Lykame
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2018
- Messages
- 1,473
Hello all! 
My name is Lydia, and I'm from England. I apologise in advance - I really struggle with being concise. I have essentially vomited all my feelings and thoughts into this post so it's rather long. It was therapeutic for me however!!!
A number of years ago, I inherited some money, and with it I bought a diamond ring. I have always always loved loved loved diamonds. With my own money, there always seemed something better to spend it on, but I could sort of pretend that I never had the inherited money, and it was nice to use such a gift to do something for a joyful reason. I did a lot of reading, and tried to make a really sensible purchase, but I have to admit that I made quite a few embarrassing mistakes along the way. I did learn from them, but unfortunately also paid for them.
Originally I bought a diamond called a 'Wondercut'. From memory I think it was an F, VVS1, 1.6 carat diamond (16 is my favourite number, so 1.6 was important to me). It was a designer diamond of some sort, and boy was this was a mistake. It was because I wanted a square diamond, but I did not like princess cuts, cushions etc. I had discovered a few Wondercuts that were smaller, and they were squared but looked very much like a round brilliant with the way they behaved with light. I thought they were stunning. Excited, I bought a larger one, thinking it would be perfect for me, but not realising how doing the same cut in different proportions would really change the way the diamond behaved with light. Embarrassing I know.
At that time I also designed a setting to go with it, but again I made some mistakes. I drew some pictures, but also said a lot of my preferences verbally without ever writing them down. For some reason beyond me now, I just trusted. There were certainly no CAD images or anything like that.
Anyhow, come to getting the diamond, initially I was swept away, but rapidly I realised that the larger stone looked nothing like the smaller stones. It had a 'fisheye' effect going on and I hated it. I tried so hard to like it because I loved the outer shape of the diamond, and I did lots of reading into why diamonds behave in the way they behave, but I just... hated it.
Furthermore, the setting that I got was nothing like I had asked for - I mean, I could tell it was a pretty setting, and don't get me wrong, it was like the pictures I drew, but I can't draw!!! Obviously nothing I said got translated to the person making it, which is not a surprise really is it!!!
Gosh, was I an idiot.
Let me see if I can add some pictures (note as this is not an engagement ring I do actually wear this on my right hand, but it was easier to take the pictures with it on my left):
Anyway, I had been reassured that I could change the centre diamond if I didn't like it, so I gathered up the courage and went back (not something I felt at ease doing). I asked for the centre diamond to be changed to a round brilliant. In the interests of my perceived belief that I would be peeving them off, I didn't mention how unlike what I wanted the setting was. I figured I would be better getting the central diamond to my liking and I could upgrade the setting at a later date. I didn't want to make a fuss. I hate making a fuss.
I don't get the feeling that finding a diamond in the UK (or probably really Hatton Garden) is really anything like finding a diamond in America. I was offered one or two diamonds that fit with my desire for a GIA triple excellent, F colour and carat request. By that point I wanted to be able to select based on crown angles/table and depth etc, but that was met with resistance. It felt like the ball was in their court and certainly by then I had to work with my own budget rather than inheritance money.
In the end I went for a GIA certificated, triple excellent, F, SI1, 1.65 carat round brilliant diamond with moderate fluorescence.
I loved it. I love it. It has been worth every penny of pleasure it has given me over the last few years. I left it in the original setting because I didn't want to have to go through the process of getting it reset then. Despite the issues I have with the original setting, it's not without its pleasures.
The original setting has shared prong diamonds down the side. They're about 7.5 points each, making the band maybe 3mm, or just a fraction shy of 3mm. Probably like 2.8mm or something like that. That was a really visually pleasing width for the Wondercut diamond, and I like the width on my finger, but it's a bit too wide for this stone. I do love the fact that with a shared prong setting, the only thing you see when looking at the ring from above are diamonds. I've been doing a lot of looking at pavé settings, and they seem to have visible metal as well as the diamonds, and I don't like that. With this setting, there's nearly no metal apart from the dots from the prongs and I love that. And although I feel the side diamonds are a little bit too wide for the central stone it's still beautiful from the top.
