to my sister, a Trump supporter, for the rest of our lives.
...........
Hanging curtains in the attic room and drinking Baileys.
Can't wait to have Internet and join you "for real"
Takes 5 minutes to download a page
Remember when that was as good as it could get?

Ah you guys are probably too young to remember that.)
..........

It is sad to have a crude unprincipled person representing us in the world
Finally we totally prove to the world that indeed we are ugly Americans

It is interesting that this big change is happening elsewhere too

Peace, my friends.

 

[azstonie]

Mind blowing.

And in Arizona recreational pot also failed on the ballot, which is too bad because people are going to need more options than just ALCOHOL to live through what's coming

 

[azstonie]

I'd rather have Kim Kardashian as president than Trump, if our choices are now going to be reality TV stars.

Khloe is okay too. Jeff Probst from Survivor, well okay.

 

[Calliecake]

Too funny Kristie! Although I must admit I feel like we are all living in a survivor episode.

 

[rainwood]

A long full day at the office which is probably good. I think I'll just spew out my thoughts.

How did this happen? I'm no expert, but even I can point to a lot of things:
1. A primary system that starts with the caucus method in conservative states which tend to give really conservative candidates early momentum;
2. A Republican party that has catered to the evangelical right for a long time, co-opting what was a fiscal conservative/business friendly viewpoint and moderate Republicans not trying or not feeling able to take their party back;
3. People who think they should be at the top of the social order because they are male or white or rich or religious and uncomfortable that they felt like they weren't at the top anymore;
4. People who want a life like back in the 50's or 60's, blaming women and immigrants for their stunted prospects when the real cause was the GOP's many decades of supporting corporate interests instead of people and the desire for corporations to increase their grown and profits at the expense of people and the country they live in;
5. A press that has either been co-opted to the right (Fox, WSJ, etc.) or decimated by the digital onslaught and have forgotten or can't afford to practice real journalism;
6. A lot of people, many of them young, who haven't lived through this before and don't think it matters if they vote, who's in office, or confusing liking something on FB, retweeting or taking videos on their phones as taking real action for change
7. An election season that lasts way too long, costs too much, and is designed to focus on simplistic and insignificant issues because they're easy to talk about, especially in sound bites.

And that's probably only a few of the reasons.

As for the future, I'm not sure our system of checks and balances works when the Republicans not only control Congress, the White House, and the Supreme Court but are controlled by a bunch of super right-wing people who don't care about the damage they cause. The government shutdown is an example of that. I see the only check as a few Republicans in the Senate not willing to go along if it gets really extreme.

I suspect we're in for a rocky and difficult ride. Trump doesn't have any experience or knowledge about the job he is now going to have. The campaign showed both that he was shockingly ignorant about much of this country and the world, and didn't seem too interested in educating himself. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior so I doubt his level of ignorance and interests are going to change much. That means much of the work of being the president will be done by others, with Trump involved only in the stuff he's interested in. My guess is that the stuff he'll be directly involved in is probably 10% or less of what someone like Obama would have been doing. The rest will be done by unelected functionaries filling in the vacuum behind the scenes. That wouldn't be so bad if he were surrounded by smart and competent people, but I suspect that most Republicans will avoid the West Wing if they're members of Congress because they get to run everything now and because they mostly care about their own careers and don't want to risk that if the Trump presidency turns into a complete sh*# show. So it will be mostly Repbulicans who don't have anything else to do. The NYT says Guiliani, Christie, and Gingrich may be likely picks and I suspect most of those surrounding him will be people like that who have nothing to lose. It's their chance to get back into power and the spotlight. And I don't think those kind of people are any kind of balance. They're a bunch of sexist, missogynistic hotheads, much like their future boss, and don't have the expertise he really needs.

My hope is that he's surrounded by such a group of backbiting, infighting, power hungry, dysfunctional buffoons, they prevent his administration from getting much done beyond what a Republican Congress would do anyway. I worry most about two things: the Supreme Court and foreign policy because they have ramifications that last a lot longer than four years. The Supreme Court will go back to 5-4 conservative and maybe more if several of the liberal justices die or retire. As for foreign policy, I suspect Trump will make a number of blunders around the globe, the consequences of which will sometimes happen quickly and sometimes will only blow up years from now. I wouldn't be surprised if he started another terrible and pointless war like Bush's Iraq and cozied up to Russia so Syria and the rest of the Middle East can continue to implode. Europe will have to grapple with an even larger refugee migration. And Trump is just not internationally savvy enough to come out on top in negotiations with either Putin or China, and he's too narcissistic to realize it. That's a terrible, terrible combination.

