Friends who steal ring ideas??

[bee*]

Date: 3/13/2008 4:11:39 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I''ll have to go with Lyra and the Captain on this one. There are lots of beautiful rings in the world, and most of them look like one that has already been done. Baby names are a bit more sensitive, but really, that matters very little, too, in the overall scheme of things. I know of people who named their baby the same as our third child, and I was flattered that they liked it that much!

ditto this (without the child thing as I don''t have any!!). If my friend wants the same ring as me, I''d be flattered.

 

[SoftwareGuy]

I say, let the friend copy the design, but don''t help her anymore than you already did.
Look forward to the day when you two do a comparison and see how disappointed she will be when your ring will look better and your stone will be sparklier.

>

...back to lurking.

 

[sera]

Halo rings can vary SO much... if she just wanted a halo ring, kewl. If she wanted my halo ring, not so much. I wouldn''t even mind helping her find a super nice halo- I just wouldn''t want it a copy of mine.

Like was mentioned, she was probably just super excited seeing the ring... I''m sure we all remember that OH.MY.GOSH.I.WANT.ONE.OF.THOSE! moment when we first saw a Leon. And really, Leon could even make you both two very different, equally beautiful halos.

 

[CDNinNYC]

Date: 3/13/2008 5:31:06 PM
Author: tberube
I must be in the minority of people who don''t really understand someone being upset because another person wears a ring like yours. What if you chose a RB solitare? Soooo many women would have the exact same ring.

I used to be friends with a girl who got engaged with a three stone ring with an RB center and pear sides. When I saw her ring I congratulated her and noted that it happened to be similar to the ring another of my friends just received. I thought it was cool that they shared the same taste in jewelry. She thought it was a cheap shot at her ring. I guess a couple months later, her fiance made the mistake of recognizing her ring style on one of his female friends, and they had a huge fight about it.

I always found that strange. I mean, whenever I see someone with a halo, an EC or an EC halo, by God...I''m ecstatic! Full of questions and wanting to compare notes...I feel akin to that person! I never understood why my (ex) friend so coveted the style of her ring.

BUT...on the other hand...I have had friends exactly copy a piece of clothing and wear it on the same day, and that kinda bothers me. So I suppose if your friend were to copy down the model number of your chosen ering and have her boyfriend buy it for her, then that''s kind of obnoxious. But if you helped her to find ''the'' right look for her and it happens to be similar to yours, then you should feel good that you have the taste and sense to lead her to the right thing, and that you share that taste with her.

dunno, just my spare pennies.

I agree with tberube. I also don''t see that much of a difference between your friend''s reaction and your desire to have a ring like Jessica Alba''s. Treat it as a form of flattery.

 

[coatimundi_org]

Date: 3/13/2008 6:35:43 PM
Author: bee*

Date: 3/13/2008 4:11:39 PM

Author: diamondseeker2006

I''ll have to go with Lyra and the Captain on this one. There are lots of beautiful rings in the world, and most of them look like one that has already been done. Baby names are a bit more sensitive, but really, that matters very little, too, in the overall scheme of things. I know of people who named their baby the same as our third child, and I was flattered that they liked it that much!

ditto this (without the child thing as I don''t have any!!). If my friend wants the same ring as me, I''d be flattered.

Yah, I''d be flattered too. Also, once you actually receive the ring, she would see it anyway, and want the same one then. Try not to let it bum your design process. It''s a reinforcement of your excellent taste!

 

[niccia]

My friend thought she had totally different taste in rings than me, but after seeing my new ering she says she wants something very similar herself now. It doesn''t bother me at all. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Just make sure you get your''s first

 

[enbcfsobe]

i think i would understand better if this really seemed to be about the fact that this is your engagement ring and should be unique as opposed to being about whether you are a trendsetter and the first to have the next hot thing. if you really feel that it will bother you if she ends up with the same ring because you want the symbol of your betrothal to be unique and that it is important to you that it not be a commodity to be copied, like a purse or shoes, then tell her that, gently, and reiterate your idea that you keep up with each other over the choices you are making so that you each have a wonderfully unique ring, though they may share some similar elements.

