How to respond

[mrs-b]

The repercussions of wearing a large diamond ring at work can be more serious than hurt feelings from “woke” coworkers’ comments:

No One Wants Your Comments About Their Engagement Ring

As I walked into the elevator that would take me up to the fifth floor for an ~important~ afternoon meeting […]

thefinancialdiet.com

What a stupid 'article'. This woman, as someone publishing anything at all, has bigger problems than her diamond ring if she keeps ending articles with a dangling preposition. Then again, these sorts of rubbishy 'subscriber-written' articles are everywhere online, so I guess we can all have a voice.

People in general have pretty bad taste and a fair lack of attention to detail. A ring with a 9mm diameter instead of a 6mm diameter is the least of anyone's worries. The lady at my pharmacy who works the cash register has the lowest qualty 2ct marquise diamond ring you could ever imagine - but I don't think it's *that* that's hampering her career.

Just remember, people will comment on anything because they're bored. But at the end of the day, all of us are really only interested in our own lives. And the day I start changing my jewelry selection because of the small mindedness of another person (and I do mean the comment broadly) is the day I'm no longer my mother's daughter. She raised me to have a stronger backbone and a more clearly defined sense of self that *that*.

Gees louise....

 

[msop04]

Imaginary audience much? Sounds like someone hasn't moved beyond that stage of adolescence where it's normal to imagine that everyone is looking at you and thinking about you (because...narcissism). It also sounds like her feelings about her ring are more about what SHE thinks about her ring than what anyone else has said. Probably because she works for some kind of publication that espouses Financial Independence and Retire Early philosophies.

The truth is that people will make judgements about other people for all sorts of reasons. Height, weight, ethnicity, the style of clothing you wear (and the perceived price), your hairstyle, your makeup, how you hold yourself, how you shake hands, how you speak. You can try to control that if this is important to you personally or professionally (and many of us do - by wearing work appropriate clothing and accessories that are well suited to the culture that we work in, by matching our hair and makeup choices to the culture in which we work, and by presenting ourselves well when we know that it is going to count). But you get to a certain stage in life (established at work, established personally), and you really do stop caring whether someone things your ring is too big. Honestly, many, many professional women sport rather impressive rings - and it means absolutely nothing about whether or not they want to work and be promoted in their particular fields. And many have bought those rings for themselves. Along with all of their other jewelry.

This... x1000.

 

[Jacquiemalta]

What is an good response when people make a snarky comment about diamonds not being rare, it being a marketing ploy, etc? I just bought a new diamond, and I'm sure these comments will come from certain individuals I can't avoid (work). To clarify, I don't really care what they think about how I spend my money, it just would be nice to have a valid rebuttal to their "woke" comments. Thanks

I'd roll my eyes and say, "Oh that old chestnut. You must have been reading (name of the least respected newspaper/website in your area)." Then walk away or change the subject. Those comments are literally all some people know about diamonds because articles spouting about it go through regular phases of trending.

 

[PreRaphaelite]

It is sometimes expedient to say, “Oh this? It was a gift.”
I’m not sure why that ends the convo, but it does work.

 

[Rose-gold-or-bust]

When people make comments like that, it is more a comment on themselves then on you. They are likely jealous and are trying to make themselves feel better about their own diamond or lack thereof.

if somebody said that to me I’d probably say something like “well, clothing isn’t rare either but I still like to wear it” or “I don’t wear them because they are rare, I wear them because they are pretty”

 

[Mrs_Strizzle]

Update-

The coworker in question yesterday noticed my ring while in my office but didn't comment, which was a bit out of character. Later I heard from another coworker that she said if I wanted people to believe it was "real" I should have gotten a smaller one.

 

[JPie]

Update-

The coworker in question yesterday noticed my ring while in my office but didn't comment, which was a bit out of character. Later I heard from another coworker that she said if I wanted people to believe it was "real" I should have gotten a smaller one.

The funny thing about people like your coworker is how they never understand that they've only managed to make themselves look bad.

 

[msop04]

Update-

The coworker in question yesterday noticed my ring while in my office but didn't comment, which was a bit out of character. Later I heard from another coworker that she said if I wanted people to believe it was "real" I should have gotten a smaller one.

This comment confirms it's a case of the green-eyed monster. Ignore her... she's a miserable person.

 

[Mrs_Strizzle]

Agreed, @JPie . My friend and I had a good chuckle because she knows I'm perfectly content with anyone thinking it's fake and will not be correcting her.

 

[cmd2014]

One day she will probably look back and cringe at who she was today. Mean spirited stuff like that really stems from insecurity. Your ring is beautiful and the only person it needs to make happy is you. Wear it in good health!

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Update-

The coworker in question yesterday noticed my ring while in my office but didn't comment, which was a bit out of character. Later I heard from another coworker that she said if I wanted people to believe it was "real" I should have gotten a smaller one.

what a silly cow she is
...your other co-worker probably shouldn't have told you either but possobly likes to stir the pot
a comment like that is just jealously in my opinion
i don't beleave for one second its about people beleaving it's real
its about you enjoying some sparkle on your finger
bair that stupid girl no mind

 

[Jacquiemalta]

I've had people say that. I reply with "Oh that old chestnut; it seems everyone is reading the same overused article in the Daily Mail these days" (the Daily Mail is considered a trashy newspaper in the UK now). Bit snarky but so what? Their comments were snarky first, poorly disguised as "concern"

 

[winnietucker]

Yikes! How are you feeling about the size though now that it’s on hand? IIRC we had similar concerns...