How nosey are people about your diamond?

[jo_c]

Date: 12/12/2007 11:32:39 AM
Author: ChargerGrrl
I once got a ''oh-no-you-really-didn''t-just-ask-that'' question from an accquaintance.

He asked about the carat size of my ering, and what the cut was (clueless guy). I responded that it was a 1.4 carat princess. He then asked about color & clarity- I told him it was a G/SI. He thought about it awhile (saw the wheels turning in his head), and finally said ''wow, M certainly didn''t spend 2 months salary on your ring! How''d he get away with spending less?''

Talk about waaaaay out of line!

I know I shouldn''t let that little exchange get to me, but now I''m rather vague when a random person asks about my e-ring.

""Well, friend. It must be that he is so rockin in the sack...

, but if I were you, I''d spend a LOT on any ring YOU buy

""

What a turkey!

-Jo

 

[Rhea]

My ring is smaller (under 1/2 carat - so really really small in the PS world) and in over 3 years I''ve only gotten 2 comments on it - just that it''s pretty.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Date: 12/12/2007 11:32:39 AM
Author: ChargerGrrl
I once got a ''oh-no-you-really-didn''t-just-ask-that'' question from an accquaintance.

He asked about the carat size of my ering, and what the cut was (clueless guy). I responded that it was a 1.4 carat princess. He then asked about color & clarity- I told him it was a G/SI. He thought about it awhile (saw the wheels turning in his head), and finally said ''wow, M certainly didn''t spend 2 months salary on your ring! How''d he get away with spending less?''

Talk about waaaaay out of line!

I know I shouldn''t let that little exchange get to me, but now I''m rather vague when a random person asks about my e-ring.

ChargerGrrl, I''ve heard this on a few occasions (from DH''s former boss, from DH''s mom, from a couple of freinds, jokingly). My reply is "No, he absolutely did not spend 2 months salary, I would have been P*SSED!"

 

[ChargerGrrl]

Date: 12/12/2007 3:49:09 PM
Author: NewEnglandLady

Date: 12/12/2007 11:32:39 AM
Author: ChargerGrrl
I once got a ''oh-no-you-really-didn''t-just-ask-that'' question from an accquaintance.

He asked about the carat size of my ering, and what the cut was (clueless guy). I responded that it was a 1.4 carat princess. He then asked about color & clarity- I told him it was a G/SI. He thought about it awhile (saw the wheels turning in his head), and finally said ''wow, M certainly didn''t spend 2 months salary on your ring! How''d he get away with spending less?''

Talk about waaaaay out of line!

I know I shouldn''t let that little exchange get to me, but now I''m rather vague when a random person asks about my e-ring.

ChargerGrrl, I''ve heard this on a few occasions (from DH''s former boss, from DH''s mom, from a couple of freinds, jokingly). My reply is ''No, he absolutely did not spend 2 months salary, I would have been P*SSED!''

oh my, i''m dying over here!! i''m laughing so hard that my co-workers think i''m nuts.

GREAT comeback, NEL! i''m filing that one away...

 

[february2003bride]

I''m glad you posted this Gypsy. I was going to post a question for those who have lower color and clarity and how they respond when asked the specs on their diamond. I have my J, SI2 arriving this week and the only person I''m worried about telling is my closest friend. She snubs anything lower than a F/G and I know she''s going to ask as soon as she sees it.

 

[marcy]

My setting is pretty subtle but I get comments on my diamond a lot. People in jewelry stores always comment on the nice diamond. People in general will just comment on how much it sparkles or how clear it is. Of course there is always the poor unspecting person who wants to touch it to make sure I know what they are talking about. Little do they know I might smack their hand if they do actually touch it.

 

[kellyfish]

Feb2003--I''ll bet you $50 that if you told her your stone''s color is higher she would never know the difference................

 

[jfo]

Date: 12/12/2007 10:54:56 PM
Author: kellyfish
Feb2003--I''ll bet you $50 that if you told her your stone''s color is higher she would never know the difference................

DITTO!

 

[Madam Bijoux]

I mostly get compliments on how sparkly everything is. The really amusing comments have come from employees in jewelry stores who say that they've never heard of a Royal Asscher. People usually ask me how long I've been married, and it floors them when I tell then I'm a collector and have never been married.

 

[Gypsy]

I''m glad I started the thread too! And I''ll take a part of that bet. She won''t know the difference at all. Tell her to guess. I''m guessing she says at least G VS2. If she does... just NOD!

Date: 12/13/2007 10:13:20 AM
Author: Madam Bijoux
I mostly get compliments on how sparkly everything is. The really amusing comments have come from employees in jewelry stores who say that they''ve never heard of a Royal Asscher. People usually ask me how long I''ve been married, and it floors them when I tell then I''m a collector and have never been married.

