shape
carat
color
clarity

"Just Barely" Pregnant PS''ers

Discussion in 'Family, Home & Health' started by HOUMedGal, Nov 2, 2009.

  1. geri
    Shiny_Rock

    Messages:
    218
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    by geri » Dec 27, 2009
    Not great news for me at the OB this morning. Based on my U/s I measured at about 5 weeks when I was 6 weeks 5 days. He thinks it is likely I will miscarry but I have to go back for another U/S on Wednesday to find out for sure. I just wish the waiting was over.

    Hope everyone else is doing well.
     
  2. HOUMedGal
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,831
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2005
    by HOUMedGal » Dec 27, 2009
    Oh Geri, I am so sorry. I am sending all the healthy bean vibes that I''ve got your way. I know exactly what you''re feeling right now, and I know there''s not much I can say to make it better, so I''ll just send thoughts of peace and comfort. I hope so much that the measurements were off and that things are actually fine...and I know that the waiting is the hardest part. Big, big hugs to you, and know that I am thinking about you. If you wanna talk outside the barely preggo thread, start a "paging HOUMedGal" thread and I''ll be there!
     
  3. noelwr
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,961
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2008
    by noelwr » Dec 28, 2009
    geri - that really sucks! I don''t want to give you false hope, but since it''s so early on maybe it''s the same situation as oobiecoo we''re they''re just guessing. I would definitely take your husband with you on Wed.

    HOUMedGal - I was thinking about you the other day wondering if you were ok. glad to see you back here and it''s wonderful that you''re so supportive.

    my news today is that yesterday I started having some aches in my abdomen. today I got on the treadmill and after 10 min they came back, but stopped as soon as I stopped moving. I think it''s growing and stretching and my workout is using the same muscles. if it was something like menstrual cramps I would have just pushed on, but I think this is too delicate a situation so I will try again tomorrow.
     
  4. Puppmom
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    3,160
    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2007
    by Puppmom » Dec 28, 2009
    Geri, I''m so sorry to hear your news. Let''s just hope the measurements were off. When I had my U/S, I was surprised at how inexact it is. They are measuring something in millimeters basically with the click of a mouse! I hope everything turns out okay. I''ll be thinking about you.

    Noel, good for you for even working out! I just haven''t felt up to it. I am REALLY bloated and it''s making me terribly uncomfortable which means I don''t really feel like doing anything. As for the U/S - they may do internal and abdomen. They go REALLY low on the abdomen one - the tech had me unzip my pants and she said pull them down a bit which I did but she gave them a good yank and I was caught off guard! [​IMG] The good news is it''s dark in there.
     
    


    


  5. Mara
    Super_Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    31,003
    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2002
    by Mara » Dec 28, 2009
    geri i hope that the news this week is better, hang in there and think positive thoughts... i will too.

    noel you prob felt ligament stretching pains...i had those a lot in the first tri. it was a little worrisome for me because i didn''t know what they are so every time i felt something i was SURE it was something bad. but as i felt them more and more i felt better about them.

    the first trimester is so hard mentally esp if this is your first time being pregnant because everything is so foreign and you don''t know how to interpret what your body is doing. i remember sitting at my desk feeling ligament stretching going... is this bad? should i worry? was it what i ate? should i not work out? just do what feels comfortable for you, both physically and mentally.
     
  6. geri
    Shiny_Rock

    Messages:
    218
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    by geri » Dec 28, 2009
    Hi everyone. Thanks for the words and thoughts. It really does mean a lot. I''m trying be positive because there is a small chance they could be wrong but in my heart I think he is right - this pregnancy just hasn''t felt right for weeks but maybe my female intuition is also off.

    On another note - does anyone know of any information that may help SO understand how women might feel about miscarriage? He comes from a very stoic, don''t complain, just get over it and move on kind of family. While I know we need to do this in the long run, I''m not finding this particularly helpful at the moment and am trying to get him to understand that I may be emotional but that is normal and okay, at least for the time being.

    Now I get to put on my happy face and go to a wedding today! Hopefully it will take my mind of things, at least for a little while.

    Noelwr - good luck with the U/S today. I hope there is a pounding hearbeat.
     
  7. Burk
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    4,091
    Joined:
    May 9, 2006
    by Burk » Dec 28, 2009
    geri~So sorry! FWIW at my first u/s I measured 10 days behind my LMP date and I''m 33 weeks preggo now! Did you happen to have longer cycles? That''s what caused mine to be off a bit.
     
