Nervous...seeking advice re: neighbor not impresed with dog

[ephemery1]

Sweetpea, not much I can add since I''m not a dog-owner, but I just wanted to say that I feel your pain about the hyper-sensitive neighbor! I live in an apartment building, so it is fairly accepted that we will hear other people once in a while. The guy next door blasts random 80s music from time to time, the woman on the other side is prone to loud hysterical laughter when she''s on the phone, and the people above me were just having some work done... so lots of hammering. But when you choose to live in an apartment, you choose to accept those things... no big deal.

Yet the people below me have called the front desk REPEATEDLY over the past two years to report that I''m making too much noise. Once they wrote me a long letter about how I should only wear slippers in my (carpeted) apartment, and keep all other shoes by the front door... apparently the sound of my footsteps on the 5 square feet of uncarpeted hallway as I head out to work each morning is just too much to bear.

The best was the time the front desk called to tell me the downstairs-neighbors had reported loud bangs coming from my apartment.... and I was 90 miles away at the time visiting my family for the weekend.

So try not to drive yourself crazy worrying about it... people will always find something to complain about... all you can do is make sure you''re truly doing your part to resolve the problem and then let it be. It''s a dog-friendly apartment and dogs bark every once in a while... IMHO this guy needs to chill out, or else move to a pet-free building.

 

[Mara]

SP I don''t think you need to crate train the dog if she will be okay baby gated in a main room or something. Then she gets some freedom, if she can look out a window and entertain herself IMO that goes a huge way in kind of keeping her mentally occupied. For me I would not necessarily feel like I *had* to crate train an adult dog unless there were severe behavioral issues or they had bathroom issues. It doesn''t sound to me like she has out of control issues, and maybe this guy is just a sensitive sallie about noise. That''s kind of why I also said well you can''t really worry too much about him, worry about what you can control, aka your dog and her issues because once you fix those then you can feel good about it for yourselves, for her sake and also for anyone else''s as well. And once you feel more confident about her getting better about separation anxiety etc, you will probably feel not so anxious about what others think as well.

One other thought is that sometimes we pen up Portia with her baby gate when we are cleaning areas of the house or similar and she is fine with it. Sure she doesn''t like not being near us when we are home but she''s used to being baby gated so she''s okay with it. So this might be another way to get the dog used to being baby gated in one or two rooms for the day, by starting it when you are at home and then giving her positive reinforcement when she is good about not barking to be let or or scratching at the gate.

Good luck!

 

[Demelza]

From everything you''ve described, I don''t hear anything that makes me think your dog is unreasonably or unfairly disruptive. Yes, it''s annoying to be awoken in the middle of the night and it wouldn''t be right if it were a regular occurence, but if it''s only happened twice in a month that she''s barked for less than a minute sometime during the night, I hardly see what the big deal is. Similarly, if she scratches at the door for a few minutes after you leave, I fail to see how that is hugely distracting for this man. He does live in a building that allows dogs and that requires some degree of tolerance on his part. If he can''t tolerate ANY kind of noise disruption, he should either move to a building that doesn''t allow dogs or to a house with plenty of space on either side. It is possible, of course, that her behavior while you''re gone is more severe than you realize and that some crate training might do her some good. One way to find out how much noise she''s actually making in your absence would be to get a voice activated tape recorder. This was suggested to me by a dog trainer when I got a complaint about Howard. In my case, Howard was in fact being unreasonably disruptive while I was gone (and sometimes while I was home). I know firsthand how awful it is to get a complaint from a neighbor. As a considerate and responsible person, you don''t want to think that you are in any way being unfair to your neighbors. I think it''s good you''re taking his complaint seriously, but the mere fact that he complained does not mean it''s valid. My advice would be to find out the extent of the "problem" (if there even is one). Are there other neighbors you could ask to find out if anyone else is being disturbed? If she is, in fact, experiencing severe separation anxiety, that''s important for you to know and I would recommend contacting a trainer for some advice. If not, and she''s just acting like a dog, barking occasionally throughout the day, I''m afraid this guy is either going to have to live with it or move. Good luck!

 

[fire&ice]

We had the exact same situation when we temporarily rented an apartment EXCEPT this jerk (my Heidi never barked before Mr. Clomper trampoline in the upstairs idiot) complained to the apartment people. I think the guy was giving you the heads up instead of alerting the apartment people. The apartment people were very nice, left a note & suggested we crate her while we were gone. We did. We put her in a room with good sound absorbtion and put a towel over the sides. She did just fine with that & no more complaints. So, I''m speaking from experience. But, yes, she was already crate trained - but didn''t crate until she was rehomed with her second home before us - she was about a year old - it came naturally to her.

