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Millenials to Boomers etc.

Discussion in 'Hangout' started by Tekate, Feb 12, 2018.

  1. Tekate
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    by Tekate » Feb 12, 2018
    Asscher I'm copying your latest post to me here for reply.

    My alcoholic abusive father died when I was 12, Mom went to work (previously owned their own business, mostly worked out of the house) 6 days a week, one full time and two part time jobs. I got a job at 12, seventh grade, working 15-20 hours a week all through junior and high school, so I could buy my own food and clothes since my Mother did everything she could to not go upside down on our house.

    My alcoholic/abusive/drug addict mom tried to kill me when I was 13. When I use the word abusive let me just say that it was way worse than that, my mother was ANGRY, ADDICTED, ALCOHOLIC and couldn't stand me. When I was 14 I babysat, 15 babysat, 16 worked in a grocery store 5 days a week, 3 after school, it was better than being at home. My father was an alcoholic who zoned out, was away all the time drinking. In high school I was working 18 hours a week during school and 16 hours on weekends.. in those days grocery stores closed at 6:00 pm. I bought my own clothes or my sister and I shared because she could sew, although I was heavier and taller than her, she always let me squeeze in. Miss her. My mother set the house on fire, she tried to commit suicide 2X in front of us, she was toughest on me and my brother behind me.


    I wanted to be a teacher, steady paycheck, jobs around here are supposedly "good" and "safe". I went local, driving my 1992 Maxima that I paid for in cash I saved. I had some scholarships, my first year I didn't pay much because my Mother ended up going to federal prison for a year when I was 15/16 for fraud committed while in business with my father when he was alive. FAFSA saved me that year. After my Mom got back, my senior year in high school, she ended up pregnant with twins pretty quickly. She got married, which ****ed me over since she went from basically no income to now include her husband's. I was already one year in at my school, and not about to go somewhere else.

    I wanted to me a physician, an anything to get out of that hell hole.. theme song: we gotta get outta this place. I never had a car till I was 25, my mother at that time started sobering up and my brothers were getting into HUGE problems, my Dad lost his job and went on a BENDER! for 4 days, he lost his job due to stealing money from his job, they did not arrest him, made him pay it back.. the union came on board and negotiated a deal that if my father could stay sober for 3 months they would rehire him.. he did, they did and he worked for 11 more years in his blue collar job as an exemplary employee.. my mother actually sobered up because she knew my father was going off the alcoholic deep edge, which he did to.. Without student aide from the CUNY system, a work/study program from the FEDS I don't know where I would be today, TRUTH. Your mother should have hung with my mom in the 70s.. BUT my mom did sober up and really tried hard to make amends BUT sometimes that doesn't take away any of the PTSD that I was diagnosed with over the years. My mother was spoiled, lazy, spoiled, she expected a queenly life and she married a blue collar guy who only wanted to go out and dance to swing and dress up.. there was no escape for the Greatest generation.

    I worked full time in retail, and attended school full time, and babysat on the weekends, and help raised my twin brothers. I had to take a few classes over because of life and working all of those hours. In all I ended up about 60k in debt from undergrad. I graduated in 2007, the first year that school districts cut positions like crazy, no one I graduated with from a school renowned for their education program secured a teaching position for the next year. I was lucky to get a 19k per year paraprofessional position.

    I worked full time in secretarial/business/ambulance car rider/messenger etc. I helped raise my two Irish twin brothers born 13 months apart - quite another story of how that affected my life. I ended up with 25K in debt and as I said, my ex had over 80K (all in todays dollars). Never interested in teaching (my sister taught).

    So then I went to grad school, CUNY to save as much as possible, while working full time as a para, while working part time at Macy's. In 2009 when I finished grad school officially 80k in debt (6 years, 2 degrees) I was lucky enough to get a teaching position in Brooklyn. I spent the next 6 years earning less than 3k a month while my student loans and half of the rent alone was over half of my take home pay. This is the shit I talk about. They didn't have "income sensitive" repayment when I finished, we just had to pay, and pay, and pay. And with teachers with Masters degrees earning 3k per month, how the hell is anyone supposed to save to buy anything? This is why, when possible, we live at home, even teachers can't afford other options.

    I could not think of grad school or law school or medical school, I had to get a job, I needed a car, I needed an out. (I also took a semester off and worked at a ski lodge way upstate, that was fun, I skied for free but man I worked my a$$ off for pennies).