What do we do? My guess is that Gen X and millennials and minorities will be the key. It's their future that's really at stake. And maybe that is as it should be. They want the boomers to get out of the way. Then step up to fix it and step up big. Get politically involved, transform the media so it's effective again, start changing people's minds about key issues. That's what us flower children of the 60's did. Granted, it's easier to get riled up to protest when half of your generation has to register for the draft and could get sent to Vietnam to be killed or maimed, but there's enough at stake right now to fight for. It's a question of if the people likely to be most affected will do that. If not, it will probably take my generation and the generation ahead of me to die off in sufficient numbers and for people of color to increase their numbers enough that they are no longer minorities but the majority.

Unless Trump totally craters the stock market or eliminates Medicare, I can ride out 4 or even 8 years without too much direct impact. The need for reproductive freedom is moot for me because of age, I have employer-provided health insurance until I retire, I'm financially okay, I don't have to rely on a job to live. But I am going to do a few things differently. I'm reconsidering my cash position. If the stock market recovers enough, I will probably switch some more over to cash, maybe into some grade A short-term bonds. I will probably also reduce my discretionary spending until I know I can do that. No diamonds for me, and I will likely put the attic conversion on hold if the market doesn't bounce back soon enough that I can sell some equity funds without taking a loss. I'm hoping I'm wrong, but if the market goes wonky because of the uncertainty or we're plunged into recession again, I want enough cash to live on for a few years so I don't need to sell at a low rather than a high. The problem with all this is that if lots of people do that, we will head back into a recession.

The one thing I won't do is move. If you care about something, you stay and fight for it. Besides, if America plunges into trouble, Canada probably gets drags in with us. Oil saved them last time, but oil isn't doing as much for them now and probably won't if there's a recession. Plus, many of the benefits like health care aren't something we'd be eligible to get for a long time. And they spend way too much time worrying about hockey. I have enough Canadian relatives to know!

Sorry if this sounds bleak. This is kind of what happened with Reagan, although worse. This is not the end of America, but it certainly is a test of America.

 

[MarionC]

I got a report from Northern Trust Bankthis morning stating that "the republican sweep should boost economic growth ".
That sounds promising but what about those who said a trump win would cause a long term global recession?
I don't understand any of this, Rainwood
Let's hope northern trust is right
And let's hope trump is smarter that he has appeared this past year

 

[marcy]

Hi NIRDIs!

I think everyone of us is quite surprised at how the election turned out. I’ve been reading opinion columns online tonight. Lots of different points of views out there to think about and it looks like very few people saw this coming.

June you said almost verbatim what I thought. Trump isn’t our dictator, we have checks and balances in place and mid-term elections are in 2 years. Trump must have been successful running lots of large businesses to get where he is and they say he surrounded himself by smart, capable people who knew what they were doing so I don’t see why he would run his presidency any differently. I am hoping for the best.

One of the great things about being an American is you can have different opinions and viewpoints and we can always get out there and try to change things we disagree with.

Gypsy, I hope your kidney infection clears up quickly.

Jimmianne, glad to hear from you and how fabulous you are enjoying being busy working on the house. That is awesome DD stayed to help and has “claimed” the top floor for her and her BF. Mm to drinking Baileys. When I first loaded my astronomy class online we had 24K dial up modems. It would take me forever to loaded up one html and then the modem would crash. After we got high speed internet it was like transferring a file from your desktop to my documents. Such progress! Let’s hope the bank is right. If the economy doesn’t improve republicans will not win in the next election.

Missy, I see a low of 12 degrees in our forecast so my winter coat will be coming out soon too. Winter is approaching quickly. I’m sure you look great in your winter coat and I know you have a lot of cute boots to wear with your coat. I saw where the markets dropped over night but luckily they finished on the + side today. Great pictures of your kitties.

Scandi, do you see northern lights from your cabin? Good reason for me to come visit.

Kristie, I saw quite a few state legalized recreational pot. I am surprised Arizona didn’t pass it.

Hi CJ, Callie and LLJsmom.

We stayed up until almost midnight watching election results which were still undecided when we turned the TV off. I looked at about 3:30 and was quite shocked to see how it turned out. I couldn’t go back to sleep.

