Girls,if a male co-worker try to flirt with you..

[tigertales]

You know, I never had a guy be vulgar or rude to me. I think conveying an air of respect helps. And the cads who used to be nasty were quickly labeled as such by whatever group I was in, and were ignored. I have a pretty sharp cold shoulder which I turn immediately if that line should ever be crossed. They get the message.
Of course if it's a work situation, then it's harder to escape. You turn it over to HR and alert co-workers. Group shunning helps.
I was watching the movie "Tootsie" over the weekend...funny to see in light of today's awareness. And, frankly, movies like this actually helped society advance in the right direction.

 

[ForteKitty]

DF, I see you're still asking a the same questions lol. I like to think my RBF keeps people away but if the attention is unwanted then I tell them to go away.

 

[Dancing Fire]

DF, I see you're still asking a the same questions lol. I like to think my RBF keeps people away but if the attention is unwanted then I tell them to go away.

FK, Are you still alive? Aren't you a mommy now?

 

[ForteKitty]

FK, Are you still alive? Aren't you a mommy now?

Yep. I'm on a mission to set/reset a few things and sell the rest. My son's not inheriting anything from me.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Yep. I'm on a mission to set/reset a few things and sell the rest. My son's not inheriting anything from me.

Congrats, you have two sons now?. Don't be a stranger on PS.

 

[ForteKitty]

Congrats, you have two sons now?. Don't be a stranger on PS.

Heck no, one and done. I'm too old to handle two kids!

 

[PintoBean]

Heck no, one and done. I'm too old to handle two kids!

Omg look what the santa ana winds blew in! Farting kitty! Nice to see you!

 

[ForteKitty]

Omg look what the santa ana winds blew in! Farting kitty! Nice to see you!

Ugh, Pronto, it's Forte... sniff

LOL

 

[PintoBean]

Ugh, Pronto, it's Forte... sniff

LOL

Sniff that forte fart generated by the pinto bean eating kitty, PRONTO!

 

[LaylaR]

When I first graduated and started working I was subjected to some real entitled jerks as coworkers. I used to excuse it as "boys will be boys" even going so far as to make sure I was never alone with any of them, or adjusting my schedule to avoid them as much as possible.

However, for years now I have worked with professional men who are respectful, sincere, and friendly at work without crossing any lines. Men who have become friends. And who have never made me feel uncomfortable or threatened. Having experienced that, I have much higher standards and expectations and I tend to be really intolerant of any type of inappropriate sexual behavior these days. Especially since my husband once said something really smart, he said that excusing inappropriate male behavior as 'boys will be boys' is insulting to men because the implication is that men are hopeless and incapable of acting appropriately.

There's also time, place and manner for anything like that. If we're actually at work. No. If we're out to lunch, but during a work day and we are coming and going to the workplace. No. But, if we see each other in a bar, and I'm single and you are and you are just testing the waters a bit and fully back off and apologize if rejected. Then that's different. But at any event or during any time that is work related in any way: a conference, anything: no. Act professional. If you don't know how, ask someone.

I genuinely don't know how I'd react if a co-worker made a pass at me these days. Especially given that I'm married and I never EVER invite any type of flirtation in thought or deed. I think I'd be so taken by surprise I'd probably gape at him, speechless. After I recovered, as long as he was a good person, I'd probably tell him that his judgement was flawed, and that I will forget the incident the one time. But if it happened again, or there was any retaliation for rejection, I would report it to my superiors and let them deal with it.

But I trust my current bosses 100%. If I didn't? Or I still worked at a large company? I wouldn't give him a pass at all. I'd report him to HR right away. I've seen too much happen in large companies to give anyone a pass for anything at one anymore though. You have to get everything that happens to you on record as soon as possible, because if you don't then you are viewed as lying (because you didn't report it at the time) or as inviting the behavior (because you didn't report it at the time) or complicit (same). You can't win. If you don't report and something happens you are screwed, and you do report and you are still screwed because you are seen as a complainer or a tattle tale or 'not a team player.' But if you've reported the incident -- you can sue if you have to and you have documentation to back your claims up. Always document everything. And when you do report, do it in writing, or if you report it verbally, you follow it up with an email.