Is Money Important toYou?

[ksinger]

Date: 6/21/2010 11:40:34 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 6/21/2010 10:20:25 PM
Author: ksinger

Date: 6/21/2010 10:15:39 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 6/21/2010 8:44:06 PM
Author: packrat

Just having a million dollars wouldn''t make me happy. Using that money to help others and do good things *would*.

agree!

good reason to donate your $$$s to the DF diamond fund.

Oh come on DF, you should still be able to get at least a couple thou from that run-down piece of crap Lange & Sohne of yours.

oh come on Karen,imagine all the good karmas that will be heading your way after you put a big smile on DF''s face.

DF, I could NEVER wrack up good karma by helping another have and even greater attachment to THINGS. Surely you know this cosmic law. I''d come back as a bug. You''d come back as a bug. Sp, when I don''t buy you that diamond, please believe that I''m only helping us BOTH out.

 

[Jennifer W]

Date: 6/22/2010 4:15:51 AM
Author: Cehrabehra
Time is more important that money, love is more important than money, people are more important than money, health is more important than money, actually almost everything is more important than money. Money for money''s sake is a total waste. The only thing it really has going for it is buying potential and it isn''t until you actualized that potential that it truly has value. Money alone is absolutely worthless to me.

I agree with this - time is so important to me. When I''ve hit a certain income level in the past, I''ve dropped my hours at work or gone into a jobshare arrangement. I suppose then that time for myself and my family is more precious than money after a certain point or comfort level.

Jen

 

[Circe]

Honestly, anybody who says money doesn''t matter is either entitled or fooling themselves.

Have you guys read John Scalzi''s list, On Being Poor? I grew up poor but not knowing it, a la KSinger''s excellent post, and way too many of the things on that list resonated for me.

Now, I don''t believe that the opposite of poor is rich: I chose to get an English Ph.D., for the love of Mike, because the additional security of a few mill in savings, or whatever, does not outweigh the glorious luxury of intellectual satisfaction and labor.

But I do need enough money to care for myself and my loved ones. That''s non-negotiable. Previously, I would have said I needed enough money "for independence," but being married is messing with my views on that, circumstantially and philosophically.

P.S. - Monarch, your dad is a wise man. I''m writing that one down.

 

[missy]

To fully answer the question by luckynumber:

Is Money Important toYou?
And name one thing that is more important than money to you, and one thing that is only A BIT less important....

Money is not important to me as long as I have enough for food, shelter and comfort...basic needs. I agree that not having enough money to cover these basic things would suck.

One thing that is more important than money is health (mine and my loved ones'' health).

One thing that is a bit less important...I cannot think of anything less important so I will borrow what another poster said and that is what people who don''t know me think of me.

I love this quote...author unkown

The real measure of your wealth is how much you''d be worth if you lost all your money.

and ofc this one by Coco Chanel

There are people who have money and people who are rich.

and I would like to add that for many people it is just never enough. It seems (most)everyone wants more money (no matter their income) thinking it will make them happier. I was guilty of this too in the past but no longer feel this way.

 

[missy]

ETA:
I am thankful for all my very many blessings and feel very fortunate indeed. And money is the least of my fortune.

 

[steph72276]

I think this thread is confusing in the sense that it is not clear if we are talking about money as in having enough for basics, or having money as in having an abundance of money. I think we can all agree that it is important to have enough money to cover basics at the very least. No one WANTS to live in poverty of course. I think where the difference comes in is where the line is drawn where happiness is no longer related to money. Dreamer, I have seen that study before (although I thought it was $50k USD, but I could be wrong). I think it is true for me. After all my family's basic needs are taken care of with some extra to be able to do a few things, I don't see where my happiness would go up or down exponentially based on how much money I have. When I first met my husband, we were both poor college students living on $8/hour jobs. When we first got married, I was just starting out as a teacher and he was just starting out his career at the bottom of the food chain. I look back on those times and remember how much fun we had just renting a movie and having taco night in our 1 bedroom apartment. We were both very happy, and now that he has moved up the ladder, yes we were able to buy a nice house and go on some trips every now and then, but I don't think I am more happy now. I live simply (for the most part) and don't need THINGS to make me happy. It's the people I experience life with that make me the most happy.

ETA: My husband and I are big on not having any debts and saving for retirement so we can be taken care of later in life, so in that sense yes money is important, but no it does not equal happiness.

 

[AdiS]

Date: 6/21/2010 8:57:00 PM
Author: FL Steph
If money bought happiness, you wouldn''t see so very many celebrities go on downward spirals that they do. Money is important to an extent to survive and live comfortably, but it doesn''t buy you (real) love, it only buys you things.

I agree with this completely. Money is important to me as long as I can live comfortably and that''s about it. There are so many things that don''t have anything to do with wealth, that are infinitely more valuable to me. Basic needs like food, shelter and bills aside, I can live without luxury. I can live without my diamonds, my vacations and travels, my designer clothes and bags. I don''t think I can live without my husband and my family though. I''d rather be healthy and loved (which to me equals happiness) than rich. And I really don''t agree money can buy you happiness. It can keep you satisfied, it can provide substitutes for the other things you lack and fill the holes in your soul with next best things, but real happiness? I don''t think so.

