Have you ever looked at listings for vintage jewelry and wondered what will happen to your...

[stonewell]

Everything will be passed onto my kids. I have only one daughter... and she has already said she’s going to have an amazing collection one day. My son will get first pick of whatever he would like for his future DW.

 

[partgypsy]

I do think about that. It makes me think, for me to spend the jewelry money on what pleases "me", because there is no guarantee that others will like the same things I do. And perhaps not to get any one item or piece that is really expensive, because it seems like it would be more likely to be sold for the money than kept as a memento. There was a period in my life, I thought it would be neat to have my kids inherit some rare stones that might be even more rare in the future. But I'm pretty much over that.

 

[wordie89]

Icy Jade, what a thought provoking post. Same thing as I go thrifting. I think, ah, the china, waterford and silver that hogs up my pantry and I rarely use will probably be here since neither of my children shows interest in that stuff same for old clothing, suits, shoes, tchotckes. On the other hand, when someone finds it and buys it, they're so pleased to have a beautiful widget at a good price. So, the gift of beauty and utility continues.
Mrs B, you may want to do something else with your rings before you and DH are cremated; i think the funeral contracts include their claim on recovery of things like metal valves, plates, pins and tooth fillings (yup, I have two gold ones).
Doberman I think I will try and give some of my jewelry to nieces if they want it so I can see their enjoyment.
Lisa RN I'm sending puppy dog kisses your way because my wheatie does that for me when I'm sad and it makes me feel so much better.

 

[MelMc]

I hope whomever gets my stuff only keeps it if they want to wear and enjoy it and not out of obligation. I have a ring that came down through my family unworn for 100 years because it was too sentimental to wear until it came to me. It was a graduation gift for a great-aunt who died before graduation. Her parents put away "Delia's ring" unworn until they were gone. My grandmother inherited it but couldn't wear it of the tragedy of her sister's short life. My mother was too scared of damaging this too precious family relic to wear it because of her mother and grandmother's combined reverence. I wear it regularly but I think it is sad that no one who knew my great-aunt ever took it out of the drawer and enjoyed it for her.

 

[Ally T]

@MelMc This is a really sad story. But I'm really REALLY glad you are rocking that baby on your Great Aunt's behalf. Good for you - she would be pleased to see it enjoying itself instead of lingering in a dark box. Can we see a picture?

 

[Madam Bijoux]

I hope that whoever gets mine will love them as much as I did and take good care of them and keep them clean.

 

[LemonMoonLex]

I actually think of this subject fairly often. I'm 25 and have coveted my mother's beautiful collection of gold and platinum jewelry since I was around 12 years old.
I remember each piece and memories of her wearing them. I'm very sentimental though just like my mother and my daughter is as well. She's almost 4 years old and started to pick up an interest in jewelry a year ago when she saw me playing with my Jewelry box. She has her own tiny collection of sterling silver rings.
I plan to have more children and hope to have more girls as well, and will write down which pieces they enjoy the most and those will be given to them when I pass.
Sadly in this life, time isn't guaranteed; we can all leave this Earth tomorrow.
I don't worry too much about my collection, I suppose I would if I never enjoyed or wore my rings out, but sentimentality runs in the family, especially with us women.

I also get a feeling of ease when I imagine my pieces being enjoyed by strangers if somewhere down the line my lineage decides to sell my collection.

Also Im not trying to hijack this thread but I have a question for you ladies, should the daughter have priority over the daughter in-law when it comes to the mother's jewelry? Let's say the daughter is very into jewelry, should she be able to keep what she wants or is it rude not to consider the daughter in-law even though she has her own mother? I've always wondered about this and what would be the right thing to do to please everyone.

It's very interesting to read everyone's replies (:

 

[Golden_bird]

Wow ! What a question! I started to rethink all my jewelry lol I have two small daughters,so if they will love the jewelry same as I do ,it’s def will go to them . But another thought started to bug me , if they sell it without a thought maybe that’s true to just keep the most memorable pieces and sell the rest and share a memory like vocation? Some unbelievable experience together that they will hold in their memory longer than a diamond ?well ,lots of food for thoughts ...

 

[Austina]

in answer to your question @TheGarnetGirl if I had a daughter and DIL I would give first dibs to my daughter, then give DIL other things of equal value.