    If anything I'm one of the luckier ones, I fought through it, finished, and eventually will dig myself out. Many of my friends, not so lucky. Never managed to get a teaching job, degree is old now, no one will hire them, they work in retail for shit money or in restaurants. Or they have 120k in debt for a degree is psychology, which is worthless. I get it, it's their fault, blah blah blah. But why the hell let someone take out so much money? Why can anyone take out 120k in loans when they wouldn't even be able to get a car loan? And this debt can't even be discharged with bankruptcy. It's ruining people's lives. Why can someone start over after racking up 50k on credit cards but student debt is unforgivable?

    Truth be told I don't know about many people in my time, most went to college, most became teachers, engineers, opened their own businesses. One became a reverend. All the guys knew at Fordham became lawyers, some went into the military. Many of my girlfriends did not get 4 year degrees.. some still struggle today, divorce, mortgages underwater, I am the only one of my original posse that isn't working. My big break was getting hired by IBM. Changed my life. People are responsible for themselves at 18, you know that.. why would you ever think that someone should or would say, don't take out that loan, we are all grownups, my mother said "Tekate, you made your bed, now sleep in it". As to discharging the college debts of millenials.. blame that on the republicans, they are the ones who threw that one in. People my age and slackers also over used the bankruptcy plan I think.

    Things need to change. They need to. An entire generation is crippled by being pushed to go to college. To just keep taking out loans. My husband would have been much better off joining the sanitation department than going to college. His parents pushed him, forced him to go and then helped pay for nothing. He spent just as much as me to finish school, and makes half as much. Now we have a child and he needs to keep his job for the flexible schedule. We're stuck. It's the most educated generation with no where to go.

    You see, the thing I would do IS join the sanitation department till I paid for effing loans off. I never EVER pushed my sons to go to college EVER. BUT when they were young I would say to them, See this place XY? this is where people live who don't go to college.. one day my husband was bringing #2 son home from a flag football game in SE Austin, XY was about 6 and he turned to my husband and said: "Daddy is there where people live who didn't go to college"? so I did influence them but I never told them once they had to go to college, we did say to them, XY * XY, if you want more choices in life, then you need to go to college, if you work at HEB without getting some kind of degree then your choice will be very limited in life, they heard that. My DIL, has no degree works at CVS at a pharmacy tech, has now been promoted to training techs and going to different CVS to observe and write reports and train to enhance the program for younger people coming on board.. she owes a lot of money in my mind for not getting her degree, but her parents didn't go to college and they didn't help her one iota, her dad is an electrician with a jones and her mom is an idiot.

    The differences I see in your history and mine is, you seem to feel owed, you feel as though you were screwed. I never did, I never once looked back and did anything I could for money (within reason). As I said my break came in the computer revolution, I was hired as a secretary, retrained to be a coder, married an IBM the 2nd time.. If IBM said to me: would you take this training, I ALWAYS said YES. Your generation is not screwed, my nephew worked in banking in Manhattan after getting a business degree from Penn State, he hated it and opened his own furniture making business, he's still trying to break even. His wife has 2 kids from her first marriage and one with my nephew, it's a crazy life but they make, she is a lawyer downtown but she surely doesn't make tons, she get's great child support, she gave up a plus life to live her life, I admire her, it's a struggle. Dealing with exhusbands sucks sucks sucks.

    here are some threads I read to better understand this millenial crisis.


    https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-new...g-it-hard-transition-adulthood-report-n748676
    https://www.forbes.com/sites/larrya...get-jobs-heres-why-and-what-to-do-about-it/2/
    http://www.apa.org/research/action/speaking-of-psychology/unlocking-millennials.aspx

    I can say to you: move to Texas, while it's hot and sucks in so many ways, there are teaching jobs, there are jobs for psych majors in startups, from what I read many startups (millenial started) need the psych major to understand their employees and their future and current customers.. you can take a psych degree and turn it into a new career.

    http://www.careerprofiles.info/psychology-bachelors-degree-career-options.html
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2018
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  2. Asscherhalo_lover
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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    And why does it have to be a tit for tat? I didn't even want to reply to you in the other thread because you're just going to keep on going. Why is it so hard?

    "The differences I see in your history and mine is, you seem to feel owed, you feel as though you were screwed."

