My brother is in emergency surgery - a little dust please?

[Arcadian]

I'm finally back home! (to plumbing problems!!!) But good to be back. The surgery he is to have to put in this pump has been put off yet again. Not sure what its for but its not for insulin.

I'm doing well...Tired. My work schedule is extremely crazy right now as I take on another agency!!! so the timing of all this was pretty bad. Still, The fact That the brothers are going to work together and give my folks a break is good and makes the rest of us breathe a bit better. He won't be leaving the hospital anytime soon though, and we're all just hoping he continues to stay on the healthy track.

@AGBF the thoughts,love, dust, all of it really does help a lot. The support of this board is enormous as I believe meany of us have found out over the years, and I do believe we do care about each other the longer we're here and tight friendships are formed. For better (usually) or worse(sometimes) you all are an extension of who I am and how I've grown as a person. sounds damn mushy but....lol

The board is not just a source of enjoyment (or in some cases slacking...lol) but sometimes allows us to vent where we normally would not in our every day lives. Or, to ask for help when we need it and maybe can't ask for it in our every day lives outside of online.

I can tell you guys things I don't normally tell my IRL friends because (sometimes its about them....lol) I love them too though but I can also be a bit stoic with them in times of emotional stress. The way I appear outside dosen't always reflect what I'm writing. They legit call me Spock sometimes for that reason.

 

[Arcadian]

From how dutiful & straight-faced you sound on this side, I am guessing that you are everyone's safe bet there @Arcadian ... & if this is not too much nothing is [say, a few countries need running - on the side of the hospital visits & all; not kidding]

Fingers crossed

I'm the calm that everyone says they need. My brothers have an easier time talking with me than my mom and dad right now. Probably for the best!

 

[AV_]

That is the work of TWO wives!

 

[missy]

@Arcadian thank you for the update and so glad you are back home and please take care of yourself too. Work is always crazy for you and you have to out yourself first so you can continue doing all that you do. So sorry about the plumbing and hope your plumbing issues are easily resolved. Continuing to keep your brother and your whole family including you in my thoughts and prayers. (((Hugs))).

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Healing vibes across the miles....

kind regards--Sharon

 

[junebug17]

@Arcadian, I'm glad you are back home and please take care of yourself, you've been through a very stressful period. So happy to see that your brother is showing some improvement and I really hope that continues. It's great your brothers are stepping in, it really will help your parents cope with everything. Sending you love and hugs, I know a family crisis like this is really hard on everyone.

 

[MamaBee]

I’ve been following and hoping your brother would shows signs of improvement. I’m hopeful that he will continue..Hope you can get some rest at home despite your workload.

 

[Karl_K]

wound vac pump?
prayers continue!!!!

 

[luv2sparkle]

Praying for your family, Arcadian. Hope your brother is on the road to recovery and doesn't have any setbacks. Thanks for keeping us updated. Please take care of yourself.

 

[Arcadian]

wound vac pump?
prayers continue!!!!

That sounds right. The biggest problem has been every time they would go to put it in, they would find more damaged tissue. Finally though its in place (today!) They're still guarded but very very hopeful

 

[MamaBee]

That sounds right. The biggest problem has been every time they would go to put it in, they would find more damaged tissue. Finally though its in place (today!) They're still guarded but very very hopeful

Good news! Prayers continue!

 

[AGBF]

Good news! Prayers continue!

Prayers continue from Connecticut, too.

Hugs,
Deb

 

[LightBright]

Thinking of your brother with healing thoughts and thinking of you. Hugs from LA.

 

[monarch64]

Arcadian, I am glad you shared, happy to hear your brother is doing better, and even happier to hear you are back home safe. I agree with you that PS is such a supportive place when you need the type of support you might not ask for or get in real life. I have always stuck around because I feel like I’ve grown as a person just by being part of this community and reading along, or being (gently) corrected. I’ve learned a lot of things I may otherwise have missed out on by being here. It’s always nice to hear that someone else feels it is such a valuable experience to be part of PS. Makes me feel less crazy, haha.