 

[Gussie]

I actually think of this subject fairly often. I'm 25 and have coveted my mother's beautiful collection of gold and platinum jewelry since I was around 12 years old.
I remember each piece and memories of her wearing them. I'm very sentimental though just like my mother and my daughter is as well. She's almost 4 years old and started to pick up an interest in jewelry a year ago when she saw me playing with my Jewelry box. She has her own tiny collection of sterling silver rings.
I plan to have more children and hope to have more girls as well, and will write down which pieces they enjoy the most and those will be given to them when I pass.
Sadly in this life, time isn't guaranteed; we can all leave this Earth tomorrow.
I don't worry too much about my collection, I suppose I would if I never enjoyed or wore my rings out, but sentimentality runs in the family, especially with us women.

I also get a feeling of ease when I imagine my pieces being enjoyed by strangers if somewhere down the line my lineage decides to sell my collection.

Also Im not trying to hijack this thread but I have a question for you ladies, should the daughter have priority over the daughter in-law when it comes to the mother's jewelry? Let's say the daughter is very into jewelry, should she be able to keep what she wants or is it rude not to consider the daughter in-law even though she has her own mother? I've always wondered about this and what would be the right thing to do to please everyone.

It's very interesting to read everyone's replies (:

I want my girls and any future granddaughters to have most of the jewelry. Maybe a special piece for a future DIL, but the bulk and best is reserved for my girls. I know, I know... I am awful, lol!

 

[JPie]

I want my girls and any future granddaughters to have most of the jewelry. Maybe a special piece for a future DIL, but the bulk and best is reserved for my girls. I know, I know... I am awful, lol!

That just makes you a good mama bear.

I don’t expect my MIL to give me any jewelry. My SIL should get dibs.

 

[MelMc]

@MelMc This is a really sad story. But I'm really REALLY glad you are rocking that baby on your Great Aunt's behalf. Good for you - she would be pleased to see it enjoying itself instead of lingering in a dark box. Can we see a picture?

Here she is Alex T. The light isn't cooperating today and she is really looking washed out in the picture. The stone is a really glowy hot pink tourmaline.

 

[icy_jade]

Icy Jade, what a thought provoking post. Same thing as I go thrifting. I think, ah, the china, waterford and silver that hogs up my pantry and I rarely use will probably be here since neither of my children shows interest in that stuff same for old clothing, suits, shoes, tchotckes. On the other hand, when someone finds it and buys it, they're so pleased to have a beautiful widget at a good price. So, the gift of beauty and utility continues.
Mrs B, you may want to do something else with your rings before you and DH are cremated; i think the funeral contracts include their claim on recovery of things like metal valves, plates, pins and tooth fillings (yup, I have two gold ones).
Doberman I think I will try and give some of my jewelry to nieces if they want it so I can see their enjoyment.
Lisa RN I'm sending puppy dog kisses your way because my wheatie does that for me when I'm sad and it makes me feel so much better.

Right now I’m thinking that rather than my kids not appreciating my stuff and possibly selling them for a pittance, better that I liquidate and give my stuff to a good home? But then who knows what will happen right? Accidents do happen and we can’t predict the future. But I hate the thought of burdening my family with my old stuff you know?

Anyway my daughter is only 2.5 yo and she does notice what I wear so I have some hope that she will like my stuff... but after her, who knows.

On the topic of DIL vs daughter, for sure I’ll let my daughter have first dibs. And much will depend on DIL... who knows right? I may really like her. Mother of my grandkids etc...

@mrs-b
On second thoughts it’s a sweet gesture but it will be a shame to destroy your beautiful ring. Personally I prefer to have someone (even a stranger) enjoy my beauties when I’m gone.

 

[icy_jade]

I hope that whoever gets mine will love them as much as I did and take good care of them and keep them clean.

Yes! Exactly. I’ll be sad if they are locked away and not enjoyed...

Here she is Alex T. The light isn't cooperating today and she is really looking washed out in the picture. The stone is a really glowy hot pink tourmaline.

And so I think it’s great that this pretty ring is getting the love and attention it deserves.

 

[LemonMoonLex]

@MelMc
-That is a beautiful pink tourmaline ring and should be worn and adored. (:
Lovely!

 

[whitewave]

My kids are getting it whether they like it or not. I hope my pieces get passed down, but I suppose once I am gone, it is theirs to keep, wear, give away or sell.

 

[Calliecake]

@ceg , I think the way you are thinking is perfectly normal. If I had daughters I would want them to have first dips on what they wanted. My MIL had no daughters and left no instructions for her jewelry. I felt her grandaughters should be given first choice. I have a ring and a bracelet of hers. Her Granddaughters weren’t thrilled with these pieces (the girls were only 9 and 11). If they want the pieces I will gladly give them to them. They are now 18 and 14 and still have no interest in them.

I know one of my nieces would sell my diamonds for football or hockey tickets. LOL Everybody has their hobbies they love. Just look at all of us here!