My aunt is rich. Rich like "I don''t feel like working today. I feel like going to Venice" and she''s on the first flight to Italy. She''s a really successful business lady who''s earned every penny with hard work. She now has the means to live life however she likes. And I don''t think she''s ever been happy. First, the love of her life broke her heart and left her for another woman. Then a few years later she got pregnant by her then boyfriend and when the jerk found out, he took off.

My aunt gave birth at the most expensive private clinic in town, usually reserved only for celebrities. She had almost half a floor closed down only for her needs and an horde of doctors and nurses, ready to filfil her every wish. She cried when her daughter was born. And not with happy tears only. To this day, my little cousin has never seen her father, but she keeps asking about him.

Then my aunt was diagnosed with cancer and almost left her girl an orphan. She made it and is ok now, but I think something deep inside her is already broken. She loves her daughter and says she''s her whole world. She gives a lot to charity. She travels often and loves buying gifts to her family. She''s satisfied with her life. But she''s not happy and we can all see it. For all her money, I think life has damaged her too badly and it pains me to say it, but I don''t think she can be truly happy anymore. I still hope I''d be proven wrong though.

So yeah, money=happiness? I don''t believe it for a second.

 

[Sha]

Date: 6/22/2010 8:37:07 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/21/2010 8:57:00 PM
Author: FL Steph
If money bought happiness, you wouldn''t see so very many celebrities go on downward spirals that they do. Money is important to an extent to survive and live comfortably, but it doesn''t buy you (real) love, it only buys you things.

I agree with this completely. Money is important to me as long as I can live comfortably and that''s about it. There are so many things that don''t have anything to do with wealth, that are infinitely more valuable to me. Basic needs like food, shelter and bills aside, I can live without luxury. I can live without my diamonds, my vacations and travels, my designer clothes and bags. I don''t think I can live without my husband and my family though. I''d rather be healthy and loved (which to me equals happiness) than rich. And I really don''t agree money can buy you happiness. It can keep you satisfied, it can provide substitutes for the other things you lack and fill the holes in your soul with next best things, but real happiness? I don''t think so.

My aunt is rich. Rich like ''I don''t feel like working today. I feel like going to Venice'' and she''s on the first flight to Italy. She''s a really successful business lady who''s earned every penny with hard work. She now has the means to live life however she likes. And I don''t think she''s ever been happy. First, the love of her life broke her heart and left her for another woman. Then a few years later she got pregnant by her then boyfriend and when the jerk found out, he took off.

My aunt gave birth at the most expensive private clinic in town, usually reserved only for celebrities. She had almost half a floor closed down only for her needs and an horde of doctors and nurses, ready to filfil her every wish. She cried when her daughter was born. And not with happy tears only. To this day, my little cousin has never seen her father, but she keeps asking about him.

Then my aunt was diagnosed with cancer and almost left her girl an orphan. She made it and is ok now, but I think something deep inside her is already broken. She loves her daughter and says she''s her whole world. She gives a lot to charity. She travels often and loves buying gifts to her family. She''s satisfied with her life. But she''s not happy and we can all see it. For all her money, I think life has damaged her too badly and it pains me to say it, but I don''t think she can be truly happy anymore. I still hope I''d be proven wrong though.

So yeah, money=happiness? I don''t believe it for a second.

Hmmmm......

So sad... I''m so sorry for your aunt.

This is an interesting thread. I love that we can have these type of philosophical discussions on PS.

I can relate to Freke''s post about not being able tp buy things that I''d want to, travel etc. That really makes me feel frustrated and resentful at times. I was sitting here wondering if it makes me ''unhappy'', though...? I wouldn''t say unhappy. Even though I can''t buy a lot of the things I want right now (my clothes and shoes are old, no savings etc.), I''m happy because I have my husband and daughter around me, as well as my immediate family and friends. I wonder if I would feel differently if my basic needs weren''t met, though...? Hmmm..... if things didn''t get excessively bad, I think I''d stil lbe mostly happy, to tell you the truth, although I would be feeling more stressed and pressured about life overall. Hmmmm..... still thinking about it.

 

[Autumnovember]

Date: 6/21/2010 9:52:11 PM
Author: dreamer_d
Only people who have lots of money would say it is not important to them

If you have ever been poor in your life, there is no question in your mind that money is very important.

I disagree. My family has always been middle-upper class. And we were on the lower end of that spectrum. Growing up, I dealt with my parents being laid off etc. There were times where they REALLY had no funds and it was very difficult. However, the struggle has made us an incredibly strong family and has taught us what values we prioritize first. Money is not on the top of the list.

SO is very very very financially stable, and is what most people would consider "wealthy". So dating someone who is the complete opposite of what my family has been has allowed me to see the other side. Money IS nice. It does allow SO and I to do things that I am sure people that do not have money, cannot do.

Regardless, I have maintained my values as they were before I met him.

I think it just depends on the person..

