Ladies opinion on picking out settings.

[Sparkle Boy]

Well I have heard many different opinions on this so I thought I would post it on here.

First of all the question
Would you rather pick out your own setting, or have your boyfriend pick it out?

Now for the background info. My girlfriend wants to be somewhat surprised, but when I have made her go in a jewelry store she has had some pretty distinct likes and dislikes. In other words she has an look she is after, but she isn''t willing to tell me all the details. I want this to be very special and I don''t want to seem like I haven''t done the work, but I also don''t want to pick something out she won''t be 1000% happy with.

I am about 50/50 right now on going with designing the setting myself based on what info she has given me, or just putting it in a simple cheap band and showing her all my research and thoughts and letting her do the final design.

Here is the stone if you didn''t see my other thread.
http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/1945/

What are your opinions? I really want to ask her sister but if I did she would tell her in about an hour, she is terrible at keeping secrets and they talk about three times a day.

Thanks for your thoughts

 

[sumbride]

Let her pick! You picked the diamond... so that''s her "surprise" along with the proposal... but the setting is just such a personal thing that she should really be involved in it. Not only does she have specific likes and dislikes, but once it''s on her hand, she may discover that what she likes doesn''t look like she thought it would... or it doesn''t suit her activity level... or whatever.... Go with the simple temp setting for the proposal and let her know that the two of you will pick out the setting together.

and congrats!

 

[kcoursolle]

Since she has distinct tastes, one of two things should happen to make her happy. She can either give you more helpful suggestions and nail down a couple ideas, or she should help pick it out. You could also ask her if she rather be surprised or pick it herself.

I am picky personally, and I really enjoyed picking out my own setting. If she has distinct taste, she may not want to be surprised with something that isn''t just what she is looking for.

 

[KristyDarling]

I like your idea of proposing with the diamond in a simple temporary setting (white gold solitaire) and letting her pick the setting. As you''ve said, since she has very distinct likes and dislikes, it''s probably best if she has a hand in the design. Kudos to you for being so thoughtful and accommodating!

 

[bling*diva*]

~~I think you should let her pick the setting. Since she has distinct likes and dislikes, there is a chance that if you pick it, she may not like it. She would still be somewhat surprised by the proposal, but to be on the safe side, you should let her pick the setting, that way you''ll be sure that she will end up with something that she loves!! HTH

 

[jetmal]

let her pick it out...my vote......

you can either do the temp setting, or tell her you need 2-3 specific settings and you will make the final decision. If she can only come up with one...well, then you''ve got your winner!

 

[FireGoddess]

I would much rather have a say in picking my own setting. I think the idea of getting a stone in a temp setting for the actual proposal and then picking a setting together is the best one. That way she is surprised by the actual proposal but still gets something she loves.

 

[Mara]

Date: 5/30/2006 2:33:59 PM
Author: FireGoddess
I would much rather have a say in picking my own setting. I think the idea of getting a stone in a temp setting for the actual proposal and then picking a setting together is the best one. That way she is surprised by the actual proposal but still gets something she loves.

Ditto.

 

[Sparkle Boy]

This place is AWESOME.

Thanks for all the quick responses so far. I may have painted my girlfriend as too picky in my write up, but all the points echo what I have been thinking. I know she would love whatever I picked out, but it would be really fantastic to know that she had what she always dreamed about.

I may put together a little binder of all the research I have done, including all the pictures. Then I could write why I thought she would like certain aspects of each one. Things like "You picked out one that had milgraining when we were at the store in MN." She would know I had been paying attention.


I didn''t think it would be unanimous after 6 people, but that speaks volumes.

 

[KristyDarling]

Date: 5/30/2006 3:09:33 PM
Author: Sparkle Boy
This place is AWESOME.


Thanks for all the quick responses so far. I may have painted my girlfriend as too picky in my write up, but all the points echo what I have been thinking. I know she would love whatever I picked out, but it would be really fantastic to know that she had what she always dreamed about.


I may put together a little binder of all the research I have done, including all the pictures. Then I could write why I thought she would like certain aspects of each one. Things like ''You picked out one that had milgraining when we were at the store in MN.'' She would know I had been paying attention.



I didn''t think it would be unanimous after 6 people, but that speaks volumes.

Sparkle Boy, that is a GREAT idea!

How sweet and thoughtful is that?!? I could totally see you proposing with the diamond in a temp setting, and shortly after she says yes you would whip out the binder with pics of the ring styles she liked...she would be FLOORED!!!

 

[Odilia]

Date: 5/30/2006 3:19:00 PM
Author: KristyDarling

Date: 5/30/2006 3:09:33 PM
Author: Sparkle Boy
I may put together a little binder of all the research I have done, including all the pictures. Then I could write why I thought she would like certain aspects of each one. Things like ''You picked out one that had milgraining when we were at the store in MN.'' She would know I had been paying attention.

Sparkle Boy, that is a GREAT idea!

How sweet and thoughtful is that?!? I could totally see you proposing with the diamond in a temp setting, and shortly after she says yes you would whip out the binder with pics of the ring styles she liked...she would be FLOORED!!!