    Again, congrats to you, but I'm allowed to feel how I feel. Most of the kids I grew up with, we were all pushed into this. Pretty much told from childhood that we MUST go to college, and everything is so over saturated the degree becomes less competitive and worthless. We were fed LIES, and when it all came crashing down, ya, a lot of people are bitter as hell. Especially when we're made fun of for it.

    I don't need to move to Texas for a teaching job, I've been at mine for over 9 years now, again, I'm one of the lucky ones.
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2018
  3. Asscherhalo_lover
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  4. AGBF
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    by AGBF » Feb 12, 2018
    Oh, Kate. This is not the life I had envisioned that you had from what I had read from your previous postings. In fact, I am incredibly shocked. I remember reading that your mother made the best corned beef, and I had a picture in my head of a warm and cozy (perhaps Irish) home with a stay-at-home mom who created a loving environment.

    We see people on the street and paint pictures in our heads of the perfect lives they must lead, not having any idea of what their real struggles may be. AA has a saying, "Don't compare your insides to other people's outsides". But I still get surprised (I guess because I am a slow learner) when a poster like you who seems so together startles me by saying that her childhood was terrible.

    I am so sorry. You are a miracle! I wish I had your ability to overcome adversity. You are a strong, amazing woman!

    Hugs,
    (((Kate)))
    Deb
     
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  5. Bonfire
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    by Bonfire » Feb 12, 2018
    As a Boomer myself I’m going to wade in here (probably shouldn’t) to say how sorry I am that both if you, @Asscherhalo_lover and @Tekate have had such hardships as children and adolescents. To make it a battle between generations is unfortunate though. As women from each generation lets not be combative and competitive with one another but commiserate and support one another and lift the other up. You both have the shared experience. You are each to be commended for your perseverance.
     
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  6. Asscherhalo_lover
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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    Believe me, I have no desire to back and forth with someone, @Tekate called me out to answer, I don't really find it productive.
     
  7. Tekate
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    by Tekate » Feb 12, 2018
    Thanks, there's a LOT more to say but my mom sobered up.. she tried very very very hard to make it up to me and my sibs.. those were the days of: don't tell anyone.. (although everyone knew-small town!) thank you again.

    I just don't have a lot of commiseration with millenials BF because I went thru what they did, and I feel there is always hope.

    Thank you again.


     
  8. Tekate
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    by Tekate » Feb 12, 2018
    @Asscherhalo_lover called you out? I don't think I was at all snarky and calling out till I received some pretty snarky remarks about hoping my 'kids had happy lives'..

    Wanting to truly understand why a person feels the way they do was my whole point.

    I'm a big believer in learning. I learned from Red.. what I learned from you is there is no hope for millenials.. to each his own..

     
  9. Tekate
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    by Tekate » Feb 12, 2018
    Yes she did! she had moments of glory! but she was a codeine addict and after flipping out she moved to booze.. she was quite the user. My mother did one really great thing for me, that was to send me to Catholic high school.. at that point she went off the deep end.. she had my sister and I going to two different high schools. There I met friends who were supportive and all had at least one alcoholic parent. Very tough times. Yaya sisterhood.. I was the wildest.

    My mother sobered up when I was almost 24 and she died when I was 47 so I had many years of year making corned beef and being 'that mom'... I loved her very much Deb, but from age 5 to age 23 - those were hard... lotsa interesting times..

    My sister and I and little brothers had till I was 12 my grandmother, who lived over the hill and SHE was the one that looked out for us (my mom's mom).. I asked her once why my mom hated me, and she said "She didn't know but thought maybe that I was born 3 months after my grandfather died and she just couldn't find it in her heart to love me"... that was pretty honest of my grandmother.. but she died and that was the end of anything... till I was 24..

    When a person joins AA they have to make amends to those they have hurt, and my mother wrote me a letter that almost put me in the looney bin.. I threw it away, it was sooooo painful, I was very supportive of my parents life in AA.. both never drank again after 1975/and 1976.

