Ever do something nice for someone but get shut down?

[Deactivated member 42515]

Today, I was in a shopping complex. Somebody left a shopping cart in the middle of the road and this elderly lady stopped and couldn't get thru. So I jumped out of my car and ran the shopping cart back. I turned around to smile at the lady and OH MY GOD, I've never had anybody glare at me so meanly before!!! It wasn't even my cart! I was just driving through!

I feel like I did a nice thing... I'm not expecting a medal or anything nor do I do nice things just to get credit for them but this lady was outright mean! She just glared at me the WHOLE time I ran to my car...

Has anyone else ever done something nice but gotten a reaction you never thought you'd get?

 

[soocool]

A number of years ago when I was driving DD to preschool I noticed a neighbor's front door was wide open. There were no cars in the driveway and I knew they never parked their cars in the garage. No other neighbors were home either. I called over there and no answer so I called the policevto check it out. The police came checked it out and the inside of the door had a key in the lock. The officer then locked the door and took the key and would not give it to me. He said the homeowner can pick it up at the station. When the neighbor got home from work and listened to my message she got annoyed at me and said that the wind probably blew the door open and I could have just pulled it shut.

I learned my lesson and vowed even if I saw someone carrying stuff out of the house that I would not call the police because you never know maybe they could be moving or something.

Fast forward 6 years later, they divorced, sold the house, and new neighbors gave me their work numbers and asked if I ever saw something wrong to call the police. Well a week after new neighbors moved in I saw both garage doors open. No cars in sight. I called them and the police. It seems the old neighbor broke in to get stuff out of the basement and garage that he never removed before the house closing.

 

[soocool]

A number of years ago when I was driving DD to preschool I noticed a neighbor's front door was wide open. There were no cars in the driveway and I knew they never parked their cars in the garage. No other neighbors were home either. I called over there and no answer so I called the policevto check it out. The police came checked it out and the inside of the door had a key in the lock. The officer then locked the door and took the key and would not give it to me. He said the homeowner can pick it up at the station. When the neighbor got home from work and listened to my message she got annoyed at me and said that the wind probably blew the door open and I could have just pulled it shut.

I learned my lesson and vowed even if I saw someone carrying stuff out of the house that I would not call the police because you never know maybe they could be moving or something.

Fast forward 6 years later, they divorced, sold the house, and new neighbors gave me their work numbers and asked if I ever saw something wrong to call the police. Well a week after new neighbors moved in I saw both garage doors open. No cars in sight. I called them and the police. It seems the old neighbor broke in to get stuff out of the basement and garage that he never removed before the house closing.

 

[Loves Vintage]

I can't recall any specific instances like this, but I have to ask - was it a Whole Foods lot, by chance?

 

[justginger]

I don't remember any particular cases of someone actually being mean to me for being nice, but I do frequently hold doors or go out of my way to chase people down when they drop items, only to not receive any sort of real acknowledgement or thanks. I persist though, because when someone does really appreciate it, it makes it worthwhile.

 

[Missy]

Oh yes, the old saying "no good deed goes unpunished" certainly holds true in my experiences. However, like JG, I continue to do what I consider to be the right thing to do. Though it does give me pause at times knowing I might be given reason to regret it.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Nothing to add right now, just cracking up about this Fun way to start a monday...

 

[erinl]

Today, I was in a shopping complex. Somebody left a shopping cart in the middle of the road and this elderly lady stopped and couldn't get thru. So I jumped out of my car and ran the shopping cart back. I turned around to smile at the lady and OH MY GOD, I've never had anybody glare at me so meanly before!!! It wasn't even my cart! I was just driving through!

I feel like I did a nice thing... I'm not expecting a medal or anything nor do I do nice things just to get credit for them but this lady was outright mean! She just glared at me the WHOLE time I ran to my car...

Has anyone else ever done something nice but gotten a reaction you never thought you'd get?

Maybe the lady assumed that you had left the basket yourself? I don't like to stereotype, but elderly people can come across as really grouchy because they can be confused about what is actually going on. My grandfather-- the most kind, logical, helpful person I ever knew, had dementia in his later years and he would get irrationally angry. He drove for longer than he should have and he got into some arguments several times while driving. I think he got confused and would then get angry. He even came home with a black eye once and we have no idea what transpired. Again, he should have had his keys taken away long before he decided to stop driving (I digress)

On a reverse note, I have been in situations where people would not stop trying to be helpful, even when I said I was ok. Recently, I was walking into a very nice restaurant, carrying my 2 year old son (he had fallen asleep in the car and wasn't in the mood for walking). I didn't see a curb and i twisted my ankle and fell while holding him. I took the brunt of the fall, I never let go of him and my son did not touch any pavement, he actually took to his feet when i fell to his walking level. A couple women rushed up to me and kept talking about the baby being ok, wanting to grab him etc etc. I kept saying thank you, I'm ok, and they wouldn't leave me be. I had to kind of raise my voice and say I was ok, as I had my sisters with me and there was no need to help-- son was not crying or anything either. I am sure they thought I was rude in the end of the transaction, but I was embarrassed and I just wanted to move along and not make a scene

 

[iLander]

I've posted this before, but it still hurts:

My new DIL and son came over and I explained to her that I was looking forward to being friends with her. That my MIL wasn't very friendly, so I was hoping to Not be that kind of MIL. That I looked forward to shopping with her and DD and enjoying each other's company. I was very enthusiastic.

