I'm married to an introvert engineer, one of my kids is HFA and the other is an engineer/scientist...out of habit I don't usually do broad definitions for anything, lol.
I grew up(junior/highschool) in VT. It's tiny and very homogeneous.It’s great that they’re pushing the agenda, my point was more that despite doing so (and apparently for years now), their corporate staff appear to be 99% white. That’s what makes me question their motives for these statements, because as an organization they don’t seem to be truly living these values.
If the social media trend of brands speaking up, whatever their motives, actually does drive change then obviously that’s incredible and it needs to happen. But if a business isn’t posting a black square or an “open letter” on their social channels then maybe it’s because it means more to them than image, and maybe they feel they have work to do in this area before they have a right to speak out...Does that make sense?! Not sure I’m articulating myself very well here to be honest.
We are indeed on different planes. I feel absolutely no need whatsoever to change or present myself differently in order to be accepted or to fit the circumstances...not because of low self esteem, not because of fear, not insecurity, or trying to be something I'm not.
People like/accept me or they don't. I like most people and accept them as well. People who 'mask' are fake people. What you see is not really who they are...that is the entire point of the article you linked. The word FAKE is in the subtitle!!! 'Inauthentic', 'Impostor' and 'Fake' are all key words used in the body of the article as well, for a reason. The article is not pro- masking or even suggesting that everyone does this. It encourages people to shed their masks and be authentic because keeping a mask up is not presented as an emotionally healthy state.
If anyone feels like they need to even sometimes live behind a mask I would suggest seeking out some professional guidance on how to live more authentically and deal with what is behind that mask. And I don't say that to be mean or flippant. I do know a few people who live behind masks...one in particular does this to an extreme. And another couple who do this even in their marriage. They are all dysfunctional in their relationships, as expected, given they often are not being honest with others or even themselves. They often perceive that others are 'masking' with them as well. Even the people who don't see the mask are not really their 'friends' because they only know the mask and the mask is not real. The one guy....well I don't know if he'll every be real. I've known him for over 30 years and I don't know if I've ever seen the mask come down....he fits everything in that article to a T. He's the saddest and least real person I know.
The couple is at a breaking point now where they realize that being inauthentic is not sustainable for marriage or any relationship. I've been spending a lot of time with her (as have other friends) as she works through this with professional guidance. It's a rocky road for sure. She looked at me one day with confusion and said "Sometimes I don't know how to read you." When I replied that she didn't have to 'read me' because I mean what I say she was even more confused. She is slowly finding comfort in recognizing that she can be herself and we all still love her. I believe she and her husband have a chance of becoming authentic people and saving their marriage. Even the baby steps of transformation so far have been wonderful to see.
Be yourself, no mask. There's good, bad and ugly in all of us...but accept yourself and others for who they are. If you don't like something about yourself, feel you have to hide or change how you present yourself to fit the circumstance or to be accepted...please don't mask. That isn't helping because it isn't real. Change yourself or change the circumstances....you'll be much happier being an authentic person.
We do.. that is life. Sorry it doesn't go with what you believe, but at times WE ALL put on a mask. Your friend, ask her if she defines herself as a black woman and will vote for Biden because a vote for Trump is a vote against black Americans imo. And Joe had a good point, 'aint black' because Biden understands legislation, he himself has changed his opinion after being more educated, as times changed.. So Sheila may be a rare black American imo.I'll try again...I said she doesn't define herself by her race. It's not even in a description/introduction I've heard her give of herself. Of course she knows she's black and I'm sure she thinks about it. However, (although I have not and would never ask who she would vote for) I suspect Joe Biden would say she 'ain't black' at all.
"...we all put on a face in public..." That is quoting your post.
I was wrong. I came across two examples of businesses that profess to support Black rights and pledged donations, but have histories of discriminating against Black employees. These are just companies that were called out; god knows how many others have also behaved like this but weren't outed. This is not okay.I don’t need business owners to be sincere in their beliefs as long as they put their money where their mouth is. Worthy causes still benefit from it, and losing that support can be very detrimental. The nonprofit I volunteer at was forced to lay off staff when a corporate sponsor pulled out of an annual fundraiser. That’s how much of an impact it can have.
If I was choosing between two products with similar features, but one brand donated a percentage of sales to support protesters and the other didn’t, then I know which one I would buy. It’s not being gullible, it’s being pragmatic and strategic to support causes I care about.
Even if donations weren’t involved, I’d still support brands that publicly denounce racism and facism. They likely piss off Trump and I’m down with that.
You're right, it's not OK, that's why I'm so skeptical of all of these businesses coming out of the woodwork in support, and I believe none of them. I was going to respond to your original post stating that you don't need business owners to be sincere (because I do), but I can only be embroiled in so many things at once while maintaining my time-consuming hobby called work.I was wrong. I came across two examples of businesses that profess to support Black rights and pledged donations, but have histories of discriminating against Black employees. These are just companies that were called out; god knows how many others have also behaved like this but weren't outed. This is not okay.
What can I say? I’ve had a lot of practice being wrong.You're right, it's not OK, that's why I'm so skeptical of all of these businesses coming out of the woodwork in support, and I believe none of them. I was going to respond to your original post stating that you don't need business owners to be sincere (because I do), but I can only be embroiled in so many things at once while maintaining my time-consuming hobby called work.
I appreciate your bringing this to light and being honest about it. Your star just went up a notch in my estimation, which of course means nothing to anyone....