    When you live in a crazy drunk house the kids love each other and we all did.. we used to run away together!.. :)

    So I did have a happy life in a way till my grandmother died because we just ran over the hill every night and slept there when my mom was going nutzoid.. but that ended.. my grandmother had zero control over my mom.. I will always and forever be a supporter of Alcoholics Anonymous, my father regained his job and some self respect Deb.. my mom became - as my husband always called her "that sweet white haired old lady"... so there is a dichotomy in my life with my mom.. I still, at this age, go back and forth on my feelings for her.. SHE was frustrated, she wanted way more in life and she was angry angry... and that came tumbling out when she drugged up or drank... it was ugly. I told my sister 30 years ago that were were like Humpty dumpty.. we fell off that wall and we were put together again, but nothing was quite safe or the same.. my sister in a way was more affected because my sister had polio and was in an iron lung and had to learn how to walk again, this was one of my first memories (I was 2).. my sister was never healthy in her whole life. Both my brothers are/were convicted felons and cocaine/alcohol/drug addicts.. one is dead, one is crazy.

    It's so hard to explain but I did love my mom very much and I hated her too.

     
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  10. Asscherhalo_lover
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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    Read into things what you want @Tekate. I never said there was no hope, if there wasn't, I never would have kept struggling the way I have to make my life and my family's life better. And I never started a comparison or a pissing contest, you did. I could go through line for line but there's no point in that.
     
  11. Tekate
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    by Tekate » Feb 12, 2018
    @Asscherhalo_lover you called it a pissing contest, I felt attacked as a boomer by the doom and gloom, I read your pointer (not sure if you read any of mine). That was a very gloomy picture, but my statement is a belief that a person CAN overcome a recession, life not being fair, and I'm a democrat.

    I wish you the best of luck in trying to make ends meet, being a parent, teaching, and I say to you again.. Texas and southern states are booming, in Austin you can get a 4 bedroom 3200sq ft house for 300K, Round Rock, Leander, the city is very expensive. Like the people in the Great Depression, they packed up and moved to better lives.

    College.. I have no clue why college is so expensive, it wasn't in Texas. I know my aunt has a MA from NYU and she has never been able to be more than an adjunct getting paid crap, so I don't think it's prof's salaries. I'd say the below NYTimes article sums it up pretty fairly.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/05/opinion/sunday/the-real-reason-college-tuition-costs-so-much.html

    If you can't read it, high light me and I'll copy the whole thing.

    My husband said the thing that he found really wonderful about me was I was always happy, and truth be known, I think that is genetic.. I ALWAYS thought tomorrow would be better and as I became an adult and went thru many things/times/marriage(s) that was mostly true. I always believe tomorrow will be better.

    I always thank God at night for another day... not of life, but of a good life. (not that I am a big believer in God etc but I thank my DNA maybe, but whatever I thank it).


     
  12. Asscherhalo_lover
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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    Have you checked teacher salaries in Texas? I would never have been able to pay anything making 25k. Fine for people with no debt, not realistic for most. I will never make more money anywhere other than where I am. I don't need 3200 square feet, I'd be happy with a two bedroom condo, but alas, doom and gloom, made up in my head.
     
  13. redwood66
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    by redwood66 » Feb 12, 2018
    I just read this with my millennial son. It was interesting and some points I can absolutely agree with like the zoning issues and housing. Cities create their own problems depending on who is running the show and who has the money. My location is a resort area so many of the lower paying jobs are service industry positions. We also continually have a huge influx of retirees bringing large sums of money from elsewhere like SoCal. There has been a realization of lack of affordable housing and I have seen many new multifamily and apartment complexes being built to address the issue. Cities will have to improve on the situations they have created or businesses and workers will go elsewhere.

    My two millennials live at home right now while going to college. This is what we can do to help them and I have no problem doing it. Sure it is less than optimal for all of us since they are 26 years old, but we make it work. I do have reservations about their disinterest in face to face relationships with other people. They have plenty of friendships they maintain online with people they met while in Japan and elsewhere around the world. But who am I to talk, here I am conversing with all of you. :mrgreen2:

    To the general you - I don't know how it will all turn out in 10-30 years but I do know that arguing on the internet won't make you one bit happier in your situation, whatever that may be, unless you are looking for a temporary high in a gotcha moment on someone you will likely never meet. I appreciated reading both @Asscherhalo_lover's and @Tekate's stories. You both have made sacrifices and lived through terrible situations and my heart goes out to you. Keep on keepin' on.
     