  8. dcgator
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,115
    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2008
    by dcgator » Dec 28, 2009
    Geri, I am sending lots of dust your way and hope that the cycle calculation is the real culprit here. Hugs

    Noel, that is soo very exciting about the family''s reaction, yeah for baby! I am not preggers and am not sure about the pains, but hopefully it is just what Mara is talking about.
     
  9. ChargerGrrl
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    2,865
    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2005
    by ChargerGrrl » Dec 28, 2009
    Geri- I''m sending lots of good vibes your way. Think positive thoughts!

    Noelwr- Ditto Mara on the ligament stretching pains. It''s a weird feeling and at first made me uneasy, but I recall reading about them (here on PS) and that put my mind at ease.
     
  10. Bliss
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    3,016
    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2008
    by Bliss » Dec 28, 2009
    Sorry I've been MIA, but I am so happy to see the new mamas and the original mamas with great progress!

    So exciting. [​IMG]

    Houie! I've missed you! I can't figure out how to send personal messages through this site - is that even possible? Have been thinking about you, sista!

    geri - lots of dust your way. Since you asked...I just wanted to post a link to a blog I came across when I was going through my m/c. Though it isn't polished in the written sense, it went straight to my heart. I hope it helps you and your DH, as it speaks to both men and women.
    Linky

    I hope with all of my heart you never even have to cross this bridge. Sending prayers your way for your baby bean, geri.

    Lots of love to you all and dust, too!
     
    


    


  11. noelwr
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,961
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2008
    by noelwr » Dec 28, 2009
    unfortunately I have sad news, too. [​IMG]

    our baby didn''t have a heart beat and they said it measured it 8.5 weeks, instead of 10. the size I''m not worried about, but I guess a missing heart beat is definitive.

    I''m actually not sad as I very much considered this possibility going into the appointment, but I am disappointed and feel bad for our family whom we got all excited, but of course I know they will understand.

    my mom asked if I should get a 2nd opinion. I''m not sure if that''s something you really need. we had 2 different docs looking, and I''m not sure I want to *see* more reconfirmation. the obstetrician will call me today/tomorrow to discuss how I want to proceed. I''d like the m/c to occur naturally but that means it needs to happen this week as I don''t want it to happen when I go back to work next week.

    geri - can we trade husbands for a day? [​IMG] I actually need mine to stop being sad because that just makes me sad. I want to be over this and start trying again.
     
  12. Laila619
    Super_Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    11,500
    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2008
    by Laila619 » Dec 29, 2009
    geri, hang in there! Sending positive vibes your way. Maybe you just have your O date a little off, and that''s why there''s the discrepancy. Hugs!
     
  13. lovelylulu
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    2,406
    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2005
    by lovelylulu » Dec 29, 2009
    geri - sending nothing but positive thoughts your way!!!!
     
  14. KimberlyH
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    7,485
    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2006
    by KimberlyH » Dec 29, 2009
    Geri, my husband is pretty stoic and while I know there was lots of sadness in his heart he didn''t show it when I miscarried. He felt it was his responsibility to be strong and present for me, which meant he grieved privately. Perhpas your husband is doing the same?

    Noel, I''m so very sorry for your loss. It''s hard to handle your own feelings on top of your partners. You''ll grieve and recover in your own ways. My very best to both of you during this difficult time.
     
  15. Mara
    Super_Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    31,003
    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2002
    by Mara » Dec 29, 2009
    oh noel, i am so sorry to hear the news. you could wait and see what your body does, but i am not sure re: timeline at this point if you are supposed to do something rather than wait to see how your body responds. you can always have them double check before doing anything.

    re: men ... i agree that a lot of times men do take it on themselves to be the strong stoic ones. also i think that men want to ''fix'' things and this is something they really can''t fix and if they are aware of that, it might make them seem even more detached. i would just lean on each other as much as possible, don''t skimp on affection as sometimes body language is the best way to convey things that can''t be said.

    bliss and HMG...hope you ladies are doing ok.
     
    


    


  16. geri
    Shiny_Rock

    Messages:
    218
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    by geri » Dec 29, 2009
    Noelwr- I am so sorry to hear your news. Best wishes for you and DH in getting through this.

    Absolutely we can swap husbands for a day! We had a better chat yesterday and I know he is trying to be strong for me, which is great, but I also need to know that he is saddened by this. He tells me he is but it is not apparent to me. I know I''m being unfair and just need to understand that he is dealing with this in his own way.

    I understand how you feel about wanting to resolve the miscarriage as soon as possible. I am also due back at work next week and was hoping to resolve it before then. The OB was talking about a D&C but the bleeding has started so I''m hoping it will resolve itself naturally before next week. It is likely to be a seriously career limiting move if work finds out I''m TTC so I really want to sort it out before I go back. The OB still wants me to do the scan this afternoon and see him afterwards so I guess I will have more of an idea then of what my options are.
     