I was way busy at work today but the day zipped by. I met a friend for lunch. The service was awfully slow so I ended up being gone for almost 2 hours but I didn’t care since I worked until 7 last night.

I have nothing to take in for lunch tomorrow so I think I’ll sneak out of work again.

It’s true - I had a Curby incident today. I rubbed about 5/8 inch of my rim on the corner of a curb. I was SO mad!

Laters,
Curby

 

[rainwood]

And I wore all black to work today. First time ever. I'm in mourning for the America I thought I lived in.

 

[Gypsy]

And I wore all black to work today. First time ever. I'm in mourning for the America I thought I lived in.

((HUGS))

We've been grieving too here. Yesterday was a death of hope in humanity and hope for our country.

John and I took today to grieve as well. I had a panic attack, almost threw up, and am now numb on klonzapam.

This is nothing like the Gore/Bush election loss. That was disappointing. This... this is something different entirely.

 

[Scandinavian]

Good morning girls

From my little corner of the world, people are saying that a lot of Americans must be worse off than we thought to choose to vote as they did. Here, the slogan that is all over Instagram etc is "Michelle for president 2020".

On the plus side, mr T can only be a positive surprise, he can't possibly be any worse than he seems.

Moving on.

Marcy, no, I'm afraid not. No northern lights from any of our places. But we do have a *spectacular* view of the stars from both our home and cabin (no city lights to ruin it). And I can take you to see it, off course. But that’s a little plane trip away, or a long car ride. If all the NIRDIs come, we can make it a road trip Oh no curby... that is.. not fun.

Gypsy, I'm sorry you are sick and that you have so much trouble with the health insurance etc. That really is too bad. How are you feeling today?

Missy, any updates from HRH? She is not happy, I guess My little furbaby was so upset that she needed to sleep in our bed tonight.. LOL. (Or, it might be that she had curled up before my DH went to bed, and because he did not turn on the light because he thought I was sleeping already, he did not see her curled up on my side of the bed... She keeps me company if he works late, and then he will tell her to leave when he goes to bed, but she is getting smarter. Instead of taking his place, she had just curled up at my feet.. )

Rainwood, I really hope it does not affect the economy and stock markets. We don't need that now, the oil price is bad enough as it is. Here, the low oil prices really affects the markets and the economy for a lot of people, because there is a lot of industry and companies that are servicing the oil sector.

Jimmianne, from my limited knowledge, it can go either way. Import taxes would probably hit American companies hard, because a lot of them have production in low cost countries. A war would increase oil prices and boost the economy as long as it is in a far away place.. (horrible). Uncertainty always throws markets, even if only for a little while.

I really do recommend a political system where the "president" is just the head of the party, and doesn't really have any real powers..

Then again, democracy is to blame for it all (dark humour, so yes, a joke coming up) - after all, half of the population is below average intelligent, so why let them decide anything...? To quote Winston Churchill "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter."

Gypsy, I like the link you posted in that other thread about 6 reasons why T won. I will not write his name. My plan is to ignore him - and his family.

CJ, hope you are feeling better. There really *is* supposed to be a fail proof system of checks and balances in the US, or at least that is what they teach us at school...

June, it is after all only 4 years. I support your view. There is no other way than to hope for the best. At least you only have T, we have Putin "next door". Always a silver lining..

Kristie, good one! But I really think you should perhaps rather go with Judge Judy if your choices are limited to reality stars..

Jimmianne, love to hear from you, I'm so exited about you fixing that house of yours

Callie, it is going to be OK. You girls are proof enough that the US does have a lot of fantastic people, and surely there must be some in Congress etc as well

I wasn't going to talk about the election. Didn't go so well..

Hugs to all!!

 

[Scandinavian]

This is how my baby looks when thinking about it - let us sleep until it's over..

 

[missy]

Good morning girls.

Rainwood, thank you so much for answering all my many questions. I really appreciate you taking the time and energy to discuss this painful topic and share your insight and wisdom. Yesterday I was in shock all day. Work was a blur and on top of it all I did some damage to my toenail because I was so upset yesterday morning I was careless. That is just icing on the cake. My friend the podiatrist was at work yesterday and tried to help me and did some cutting to try preventing more damage but time will tell if it heals or if I need something more invasive to be done. I was thinking about Trump as I was cutting my toe nails before work yesterday and that was a mistake.