I also love the tulip type setting the central diamond is in. I really love that you can see the whole of the side of the diamond without any other metal getting in the way.
However, I do not really like the rest of the side profile of the ring. It's so frustrating. I had not realised how much time I would spend looking at the ring from the side. The side profile of the ring is so important and it's so frustrating that I don't like it! I mostly don't like the fact that the band rises up towards the central diamond (kind of like it's trying to become a cathedral setting, and I don't particularly like cathedral settings). I suspect it was a way to make the central diamond more secure considering there was no metal girdle around the central diamond supporting the prongs from that inner direction, if that makes sense. But I really dislike the fact that it gets taller towards the middle. I'm also not so sure about the textured side of the ring. I like how much metal there is, and I'm regretful that getting it reset will invariably mean less platinum... but yeah. I guess it was just difficult as it's not what I originally asked for. Thinking about it I'm not sure I would have actually liked what I originally asked for either.
Again, some pictures:
Anyhow, NOW to actually get to the point for making this post in the first place!!!
I want to upgrade. I want to slightly upgrade the central stone (focusing on light performance, really) and I definitely want to change the setting.
I'm having a few difficulties.
Firstly, although where I bought the ring from offers all that lifetime upgrade stuff, I'm not really sure that I want to go back there. I certainly wouldn't get value for money and I'm sure I would struggle to express what I wanted with them. They do however have lots of various types of stock so I would be able to try on different styles in person. But the level of service I want for the central diamond really only seems to exist in America? I want light performance etc. Bluenile.co.uk is pretty decent in terms of sourcing diamonds at reasonable prices, but I need to be able to part exchange my current ring.
I think there may be a jeweller locally who might do it for me but I'm very scared to go to them without knowing exactly what I want. I'm also on a budget and I'm scared of going to them and taking their time, and asking lots of questions, and then discovering it's not a project I can move forward with right at this moment. What's the etiquette for these things anyway?
If I could go for any of the vendors that were reputable in America I would, as there are so many amazing ones. But again I would need someone who would part exchange my current ring, and I'm scared about things like shipping. I'm also scared because I'll have to be on a reasonably sensible budget and ultimately if I can't afford what I actually want then I would have to wait. I don't want to come across as if I'm messing anyone around.
Another difficulty I'm having is that I have been obsessing about this since I got the ring in the first place. That's many years of obsessing and I'm worried that nothing will be good enough. I have browsed through thousands of settings and none of them are quite right.
Ideally I would like that tulip setting for the centre diamond to stay because I love how much of the central diamond it exposes. However I also want the band to be the same height all the the way around. In view of the fact I cannot find that combination of my current v-shaped tulip type setting and a very flat band, I suspect that there are structural integrity issues. I wouldn't want to do anything that compromised the security of the central stone. I don't know whether perhaps having thicker central prongs would solve that issue? It already makes me slightly nervous to have four prongs rather than six, but I don't really like the way six prongs looks like.
I really really like the shared prongs for the stones in the band. I've looked at lots of pavé settings and nearly none of them seem quite right, mostly because they seem to have metal visible from the top in addition to the prongs. I have on occasion wondered whether I should have the same setting as I currently have, but like... taking the setting of the side diamond furthest away from the central diamond (and therefore the shortest), make it even shorter, and have that on repeat rather than the progressive increase in height. I'm not sure. I can't find any accurate examples of that. Anything similar tends to have the central diamond 'sat on top' of the band rather than 'integrated into' the band. I really don't like when the shank is 'sat on top'.
I also need it to tolerate being put through an ultrasonic and scrubbed manually with a toothbrush. My current one copes with this just fine.
*Sighs*
The closest setting I've currently found that gives me the nicest side profile is Brian Gavin's Grace setting. Obviously that's a solitaire, so I would need to have it customised to side stones. But how I ask for those side stones to be set I don't know. They have a raised shared prong setting, but that has lots of metal visible from the top so I don't like it. And also there's a doughnut associated with that setting that would stop me from placing a band flush against it if I ever wanted to do that. Thinking I'm not 100% keen on a gap.