Ahh well, it''s the brainwashing about diamonds meaning love. Ridiculous. But it doesn''t surprise me at all.

As for the RA ignorance... no surprise there either truth to tell, I bet they think your ring is lovely though when they see it. I love RA''s.

I had a woman at a jewelry store last year TELL ME that I was lied to and the my stone was a princess, and since SHE sold jewelry she KNEW a princess when she saw one. *snort*

 

[february2003bride]

Date: 12/12/2007 11:03:41 PM
Author: jfo

Date: 12/12/2007 10:54:56 PM
Author: kellyfish
Feb2003--I''ll bet you $50 that if you told her your stone''s color is higher she would never know the difference................

DITTO!

JFo, Kelly and Gypsy- No, I know. I thought about having her guess after she does, I''ll know she''ll ask if she''s right. I don''t know. There''s more to it then that, it''s complicated and I don''t want to highjack this thread

. I''m sure I''ll tell her the truth because 1) why lie? and 2) it''s not HER ring, it''s mine. But I''m still feeling put off when the time comes. Thanks!

 

[Odilia]

Date: 12/11/2007 1:52:51 PM
Author:Gypsy
Have you all experienced ESPECIALLY nosey inquiries on your diamond''s specs (outside of PS GTGs and jewelry stores)?

Almost none, whatsoever.

 

[BriBee]

Date: 12/12/2007 9:17:45 PM
Author: february2003bride

I''m glad you posted this Gypsy. I was going to post a question for those who have lower color and clarity and how they respond when asked the specs on their diamond. I have my J, SI2 arriving this week and the only person I''m worried about telling is my closest friend. She snubs anything lower than a F/G and I know she''s going to ask as soon as she sees it.

Sorry for the mini-hijack, but I was nervous to tell my best friend about my ring being an SI2, because she wanted nothing lower than VS2 for her ring. Isn''t funny how we feel "worried" or "nervous" about this?

Anyway, I just told her the truth.

 

[solange]

I have never had anyone ask me about the specs on my ring and I would never ask anyone that question.

I have had the usual comments--pretty ring--but no one ever asked anything about where I bought it or anything else of a personal nature. I did have two people guess at the size--"It"s huge. It must be at least two carats." And friend one told people I knew that it was 6 1/2 carats. Other than size, I have had no one inquire about anything else.

 

[louisvgirl]

Being new at this engagement....I''ll chime in.......

I had someone I know (more than acquaintance, but not a friend freind) say to me...........look at that thing...........can you cut glass with that?.........no, really

have you tried cutting glass?

What does that mean?

Your ring rocks!!!

or Is your ring a rock?

I laughed it off and changed the subject. I didn''t know what to say.........duh......

 

[Circe]

It''s funny how out of all the comments I''ve gotten on the ring - which have generally been along the lines of "Hey! Pretty! Congrats!" - it''s the pointed ones that stick out ... I''ve only had two or three people go into more depth, but those three have been intense!

The first and most out-there happened when we visited my partner''s family out in Sweden: engagement traditions and expectations are completely different there, and apparently all of his friends started calling him "Carat-and-a-Half" guy to tease him right after we got engaged (typically, both partners exchange plain bands for the engagement, and the bling comes on the wedding day, consisting of a .10 to .50 stone). So there was a lot of "Wow, are you comfortable wearing that?!?", but it was all fairly good natured, except for one of his sister''s friends who was recently married herself ... she pretty much grilled me about color and clarity and size. I didn''t particularly mind the curiousity - any excuse to talk about my pet obsession, right? - but it felt very awkward because she mentioned that she''d wanted to get a bigger stone, but it wasn''t typical for Sweden, and thus, they''d gone for "the best" quality-wise, etc., etc. I ended up feeling like I was fighting on two fronts of defensiveness ... one, feeling ostentatious because of the size (though, for NY, I think my ring isn''t unusual), and hoping she wasn''t feeling defensive about the size of her stone, and two, falling prey to the "quality" idea, even though I love my J and chose it *because* and not in spite of the color. Oy! Talk about a mixed bag. It definitely taught me to stay vague on the details to avoid awkwardness ....

 

[Lill_The_Thrill]

Date: 12/13/2007 7:19:10 PM
Author: Circe
It's funny how out of all the comments I've gotten on the ring - which have generally been along the lines of 'Hey! Pretty! Congrats!' - it's the pointed ones that stick out ... I've only had two or three people go into more depth, but those three have been intense!