Anyway, I just didn't get how everyone was functioning so smoothly yesterday. I felt too like it was a death of all our hopes and dreams for the future all day yesterday and yet people were laughing, talking, smiling and going about business as usual. On the train during my commute in yesterday AM I looked at each face searching for signs of despair and sadness. I saw nothing. Everyone looked calm. My mind was racing yet everyone else seemed "normal". I didn't get it. Especially because NY voted Clinton. As did NJ. Both of "my" states voted the humane choice. The fair choice. The logical reasonable about time choice. The electoral college has outlived its usefulness and it needs to be gone. At least go to something like the system Maine has which from my understanding is a more fair electoral college sort of like a popular vote combined with the electoral college. We need to get to a voting system that represents the people of this country in a more balanced fair manner.

Oh and I wore black yesterday too. But that's because I love wearing black and it makes me feel better and it fit my mood (and still does) to a T. So I think it might be black again today. Plus it is thinning. Sorry I couldn't resist. I need humor to cope with tragedy if I am to get through this.

And I hope we will as a country and as a people get through this. I refuse to throw in the towel and give up. OK the country, the people made a mistake during this election. It cannot be a fatal forever doomed mistake. At least I hope and pray it isn't and it is one we will get through and recover from because if I don't believe that then I want to do the opposite of what you wrote Rainwood. And I want to buy a big fat diamond to soothe my fears and anxiety because what's the point of saving anyway if we are doomed right? But no, I will hold steady.

Not selling the stocks or investments and hoping the economy will hold and that we will survive and thrive despite the lunacy that will be in the White House. To think I used to like Giuliani makes me ill because I see the error in my thinking with him and I do not like him or his misogynistic racist behavior anymore. And I won't even mention my thoughts on Gingrich or Christie. Wow. But I am still hoping somehow we will be OK. We all need to hold strong and work together or there is no hope so truly we have no alternative but to buck up and all work together. I sure hope our Supreme Court will be OK and that women's (and other important) rights don't take a hit.

Marcy, thank you for your encouraging words and support throughout the day yesterday. I was in a big fat gloomy funk and your positive words helped. Oh no to your curby accident but I am glad it was minor. 12 degrees arggghhhh. I sure hope that cold stays away from here but I know it is coming. I think we will be in the 30's on Saturday and it will be windy so our windchill won't be far behind your temps. Too early for me.

Jimmianne, I hope what you read is right about the economy. I am glad you are enjoying being at your French Chateau. You couldn't have chosen a better time to get away.


Gypsy, I hope you are somehow feeling better. There are no words to cheer anyone up except to maybe just hope against hope we will all be OK. I am sending healing vibes your way and hope the kidney infection is on the way out.

LLJSmom, ((((HUGS)))). I too am very worried about my nieces as you are your DD. It is for them that this is critical and for their future. I hope we can find a good leader in the not too far future that will make it a brighter tomorrow for everyone. Hopefully this will just be a 4 year blip on the radar and no major catastrophes will occur. Yeah as a woman right now I feel undervalued, under appreciated and sick of the status quo. Everyone with children especially daughters has to be crazy worried right now. The medical director has 3 girls and he was very unhappy too. Oh and we had a quick meeting yesterday at work and OMG a new concern I didn't even think about. He said that Trump is against FQHCs (that is what our medical clinic is designated as) and wants to get rid of them all and the medical director seems to think within 5 years that will be the end of all clinics like ours. What will happen to my undeserved patient population? What will there future be like if there is no safety net for them?

Callie, hope you are feeling better honey and that your mouth is healing. Hope you took the meds yesterday and enjoyed the frozen yogurt.

Kristie, I never saw any of the Kardashians in action but I will agree with you. However I have to draw the line at Jeff Probst from Survivor. I loathe him. So not sure he is the better choice. LOL. Hey if I don't laugh I will cry more and I am feeling all cried out right now.

CJ I don't think it is the time to cash out of stocks at all. I am no expert but my advice is to hold steady OK? If everyone cashes out not only will you lose money but the stock market will not recover. Right now it is looking hopeful re stocks so hang in there. It might be a bumpy ride for a bit but hopefully it will recover and stabilize and even grow as the years continue. This is the way the stock market works and fingers crossed it will be OK. We all just have to hang in there.

Scandi, love the latest photo of your sweet fur baby.

Try to have a good day girls. One day at a time. One foot in front of the other. And ((((HUGS)))).

 

[missy]

Tommy asking about our uncertain future with his sweet worried expression.