I agree. That could be the best of both worlds. And it could be so fun!

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/30/2006 3:09:33 PM
Author: Sparkle Boy
I may put together a little binder of all the research I have done, including all the pictures. Then I could write why I thought she would like certain aspects of each one. Things like ''You picked out one that had milgraining when we were at the store in MN.'' She would know I had been paying attention.

I

that idea!! One of the reason she''s probably "willing" to risk you picking out the setting is because she does trust that you''re paying attention to her likes/dislikes! A notebook, or a summary of different options YOU''VE considered -- before deciding, ultimately, that it would be romantic to choose it together (or let her choose) is the BEST IDEA I''ve heard in a long time. VERY considerate & romantic & awesome!

 

[KristyDarling]

Yay for Sparkle Boy! A+ for creativity and thoughtfulness!!!

Let us know what you end up deciding to do.

You know you have us all wrapped around your little finger now!

 

[Sparkle Boy]

I will keep this updated. I have about about 2 months until I plan to pop the question. I will start getting the notebook together. I guess I better run out and get some more printer cartridges.

 

[sk8rjen]

Oh I just LOVE your notebook idea and can''t wait to hear how it all goes ... one question though --- why must we all wait for 2 long months??? Ok, just kidding -- have fun putting this together -- your GF is a very lucky lady!

jen

 

[Sparkle Boy]

You asked for the story now you are going to get it.

I have time planned in to make a custom setting so now that I am not going that route I can get the ring earlier.

She is very close to her family, and they are 1100 miles away. She moved out here about two years ago, and is the first in her family to move over 1 hour away. She misses them greatly, but loves her job. They mean the world to her, and I love them too. About 6 months ago she invited me to join them for a vacation. Her whole family goes, brothers and sisters, parents, etc.... They rent a house together on the beach. I knew this would be the perfect time. She will love to share this moment with her family.

I don''t want to wait either, she is getting antsy, but I have to.

 

[KristyDarling]

Sparkle Boy, you are getting me all teary-eyed and excited for you! That sounds like the PERFECT time to pop the question! So much joy all around! When is this vacation?? (i.e., how long are we gonna have to wait for your engagement report???)

By the way, that eighternity rock you've picked out is a serious sparkler! Have you received it yet, or are you going to have GOG put it in a temp setting for you?

 

[FireGoddess]

Sounds like a great plan - and a wonderful way to get engaged and share it with her family!

 

[Kaleigh]

You are so sweet, she will love that!! Love the idea about the binder too, she''ll know how much attention you paid to what she likes. That''s awesome!!!

 

[Sparkle Boy]

I had 4 stones sent to a local appraiser so I could do a side by side comparison of size vs color vs different cuts. Of the ones I looked at the Eighternity stood out to me. I will have the eighternity in my hands tomorrow, but I will have to send it up to GOG to get it set in the temporary setting. I want to look at it for a while

Here is the thread where I detailed my selection process
Click Me

The vacation is at the end of July, we leave on my birthday, that may be the day.
I don''t know if I can hold out that long. You ladies will have to help me plan the perfect proposal.

 

[KristyDarling]

Date: 5/30/2006 5:54:45 PM
Author: Sparkle Boy
I had 4 stones sent to a local appraiser so I could do a side by side comparison of size vs color vs different cuts. Of the ones I looked at the Eighternity stood out to me. I will have the eighternity in my hands tomorrow, but I will have to send it up to GOG to get it set in the temporary setting. I want to look at it for a while


Here is the thread where I detailed my selection process

Click Me


The vacation is at the end of July, we leave on my birthday, that may be the day.

I don''t know if I can hold out that long. You ladies will have to help me plan the perfect proposal.

What?! We have to wait until the END OF JULY??? j/k. We''ll be as patient as we can and of course we''ll help you plan!

What do you have in mind so far?

 

[galeteia]

I totally agree with the idea of the temporary setting. That way, you have the surprise factor, the perfect moment, the ring, and give her a chance to pick out the setting.

 

[lizz]

I am so glad you are going to LET HER PICK the setting. How sweet.

 

[anchor31]

Good going, sparkle boy! I picked my own setting last Saturday and I am soooo thrilled! I really think it''s the best thing to do. Let us know how things go!

 

[Sparkle Boy]

Well I wired the money over for the stone today. I should get it next week. GOG is setting it in a simple 4 prong white gold setting for now.

How in the world am I going to be able to wait until the end of July to propose. On the bright side I can have some pictures up.

Here are the ones GOG sent today. The setting looks good to me. Can't wait to give it to her. Now I need tips on how to wait for two months.

 

[Sparkle Boy]

Now with picture goodness.

 

[FireGoddess]

 

[KristyDarling]

It''s gorgeous!!!! Great stone! And heck, when she sees it she may want to keep it in that classic solitaire setting! It is THAT pretty!

 

[lizz]

KD, I was thinking the same thing. I like it as is, but let her pick. What a beautiful stone!

I am sure she will be thrilled.

 

[anchor31]

What a beautiful stone! Congrats!