 

[mrs-b]

Mrs B, you may want to do something else with your rings before you and DH are cremated; i think the funeral contracts include their claim on recovery of things like metal valves, plates, pins and tooth fillings (yup, I have two gold ones).

There's no sense in putting rings through a crematorium process, so no, I didn't mean that. They would be plopped into our urns with our ashes. And then they'll sit interminably on someone's mantelpiece.

 

[mrs-b]

[QUOTE="icy_jade, post: 4373694, member: 38471
@mrs-b
On second thoughts it’s a sweet gesture but it will be a shame to destroy your beautiful ring. Personally I prefer to have someone (even a stranger) enjoy my beauties when I’m gone.[/QUOTE]

Which ring do you mean, @icy_jade? The ones I don't want will be sold - either before or after I die - and my wedding ring will go to my husband. I don't think I mentioned destroying anything.

 

[icy_jade]

There's no sense in putting rings through a crematorium process, so no, I didn't mean that. They would be plopped into our urns with our ashes. And then they'll sit interminably on someone's mantelpiece.

Ah ok I was under the impression you will cremate some of your rings.

 

[redwood66]

I have sons who don't give a hoot about jewelry. I do hope they will allow me to help them with their future wives though. If I end up with granddaughters then maybe my stuff will go to them. Otherwise I can't worry about it now and just enjoy it while I can.

 

[LLJsmom]

I actually think of this subject fairly often. I'm 25 and have coveted my mother's beautiful collection of gold and platinum jewelry since I was around 12 years old.
I remember each piece and memories of her wearing them. I'm very sentimental though just like my mother and my daughter is as well. She's almost 4 years old and started to pick up an interest in jewelry a year ago when she saw me playing with my Jewelry box. She has her own tiny collection of sterling silver rings.
I plan to have more children and hope to have more girls as well, and will write down which pieces they enjoy the most and those will be given to them when I pass.
Sadly in this life, time isn't guaranteed; we can all leave this Earth tomorrow.
I don't worry too much about my collection, I suppose I would if I never enjoyed or wore my rings out, but sentimentality runs in the family, especially with us women.

I also get a feeling of ease when I imagine my pieces being enjoyed by strangers if somewhere down the line my lineage decides to sell my collection.

Also Im not trying to hijack this thread but I have a question for you ladies, should the daughter have priority over the daughter in-law when it comes to the mother's jewelry? Let's say the daughter is very into jewelry, should she be able to keep what she wants or is it rude not to consider the daughter in-law even though she has her own mother? I've always wondered about this and what would be the right thing to do to please everyone.

It's very interesting to read everyone's replies (:

YES. For me. I’m fine with giving all my jewelry to my daughter and/or granddaughters. I’m not a person that you considers a DIL a daughter. I also don’t expect that of my MIL either.

 

[KristinTech]

I actually think of this subject fairly often. I'm 25 and have coveted my mother's beautiful collection of gold and platinum jewelry since I was around 12 years old.
I remember each piece and memories of her wearing them. I'm very sentimental though just like my mother and my daughter is as well. She's almost 4 years old and started to pick up an interest in jewelry a year ago when she saw me playing with my Jewelry box. She has her own tiny collection of sterling silver rings.
I plan to have more children and hope to have more girls as well, and will write down which pieces they enjoy the most and those will be given to them when I pass.
Sadly in this life, time isn't guaranteed; we can all leave this Earth tomorrow.
I don't worry too much about my collection, I suppose I would if I never enjoyed or wore my rings out, but sentimentality runs in the family, especially with us women.

I also get a feeling of ease when I imagine my pieces being enjoyed by strangers if somewhere down the line my lineage decides to sell my collection.

Also Im not trying to hijack this thread but I have a question for you ladies, should the daughter have priority over the daughter in-law when it comes to the mother's jewelry? Let's say the daughter is very into jewelry, should she be able to keep what she wants or is it rude not to consider the daughter in-law even though she has her own mother? I've always wondered about this and what would be the right thing to do to please everyone.

It's very interesting to read everyone's replies (:

I have one son. He has a March birthday, and I plan to get an aquamarine ring and pendant at some point—with the intent that they will be given to his future wife.

I have two daughters, and I suspect most of my collection will go to them.

I like how the queen does it... she gives “lifetime loans” to the ladies, but the jewels belong to the crown.

