I'm considering (finally) learning how to text

[katharath]

Well Kenny, up thread I mentioned how great texting is, but after several years of it, I've finally just today had a rather large "oops I screwed up royally moment!"

My mother likes to text myself and my siblings in group texts, so that everyone can see everyone else's texts at once. She texted me today bc she's concerned about one of my brothers - his life is full of upheaval and things are not good. I replied to her texts, we were conversing back and forth, and in one of my texts I casually referred to my SIL (my other, youngest brother's wife) as "that bitch". In my defense, I have a terrible mouth and my mother and I were discussing emotionally charged things via text. Also my SIL is pretty difficult. (Ok, I can see that it's a weak defense).

Then my mother texts back "Your brother can see your text". And sure enough I look up to the top screen, and my mother has done another of her annoying blast texts and this one includes me and my youngest brother, whose wife I've just called a bitch. To his (virtual) face.

My reaction: oh F*#^!!!!!


(Backstory:
My youngest brother and I were very close until he married this woman, his second wife. I got along well with his first wife, but this one he met and married within just weeks of knowing her, very quickly after his divorce from first wife. For many reasons, she and I do not get along (nor does she get along well with most of our family). She basically hates me for what I feel are baseless reasons, and now, years later, even though he and I live two minutes apart, we almost never get to see each other, as she "runs" his life pretty tightly. It's very complicated, I have a side to the story and so does she - that alone would take forever to sort through but it's not necessary to this particular thing - and now I worry that my last tenuous connection with my brother is ruined. And it was definitely my fault. I'm so angry at myself!!!!)

Now you have an example of the dangers of texting.

Can't wait to see how this drama turns out...brother has not replied to any texts yet as I think he's possibly sleeping due to his work schedule. I quickly apologized in the same texting thread, but I can certainly see how he would hold it against me, it was thoughtless and rude, a big screw up on my part.

Sorry in advance if this is an unwelcome intrusion on your thread, Kenny. Honestly I'm upset about it, saw your thread, and thought maybe it was a timely reminder of the bad side of texting/plus it gave me a chance to vent. Just ignore if you want to!

 

[kenny]

Thanks Katharath.
No problem, I don't think your post was a threadjack at all.
(Actually, I don't mind threadjacks which is why I probably do it a lot.)

In fact I love learning about pitfalls to watch out for.
I had no idea group texting was even possible.

Hope things improve between you and your brother ... and the bitch.

This brings up a question.
Can we edit a text after sending it if the recipient hasn't opened it yet?

... and are you notified that/when the recipient has opened your text?

 

[katharath]

Well, thanks for letting me get that off my chest, Kenny

Not sure how it will go, my brother is all around a great guy in almost every way. I would hate to completely lose him from my life, especially over something so stupid on my part.

To try to answer your questions -

1) I'm not aware of any ability to edit texts once they're sent. If anyone knows how, please tell me right away, lol!!!

and

2) sometimes/yes. There are settings that can show that, but they have to be turned on by each individual user. I prefer to keep mine turned off, as it makes me feel pressure to quickly return texts if someone "knows" I've already read theirs.

(Edited for spelling/grammar correction).

 

[kenny]

I am an introvert and do hate long rambling phone conversations.
I get to the point and say Bye.

Why would introverts prefer texting to phone or email? (you may push me over the edge, here)

It is an ideal way of communicating if you're an introvert. It takes away the daunting element of speaking with people in an audio manner while not having the lag time betweem messages like an email does. It's a good compromise in that regard.

I don't understand the red part.
What's the different in time lag in email vs. text?

Are you referring to the technology itself or the usual way (etiquette) the different technologies are used?

For example, someone may see and respond to an email immediately or after a few days.
I assume the same for text.

No?

Is it assumed/agreed to that texts are to be paid attention to and responded to faster than email?

 

[kenny]

2) sometimes/yes. There are settings that can show that, but they have to be turned on by each individual user. I prefer to keep mine turned off, as it makes me feel pressure to quickly return texts if someone "knows" I've already read theirs.