Thank goodness for our sweet fur babies. <3

 

[CJ2008]

Love all the kitty pictures missy. and the doggie picture scandi.

This morning when I went to pick up coffee the girl behind the counter looked at me and said "We lost."

And the other woman - an older white woman who is always high strung - said a bunch of things including "the man has no brains" and "my racist friends texted me to see if I was celebrating and I told them all to go f off." And she told me she cried yesterday. I must admit I was surprised because in my mind I had pegged her as a Trump supporter.

And two other women - one buying coffee and another one behind the counter - also said some similar things. Of course, it's possible that they just didn't want to say who they really voted for http://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/01/us/politics/white-women-helped-elect-donald-trump.html since the other 3 women in the room were expressing sadness, etc.

But the feeling from others today is more in line with what I had expected yesterday.

What it also made me realize is that I have to be careful that I don't start stereotyping in my mind who's a Trump supporter and who's not. And even - dare I say - why they voted for him or automatically assume that they must be racist. I admit I'm not there yet and will probably take me a while to get there if I can ever do it. But I want to work on having an open mind, like Obama said to have "faith in my fellow citizens."

oh and missy thanks for the feedback about the stocks...I really was in panic mode.

Hi Curby!

Hi everyone. Have a great day today.

 

[missy]

Jut finally reading some news. Sigh. Who voted for Trump.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/10/us/politics/donald-trump-voters.html

Just a snip

But Mr. Trump also won over millions of voters who had once flocked to President Obama’s promise of hope and change, and who on Tuesday saw in Mr. Trump their best chance to dampen the most painful blows of globalization and trade, to fight special interests, and to be heard and protected. Twelve percent of Mr. Trump’s supporters approved of Mr. Obama, according to the exit polls.

Hi CJ! And I agree. Everyone who voted for him is not automatically a racist or misogynist or a bad person.

 

[MarionC]

I've been getting emails from trump for months. I unsubscribed but they kept coming,
Today they were asking for "donations to build the wall".
Interesting huh,
Where does that money go in reality? People just send trump money??
I'm going to take the night off from thinking about It All.

Work continues here but I'm getting to a good place for this time here.
All the rooms are clean and cleared of unusable stuff.
New bedding in 2 bedrooms.
Took at least a full day each room. I will share photos when I get Internet service.
The work has just begun as there is a bath and a kitchen remodel ahead.
All the rooms still need painting, new light fixtures and new carpet.
But I went to a cool place Maison De Monde and got rugs, linens and little things to brighten the spaces.
It is feeling very livable and after my DD goes back to the states I'll get out of the house to do some sightseeing.

Hugs to each and every NIRDI

 

[azstonie]

Rainy, WORD. Every single paragraph of your post. Thank you.

I'm going to post below what is going on in my life right now. I haven't posted much about it because I've been distressed about it and even though we NIRDIs support each other, 'other people's problems,' right? What I am posting below is why we care about who is president, Attorney General, Governor, etc., and finally right down to your City Manager (city managers run cities, not mayors). Read it if you're bored or you want a brief respite from *your* problems
************************

In July I went out at lunchtime to get takeout pizza for DH and myself. I went into MOD Pizza and ordered 3 takeouts (their pizzas are 10' and my fave pizza is next-morning pizza). I'm carrying 3 boxes and I head for my car. There is an enormous Escalade overflowing its space into mine and I can tell its iffy if I'm going to be able to get in my car at all, and I don't want to damage my car trying to either. So I go back inside MOD, stand in the doorway and jingle my keys in the air, saying: "Black Esacalade, I'm parked in." No one says anything. So as I'm turning to leave, a man at the end of the order says: "I'm not parked wrong." I realize this guy wants an argument out of this, so I say, trying to motivate him to move the car back 2', "Your car is expensive, mine is cheap? You want me to try to get in?" He says: "I'm not leaving" and grins. Okay, a bully and a controller, time for me to leave.