She just looked at me and said, deadpan, "I'm not in a very open place in my life right now."

The whole family was shocked. I was crushed.

I now actively dislike my DIL and will never make an effort again. She turned me into that kind of MIL.

 

[Missy]

I've posted this before, but it still hurts:

My new DIL and son came over and I explained to her that I was looking forward to being friends with her. That my MIL wasn't very friendly, so I was hoping to Not be that kind of MIL. That I looked forward to shopping with her and DD and enjoying each other's company. I was very enthusiastic.

She just looked at me and said, deadpan, "I'm not in a very open place in my life right now."

The whole family was shocked. I was crushed.

I now actively dislike my DIL and will never make an effort again. She turned me into that kind of MIL.

Awww, iLander, you are not old enough (or I am not young enough) to be my MIL but I wish you were! If m MIL had been that warm and welcoming to me I would have been thrilled! Your DIL is a real fool and I am sorry for her. Big hugs to you!!

 

[Anastasia]

YayTacori, I feel sure that this woman assumed that it was your cart. I can't even fathom any other reason that she would have had that reaction.

Soooocool, that story is crazy!

 

[iheartscience]

I've posted this before, but it still hurts:

My new DIL and son came over and I explained to her that I was looking forward to being friends with her. That my MIL wasn't very friendly, so I was hoping to Not be that kind of MIL. That I looked forward to shopping with her and DD and enjoying each other's company. I was very enthusiastic.

She just looked at me and said, deadpan, "I'm not in a very open place in my life right now."

The whole family was shocked. I was crushed.

I now actively dislike my DIL and will never make an effort again. She turned me into that kind of MIL.

YIKES, what a rotten person.

 

[Missy]

Today, I was in a shopping complex. Somebody left a shopping cart in the middle of the road and this elderly lady stopped and couldn't get thru. So I jumped out of my car and ran the shopping cart back. I turned around to smile at the lady and OH MY GOD, I've never had anybody glare at me so meanly before!!! It wasn't even my cart! I was just driving through!

I feel like I did a nice thing... I'm not expecting a medal or anything nor do I do nice things just to get credit for them but this lady was outright mean! She just glared at me the WHOLE time I ran to my car...

Has anyone else ever done something nice but gotten a reaction you never thought you'd get?

Maybe the lady assumed that you had left the basket yourself? I don't like to stereotype, but elderly people can come across as really grouchy because they can be confused about what is actually going on. My grandfather-- the most kind, logical, helpful person I ever knew, had dementia in his later years and he would get irrationally angry. He drove for longer than he should have and he got into some arguments several times while driving. I think he got confused and would then get angry. He even came home with a black eye once and we have no idea what transpired. Again, he should have had his keys taken away long before he decided to stop driving (I digress)

On a reverse note, I have been in situations where people would not stop trying to be helpful, even when I said I was ok. Recently, I was walking into a very nice restaurant, carrying my 2 year old son (he had fallen asleep in the car and wasn't in the mood for walking). I didn't see a curb and i twisted my ankle and fell while holding him. I took the brunt of the fall, I never let go of him and my son did not touch any pavement, he actually took to his feet when i fell to his walking level. A couple women rushed up to me and kept talking about the baby being ok, wanting to grab him etc etc. I kept saying thank you, I'm ok, and they wouldn't leave me be. I had to kind of raise my voice and say I was ok, as I had my sisters with me and there was no need to help-- son was not crying or anything either. I am sure they thought I was rude in the end of the transaction, but I was embarrassed and I just wanted to move along and not make a scene

So glad you and your son were OK! I admit, it can be embarrassing when people rush over to help you (especially when you are OK) and especially when you are like me- a klutz! But, I much prefer that scenario to one where no one cares. I totally understand where you are coming from though...just saying I prefer it that way to the other.

 

[erinl]

iLander--

What does your son think about this? I guess my question is, what is her relationship with her mother? Maybe it has been such a landmine that she doesn't want to open herself up to be hurt again?

I always try to think of what may be at the root of ridiculously rude behavior?