I just like how the band is the same thickness all the way around, how the stone is in a delicate basket type setting and well integrated into the band to make it nice and low set... it does have the metal girdle but I suspect it wouldn't be safe without it. Would it?
Also Brian Gavin is in America. I have no idea if they do part exchange. I know they do beautiful diamonds. And whatever I chose from there I would then have to do customs' tax.
There's another setting I have found that I also really really like:
This reminds me strongly of the Grace setting actually, but with diamonds down the side, and the setting on those seems nice? What sort of pavé is that? The only thing I don't like is the micropavé around the central diamond.
I suspect however that, in view of the blinding blinding lights in that video, there might be more metal visible from above than I can tell from the video.
Then of course there's the matter of the central diamond.
I don't actually want to upgrade on size. I am really attached to the fact that there is the number 16 in there. I would want another 1.6... 5/6/7/8. I dunno. Or 1.816? Haha, joking, kind of. When I was searching for my current diamond I looked at GIA F and GIA G diamonds and I could see the colour difference. They were loose diamonds to be fair but it was quite obvious. I would therefore prefer F. I want a VS1 or VS2. For fluorescence I'm not sure. I have heard that sometimes fluorescence improves light performance so long as it doesn't make the diamond cloudy. I know that fluorescence is probably a bit less expensive. But... maybe I would like less fluorescence.
In terms of cut, I want something that gives excellent light performance. I love fire. This is the most important aspect to me. In England I haven't really found any place that does light performance certification. I know that Bluenile does have some ideal diamonds with light performance certificates. They're also significantly more expensive.
I guess you can see from how much I've word-vomited why I'm struggling. At least writing this post has helped clarify a few things for me in my head anyway. Well done if you've made it this far.
I guess I'm not sure what I'm after? Some guidance? Searching etiquette? Setting ideas? Places that are highly recommended on here that would take part exchange? Any help at all would be so appreciated.
Thanks a bunch!
Best wishes,
Lydia.
My name is Lydia, and I'm from England. I apologise in advance - I really struggle with being concise. I have essentially vomited all my feelings and thoughts into this post so it's rather long. It was therapeutic for me however!!!
A number of years ago, I inherited some money, and with it I bought a diamond ring. I have always always loved loved loved diamonds. With my own money, there always seemed something better to spend it on, but I could sort of pretend that I never had the inherited money, and it was nice to use such a gift to do something for a joyful reason. I did a lot of reading, and tried to make a really sensible purchase, but I have to admit that I made quite a few embarrassing mistakes along the way. I did learn from them, but unfortunately also paid for them.
Originally I bought a diamond called a 'Wondercut'. From memory I think it was an F, VVS1, 1.6 carat diamond (16 is my favourite number, so 1.6 was important to me). It was a designer diamond of some sort, and boy was this was a mistake. It was because I wanted a square diamond, but I did not like princess cuts, cushions etc. I had discovered a few Wondercuts that were smaller, and they were squared but looked very much like a round brilliant with the way they behaved with light. I thought they were stunning. Excited, I bought a larger one, thinking it would be perfect for me, but not realising how doing the same cut in different proportions would really change the way the diamond behaved with light. Embarrassing I know.
At that time I also designed a setting to go with it, but again I made some mistakes. I drew some pictures, but also said a lot of my preferences verbally without ever writing them down. For some reason beyond me now, I just trusted. There were certainly no CAD images or anything like that.
Anyhow, come to getting the diamond, initially I was swept away, but rapidly I realised that the larger stone looked nothing like the smaller stones. It had a 'fisheye' effect going on and I hated it. I tried so hard to like it because I loved the outer shape of the diamond, and I did lots of reading into why diamonds behave in the way they behave, but I just... hated it.
Furthermore, the setting that I got was nothing like I had asked for - I mean, I could tell it was a pretty setting, and don't get me wrong, it was like the pictures I drew, but I can't draw!!! Obviously nothing I said got translated to the person making it, which is not a surprise really is it!!!