 

[princessandthepear]

I hope that your brother has better luck with a wound vac than I did. It is great to hear that your family is pitching in and the support will go a long way. Hospitals factor in family support networks when determining when and where to release patients.
So sorry to hear about your plumbing problems and hope that they are easily resolved. But it still must feel good to be back home and know that family will pitch in to care for your loved ones.
Please remember to take care of yourself. Caregivers need respites too. Continued prayers for you and your family.

 

[Calliecake]

@Arcadian , I’m glad you are back home but am sorry it’s so busy at work right now. The added stress is probably the last thing you need but it has to be a huge relief that the rest of your family is pulling together to help out. You are a very strong woman Arcadian and sometimes family may think you just plow thru and everything and are fine. When things get too stressful please know there are people who understand what you are going thru and will support you here.

 

[Arcadian]

@princessandthepear your experience and knowledge in this area is so very helpful. Sad you went through it, but I'm also greatful to be able to learn this stuff from you. Our experiences can certainly shape us and can be very helpful to others if they so choose to listen (and I do!)

I thankfully was able to cancel the plumber because I seriously did not want to have to shell out 700 bucks to unclog the main line! Me some gloves (yucky) my 6 dollar plunger and 20 dollar shop vac got the job done! It was gross, messy, smelly, but done. I'm going to have to some day have the main cleanout removed and replaced because its old and I'm pretty sure I warped it, but good enough to leave for now.

I'm hoping that the universe is done. last month sucked so bad....lol

As long as we can keep the pressure off mom and dad, I think we as a family will be able to manage this. That won't always be easy, my mom and dad want to be very involved, because he's their baby. But he really does not want to lean on them. Thats a plus.

My middle brother is still not my favorite person and I'm not his either, but he's got grit that I can appreciate and admire. We also have had some very long (very deep and honest) conversations as of late...the type we didn't have when we were younger but maybe should have.

We'll never like each other, I'd never unplug his life support to charge my phone (though we certainly joked about it! lol) We do indeed deeply love each other which is far more important.

 

[metall]

@Arcadian, I am so glad to see the happy ending to this. Though he still has a long road to recovery - it sounds like your brother got through the worst of it.

Sending hugs to you, prayers for your family and lots of dust to your brother an absolutely uneventful, boring recovery - hopfully that would help relieve a lot of pressure and stress to your family.

 

[princessandthepear]

Please feel free to ask me any question and I will answer if able, I was diagnosed as a diabetic in my twenties and have had numerous experiences with complications and treatments over the past 30 years.

 

[missy]

@Arcadian I just wanted to say I am still sending good thoughts your and your brother's way and I hope with each day he is improving.

 

[Karl_K]

Prayers continue!

 

[Crystal_Dreams]

I only just saw this thread as I’ve been working non stop for the last week, but sending healing dust your way too!!

I’ve skimmed through most of the thread, but it sounds like your brother had necrotising fasciitis... if he is pulling through, believe it or not despite the horrible things he has been through... he is LUCKY. For reference... I work in ER. Nec fasc is a crazy INSANELY fast spreading infection. As in, it moves in HOURS. What might be ‘normal’ tissue one hour is not in the next. It is actually possible that he didn’t have it when he was first seen (though he possibly had maybe a wound or scratch... maybe even cellulitis), which then became a roaring infection... especially if he’s a diabetic. I often tell my patients when they come in, that my job is to make sure they DON’T have any major life threatening conditions. This would be one of those things. At the same time... things can change so quickly... that I also always tell them that if there is any change or they feel worse, to come back to ER. No one should ever feel that they’ve been ‘seen in ER’ and sent home so it’s ‘nothing’ to worry about. I say this to ALL my patients. For the very reason that things can and do change quickly...