  17. qtiekiki
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    3,876
    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2004
    by qtiekiki » Dec 29, 2009
    Noel
    I am sorry. Take care of yourself.
     
  18. geri
    Shiny_Rock

    Messages:
    218
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    by geri » Dec 29, 2009
    HOUMedgal and Bliss - Thanks for your support. I hope you are both doing okay. While I am sad, I think I am doing okay at the moment. I have known in my heart that a m/c was a likely outcome since the early test results so at least I was a little prepared for it. I still have my moments but hopefully once the m/c is complete, I will feel better about it.

    I was really worried about going to the wedding yesterday because there were quite a few little bubs and pregnant ladies but I actually really enjoyed it and it took my mind off things. Now I just need to decide whether I can face the parties we have on for the next couple of nights. If nothing else, at least I can drown my sorrows!

    Bliss - thanks for the link. It is simple but effective. I''ll show it to DH and see what he thinks.

    Here''s to a happy 2010 for all of us!!
     
  19. aqua_girl
    Rough_Rock

    Messages:
    9
    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2009
    by aqua_girl » Dec 29, 2009
    Hey everyone, just returned home and logged on to find out such sad news [​IMG]

    Geri and noelwr- I am so sorry to hear of your losses. There arent really the right words I can find to offer you comfort except that Im thinking of you guys and sending lots of healing dust to both of you. Take care of yourselves, and your significant others. I hope you can find the comfort in each other that you deserve.

    Lots of hugs.
     
  20. Bliss
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    3,016
    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2008
    by Bliss » Dec 29, 2009
    Oh, noelwr... I am so sorry to hear that you''re going through this. I am going to be sending you dust and prayers. I am hoping and praying that your bean will be OK. You never know...

    geri, stay strong! I am glad that you are feeling better. Still, it can be easier or harder depending on your mood and hormones. Just take it as easy as possible. ((hugs)) Some days, I would be fine and others I would wake up crying after having dinner with a pregnant friend. It was wonky with all the hormones.

    Mara, thank you sista! I''m so excited for you!!!! [​IMG] You have helped us all so much with your funny and witty comments to your wealth of very very very very useful information. You''re like Mother Goose already! To us! Thank you!

    To all the mamas, lots of dust and prayers to you.
     
  21. somethingshiny
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    6,746
    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2007
    by somethingshiny » Dec 29, 2009
    Noel~ I''m so sorry to hear your news. I am in tears over how many babies have been lost in the past few weeks. You and your DH and family are in my prayers.

    geri~ More prayers for you. I understand about the pregnancy not feeling right. JT was the first pregnancy that we told people about and now this one. I just knew the others weren''t going to happen. I still think there''s hope for you bean, but I believe that we''re very attuned to our bodies during pregnancy. I think DH''s try to be SOO supportive that they can come off as uncaring. Also, for an early loss, I don''t think a lot of people get that it''s a BABY. They just consider it a failed pregnancy. I would explain to your DH that this is a baby and that if you lose him/her, you will be grieving the loss of a child. Don''t make him feel like he has to grieve in the same way but let him know that it''s okay for him to grieve too.

    HOU and Bliss~ Glad you ladies stopped in. You''ve still been in my thoughts. I hope you''re doing well.


    I still have MS but I think my vitamins are a contributing factor. My sore boobs have stopped (I''m around 11.5 weeks) which I know is basically on schedule, but still has me nervous. I have lots of the ligament stretching though (which I am able to identify this time around!)

    My prayers are with all of you.
     
  22. HOUMedGal
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,831
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2005
    by HOUMedGal » Dec 29, 2009
    My goodness, so much to say...