Gosh, was I an idiot.
Let me see if I can add some pictures (note as this is not an engagement ring I do actually wear this on my right hand, but it was easier to take the pictures with it on my left):
Anyway, I had been reassured that I could change the centre diamond if I didn't like it, so I gathered up the courage and went back (not something I felt at ease doing). I asked for the centre diamond to be changed to a round brilliant. In the interests of my perceived belief that I would be peeving them off, I didn't mention how unlike what I wanted the setting was. I figured I would be better getting the central diamond to my liking and I could upgrade the setting at a later date. I didn't want to make a fuss. I hate making a fuss.
I don't get the feeling that finding a diamond in the UK (or probably really Hatton Garden) is really anything like finding a diamond in America. I was offered one or two diamonds that fit with my desire for a GIA triple excellent, F colour and carat request. By that point I wanted to be able to select based on crown angles/table and depth etc, but that was met with resistance. It felt like the ball was in their court and certainly by then I had to work with my own budget rather than inheritance money.
In the end I went for a GIA certificated, triple excellent, F, SI1, 1.65 carat round brilliant diamond with moderate fluorescence.
I loved it. I love it. It has been worth every penny of pleasure it has given me over the last few years. I left it in the original setting because I didn't want to have to go through the process of getting it reset then. Despite the issues I have with the original setting, it's not without its pleasures.
The original setting has shared prong diamonds down the side. They're about 7.5 points each, making the band maybe 3mm, or just a fraction shy of 3mm. Probably like 2.8mm or something like that. That was a really visually pleasing width for the Wondercut diamond, and I like the width on my finger, but it's a bit too wide for this stone. I do love the fact that with a shared prong setting, the only thing you see when looking at the ring from above are diamonds. I've been doing a lot of looking at pavé settings, and they seem to have visible metal as well as the diamonds, and I don't like that. With this setting, there's nearly no metal apart from the dots from the prongs and I love that. And although I feel the side diamonds are a little bit too wide for the central stone it's still beautiful from the top.
I also love the tulip type setting the central diamond is in. I really love that you can see the whole of the side of the diamond without any other metal getting in the way.
However, I do not really like the rest of the side profile of the ring. It's so frustrating. I had not realised how much time I would spend looking at the ring from the side. The side profile of the ring is so important and it's so frustrating that I don't like it! I mostly don't like the fact that the band rises up towards the central diamond (kind of like it's trying to become a cathedral setting, and I don't particularly like cathedral settings). I suspect it was a way to make the central diamond more secure considering there was no metal girdle around the central diamond supporting the prongs from that inner direction, if that makes sense. But I really dislike the fact that it gets taller towards the middle. I'm also not so sure about the textured side of the ring. I like how much metal there is, and I'm regretful that getting it reset will invariably mean less platinum... but yeah. I guess it was just difficult as it's not what I originally asked for. Thinking about it I'm not sure I would have actually liked what I originally asked for either.
Again, some pictures:
Anyhow, NOW to actually get to the point for making this post in the first place!!!
I want to upgrade. I want to slightly upgrade the central stone (focusing on light performance, really) and I definitely want to change the setting.
I'm having a few difficulties.
Firstly, although where I bought the ring from offers all that lifetime upgrade stuff, I'm not really sure that I want to go back there. I certainly wouldn't get value for money and I'm sure I would struggle to express what I wanted with them. They do however have lots of various types of stock so I would be able to try on different styles in person. But the level of service I want for the central diamond really only seems to exist in America? I want light performance etc. Bluenile.co.uk is pretty decent in terms of sourcing diamonds at reasonable prices, but I need to be able to part exchange my current ring.
I think there may be a jeweller locally who might do it for me but I'm very scared to go to them without knowing exactly what I want. I'm also on a budget and I'm scared of going to them and taking their time, and asking lots of questions, and then discovering it's not a project I can move forward with right at this moment. What's the etiquette for these things anyway?