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  14. smitcompton
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    by smitcompton » Feb 12, 2018
    Hi,

    There is no point in a pissing contest. How true. But this is not really a pissing contest, but two stories of two people from different generations who have struggled against similar obstacles in their lives, and maybe its the telling of their story that is the important thing. What marvelous energy, perseverance and courage you both have. You both survived and did good. That is uplifting for the rest of us. I would have liked to make a beautiful statement, but your stories told it all.

    Annette
     
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  15. arkieb1
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    by arkieb1 » Feb 12, 2018
    I'm sorry for the hardships you both had to face, and thank you for sharing your backgrounds with us - this is exactly why I get so annoyed at so many Millennials it's not that it is a pissing contest, I feel this sense of frustration that so many of them whine and whine about how hardly done by they are and fail to acknowledge that other people before them may indeed have gone though tougher circumstances than their own. The huge part of the Millennial way of thinking I can't come to terms with is this self absorbed narcissism that so many of them walk around carrying. My 20 something nieces and nephews feel like the world owes them something.

    Irrespective of which decade we were born in, many of us have struggles in life that have had to be overcome - that is how life is.
     
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  16. Asscherhalo_lover
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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    So in general, do people simply not think that things are actually quite bleak for young people looking ahead? I take from all of this, that things are basically as they have always been, no worse, no harder. If that's the case, why do you think so many people are living at home, not having children, working in under employed jobs?
     
  17. LLJsmom
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    by LLJsmom » Feb 12, 2018
    @Tekate and @Asscherhalo_lover
    Your stories of survival move me to tears. How a parent does not cherish their children is unfathomable to me, yet it happens again and again. I do not know the beginning of the conversation as I only read this thread. However, speaking of millenials in general, I too have noticed their sense of entitlement. However, I also do understand why some of them have what the other generations perceive as a sense of entitlement. I am a gen x'er.

    Many of my younger cousins grew up going to pre-school where project "self-esteem" was popular. Love everyone and accept everyone. Most importantly love yourself. All great ideas and definitely children should be taught that. However, you take that idea and apply it to everything? Voila! May I present the Millenial. (@Asscherhalo_lover Please don't take offense. From your stories, you worked hard for everything you had, including your survival.)

    I'm sharing just what I've seen among my family and friends. In my social circle, many of the millenials I know have immigrant parents, who worked very hard in the 70s-80s, climbing whatever ladder to make a good income. Doctors, lawyers, corp heads, etc. However, they wanted more for their children than they had. They sacrificed many things to give their children the things they didn't have. This includes private school education, lessons, traveling opportunities, etc. These kids were much more coddled growing up. They received a lot without needing to work for much. So honestly, it's not that much of a surprise that the ones I know exhibit this attitude. It's only an attitude to me. To them, it's perfectly understandable and justifiable.
    Many have seen their parents become very successful, yet have had very unhappy home lives. Mom and Dad were always at work. Then they "made it" and still got divorced. They decided that a traditional house with a picket fence is not for them. They work to save up enough for travel, and then travel until they run out of money and have to work again. I have several family members that have decided on that route. And they say they can't afford to buy a house anyway so why bother.
    With the globalization of so many industries, the economic climate is just more challenging and everything is more competitive. Home buying, job hunting... Combine that with the rude "real world awakening" the millenials have been treated to, I can see why they are whining.
    And not all families are made equal. That sucks and is unfair, but it just is. Look at what @Tekate and @Asscherhalo_lover had to go through. I was lucky. My parents did not have college educations, worked hard at blue collar jobs, and put me through good schools and really instilled in my the importance of an education, while colleges were relatively affordable. Now? $50K-$60K a year, easy, at an ok small private school. That is wrong and a whole other topic. My kids are also lucky. I am brutally practical and share with them the realities of our budget, and how much it costs to support a household. About going to college, how much you make working at a fast food chain compared to being an attorney? And after you earn money, how much does the federal and state take, how much does insurance cost and how much are you left with? I am just telling them that their choice of major affects the next step, which is finding a job, which affects the next step, which is to support themselves and potentially a family. At the very minimum, they are aware. Many decisions will lead back to having a roof over your head and putting bread on the table, and having some level of healthcare. But maybe some kids never got the practical speech from the parents. If the kid was naturally a practical person, then they are lucky. They will be able to survive. But for the dreamer whose parents did not prepare them for the realities of life, and said, be whatever major you want, things will work out - maybe things are a lot harder now.