Oh, so BOTH parties have settings to set regarding indications a text has been read?

 

[katharath]

2) sometimes/yes. There are settings that can show that, but they have to be turned on by each individual user. I prefer to keep mine turned off, as it makes me feel pressure to quickly return texts if someone "knows" I've already read theirs.

Oh, so BOTH parties have settings to set regarding indications a text has been read?

Yes. At least on Apple/iPhones, though I can't speak definitively to any other type of phone. I can turn mine on, that way others can tell if I've read their texts; I cannot tell if others have read the texts that *I* send, unless their setting is also set to ON.

I hope that makes sense! I believe I'm saying it correctly...I'm sure someone will point it out if I'm not.

 

[dk168]

I am 50, and text in long-hand. It takes time, however, that's what I prefer.

As for keeping friendship alive, both sides need to make an effort.

Friends come and go. Some friends are worth the effort to keep, some don't.

I have not kept in touch with some ex-colleagues as they insisted on communicating via Facebook, and I don't do FB.

DK

 

[dk168]

Just read more of the posts in this thread, here are more of my 2p.

I dislike using the phone as I can sound very abrupt over the phone.

I am far more diplomatic in writing.

As for e-mail vs. text, I would say I respond to text quicker than I respond to e-mail, as I do not always check for personal e-mails using my phone when I am at work; whereas the phone is always on to receive texts.

DK

 

[kenny]

I am 50, and text in long-hand. It takes time, however, that's what I prefer.

Long hand? You've lost me.

 

[kenny]

I have not kept in touch with some ex-colleagues as they insisted on communicating via Facebook, and I don't do FB.

DK

I have a very dear friend I have drifted away from since I won't join FB.

It would be easy to do a blame game here, but it just is what it is.

 

[dk168]

I am 50, and text in long-hand. It takes time, however, that's what I prefer.

Long hand? You've lost me.

Spelling every word in full, and not use short-hands, like "g8" = great (apparently Prince William or Harry taught the Queen that one".

DK

P.S. Emojis are completely lost on me!

 

[kenny]

I am 50, and text in long-hand. It takes time, however, that's what I prefer.

Long hand? You've lost me.

Spelling every word in full, and not use short-hands, like "g8" = great (apparently Prince William or Harry taught the Queen that one".

DK

P.S. Emojis are completely lost on me!

Oh fer cryin out loud!
I gotta learn a new friggin language too?

 

[jordyonbass]

I am an introvert and do hate long rambling phone conversations.
I get to the point and say Bye.

Why would introverts prefer texting to phone or email? (you may push me over the edge, here)

It is an ideal way of communicating if you're an introvert. It takes away the daunting element of speaking with people in an audio manner while not having the lag time betweem messages like an email does. It's a good compromise in that regard.

I don't understand the red part.
What's the different in time lag in email vs. text?

Are you referring to the technology itself or the usual way (etiquette) the different technologies are used?

For example, someone may see and respond to an email immediately or after a few days.
I assume the same for text.

No?

Is it assumed/agreed to that texts are to be paid attention to and responded to faster than email?

Generally text messages are responded to or seen a lot faster than an email, I guess the major difference is you're notified by an alert tone or vibration of an incoming message by a device in your pocket whereas email typically does not alert someone of a message, they have to manually check their inbox (some people have their phones setup so they are alerted like a text message but it's not that common).

It doesn't mean you HAVE to respond immediately, I've got mates that take days or a week to get back to me. But that's usually because they're too drunk to figure anything out

 

[katharath]

Just in case anyone was curious - I did hear back from my brother. He was extremely gracious about it and basically laughed it off. I was very apologetic and felt like such a fool, and I'm so grateful that he accepted my apology!! I will be as careful as I can not only to never make that particulat mistake again, but I'll also try to watch my mouth more in general...

I was very worried about this and it's a relief that he was so kind about it.