I go outside and really look at how much maneuver room I have between the cars. One thing is certain, the pizzas and my computer bag have to go into my trunk. So I go to the back of my car and put them in, shut the trunk. Blasting around the back of our cars is Pizza Bully. He comes at me fast and hard, I start walking backwards from my car to prevent him from touching or running into me. He takes out his cellphone camera and starts taking pictures of my license plate. He then starts screaming about calling the police on me. He is almost nose to nose with me, his fists are clenched and his arms are twitchy and starting to windmill (in my experience, when a man looks like this, he's getting ready to throw a punch). Just when I think "I'm going to be hit," he whips around and goes to the side of his car, where I can't see him. Arizona has take-your-gun-to-church-and-college law in place and we've had a lot of road rage shootings here, so I now realize he might be getting a gun or a weapon out of his car. I start moving toward my car and the space between our cars. I unlock and open my door and he's now at the front of my car. I somehow manage to squeeze myself into my car! THANK GOD. He's really unglued now, he's jumping up and down and screaming that he is going to call the police (please, please do that right now because my cellphone is in the trunk with the pizza.) I realize the dumbest thing to do safety wise is to sit there making myself a target. I start my car, back out extremely slowly because I'm really rattled and don't want to get in an accident in the lot. I go home. I can't eat. I tell DH what happened. I tell him the police may be showing up. He says they won't, its private property (the parking lot), its a parking lot tiff, not what the police address.

45 minutes later, the police are at my door. My DH lets them in. I talk to the officer. I ask him why he is here. He says he is here because dispatch called and told him to come here. I tell him what happened in the lot. He keeps asking me if I was "heated." I told him no, the Pizza guy was the heated one. I offer to show him my car, because if I'd pounded his car like he told the 911 operator I did, my door would show that. The police officer inspects my car door, says clearly nothing happened with it/to it, and that he was 99% certain nothing more would happen (I didn't understand that comment at the time but I do now). I ask the officer if I was incorrect in leaving; he says: "No, we know him. You were right to leave." I ask the officer since they "know him," should I be alarmed that this guy will come after me now that he has my license plate information. Officer says "He has stopped here in the past."

So at the end of August, I receive notice from the state that I am being arraigned on charges of criminal damage to property. Arraignment in 10 days.

So I get a criminal defense attorney. He reviews the police report and reads my narrative of what happened. He says the police report is of note in that it lacks any documentation of damage! The cop never inspected the 'victim's' car. He wrote in the police report what the 'victim' said on the telephone. So no evidence. The police report also states that I never intended damage to the 'victim's car, that I was afraid of him and he in essence bullied/chased me into my car. So no criminal intent=no criminal damage.

SO: No evidence. No criminal act.

And yet I'm being charged and arraigned.

I ask how this can happen? Is this not AMERICA???

The attorney tells me that all this is political, that the cop clearly didn't believe there was a case there, so he didn't go out to inspect the 'victim's car or talk to him IN PERSON. Just 1 phone call. So the cop let the report go to his sargeant, who in turn let the report sit on his desk until the 'victim,' a City fire captain, put pressure on the Police Department to charge me. So the sargeant sends the case on for charging. I'm charged. I get arraigned. I pay for a criminal defense attorney. Now the file sits on the City Prosecutor's desk. She should be the one to DISMISS THE CHARGES, remember No Evidence/No intent of act. But nope, she carries it forward because SHE IS AN ELECTED OFFICIAL WHO WANTS TO BE SEEN AS SUPPORTIVE OF VICTIMS. She feels the JUDGE at trial can throw it out and take the political heat, not her.

So now I have two choices:
1. Take my case to trial.
If found innocent, I will STILL be in all databases as having been brought up on criminal charges. If found innocent, I now have to worry about Crazy Violent Fire Captain coming after my DH, who also works for the City as a geologist. Fire Captain has a key card to EVERY CITY BUILDING. My DH would be a sitting duck because if the FIre Department management find out about what he did in that parking lot, he could easily lose his job. Lose job=nuclear angry crazy man with no impulse control.

If found guilty, I pay restitution and $200 court fee; I can have the verdict set-aside by the judge when I pay the restitution because I have no prior record. I will still be in all databases as having been brought up on criminal charges.

The prosecutor also offers me, in addition to a misdemeanor compromise for as-yet unspecified restitution/extortion, a Rule 38 which means I get the bennies of misdemeanor compromise but I also pay a $200 court fee. If I disagree with what I'm being asked to pay, the judge can adjudicate the restitution deal in court. She offers me the Rule 38 up to the day of trial.

2. Pay the extortion money the city prosecutor and the victim are asking for; receive a misdemeanor compromise which means I pay restitution, no court fee, and although I'm still in databases for criminal charges, I have no record.
In October, I had $2000 in my 'kitty' to pay the extortion money. The prosecutor and 'victim' don't respond to my offer. They wait until November 1, after which time that $2000 went to pay another installment to my attorney. Now the 'victim' wants $1700 for repair to his car and rental of a luxury SUV.