    I don't know if this helps at all, but this explains some of what I see from the people in my life. It helps me have some compassion for the Millenials, and inspires me to try not to the do the same thing to my kids. Although, I do admit to being guilty of coddling them. So I guess we will see.
     
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  18. Asscherhalo_lover
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  19. Matata
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    by Matata » Feb 12, 2018
    Looks as though it's going to get worse soon -- for everyone.

    https://www.cnbc.com/2018/01/23/economy-and-interest-rates-eiu-predicts-next-us-recession.html

    https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entr...nefits-republican_us_5a7e0362e4b08dfc93040b5e
     
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  20. LLJsmom
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    by LLJsmom » Feb 12, 2018
    As a parent of a teen and a tween, I find myself thinking about this question a lot. Things are not the same. However, every generation has its challenges. The boomers? Geez. As a woman who would have wanted to work, I think I would have found working in the corporate environment really difficult. All I can say is, did you see "Battle of the Sexes"? Just cut and paste to the corporate environment. Vietnam, the draft? Bay of pigs? In the generation before that, wasn't that right after WW2? Ok, that was a pretty positive generation, but probably still sucked for women. My generation? 70s and 80s, super high inflation? The Cold War? War Games was a real fear. Drugs. AIDs. Make tons of money, then get divorced because you never saw each other. Thus, Dallas, Dynasty. Huge Hits. Millenials deal with globalization of the work force. Trump. Maybe the millenials are a lot smarter too. Why move out when the home (and your old bedroom) is super comfy and FREE?!? Young people in tons of other countries live at home until married, and some married couples live with parents. My daughter has already asked me if she can live at home. I said sure. I would love to have her a long as I can. Kids are a lot of work and super expensive. Do I really want one? Hmmm...now that I know, maybe I should rethink this. I have millenial cousins that have decided, NO KIDS FOR ME. Don't want to spend the money, and don't really want them. There is less societal pressure to have them anyway...
    Wow. Times sure are changing. And I guess, always have.
     
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  21. WeeOui
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    by WeeOui » Feb 12, 2018
    You guys think you had it so bad? Well, after my father died, I was raised by my cruel stepmother. I was reduced to a scullery maid, scrubbing floors and cleaning stew pots, and ironing my stepsisters’ beautiful clothes while I had to dress myself in mouse dropping held together by cockroach wings. To fortify myself, I made porridge out of my own bowel movements. Every night, I went to my little bed, otherwise known as the FLOOR, and had baked potato kisees only in my sour cream dreams. Such was life.
     
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  22. LLJsmom
    Ideal_Rock

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    by LLJsmom » Feb 12, 2018
    No, none of them are white, although some of them married white spouses. You were not spoiled, so I can see why you would call them so. They are of the millenial age, so even though they do not represent you, they are part of the millenial generation. They exist and therefore cannot be discounted as millenials. You can label them spoiled, but they are millenials.

    I read the article, and I am not sure what point you are trying to make. I still think that millenials have it more challenging in the job arena because of globalization, but that can cut both ways.

    Challenges for each generation will be different. And people from each generation have stepped up. I guess I would not be one to be excessively sympathetic to one generation v another. I think there are pros and cons to all. I finished reading Boys in the Boat a couple of years ago, about the University of Washington crew team that won the gold in the Olympics in Germany right before WW2 broke out. All those young men who put themselves through college while hunting in the forest and constructing Hoover Dam during the summer? Amazing. Really humbling. Compared to those men, many of us had it easy.
     
  23. lyra
    Ideal_Rock

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    by lyra » Feb 12, 2018
    I think I'm barely a boomer, and my kids are barely? millenials. My daughters are 27 and 30. They may not ever be able to buy homes, live on one wage, or take time off work to raise kids IF they even have them. They both still live at home. The eldest just got laid off her job where she was full time contract, no benefits for over 3 years. That is the norm here. Full time with benefits is very hard to find. House prices are near the $1Mil mark within a 50+km range of where we live. Wages do not keep up with inflation. They have modest student loans to repay. Eldest daughter has to go back to school to study another area (1 year program) somewhat related to her degree, to even hope to have a chance at a decent job as the gov't just introduced legislation last year that cost her a job in her field. It's pretty damn bleak. Neither of my kids is self-entitled. They and we, are victims of a bad economy that doesn't look like it will be improving any time soon. It would be completely different if we lived in an area where you could buy a house for $300K. Unfortunately, those places don't usually have jobs.
     