 

[kenny]

Just in case anyone was curious - I did hear back from my brother. He was extremely gracious about it and basically laughed it off. I was very apologetic and felt like such a fool, and I'm so grateful that he accepted my apology!! I will be as careful as I can not only to never make that particulat mistake again, but I'll also try to watch my mouth more in general...

I was very worried about this and it's a relief that he was so kind about it.

Good to hear but ... is his wife a beeach, or not?


Sorry, just had to.

 

[kenny]

I am an introvert and do hate long rambling phone conversations.
I get to the point and say Bye.

Why would introverts prefer texting to phone or email? (you may push me over the edge, here)

It is an ideal way of communicating if you're an introvert. It takes away the daunting element of speaking with people in an audio manner while not having the lag time betweem messages like an email does. It's a good compromise in that regard.

I don't understand the red part.
What's the different in time lag in email vs. text?

Are you referring to the technology itself or the usual way (etiquette) the different technologies are used?

For example, someone may see and respond to an email immediately or after a few days.
I assume the same for text.

No?

Is it assumed/agreed to that texts are to be paid attention to and responded to faster than email?

Generally text messages are responded to or seen a lot faster than an email, I guess the major difference is you're notified by an alert tone or vibration of an incoming message by a device in your pocket whereas email typically does not alert someone of a message, they have to manually check their inbox (some people have their phones setup so they are alerted like a text message but it's not that common).

It doesn't mean you HAVE to respond immediately, I've got mates that take days or a week to get back to me. But that's usually because they're too drunk to figure anything out

Well, when they get more booze give em my phone number.

 

[katharath]

Just in case anyone was curious - I did hear back from my brother. He was extremely gracious about it and basically laughed it off. I was very apologetic and felt like such a fool, and I'm so grateful that he accepted my apology!! I will be as careful as I can not only to never make that particulat mistake again, but I'll also try to watch my mouth more in general...

I was very worried about this and it's a relief that he was so kind about it.

Good to hear but ... is his wife a beeach, or not?


Sorry, just had to.

Lol...text me and I'll tell you

 

[arkieb1]

You should be able to get a cheap smartphone, people give them to their kids these days and kids buy them for themselves too...

I have a friend that is a University lecturer and he constantly complains that the students are on phones during lectures, these days there are signs and people requesting they turn them off but a lot of students dont

Does your partner or any family members or friends have an old one if they upgrade they don't want that is another cheap way of getting one.

If you have a tablet like an Ipad you can text to an Iphone and my husband has is Iphone set up that he can get texts from people's computers. Is there any way you can send him a message like a short email but he gets it in a format as a text from your computer instead, and if he texts you back it goes to you as an email therefore eliminating the need for you getting a smartphone, if you don't want one.

 

[kenny]

You should be able to get a cheap smartphone, people give them to their kids these days and kids buy them for themselves too...

I have a friend that is a University lecturer and he constantly complains that the students are on phones during lectures, these days there are signs and people requesting they turn them off but a lot of students dont

Does your partner or any family members or friends have an old one if they upgrade they don't want that is another cheap way of getting one.

If you have a tablet like an Ipad you can text to an Iphone and my husband has is Iphone set up that he can get texts from people's computers. Is there any way you can send him a message like a short email but he gets it in a format as a text from your computer instead, and if he texts you back it goes to you as an email therefore eliminating the need for you getting a smartphone, if you don't want one.

A hand me down is a great idea.
That would be perfect for me.
Thanks, I'll ask around.

 

[MJ_Mac]

Hey Kenny, does your Nokia have a little clown that waves bye-bye when you shut it off? I had one that did and I still miss it. I loved that phone - simple and basic. I just started texting after I got my first BlackBerry. I now have a BlackBerry Classic because I still can't bring myself to give up the keyboard. I use the BBM function on my phone more than texting.

 

[chrono]

I refuse to use shorthand and text-speak when texting. None of the "Meet you @ 8" or "Stuff 4 U in the fridge".

