brooke.lynne
Rough_Rock
- Joined
- Dec 7, 2007
- Messages
- 54
Hey ladies.
I bought myself a ring... and need some insight!
I am four years into my relationship and seven months into my constant obsession with getting engaged, and a more recent ring fascination.
I recently imposed a no-talking-about-it-with-him rule on myself. I think it''s easier to restrain myself from bringing it up than to listen to his hemming and hawwing about timing.
The flip side of that decision was analyzing why it was so important to me that we be engaged. I decided that I want to be engaged because I want to, and that is enough.
I knew I would love the feeling of wearing an engagement ring, and how it would make others look at me differently, especially at work, but I know he''s just not ready to go there yet. That being said, we have discussed getting married, at length, for years now, and have taken a series of steps to make us closer. We both acknowledge that our relationship is beyond the point of no return, and when I do bring it up, he always says that he believes we are going to be married.
So I was chatting up a local jeweler (I sometimes indulge in browsing, even if I don''t tell him) and happened upon an antique, 1920s era rose gold ring with a .10 or something diamond. It is not appropriate as an e-ring for our ages and place in life (I paid $100). So I bought it, on the spot. I''ve been wearing it on my left hand, and I okayed it with him. I also notified him that I would tell co-workers and friends that it was a gift from him (a lie). But I know that if people ask me if I''m engaged, I have to say no, mostly because my BF would think it was lying.
What makes a couple engaged? Agreeing to be married, right? The dropping to one knee, surprise thing is a cultural phenomenon that just doesn''t seem to be part of his style. If anyone asked me who was a stranger or a neighbor who I didn''t know well, I would just say I was engaged (I pretend to be his wife for doctor''s appointment purposes all the time anyway).
I feel like I''m crazy for buying myself what can ostensibly be considered an e-ring. Help me manage the crazy!
I bought myself a ring... and need some insight!
I am four years into my relationship and seven months into my constant obsession with getting engaged, and a more recent ring fascination.
I recently imposed a no-talking-about-it-with-him rule on myself. I think it''s easier to restrain myself from bringing it up than to listen to his hemming and hawwing about timing.
The flip side of that decision was analyzing why it was so important to me that we be engaged. I decided that I want to be engaged because I want to, and that is enough.
I knew I would love the feeling of wearing an engagement ring, and how it would make others look at me differently, especially at work, but I know he''s just not ready to go there yet. That being said, we have discussed getting married, at length, for years now, and have taken a series of steps to make us closer. We both acknowledge that our relationship is beyond the point of no return, and when I do bring it up, he always says that he believes we are going to be married.
So I was chatting up a local jeweler (I sometimes indulge in browsing, even if I don''t tell him) and happened upon an antique, 1920s era rose gold ring with a .10 or something diamond. It is not appropriate as an e-ring for our ages and place in life (I paid $100). So I bought it, on the spot. I''ve been wearing it on my left hand, and I okayed it with him. I also notified him that I would tell co-workers and friends that it was a gift from him (a lie). But I know that if people ask me if I''m engaged, I have to say no, mostly because my BF would think it was lying.
What makes a couple engaged? Agreeing to be married, right? The dropping to one knee, surprise thing is a cultural phenomenon that just doesn''t seem to be part of his style. If anyone asked me who was a stranger or a neighbor who I didn''t know well, I would just say I was engaged (I pretend to be his wife for doctor''s appointment purposes all the time anyway).
I feel like I''m crazy for buying myself what can ostensibly be considered an e-ring. Help me manage the crazy!