DoctorD
Rough_Rock
- Joined
- Mar 4, 2011
- Messages
- 48
Have you been asked, "How much did you pay for that?" by a stranger pointing to some jewelry you are wearing? I've never found a satisfactory answer. Certainly it's "none of their business," but I don't want to say that. I've faced negativity about my jewelry, so when someone asks in a positive, friendly way, I'd like to prolong, rather than end, the conversation.
I've had a relationship with my jewelers for over 20 years. Years ago I invested in their business so, among other things, they could make the necessary trips to Antwerp, Johannesburg and New York to buy roughs. As a result, I pay a fraction of retail for their work. They tell me my bracelet would sell for $90-100K, but I paid a third of that.
I was poor as a kid, so I'm proud I can afford luxuries, and part of me would like to answer the question with the retail price. But that's not true, and seems like bragging. On the other hand, the discount price is misleading if the asker would like to find one himself; s/he won't be able to.
I've tried joking "More than I should have," or lying "it was a gift." To ask, "Why do you want to know?" seems antagonistic. Overhearing me being asked, a friend once blurted out (after a few drinks), "More than you make in a year!" I'd never say anything so rude (even if it's true).
A conversation started about jewelry, just like any topic, can lead to acquaintainship, or even friendship. Twice, it eventually led to my offering them a job. This shared interest strengthened bonds between my best friends and me over the years. We've been in "competition" to reach $100K, and then a quarter-mil, in our dress business-wear jewelry.
The reason I'm prompted to write now is as follows. At a recent industry dinner, a staff member said that after looking around, he concluded my wedding ring was worth more than the 200 men there combined. That gave me pause; I had never thought of such a comparison, it was a different twist on the "rags to riches" theme. The thought was so worthwhile and thought-provoking to me that I told him he was in for a raise. A guy nearby (someone we didn't know) probably overheard, because he asked the "how much" question, but his demeanor was negative and unpleasant. My staff suggested he leave. When he became insulting, I commanded him to zip it and get lost. He disobeyed my orders, so we walked him out a side door. Fool that he was, he threw the first punch, despite the fact that a fist comparison was like tennis balls to melons. My buds watched, but didn't participate, as I punished the guy. After several very satisfying backhands and punches, I told him I'd stop if he went back and apologized to everyone. As he did, I almost laughed at the clearly defined marks my rings had made on his face and shaved head as they swelled up.
This is the first time I resorted to violence over this, and although my sons loved the story, it certainly isn't the answer, either. It annoyed me to be without my favorite rings the next day while they were being cleaned.
BTW, there seem to be cultural differences regarding this. The askers seem always to be Latino. Your thoughts on this?
Have you been asked this question, or similar? How have you handled it? If your screen name is gender-neutral, let me know if you're male or female. Thank you in advance.
I've had a relationship with my jewelers for over 20 years. Years ago I invested in their business so, among other things, they could make the necessary trips to Antwerp, Johannesburg and New York to buy roughs. As a result, I pay a fraction of retail for their work. They tell me my bracelet would sell for $90-100K, but I paid a third of that.
I was poor as a kid, so I'm proud I can afford luxuries, and part of me would like to answer the question with the retail price. But that's not true, and seems like bragging. On the other hand, the discount price is misleading if the asker would like to find one himself; s/he won't be able to.
I've tried joking "More than I should have," or lying "it was a gift." To ask, "Why do you want to know?" seems antagonistic. Overhearing me being asked, a friend once blurted out (after a few drinks), "More than you make in a year!" I'd never say anything so rude (even if it's true).
A conversation started about jewelry, just like any topic, can lead to acquaintainship, or even friendship. Twice, it eventually led to my offering them a job. This shared interest strengthened bonds between my best friends and me over the years. We've been in "competition" to reach $100K, and then a quarter-mil, in our dress business-wear jewelry.
The reason I'm prompted to write now is as follows. At a recent industry dinner, a staff member said that after looking around, he concluded my wedding ring was worth more than the 200 men there combined. That gave me pause; I had never thought of such a comparison, it was a different twist on the "rags to riches" theme. The thought was so worthwhile and thought-provoking to me that I told him he was in for a raise. A guy nearby (someone we didn't know) probably overheard, because he asked the "how much" question, but his demeanor was negative and unpleasant. My staff suggested he leave. When he became insulting, I commanded him to zip it and get lost. He disobeyed my orders, so we walked him out a side door. Fool that he was, he threw the first punch, despite the fact that a fist comparison was like tennis balls to melons. My buds watched, but didn't participate, as I punished the guy. After several very satisfying backhands and punches, I told him I'd stop if he went back and apologized to everyone. As he did, I almost laughed at the clearly defined marks my rings had made on his face and shaved head as they swelled up.
This is the first time I resorted to violence over this, and although my sons loved the story, it certainly isn't the answer, either. It annoyed me to be without my favorite rings the next day while they were being cleaned.
BTW, there seem to be cultural differences regarding this. The askers seem always to be Latino. Your thoughts on this?
Have you been asked this question, or similar? How have you handled it? If your screen name is gender-neutral, let me know if you're male or female. Thank you in advance.
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