 

[missy]

I refuse to use shorthand and text-speak when texting. None of the "Meet you @ 8" or "Stuff 4 U in the fridge".

Haha me too. I hate misspelling words on purpose. I just cannot do it. Oh and I HATE autocorrect as when it doesn't recognize a word it makes it into something totally different than what I originally wrote. Drives me nuts. I know I can probably turn it off but haven't gotten around to figuring out how to do that.

 

[amc80]

Haha me too. I hate misspelling words on purpose. I just cannot do it. Oh and I HATE autocorrect as when it doesn't recognize a word it makes it into something totally different than what I originally wrote. Drives me nuts. I know I can probably turn it off but haven't gotten around to figuring out how to do that.

Same here. I've never once said "u" instead of "you," or any other text speak. Sort of proud of it haha.

 

[kenny]

I refuse to use shorthand and text-speak when texting. None of the "Meet you @ 8" or "Stuff 4 U in the fridge".

Rnt U wured kids wil think ur not kul?

(Did I spell that all 'correctly'?)

 

[chrono]

Rnt U wured kids wil think ur not kul?
(Did I spell that all 'correctly'?)

What on earth did you just type? I can't decipher a thing.

 

[kenny]

Rnt U wured kids wil think ur not kul?
(Did I spell that all 'correctly'?)

What on earth did you just type? I can't decipher a thing.

Chrono, you need to get younger.

 

[blackprophet]

Kenny,

Can I ask what company you are with? You can get a brand new smart phone for <$100 + the cost of a sim card (Going to assume your phone doesn't have a sim card), and you would not need to change your plan. You dont NEED a data plan with a smartphone (Despite what the companies will want you to believe), they work without one. If you don't want internet on your phone don't do it.

If you curious about how internet could work on your phone, you could connect it to wifi and see what it is like.

Here are some examples of good, cheap phones that you can buy outright, unlocked, <$100. That way the phone will have a warantee.
(These are the 2015 equivalents of your phone). I asked your company, because they may not work with the company you are with.

http://www.microsoftstore.com/store/msusa/en_US/pdp/BLU-Win-JR-LTE--Unlocked/productID.316940400

http://www.staples.com/BLU-Win-JR-W410u-Unlocked-GSM-Windows-8-1-Quad-Core-4G-HSPA-Phone-White/product_1530249

http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=9SIA7VW2X33521

You could probably find these as stores locally.

 

[kenny]

Kenny,

Can I ask what company you are with? You can get a brand new smart phone for <$100 + the cost of a sim card (Going to assume your phone doesn't have a sim card), and you would not need to change your plan. You dont NEED a data plan with a smartphone (Despite what the companies will want you to believe), they work without one. If you don't want internet on your phone don't do it.

If you curious about how internet could work on your phone, you could connect it to wifi and see what it is like.

Here are some examples of good, cheap phones that you can buy outright, unlocked, <$100. That way the phone will have a warantee.
(These are the 2015 equivalents of your phone). I asked your company, because they may not work with the company you are with.

http://www.microsoftstore.com/store/msusa/en_US/pdp/BLU-Win-JR-LTE--Unlocked/productID.316940400

http://www.staples.com/BLU-Win-JR-W410u-Unlocked-GSM-Windows-8-1-Quad-Core-4G-HSPA-Phone-White/product_1530249

http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=9SIA7VW2X33521

You could probably find these as stores locally.

Thank you.

But don't I have to buy an iPhone to get Siri?
Or, do all phones have that voice to text now?
And is Siri in the phone itself or is a connection to the Internet needed to use Siri, or similar voice to text thingies?

Anyone know?

I'd like to keep my prepaid plan (which is so cheap it is discontinued for new clients, but I'm grandfathered) but have a Siri-like feature.

 

[kenny]

Is it correct to say there are only two kinds of smartphones, iPhone and Androids?

IOW are all smartphones that are not iPhones called Androids?

 

[chrono]

I think Siri is exclusive to the iPhone (Apple). Android is the Samsung version.