Is this rude?

[Gypsy]

Oh I'm sorry to dash your hopes, but I just have visions of kids hurting themselves and wanted to warn you. I know what it is like to get excited about a place, though, so I'm glad the place might work for a rehearsal dinner. And I'm really sorry the 3rd place doesn't feel right.

As for the wedding I mentioned. What happened was the mother of the bride is... well, she's a bit of a snot and the groom (and is family) were of a different religion than the bride's family. So the mother of the bride refused to let the mother of the groom have ANYTHING to do with the wedding. Which made the Mother of the Groom sad and mad because a) she loves the bride like a daughter and wanted to be a part of the wedding planning and b) because she knew WHY the mother of the groom was being a PITA (the religious differences). So the MOG decided to make the rehearsal dinner as nice an event as she could. She didn't have dancing at the rehearsal, but that and the bride in a white dress were the only things missing from the rehearsal. It was a really lovely event. If my wedding is as nice as that rehearsal, I'll be thrilled. But it still, it was odd that the rehearsal was nicer. And I think EVERYONE knew about the drama and conflict... so, like I said awkward. Still, they are happily married with two BEAUTIFUL daughters, and that's all that matters.

 

[pocahontas]

Choro,

Like mtlgal, I’ve also been a guest on the balcony so I’ll offer my two cents for what it’s worth. To be honest, at first, my FI and the other balcony guests (about 18 of us in total) joked about being seated in the reject section. But, after looking around and assessing the situation we all realized that the bride and groom had intentionally placed their close younger, coupled friends together in an area where we could drink and mingle better. Not to mention the fact that the separation of our area allowed us the freedom to be a bit rowdier. I have to say that we ended up having a great time, and the views of the venue and of the bridal table were actually really amazing! Obviously, this may translate differently for your FFIL’s guests because it may be obvious that you've tucked them away from the main event so I’m a bit torn about what the right decision is. Sorry, I guess this post wasn’t much help

 

[miraclesrule]

I''ve only been to one reception at a community center on the beach that had an upstairs area. The difference with that set up was that the guests could hear everything and they could probably have even seen the head table from there view point. All I thought when I walked in was "Man, she better not have me seated up here"? Of course she didn''t, but she was one of my best friends.

Some of the venues that we visited for my daughters reception were too small for our guest list even though they advertised that they could accomodate. When we got there, we discovered that many of the guests would be outside the room on a patio situated next to the back of the kitchen. We didn''t like it all, so even though they had the best food at that venue, we declined.

Ultimately, you have to go with your gut. Sit down where they will be sitting and see how you feel. If they are all sitting with people they know, it probably won''t be seen as rude. If you sit random single guests or all parents of friends, then....eh...maybe they feel slighted, but they would probably understand.

 

[ringster]

Date: 6/8/2008 2:43:30 PM
Author: choro72

The con of this place is that it''s not our taste,

....

It''s just so...manicured, formal, and normal for our taste. I don''t feel at home.

can you still keep looking choro? it just sounds like you don''t really like this third venue and even though it is good to think of the guests... it is YOUR wedding and you should like your venue esp as you are paying good money for it. when you write that you don''t feel at home, that makes me really worried that you may have to sacrifice too much of your wants for this place.

 

[choro72]

Thanks ringster. I really like this place...It''s just that we''ve seen some places that we like better, and that always put a damper on things. The old saying of "Beggars can''t be choosers" ring certainly true to our case. I like the place enough, and we certainly can''t beat the price tag. It''s a golf course, so it will be beautiful.

The problem I''m having now is the contact. I''m trying to call them to get certain information from them, but they only allow me to talk to the person that we met when we went for the tour, and this person is incredibly hard to reach. We may be on a budget, but I am not willing to sacrifice service for anything. We''re going to make the decision this weekend, so I''ll see how contacting with her this week goes.

I appreciate your concern, and for the above reason we may have to keep looking...