The first and most out-there happened when we visited my partner's family out in Sweden: engagement traditions and expectations are completely different there, and apparently all of his friends started calling him 'Carat-and-a-Half' guy to tease him right after we got engaged (typically, both partners exchange plain bands for the engagement, and the bling comes on the wedding day, consisting of a .10 to .50 stone). So there was a lot of 'Wow, are you comfortable wearing that?!?', but it was all fairly good natured, except for one of his sister's friends who was recently married herself ... she pretty much grilled me about color and clarity and size. I didn't particularly mind the curiousity - any excuse to talk about my pet obsession, right? - but it felt very awkward because she mentioned that she'd wanted to get a bigger stone, but it wasn't typical for Sweden, and thus, they'd gone for 'the best' quality-wise, etc., etc. I ended up feeling like I was fighting on two fronts of defensiveness ... one, feeling ostentatious because of the size (though, for NY, I think my ring isn't unusual), and hoping she wasn't feeling defensive about the size of her stone, and two, falling prey to the 'quality' idea, even though I love my J and chose it *because* and not in spite of the color. Oy! Talk about a mixed bag. It definitely taught me to stay vague on the details to avoid awkwardness ....

Circe,
I'm from Sweden, I agree with what You have experienced, big diamonds are pretty uncommon here. A .5 ct solitaire is considered to be HUGE and almost gawdy. Ihave a friend who has a 1 carat solitaire (maybe a little smaller) and she gets comments like "I wouldn't feel comfortable wearing a smaller fortune on my finger". That's a very common comment, or "that's a pretty ring, but I don't understand how someone can waste so much money on an expensive diamond, it's the love that counts, not the ring". (ARGH!)

You're very much right, Swedes usually exchange plain yellow gold bands for engagement, and add a VERY subtle 5-stone (maybe .5 tcw) or a .25 ct solitaire as a wedding ring. I'm not really that close to getting engaged, but I've done some looking around, and I want a 1.5 ct solitaire, (Lol) I'mnot really sure how I'm gonna get away with it being in Sweden and all, I'm dreading the looks and the comments that I probably will receive wearing that ring, since my .25 ct already gets comments. This has made me consider getting an eternity band instead. It's bizarre, I know.

We have a social pressure not to stick out from the general crowd, and if you do, people are gonna make sure they tell you this. it's a known Swedish syndrome called "jantelagen". I don't think that was the case with You, but that's the case for many women who decide to get bigger diamonds, it's always questioned, how they can waste so much money on apiece of jewelry, they get comments like "You can buy a smaller country with that much money" (how rude!), (I'm a member of a Swedish wedding Forum, and have seen this happen almost everytime a woman says shes getting something that's considered big, ESPECIALLY when the diamond is I+/SI, then she gets critisized for the quality).

Sorry for the hijack...

 

[codex57]

They just ask to see my wife''s ring. Mention that it''s pretty or big, but don''t ask stats. One jeweler asked the stats. Otherwise, guy friends have asked on occassion, but that''s cuz they''re thinking of proposing and wanna get an idea.

 

[DiamanteBlu]

Date: 12/11/2007 10:19:58 PM
Author: tberube
I once had a coworker tell me under no uncertain terms that my EC was a radiant. But then again she had a beautiful 2ct. asscher that she called a cushion. I swear some people don't deserve their gorgeous jewelry.

OMG, I was just catching up on this thread and when I got to the asscher being called a cushion part I couldn't contain myself [my mouthful of wine, actually]! I am ROTFL and have wine all over my keyboard!!! Too funny!

 

[DiamanteBlu]

Date: 12/12/2007 9:17:45 PM
Author: february2003bride


I'm glad you posted this Gypsy. I was going to post a question for those who have lower color and clarity and how they respond when asked the specs on their diamond. I have my J, SI2 arriving this week and the only person I'm worried about telling is my closest friend. She snubs anything lower than a F/G and I know she's going to ask as soon as she sees it.

Yank her chain. Tell her it's a G and then see if she can tell the difference! LOL!
[Sorry - I'm a bit punchy tonight.]

ETA: I guess we concur. I didn't finish reading before I posted! Oops!

 

[DiamanteBlu]

Date: 12/13/2007 10:13:20 AM
Author: Madam Bijoux
I mostly get compliments on how sparkly everything is. The really amusing comments have come from employees in jewelry stores who say that they've never heard of a Royal Asscher. People usually ask me how long I've been married, and it floors them when I tell then I'm a collector and have never been married.

LOL! I bought myself my EC when I was unmarried. People still look at me sideways when they ask if it was a gift from my husband and I tell them "no".

I get a kick out of it - they look so confused!

 

[jewelerman]

DiamanteBlu,
I actually can relate to your comment about people reacting confused to who bought your ring for you...I am single and wear my 2.54 round brilliant in a ring on my right hand.When people ask if the diamond is for a future wife i tell them that it will always be on my hand and that I will buy another diamond for her when and if i decide to marry someday.Some people just assume that the only reason i have the diamond is to put it in an engagement ring and look confused when i say otherwise.