If I could go for any of the vendors that were reputable in America I would, as there are so many amazing ones. But again I would need someone who would part exchange my current ring, and I'm scared about things like shipping. I'm also scared because I'll have to be on a reasonably sensible budget and ultimately if I can't afford what I actually want then I would have to wait. I don't want to come across as if I'm messing anyone around.
Another difficulty I'm having is that I have been obsessing about this since I got the ring in the first place. That's many years of obsessing and I'm worried that nothing will be good enough. I have browsed through thousands of settings and none of them are quite right.
Ideally I would like that tulip setting for the centre diamond to stay because I love how much of the central diamond it exposes. However I also want the band to be the same height all the the way around. In view of the fact I cannot find that combination of my current v-shaped tulip type setting and a very flat band, I suspect that there are structural integrity issues. I wouldn't want to do anything that compromised the security of the central stone. I don't know whether perhaps having thicker central prongs would solve that issue? It already makes me slightly nervous to have four prongs rather than six, but I don't really like the way six prongs looks like.
I really really like the shared prongs for the stones in the band. I've looked at lots of pavé settings and nearly none of them seem quite right, mostly because they seem to have metal visible from the top in addition to the prongs. I have on occasion wondered whether I should have the same setting as I currently have, but like... taking the setting of the side diamond furthest away from the central diamond (and therefore the shortest), make it even shorter, and have that on repeat rather than the progressive increase in height. I'm not sure. I can't find any accurate examples of that. Anything similar tends to have the central diamond 'sat on top' of the band rather than 'integrated into' the band. I really don't like when the shank is 'sat on top'.
I also need it to tolerate being put through an ultrasonic and scrubbed manually with a toothbrush. My current one copes with this just fine.
*Sighs*
The closest setting I've currently found that gives me the nicest side profile is Brian Gavin's Grace setting. Obviously that's a solitaire, so I would need to have it customised to side stones. But how I ask for those side stones to be set I don't know. They have a raised shared prong setting, but that has lots of metal visible from the top so I don't like it. And also there's a doughnut associated with that setting that would stop me from placing a band flush against it if I ever wanted to do that. Thinking I'm not 100% keen on a gap.
I just like how the band is the same thickness all the way around, how the stone is in a delicate basket type setting and well integrated into the band to make it nice and low set... it does have the metal girdle but I suspect it wouldn't be safe without it. Would it?
Also Brian Gavin is in America. I have no idea if they do part exchange. I know they do beautiful diamonds. And whatever I chose from there I would then have to do customs' tax.
There's another setting I have found that I also really really like:
This reminds me strongly of the Grace setting actually, but with diamonds down the side, and the setting on those seems nice? What sort of pavé is that? The only thing I don't like is the micropavé around the central diamond.
I suspect however that, in view of the blinding blinding lights in that video, there might be more metal visible from above than I can tell from the video.
Then of course there's the matter of the central diamond.
I don't actually want to upgrade on size. I am really attached to the fact that there is the number 16 in there. I would want another 1.6... 5/6/7/8. I dunno. Or 1.816? Haha, joking, kind of. When I was searching for my current diamond I looked at GIA F and GIA G diamonds and I could see the colour difference. They were loose diamonds to be fair but it was quite obvious. I would therefore prefer F. I want a VS1 or VS2. For fluorescence I'm not sure. I have heard that sometimes fluorescence improves light performance so long as it doesn't make the diamond cloudy. I know that fluorescence is probably a bit less expensive. But... maybe I would like less fluorescence.
In terms of cut, I want something that gives excellent light performance. I love fire. This is the most important aspect to me. In England I haven't really found any place that does light performance certification. I know that Bluenile does have some ideal diamonds with light performance certificates. They're also significantly more expensive.
I guess you can see from how much I've word-vomited why I'm struggling. At least writing this post has helped clarify a few things for me in my head anyway. Well done if you've made it this far.
I guess I'm not sure what I'm after? Some guidance? Searching etiquette? Setting ideas? Places that are highly recommended on here that would take part exchange? Any help at all would be so appreciated.
Thanks a bunch!
Best wishes,
Lydia.
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