Shutting the door to a room is never a good thing. Baby gates are an alternative - but MANY dogs just jump over itor knock it down - especially given the size of your dog. You could give it a try though. Babies are Us have a nice selection.

I wouldn''t get to worked up over this. Grad students CRAVE their sleep when they CAN. Hopefully, you new addition is getting better with each day. Just keep up with it & in a few days or a week ask the neighbor about the noise.

Good luck. It''s a rather common problem & can usually be resolved with recognition and resolution.

 

[larussel03]

Hi Mara, Demelza and Fire!

FI and I talked and we are going to attempt crating to solve the issue before it gets worse. Maybe she feels too insecure when we're gone. I'm going to order one online at Petco.com b/c they're alot cheaper than buying in the store, even with S&H. I'll also drop in on neighbor at some point and apologize and explain that we will try crating to alleviate the noise while we are gone. Hopefully him knowing we're trying will make a difference.

 

[diamondsrock]

Good luck with the crate training! Try putting a worn t-shirt of yours or your fiancee's in there with her along with something soft to lie down on. The scent of the clothing will help her relax and feel safe.
My friend's dog is 3 I think (she was a stray and she got her from the animal control officer.) She crate trained her with no problem. Of course being a stray we don't know if she was crate trained before (she didn't think so.) She put up a fuss a bit at the beginning but got used to it and like I said now sleeps in it on her own with the door open. It's her little den. Of course every dog is different but seriously my dog rarely barks when she's in the crate unless someone is at the door. She just curls up and goes to sleep, before I'm even out the door in the morning. We only keep her in there when there is nobody home but sometimes she goes in there for a nap when we're home and she needs her peace and quiet. It's like she's saying, I've got to get away from you people, I'm going to bed!

 

[phoenixgirl]

I can see both sides of the situation. It doesn''t sound like your dog has been a nuisance or has made more noise than you would expect for a recently adopted and rescued pet, but I also know what it''s like to have your sleep/concentration disturbed by neighbors. We live in a condominium where the back alley amplifies all noises, and have often been awoken by our neighbors (we recently got a white noise machine to help us drown out nuisances). One new neighbor was doing renovations starting at 6 a.m. every morning, and the condo agreement states that there should be no noise between 11 p.m. and 8 a.m. We never complained although we grumbled about it a bit. When we finally met the people, they turned out to be lovely people who immediately invited us in for a glass of wine. They explained that their contractor had gotten behind and had had to make up time by starting really early.

We often congregate on the back porch with our neighbors. On our floor, the people in three of the four units will often go outside and chat, and a few of our neighbors from below will come up and join us. It''s not as though one of us is always having noisy friends over; it''s just that we all like talking to each other (although sometimes it''s a bit much; I went outside to talk on my cell phone last week, and about three neighbors peeked out to see if I wanted to hang out . . . sometimes you just want to be outside but have time to yourself!). We received a notice from the management company recently explaining that "several residents have been congregating in the alleys" and creating noise after 11 p.m. Well, this just isn''t true. Maybe once or twice we''ve been out there after 11p.m. on a weekend, but usually it''s about 8 p.m. I am positive about this because our bedroom is right by the back door and I couldn''t go to bed if people were still out there. But obviously the complainer wasn''t justified in complaining about noise during the ok hours, so the complaint was exaggerated.

My husband never thinks ill of anyone, so he read the notice and announced that it couldn''t be us because we''re not out there that late. I pointed out that it said that "residents" plural were out there, not just the people in one unit, and that has to be us. We''re pretty sure it was the one neighbor on our landing who doesn''t join us who complained. I don''t mean to be juvenile, but she''s really a "party-pooper." We''ve always invited her out and been really nice to her, and she quit her job over the summer, so it''s not like she has to wake up early for any reason. It''s not as though there''s one noisy neighbor -- it''s just that the person below her, across from her, next to her, and diagonal from her are all friends and like to talk. Oh well, you know how the song goes . . . "Every party needs a pooper . . ."

Our solution was to get DH elected to the condo board . . . hee hee. So now there''s really no one to complain to because the board hires the management company.

Anyway, back to the grad student. I don''t think there was anything wrong with telling you that you were disturbing him. If our party pooper neighbor were to come out and say, "Look guys, I''m just really having a bad day, would you mind hanging out in somebody''s place tonight?" we would. It''s better to tell the neighbors specifically what is bothering you rather than to make a blanket complaint.