 

[Haven]

I''ve gotten a lot of comments along the lines of "WHOA! You''re ring is so sparkly!" and they''re usually followed with "did you just have it cleaned?" if it''s a married or engaged woman doing the asking. Strangers usually just comment about the bling factor, and then they don''t ask anything else. I love these comments, though, because then I get to show them my beautiful ring!

I have had a bunch of surprisingly nosey comments:

- A coworker ran up to me, slammed her left hand against mine and yelled "Hey! Your ring is bigger than mine! How big is it, 1.5 carats?" (It''s a 2 ct cushion. Meh.)

- A peer in grad school exclaimed that my FI "must do really well--that thing must have cost a fortune!"

- Another coworker said "Wow, it''s bigger than Mrs. OtherTeacherWhoJustGotEngaged and her fiance makes bank! Your fiance certainly can''t be a teacher--what does he do? Is he a doctor?"

 

[sera]

I''ve had my ring (.99 F SI2-eyeclean Princess of Hearts) less than a month; I haven''t heard anything rude (yet

) only a couple slightly defensive comments- most have been very positive.

One of my FI''s roomates actually saw it before I did when my FI was putting it into the ring box and I could hear her saying, "It''s so pretty! It''s so pretty!" When I told her it was a Princess of Hearts she said, "Oh, yeah." (Read: I know what a princess cut is). I tried explaining it was not a princess cut as the faceting is completely different, more like a round than a princess. I got the typical glazed over look. From now on I think I will just call it a cut-cornered square brilliant or square Hearts and Arrows rather than attempt to explain. The average person just doesn''t get faceting... they know if something sparkles and sometimes they can see it looks different somehow... but trying to explain, meh.

I got the "wow it''s so sparkly" comments. I''ve gotten, "I like that it''s square." I think only 1 asked the size and I told her. Another told me her size and I told her mine. I don''t mind being asked the size because I figure most are just curious (as sometimes I''m curious about others'').

A friend was joking, "WOW. What a rock! Is it real?" Certainly a .99 is not a rock in PSland, but where I was at the time, it was. He was joking and didn''t intend to make me feel uncomfortable, but he did.

comment: "Mine isn''t flawless."
my response: "Mine isn''t flawless either, but it''s eyeclean."
(out of context that sounds like I was slamming hers for not being eyeclean but the context was that neither of us could see the flaws in our diamonds- we had both wanted eyeclean but didn''t go for the expense of IF."

comment: "A .99?! A good one carat will cost like $10,000!"
my response: "Well, my FI got a good deal buying online and wiring the money."
(note: she wasn''t inferring mine was not "good," she was surprised I got a 1ct that was good since most 1cts ppl have aren''t so good)

I felt bad and kinda embarrassed when after commenting on how sparkly mine was, an acquaintance said, "Mine sparkles a lot after I clean it."

 

[Linda W]

Well, no one makes comments about my ring. .90 marquise. I have worn it for almost 27 years. At first I received comments, but no more. The color of the stone is J. I recently found out. No "poo" color as Traveling Girl calls it, ha ha ha. Now, when I wear my Padparadscha on my left hand, that is another story. People go nuts!!

Linda

 

[lumpkin]

People around here don''t ask. I''ve never had any family/friends/acquaintances say anything except compliments on it. When I''ve taken it in to the jewelers to be sized/rhodiumed, etc., then they ask, but it''s just to put on the order.

When I had a bigger diamond I had a couple of gawkers, one person said, "Must be nice!" but no one ever asked about specs, size or cost. EVER.

If anyone ever asked my response would depend on who they were and why I thought they were asking. I might say, "Why, are you looking to buy a diamond?" or fib and say "I don''t know, it was a gift from my husband."

 

[zoebartlett]

I''m late joining this but I had fun catching up with everyone''s responses. My ering is a three stone ring (.92 RB with .20 sides in a trellis setting) and other than people saying that they think it''s pretty, I haven''t gotten a ton of comments. The one I do hear a lot though is how sparkly it is. That makes me happy. I was visiting a friend the other night and her husband hadn''t seen my ring yet. He asked me if the center stone was a carat. No one''s asked me that before, let alone a guy. I chuckled a bit.

Hmm, on second thought, I have had people ask what the side stones are. Okay, I know they''re small but still...have people in the real worls not seen pear shaped diamonds before? Yeah, I wish they were a tad bigger.

No one''s ever asked me about the clarity, etc., but if I offer that information, their eyes glaze over a little. These are clearly not PSers.