 

[4ever]

I have a two year old daughter who loves jewellery already, so if I don’t have any more children I hope she will want to wear and treasure my things one day.
I became interested (ok....obsessed) with jewellery while going through my mums shoes box of jewellery she has inherited. No big stones, nothing of much value, mostly sentimental pieces going back a few generations. It made me think about the person who owned it and wonder about that piece- when did you get this? What was the occasion? What did this mean to you? What was your life like?
But I also remember when I was very young being a little disappointed that there were no “significant” family pieces in that box. I’ve realised recently that part of my drive to buy really “good” pieces (modest by PS standards!) of jewellery instead of many smaller more “fun” and inexpensive items is because I feel like the nicer items might survive long enough, if I’m lucky, for my future great grandchildren to appreciate having somthing of value, beauty and quality and wonder about me and my life.
I also hope they don’t melt things down, everything comes back into fashion eventually

 

[Phoenix]

I have no children, so my nieces will get my jewellery. That is, if I don't sell them later. I don't think my nieces will treasure them for sentimental reasons, so it'd prob be better if I sell them, even if the funds are then distributed amongst my nieces.

 

[LJsapphire]

Mine is already antique (about 100 years old I'm told). I hope that I look after it well enough for it to last another 100 years. I only have one son so I will see what the future brings.

 

[Babyblue033]

I’ve realised recently that part of my drive to buy really “good” pieces (modest by PS standards!) of jewellery instead of many smaller more “fun” and inexpensive items is because I feel like the nicer items might survive long enough, if I’m lucky, for my future great grandchildren to appreciate having somthing of value, beauty and quality and wonder about me and my life.

Only recently I started thinking about this, before that I was only thinking about what I want and like in the moment. But getting older and having children made me think about what I might be leaving behind, and having had no significant pieces handed down to me from my mom or grandma, it made me want nicer things I can hand down to my kids and grand kids. So now I go for things with better value, I'd rather have fewer nicer pieces than tons of inexpensive things that will not last beyond my life time.

 

[TooPatient]

Daughter vs DIL question...

I think it all depends. Daughter, step daughter, ex-step daughter, DIL, etc etc etc. Same with nieces/cousins/etc who are blood relationship vs married in etc.

An example close to home:

My step father just lost his mother. He has two brothers, two sisters, a SIL, and a BIL. All retired with no kids at home and all living in the area. They seldom (like maybe monthly) visited as she was dying. Now that she is gone, they are focused on what they can sell and how much it is worth. Furniture and things that have been in the family for generations are being tagged for sale.

My mother (one of the DIL, been in the family for 25+ years) and step father both work. Between the two of them, they cared for her 24x7 (with about 4 hours of nurse on weekdays) for the last years of her life and did the same for his dad. She has a few pieces that she loves because of the memories and would enjoy using regularly. But she is "just" a DIL. The siblings have agreed (except my step father) that it is more important to sell so she can't have. (They won't even let her buy as they can "get a better price"). These are not people in need of money. They are all very well off. They just really don't care about "stuff" so want the money.

Personally, I would rather my pieces go to someone who will treasure them (and wear) rather than to people I seldom saw who just want money.

 

[icy_jade]

Daughter vs DIL question...

I think it all depends. Daughter, step daughter, ex-step daughter, DIL, etc etc etc. Same with nieces/cousins/etc who are blood relationship vs married in etc.

An example close to home:

My step father just lost his mother. He has two brothers, two sisters, a SIL, and a BIL. All retired with no kids at home and all living in the area. They seldom (like maybe monthly) visited as she was dying. Now that she is gone, they are focused on what they can sell and how much it is worth. Furniture and things that have been in the family for generations are being tagged for sale.

My mother (one of the DIL, been in the family for 25+ years) and step father both work. Between the two of them, they cared for her 24x7 (with about 4 hours of nurse on weekdays) for the last years of her life and did the same for his dad. She has a few pieces that she loves because of the memories and would enjoy using regularly. But she is "just" a DIL. The siblings have agreed (except my step father) that it is more important to sell so she can't have. (They won't even let her buy as they can "get a better price"). These are not people in need of money. They are all very well off. They just really don't care about "stuff" so want the money.

Personally, I would rather my pieces go to someone who will treasure them (and wear) rather than to people I seldom saw who just want money.

Wow that’s so sad. I feel bad for your mother.

I think most of us will hope that our things end up with people who will treasure them. I mean if I know when I will go I will probably try to liquidate my collections as I don’t expect my kids to love them like I do. I hope they will but who knows.

 

[kgizo]

My only concern is that my antique and vintage pieces are absolutely not pawned / scrapped. If whomever inherits them wants the $$ I just want them to sell to an antique jeweler so that the piece remains intact. I think of it as preserving a piece of history. I don’t have any children so the pieces will be given to female relatives, inlaws and friends.