    Noelwr, I am so so sorry to hear your news too. Gosh. Big big hugs to you and your husband. You''re right, the lack of a heartbeat is what my doc considered the confirmation that it was over. While our baby still had a heartbeat (albeit slow), we had to keep coming back for weekly ultrasounds until finally, at our 3rd ultrasound the heartbeat was gone, and I was scheduled for a D&C on the first day that she could get me in. Of course, waiting for my body to take care of things naturally was an option, too, but she offered the D&C in case I just wanted to get it over with. I never started bleeding on my own, so I was glad to have the D&C to get it over with and be able to move on more quickly. I am also a working woman, and it''s hard for me to get time off, especially if it''s unpredictable time off, so a planned D&C was the best way to go, and I only missed 2 days of work. But it is a very personal decision...many women prefer to keep things as natural as possible. As far as a second opinion, there is nothing wrong with getting one if you want to, if it will make you feel better. If you want one more ultrasound from one more doctor, go get it. Doctors are only human, and they make mistakes sometimes. And if you need more confirmation in order to feel right about the decisions you have to make, then you should absolutely seek it. However, there''s also nothing wrong with accepting what the doctors saw today if that''s what feels right to you. I understand what you mean about not wanting to see more confirmation. I was so ready for things to just be over and move on by the time my D&C happened...the weeks of waiting between our first indication that anything was wrong and finally having the D&C were the worst part. Don''t forget to allow yourself to feel the emotions that come on....sometimes I felt completely OK and ready to try again RIGHT NOW, and other times I just had to cry about it. I will be thinking of you as you think things over and talk with your OB tomorrow about how you''d like to proceed. We''re all here for you!

    Geri, I''ve been thinking of you a lot. There were times when I felt my husband wasn''t "sad enough" too....especially moments when I was feeling inwardly sad but not necessarily expressing it, while he was prancing around the house being his usual jovial self....the thing I had to do in those moments was tell him that I was feeling sad, and that I needed a hug/to be held/to talk about things, and he pretty much got the message. I guess the best thing you can do is just be open with him about what you''re feeling, because he may just not realize that you''re having a "moment", yanno? And I think you''re right, once everything is really OVER you will start to feel better. At least that''s how it was for me...once I got past my D&C and got back to work I started to feel better. I had a few glasses of wine (drowning your sorrows is definitely not overrated!! hehe), decided I''m going to focus on losing at least 10 lbs before I get preggo again, and tone up these flabby muscles (LOL!)...having a new focus and a new goal definitely helped me to move on. I hope you had a good visit with the OB today, and were able to get some closure or maybe at least a plan of action. If you are seriously wanting to guarantee that this is all over before you go back to work next week, a D&C may be the better way to go. Natural miscarriages can last for a couple weeks, with unpredictable and varying amounts of bleeding and pain, whereas while you may bleed for a couple weeks after a d&c, it''s usually light flow. I took the day of my D&C and the next day off (Tues and Wed), and I was back to work on Thursday with no problems whatsoever besides feeling tired. Of course, as I said above, it is totally a personal decision and I''m certainly not trying to push a D&C on you...just wanted you to know that I''m pleased with how quick and convenient mine was, and I also appreciated the closure it brought me.

    Mara, thanks for thinking of me! I''m doing OK. I feel like I''ve moved on, for the most part. Every now and then I get kinda sad, but it goes away pretty quickly, and the length between the sad moments is getting longer and longer. Now I''ve just got to decide when we want to start trying again. Part of me really wants to try ASAP, but on the other hand, part of me is like, let''s wait a little longer, go on a couple more vacations together sans-baby, etc. All I know right now is that I''m not 100% sure on when....but it''s only been 2 weeks since my d&c so there''s plenty of time to figure it out.

    Blissie!! I''ve missed you too! I can call you Blissie, right?!?! hehe! I have thought several times about starting a "Paging Bliss" thread since we can''t PM on here because I''ve wondered how you''re doing and I wanted to compare noted with my pregnancy/miscarriage twin, but thought this thread may not be the best place to do that. It seems like you''re doing well...I''m glad to see that! I''m doing well too. We have got to catch up!

    Maybe we should start a different thread if there''s going to be a lot of pregnancy loss talk...I feel bad about using the barely preggo thread to discuss our losses. Yes, early pregnancy loss is fairly common, but I don''t wanna freak out all the newly pregnant mommas!! I felt so bad because I feel like we did scare poor Puppmom...and I was so glad on the day when she posted about her fantastic heart rate and perfect measurements!! :) :) What do you guys think...new thread for pregnancy loss?

    Lots of healthy baby dust to all you new preggos!! :) And congrats to anyone I may have missed in the last few weeks!!!
     
  23. somethingshiny
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    6,746
    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2007
    by somethingshiny » Dec 29, 2009
    Another thought on miscarriages. Sorry, I know this is hard on everyone reading and of course much worse on those going through it.

    After the physical miscarriage your body takes several days to weeks to get your hormones back to "normal." During that time, the "post partum depression" kind of symptoms happen too. You may feel worse that you could have imagined because you''re grieving the loss and your hormones are making it so much worse. Dr''s will prescribe temp anti-depressants if you feel they''re necessary. Some women find that going on the pill for a couple cycles evens out their moods quickly.
     