I’ve heard surgeons compare themselves to firefighters when talking about this... the only way to stop it is by getting to viable tissue before the infection does... but of course, you CAN’T just go around cutting people up and taking out ALL their tissue so infection doesn’t get into it... it’s a difficult line they walk.

Either way, I’m very glad to hear that he is on the mend! Your family is very lucky to have you supporting them!!

 

[lilmosun]

I'm so sorry. I'm glad he is doing well enough for you to go home and that there is other family to help.

fwiw - my dad is a diabetic disabled vet (on dialysis). He had an old war wound open up 2 years ago and it left exposed bone in his leg and it wouldn't heal due to lack of skin/diabetes. We trekked him to many specialists (fortunately, he is well insured) and the only recommendations were amputation or let it go and keep hoping that infection didn't reach the bone. Because of his age, poor health and progressive dementia, amputation really wasn't an option in our minds. After thinking we had explored all options, it was a routine trip to his podiatrist who recommended another wound clinic that turned things around. They recommended hyperbaric treatment (to promote healing and fight infection) and plastic surgery using a muscle flap to cover the bone. Despite the odds, it all worked out. It may not be suitable in your brother's case but thought I would mention it as I got told that although hyperbarics is a known wound treatment for diabetics, it often isn't recommended as many facilities don't have a chamber (and thus their doctors may not be familiar with it).

 

[AGBF]

Thank you for your posting, lilmosun. My father had gangrene in one of his toes when he was 95 or 96. I do not remember when it started. (He died at 96.) Surgeons were discussing everything from amputating his toe to amputating his leg. I thank God he had a sensible internist who wouldn't quickly amputate the leg of a 96 year-old man and a wonderful, extremely intelligent RN (visiting nurse) who refused to give up. He, also, went to a wound care center into which it was very hard to gain entry. There were regular visits and care of the wound by a team that involved removal of some tissue, but despite all the negative predictions, antibiotics saved most of his toe. Our wonderful (Russian) RN basically said, "I told you so". It was truly a miracle. When he was in the hospital the surgeons were truly ready to remove his entire leg!!!

Deb/AGBF

PS-This wound care center also had a hyperbaric chamber.

 

[whitewave]

Still thinking about you and your family. Hope all is well.

 

[Arcadian]

Thank you all. @lilmosun @Crystal_Dreams it is a rollercoaster ride. He did do some backsliding unfortunately. So this gets a bit personal but they're going to have to remove the scrotum and some other tissue because they're doing as crystal_dreams said, getting that tissue before the infection starts. They're going to put in a colostomy bag as well to help lessen the chances of infection. This operation is happening today. Not sure if that bag will be permanent but likely given his condition.

If his blood pressure continues to wobble and go down, there's some talk he may have to be put back into ICU and back on oxygen.

Was supposed to talk with him this weekend which did not happen considering. He's fighting which as long as he can he will. The day I left he told me that he's up for the recovery being painful and if he's gonna have to die, it won't be without a fight. Good for him! My mother of course is beside herself and in some denial. I told my brother to put the thought into her head about therapy. She needs it and she will listen to him. She'll listen to me too, but I'm probably too blunt about it.

 

[Karl_K]

sad to hear he has backslided some.
Prayers continue.

 

[AV_]

You are the good, kind kind of 'blunt'. I would hardly know what to say to someone at the end of their wits with grief - unless they were in the same room so gestures do allot of the talking.

 

[Crystal_Dreams]

Sending more healing dust your way for your brother!! Fingers and everything else crossed for him and his recovery!

 

[Arcadian]

Hi All:

Very good news!!!

So I'm going to give a final update and ask for this thread to be closed. They're now going to permanently close the wound and remove him from all the antibiotics tomorrow.

I thank all of you so very much for your thoughts, prayers, dust. You know, I used to think that good people were in short supply, that doesn't seem to be the case here.

Much love to all. The light at the end of the tunnel just got a bit brighter.