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  24. Matata
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Matata » Feb 12, 2018
    At least you had a floor Screen Shot 2018-02-12 at 7.24.51 PM.png Putting this here for perspective. It's frustrating and scary not being able to achieve whatever an individual's American dream happens to be. Millennials make up the largest work force in recent history and have the power, through sheer numbers, to achieve monumental social change should they so desire. So I hope they turn out and vote in record numbers and become active in social activism in record numbers, shake things up, and make things happen. In the meantime, when things look bleak because houses are unaffordable and debt seems crushing, pause a moment to remember that those things are still a privilege, in a weird way, when compared to the majority of the world that is torn apart by war and where suffering is unspeakable.
     
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  25. Asscherhalo_lover
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    @lyra THANK YOU I'm 32, anyone born from 1980-2004 is generally considered a millennial. Let's not even get into lack of healthcare and maternity benefits, people would really lose their minds.

    No one is saying that previous generations didn't have challenges, of course they did. But, things are bleak and not looking to improve anytime soon. Things are supposed to improve as time goes on, and yet they do not.

    For everyone always referencing war and this generation not understanding, I was in high school and could visibly see the twin towers smoldering. We grew up in a world of terror attacks, it's not nothing. I have several family members serving in various parts of the US military.
     
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  26. smitcompton
    Ideal_Rock

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    by smitcompton » Feb 12, 2018
    Hi,

    The two things that I know that have far outpaced inflation are tuition and medical care. The intention of the Gov't in providing school loans was to encourage college attendance. Of course the for profit banks saw their opportunity to cash in as well and so a new industry was born. Born of basically good intentions. Wherever the Gov't steps in someone looks to take advantage. The school did and with so much money flying around, new capital programs began and tuition went up, up and up. And the students came without thinking they would have to pay this money back. Its a bit like free money. Earlier students did not have this choice and so did not begin life with student debt, which many utilize for much more than tuition. This is a problem for your generation. The earlier generation would have worked and gone to,school at night or part-time. People went to law school at night. And others went into the trades. You see in fact they made it easy for you, they seduced you with free money, to be paid back yrs from then.

    Since I am familiar with Brooklyn and CUNY, went there myself, you didn't rack up that debt there. You could have done your degree there, but I take it you didn't. Out where I live now, community colleges are available. Now the piper is to be paid. You are at a disadvantage now, I agree. But see what happened. You have a good position now, but if you are still in Brooklyn housing is expensive. Once my brother and I moved out of Brooklyn(I owned a house), we would never go back because the cost of living is so much higher than the Midwest. Your location does make things tough for you. But don't put a label on yourself. You're an individual with resilience
    and have come this far, you will have opportunities to come. Pay off those loans as fast as you can.
    Then you can breathe.

    Annette
     
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  27. Asscherhalo_lover
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    Yet many in this country won't let these people in, but that's a whole other topic.
     
  28. MissStepcut
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by MissStepcut » Feb 12, 2018
    Starting this call out thread is in such poor taste I’m rather surprised it wasn’t shut down by a mod as being against the community standards. Pretty appalling behavior from an adult.
     
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  29. Asscherhalo_lover
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    You're right, my debt came from going to Molloy. I mentioned earlier, my first year of college was pretty much free due to my mom being in prison and having no income. Then she got married and I was screwed. I had already finished one year in the best program for education that had a great reputation. It was my best chance at a job to continue the program. So I kept going, doing a few summer classes to graduate on time. That plus my grad school, Queens college, plus all of the interest that compounds the whole time you're in school, came to 80,000. I did work full time through undergrad, and full time plus part time through grad school. I lived at home, and paid rent, and for all of my things, car, food, clothes, wedding, all of it.

    I have never lived in Brooklyn, I could never afford it. I got lucky and we found an old two family house with cheap (1500) rent. It's a piece of crap but it's warm and we can "afford" it. So it is what it is. Paying off our loans has always been a priority. We started out with about 160,000, we have about 25 to go.
     
  30. Asscherhalo_lover
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Feb 12, 2018
    Believe me I was pretty shocked to see my post quoted and torn apart, but I'm not one to not at least try and defend myself. People can think what they want, but I know who I am.
     

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