 

[Imdanny]

Date: 3/13/2008 3:00:36 PM
Author: lyra
Okay, I''ll be the lone dissenter. I couldn''t care less if someone has the same anything as me. When I was 20 years younger, stupid things would bug me, like people wanting to decorate the same as me (same paint, same products, etc.). I freaked when my SIL who was 7 weeks ''more'' pregnant than me mentioned naming her baby the name we had already settled on. I LOL at that now. She was only looking at it as a second name, but I was aghast that she wasn''t paying attention to what we''d already laid claim to. The anguish--she mentioned this right during her baby shower, the nerve!

I do feel for your situation though. It would be a little close for comfort. You could just say your FI is secretly looking after all the details because you want to be surprised. Something like that. Let her find her own way. Who knows, she may change her mind a few times before it comes right down to it. She may go in another direction completely. You could even show her other ideas that you ''just know would look great on *HER*!!''. Good luck. Try not to sweat it. Your ring will be unique no matter what. And 20 years from now (or less) you may even be upgrading to something totally different anyway. Happened to me.

No, not the lone dissenter. Come on, if you didn''t want her to have access to that information you shouldn''t have shared it, and I can think of a lot worse problems than someone having a similar 2- 2.5 ct diamond ring. Sorry.

 

[diamondfan]

I think you get pissed and protective, but then look at the big picture.

FACT: She did not even know what a halo was, and though she thinks she loves it, she has not tried it on and may hate it on her finger.

FACT: Maybe yours will be a bit different, even if she does end up with one, so try not to worry.

I would keep the rest of my plans under wraps. If she asks outright, I would act a bit clueless and change the topic. And tell your man to not discuss it with his pal if it comes up, again, be vague and just move on to another topic.

She may end up with who knows what in the long run...and, yours will be special because it came from your man, and you will know more about cut and a good stone, so that will make your ring amazing!

 

[CrookedRock]

Diamondfan... I agree!

IMDanny... A little harsh. I mean, didn''t you come here to pick out the best ring possible? If your best guy friend (I think you are a guy

) said to you, hey what you are getting sounds good to me, just grab me the same thing for my girlfriend... How would you feel...

I don''t think Cali is ticked per se... but she just wants this to be her thing.Her friend can get whatever she wants but Cali sure doesn''t have to help her by letting her copy every little detail. Besides Cali is getting a Leon, and friend gets a trellis... LOL
(Please don''t attack me for the trellis thing ladies, I think thery are great, just know that Leon doesn''t love em)

 

[CaliBling]

Date: 3/14/2008 8:51:41 AM
Author: CrookedRock
Diamondfan... I agree!

IMDanny... A little harsh. I mean, didn''t you come here to pick out the best ring possible? If your best guy friend (I think you are a guy

) said to you, hey what you are getting sounds good to me, just grab me the same thing for my girlfriend... How would you feel...

I don''t think Cali is ticked per se... but she just wants this to be her thing.Her friend can get whatever she wants but Cali sure doesn''t have to help her by letting her copy every little detail. Besides Cali is getting a Leon, and friend gets a trellis... LOL
(Please don''t attack me for the trellis thing ladies, I think thery are great, just know that Leon doesn''t love em)

Thanks for the support there Crooked- and don''t worry, about the Trellis thing- they are lovely btw, those that who have actually read the entire post will get the inside joke!!

Thanks for letting me vent everyone- and while this isn''t a "REAL" problem in the grand scheme of things (I understand this completly)- I was a littled irked, and needed to vent.

Thank you for listening, and your words- whether you agreed with me or not- were insightful. I have decided to no longer bring this topic up with my girlfriend, and if she does, I will either gently change the topic, or discuss a completely different style or look. Thanks again everyone one! It was literally like a group therapy session

 

[diamondfan]

Glad to be of help, we will send you the bill!