And to make this even more confounding, the 'victim' has switched out the vehicles. THe car next me in the lot was a Cadillac Escalade with temporary registration/new car. The 'victim' who came after me was 5'9", probably 160-170 at most, young, in 20s. The vital statistics on the driver's license for the Fire Captain 'victim' are 6'2", 192 lbs and 45. Now I'm 5'8-3/4", I know when I'm in the presence of a guy who is 6'2, and the guy in the parking lot was my height, at that one point we were nose to nose and eye to eye.

So he's swapped out the car and who was present in the lot. Was it his son that was there getting pizza? I don't know. My attorney does not seem to know how to handle any of these two aspects.

I can't change attorneys because I've paid him in full.

So let's hear it for the US of A and all our protections that we have in place. THEY ONLY WORK WHEN THE OFFICIALS IN POWER WORK THEM.

(If I sound bitter about this, its because I am. Being extorted like this presses my victim buttons from being sexually assaulted in college. I'd love to meet this ba$tard in court with a good attorney working on this. The PD should never have brought me forward for charging (and interestingly, the officer himself did not file my charges, his supervisor did after pressure from Fire Captain). My charges should have been dismissed then by the prosecutor. So more pressing on my victimization button. My attorney who I hired, he';s not doing a good job in negotiating this with the prosecutor and he's made an error in procedure that I discovered because even though I'm only a retired environmental regulator/enforcement officer, I understand meeting mandated deadlines.)

 

[rainwood]

OMG, Kristie!!!!!! I can't believe you are having to go through this!!! I am so, so sorry. I don't even know what to say except I am so angry on your behalf. You also have the right to sue for malicious prosecution if you want, and the city could be held liable.

Do you have an ACLU branch there? Can you call them and see if they can help in some way? You were threatened and you're being prosecuted because of someone with clout at City Hall. That's so not okay it might be right up their alley.

And also, please feel free to vent about this any time. If you want to brainstorm ideas, I'm up for that too. And if there are other ways to help, I'll do whatever I can.

Sometimes I hate what this country is or has become. Especially now.

 

[azstonie]

Rainy, thank you for reading. That was very kind, as I'm guessing at day at the coal mines for you is reading material and detangling it.

I'd love to bounce an idea I have for an elegant solution to this---may I email Missy and have her forward to you later?

 

[azstonie]

My post about the car above is incomplete---the car in the lot was a new Escalade, the car claimed in the police report by the victim is a 2 year old GMC Yukon.

 

[rainwood]

Absolutely. I'm out this evening, but I can look at anything you send later tonight (I'm a night owl) or tomorrow.

 

[azstonie]

Thank you, Rainy. I meet with my lawyer tomorrow, he says he has heard from the prosecutor and its "complicated," come by the office.

This weekend I'm writing up my plan and will forward via Missy (Thank you, Missy.)

Hope you had a good time tonight.

 

[azstonie]

Scandi, I love that pic of your sweet girl

And Sir Tommy, handsome as always

 

[marcy]

Hi NIRDIs!

Hi Rainwood, Gypsy and CJ.

Scandi, that is awesome your skies are dark and starry. We used to go up to my parents cabin in the mountains and just lay outside at night and enjoy the stars. Of course in the winter you bundled up and lay on a snow machine. Ha Ha your furbaby knows to curl up at your feet so she doesn’t get shooed out of bed.

Missy, I hope your toe gets better. I didn’t even wear a jacket to work today. Even I am wondering when we’ll get some snow.

Jimmianne, your place is coming along great. I bet you are enjoying see it transform into your home.

Kristie, I hope that awful mess gets resolved soon.

I slept in 10 extra minutes. I was so excited. Little pleasures, right? I had a dentist appointment at 8 and they are right down the road.

After the dentist I stopped and had breakfast since I wasn’t in a hurry to get to work. I got to work about 10 am. The lady my boss wants to move to my department has decided she’d be happy to join my team. I suggested yesterday she talk to 2 of my employees to see what they think about the job and the 2 naysayers. They must have relieved her angst towards working with us. I am pretty excited about it because I think she’ll be a great addition to my team.

Marty ate carbs for supper so I had a great supper. He made us beef parmesan, noodles Alfredo and salad. I have some leftover for lunch too.

Have a great Friday.
Marcy