That reminds me, when I lived in an apartment complex, the walls were really thin. I could always hear the embarrassingly short squeaking of the bed above me. One time my flash-in-the-pan neighbor was upstairs on his balcony with five or six guys on a Saturday afternoon drinking beer and then throwing the bottles off the 2nd floor onto the ground where they could hit someone or shatter (nice for the children who lived in the complex). I called the management office, and they said I should call the police, so I did. The next day, the guy''s girlfriend came and told me in a snotty manner that if I had a problem with them, I should tell them, not the police. Yes, that''s right, I, a single female, should leave the safety of my apartment to approach a large group of intoxicated males who are littering and creating a safety hazard. I really need to work on being more neighborly.

 

[reader]

So, has the crate training worked? I know the ''Dog Whisperer'' recommends it, and it did help my dad''s three year old Jack Russel to not chew herself when they aren''t home...

 

[larussel03]

Date: 10/18/2006 1:30:43 PM
Author: reader
So, has the crate training worked? I know the ''Dog Whisperer'' recommends it, and it did help my dad''s three year old Jack Russel to not chew herself when they aren''t home...

So far she''s taking to it...I have a feeling that her previous owner may have crate trained her b/c she goes right in where her bed, toys are bones are and she even will sleep in there at night without a problem. I haven''t shut the door on her yet for longer than 5 or 10 mins yet...trying to ease her into it slowly so she doesnt come to hate the crate. I''ll keep everyone updated on how it goes!

 

[susi]

Just a thought....something my daugher has tried and had success with.....she was at her wits end with her dog barking.....I don''t know what it''s called but it emits a gentle shock to the dog when she barks. It''s a cause and effect type training. Our daugher says ( I have never tried this so am relying on her info ) that it didn''t take any time at all for her dog to quieten down.....she''s pleased, her neighbors are pleased....the dog is fine....no change in personality except that she just does not bark all the time anymore.

The dog is still friendly, loving, eats well, plays....just does not bark continuously anymore and I don''t think even wears the collar now at all.

Some may not feel this is right for them or their dog, but I wanted to just pass along the info.

If it were me, I''d ask my vet for advice if I were interested in trying this type of collar....

 

[WTNLVR]

We have the bark collar that we use when putting the dogs out late at night. Ours emits the shock. It works like a charm. They learned immediately not to bark when wearing the collar. There are safeguards in place so that the dog can''t get shocked too much, etc...

 

[fire&ice]

There is another "bark" collar that emits citronella every time the dog barks. Supposedly, citronella isn''t pleasant smelling to a dog & discourages the barking.

 

[divergrrl]

Check your county''s animal control laws so you know what your responsibility.

In my county, a dog who barks for longer than 5 minutes at a time is a nuisance, and I could be fined $500 if I let it go on. (I think that''s unreasonable, because it''s my opinion that dogs bark, and that 5 minutes is not a big deal....now 15 or 20? that would annoy me).

Fortunately, my dog is an inside dog, so when she runs outside & barks at the other dogs on the other side of the fence, it''s only for a minute..tops.

But....my other neighbor expressed fear upon hearing my dog bark (i am always outside with my dog---i usually stand on my deck off the kitchen while she pees, or my son & I are outside in the yard with her while we play) and I could hear her on the other side of the fence saying "OH MY GOD!!! THERE IT IS AGAIN...AAAAGH!". And she sounded truly frightened.

My first response was "oh give me a freakin'' break"....but fortunately that was only my internal monologue...my manners kicked in and I climbed up my fence & apologized for scaring her. (in my neighbor''s defense, i have a large German Shepherd, and while she''s a love, no one else knows that).

I explained that her barking at the fence is just my dog''s way of "playing" with her lab, since the can''t play for real. I assured her that I would work with her to stop it, and I also let her know that we NEVER let our dog outside and then leave. She is an indoor dog. I also told my neighbor that if she hears my dog bark, she can rest assured that either myself or my husband is outside with her, and to feel free to let us know if she still feels frightened or uncomfortable.

I then went on the Animal Control Website& found out that a dog that chases the inside of its own fence barking at the neighbors on the other side is classified a nuisance, and guess what? Punishable by $500 fine. 3 strikes and dog has to be removed from the county.

Well that just ticked me off, because, well...dogs freakin'' bark at other dogs...especially on other sides of the fence. but...the labs to my left, and the lab behind me don''t bark...but they do "race" the fence and you can hear them making happy squeaky noises, so I guess my dog is the bad one.

So my husband & I have been working with our dog (using a long training lead & pinch collar) and have eliminated some, but not all of the barking.

Like I said, we hustle her dogbutt back into the house after she potties, so it''s not longer than a minute or so.

Dogs. sheesh

Jeannine