  24. geri
    Shiny_Rock

    Messages:
    218
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    by geri » Dec 29, 2009
    HOUMedgal - I think we should start a new thread and will do that now.

    To all the others here and their little beans, I genuinely wish you all the dust in the world and will pop back in from time to time to see how you are all doing.
     
  25. noelwr
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,961
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2008
    by noelwr » Dec 29, 2009
    ok - I''ll go post on the new thread...

    BUT

    I still want to hear all the good news.

    somethingshiny - 11.5 weeks is good, right?!? I mean comparitively speaking to history. that deserves a big [​IMG]

    oobiecoo - any news to put smiles on our faces?

    I think puppmom and chargergirl already moved on to the preggers thread.
     
  26. Puppmom
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    3,160
    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2007
    by Puppmom » Dec 30, 2009
    Gosh, guys. I am so sorry. There have been so many losses lately. It really is overwhelming. I''m so glad you all have wonderful DHs and SOs to help you through this.

    HMG, I''m already terrified...nothing anyone here said or did. [​IMG] It''s just in my nature to be anxious about things...so much so that I almost can''t trust my instincts. I''m working on having a better attitude because I really have no control over the outcome and don''t want to be miserable for the next 8 months! My latest fear is that I don''t "feel" pregnant. My breast are less sore than they were and the little bit of queasiness I had has subsided. Some of the gals in the preggo thread mentioned that their symptoms came and went so that''s reassuring. We see the doctor on the 10th at which time I''ll be 10 weeks...hopefully we get to hear the babies heart again. The next week and a half is going to drag!
     
  27. luthergirl
    Rough_Rock

    Messages:
    100
    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2005
    by luthergirl » Dec 30, 2009
    First of all I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the ladies that have gone through difficult times recently--my thoughts and prayers are with you all!

    I''m a little nervous to even be contributing to this thread as this all still seems a little unreal!

    Found out 12/26 that we were pregnant after 2 tests....we were not trying so it was a surprise...I certainly feel beyond blessed and a little bit guilty as I have a few friends that have been trying for awhile. My husband was happy about it and we are both getting pretty excited.

    Here is where it gets tricky....since we weren''t trying I am really not sure how far along I am AT ALL :) I know when the first day of my last p was, but I just don''t think I could be that far along...(10 weeks). My cycles are usually longer at an average of 33 days, and they have been all over the board with the most recent one being 43 days. I took a test 2.5 weeks ago and it came back negative, though I did take it in the middle of the day.
    I guess I think I started noticing pregnancy symptoms about 3 weeks ago and just thought it was PMS. I have a dr. appt for next Monday and hopefully she will be able to help me determine how far along I am, I just get worried since babies can measure behind, etc. if we can really determine a due date with accuracy, especially since my body doesn''t seem all that regular. Whew...enough about me! It is just so hard when it is early and you are not telling ANYONE!

    Nice to have a few other ladies to talk to who are going through the same things!
     
  28. noelwr
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,961
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2008
    by noelwr » Dec 30, 2009
    luthergirl - whoo hoo! congrats! that surely is a nice x-mas present. when you go to the doc, take all your dates along (not just when you had LMP but also when you first felt symptoms and when you first got positive pregnancy test and also the negative one). I think if you are really 10 weeks along you would surely have had a positive test 2.5 weeks ago, regardless when in the day you took it. I wouldn't feel guilty towards your friends. that's just the way nature happens and there's nothing anyone can do about it. if you think it will be sensitive, maybe don't mention to them that you weren't really trying...
     
  29. somethingshiny
    Ideal_Rock

    Messages:
    6,746
    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2007
    by somethingshiny » Dec 30, 2009
    Congrats, luthergirl!! Ditto to noel, I think your test would have been positive if you were 10 weeks now, but we could be wrong. I also agree with noel on NOT telling friends that you weren''t trying. Obviously you weren''t on the pill, you had irregular cycles, so it''s definitely a surprise because you probably weren''t sure if you were even fertile. As one of the "trying friends" for many years, of course it was difficult to hear about friends who just happened to get pregnant. However, your trying friends will still be so happy to hear your news. Obviously they love babies, right?!



    SO, I switched from my RX prenatal to a Walmart prenatal. I already feel better after being off the RX for a couple days. Hopefully that''s all it''ll take to alleviate this MS once and for all.
     
  30. noelwr
    Brilliant_Rock

    Messages:
    1,961
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2008
    by noelwr » Dec 30, 2009
    somethingshiny - what''s the difference between the 2 prenatals? maybe I''ll purchase some when I''m in the States in Feb as vitamins are not cheap!
     

Share This Page