 

[isaku5]

Date: 6/21/2010 3:31:47 PM
Author: monarch64
Yes, money is important to me. My father always told me this: the most important thing in life is your health, the next most important thing is love, and the third most important thing is money so you can take care of the first two things.

Your dad is a very wise man!!

 

[Jennifer W]

Date: 6/22/2010 11:21:55 AM
Author: Autumnovember

Date: 6/21/2010 9:52:11 PM
Author: dreamer_d
Only people who have lots of money would say it is not important to them

If you have ever been poor in your life, there is no question in your mind that money is very important.

I disagree. My family has always been middle-upper class. And we were on the lower end of that spectrum. Growing up, I dealt with my parents being laid off etc. There were times where they REALLY had no funds and it was very difficult. However, the struggle has made us an incredibly strong family and has taught us what values we prioritize first. Money is not on the top of the list.

SO is very very very financially stable, and is what most people would consider ''wealthy''. So dating someone who is the complete opposite of what my family has been has allowed me to see the other side. Money IS nice. It does allow SO and I to do things that I am sure people that do not have money, cannot do.

Regardless, I have maintained my values as they were before I met him.

I think it just depends on the person..

I don''t agree with it either. I''ve been dirt poor. I''ve checked many of the items on the list Circe posted. I''ve lived in the roughest block in the roughest part of Glasgow (if you''ve ever been to Glasgow, you''ll know just how bad that is...) and still barely made the rent. When I moved out, the building was torn down because even the homeless shelter declined to take it over.

I''m maintained my values too and I have learned that I can survive just about anything. I think having had nothing at times in my life, it reassures me that I could cope again with nothing if I had to. Not saying I''d like to, but just that there are more important things to me than money.

I''d second what Steph said too - some of my happiest memories are of times when I had very, very little money. I enjoy the things I can buy now, but I can live without them again if I have to.

Jen

 

[luckynumber]

hello all,

the question was left deliberately vague, so it would stimulate the kind of debate it has.

very interesting stuff, keep it coming!

 

[lucyandroger]

I do agree with Dreamer and Circe. Of course money is important.

I think people on a diamond forum may have a different idea of what it means to "not have money" than the general population...just saying.

My FI and I are having lots of discussions right now about how important money is to us and at what point we can take jobs that will make us happier but provide a lower income. I would say time is more important than money but I''m not living what I preach at the moment. Talk to me again after the student loans are paid off.

 

[icekid]

Sure money is important, but of course there have been studies that show beyond $X it does not contribute to increased happiness. I''ve worked my butt off in a career that generally results in a pretty well-paying career. However, the more hours I work, the less the money matters at the end. But I do have some crazy school loans to pay, though. Money is not worth all of my free time. And my family and health are FAR more important.

 

[purselover]

Yes money is important to me ....slightly more important is time to spend that money, if I don''t have time for vacations/dinners out/shopping what''s the point? Slightly less important, probably my husband. If I had to chose between DH or being poor forever, it was nice being married while it lasted.

 

[JSM]

Of course money is important to me. It doesn''t create happiness but it sure can make life easier! Though I believe that ultimately, happiness must come from within.


I think sometimes it''s easier for those of us who grew up with less than perfect means to appreciate life''s little pleasures. I''d consider myself lower middle class at the moment, and that''s what I grew up as. So no, I don''t really go out to dinner, or take extravagant vacations, or buy designer clothes. But I never did, so I don''t feel like I''m missing out. And I feel like happiness is internal anyway; though we don''t have a lot of extras, we have everything we need and more - shelter, food, clothing, computers and the internet! - and I''m cool with that.

On the other hand, DH grew up very very poor. They didn''t get new shoes or clothes even when he grew, they sometimes had no electricity, they went days without food at times. But between the two of us, he''s more dissatisfied with our current living situation. Sometimes I have to remind him that even though we don''t have a boat, a yard for a dog we''d like to get, a fancy truck for him to drive, the brand new gadget that his friend can afford, etc, we DO have so much more than a lot of people, and certainly more than he used to have.

I''m perplexed by his discontent at times, though I do appreciate his desire and motivation to improve our situation. I just don''t think that a house (or whatever material item he''s yearning for at the time) will really change our lives that substantially. Will it make life better? Probably, but maybe not to the extent he hopes it will.

 

[Arkteia]

Yes! In my mind, money equates with certain degree of independence, and independence is extremely important to me.

 

[hihowareyou]

I''ve been thinking about this a lot since my first response.

There have been times in my life when I have been very well off (by proxy, my parents are well off) and times (like right now) where I need to know how much everything costs and need to sit down at the start of each week and work out a budget so it doesn''t get to thursday and we have an empty car with no money left in our wallets to fill up.

In some ways money is more important to me now that I don''t have a lot than it ever was before because I am so much more conscious of it. Every time I buy anything I am very aware of the transaction and where it fits into my life. On the other hand I have never cared less about being rich. The pursuit of wealth used to consume me, I was embarrassed to be renting because to me success was owning my own home, etc. I still care about those things in terms of my long term financial security but I have 30-40 years to achieve those goals slowly and they don''t define who I am anymore. My happiness today is defined in much simpler terms, like the decision to smile in the morning

.