 

[decodelighted]

Ha! That lady totally thought it was your cart and you irresponsible lazy little piece o' pie was FINALLY getting off her no good buttocks to clear the way for her elders!!!!!!!! No wonder she wanted to send you Eye Daggers from Hell! Every situation has two sides. If you wanted to let her know that it wasn't your cart after all -- perhaps a well timed "YOU'RE WELCOME" screamed in her direction with a co-mingled sarcastic full arms length shrug might have worked nicely. And if not, there are assorted other hand gestures that might communicate your further message at that point.

 

[iheartscience]

Ha! That lady totally thought it was your cart and you irresponsible lazy little piece o' pie was FINALLY getting off her no good buttocks to clear the way for her elders!!!!!!!! No wonder she wanted to send you Eye Daggers from Hell! Every situation has two sides. If you wanted to let her know that it wasn't your cart after all -- perhaps a well timed "YOU'RE WELCOME" screamed in her direction with a co-mingled sarcastic full arms length shrug might have worked nicely. And if not, there are assorted other hand gestures that might communicate your further message at that point.

HA I am totally the person who says "YOU'RE WELCOME" when I do something nice for someone and they don't say thank you. I doubt it makes them thankful but it makes me feel better!

 

[iheartscience]

Oh and I also say "THANKS SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR HELP" when I'm leaving a store where no one helps me or even greets me. I worked retail for years and at the very least you're supposed to greet customers within their first 10 seconds in the store.

(I know this may shock those of you who thought I wasn't particularly confrontational. )

 

[VRBeauty]

Long(ish) story - sorry about that!

Earlier this year I was driving to the post office when, a few blocks from the post office, I see a mini dachshund running on the sidewalk. I think it's strange, but it's a fairly busy street, no chance to stop. I'm thinking I might circle back after I do what I need to do at the post office. When I get to the post office - there's another mini dachshund in the parking lot, with two or three people trying to corral it! I go in and mail my package, when I come back it's down to two people and the dog is till eluding them. One of them says it belongs to some gal who was there trying to catch it - she got kicked out of her hotel and was trying to find her FIVE dachshunds that got away from her! The owner was nowhere to be seen, however. But I hate the idea of a little dog running around on a busy street, so I sat patiently sat there and tried to entice the pooch to come to me, and eventually it came close but of course as soon as I reached for it, it scampered away. (I'm NOT a dog person, by the way). Repeat that scenario a few times, then the dog decides to run across the street to the parking lot of a large office complex, getting grazed by a car in the process.

So of course I go across the street too... and again the dog lets me get close then scampers away as soon as I try to reach for it. Some guy going into the gym sees me and tries to help, but to no avail. I do manage to get the dog cornered, but it snarls if I get anywhere near him. The guy calls animal control and leaves to go to his gym. I was hesitant to call animal control, especially since it seems like the owner might not have the money to spring her dog, but it seems a better option than letting the dog run around in traffic! As I'm waiting for animal control to get there, I decide to try one last thing. I take off my parka and throw it over the little guy, and - victory! I'm able to pick him up! He's snarly and wriggling to get away, but he's small enough that I can keep him under control. By the time I get back to my car he's relaxed and practically licking my face! The whole ordeal probably took about 45 minutes to an hour.

Now I have a little dachshund in my possession and no idea what to do with him. I'm thinking take him home and place a craigs list ad, when it occurs to me that there are only about four hotels in the area - and decide to somehow canvas them in case the story was true... maybe one of them can tell me something that will help me find its owner. These are low cost motor hotel type things, two stories built around a parking lot and swimming pool. I drive up to the first one and as I'm walking towards the office I see one of the maids outside the building. I ask her about a woman with some dogs, pointing to the dog. The maid says yes, the woman is on the second floor - but wait! There she is now! A tall, 30-is woman is approaching us, with one little dog on a leash. I say something to get her attention, get the dog out of my car and hand it to her.

She might have said thank you - but I don't think so. Mainly she just grabbed her dog, turned around, and went back up the stairs. No asking where her dog had been for the past hour, no questions about where I found it or how I found her to get it back to her... nothing. Needless to say I wasn't expecting any sort of reward, but I did think some show of gratitude might have been appropriate!

 

[Haven]

People can be so rotten sometimes!

This didn't happen to me, but it happened to my mom years ago when I was out shopping with her.
My mom and I were in a craft store and she was buying a lot of Fimo clay. The clay wasn't cheap, and she was buying about $50 worth of it. The cashier rang her up and said the total was something ridiculously low, like $17. My mom said, "Oh, that can't be right," and so the cashier spits back, "Ma'am, this clay is not cheap, okay? I'm just ringing it up, I don't set the prices."

My mom said something like , "I know it isn't cheap, that's why I think this total is incorrect." The cashier continued to argue with my mom, and was so loud and disdainful doing it, and she ultimately made a face at the customer waiting in line behind my mother, so my mom finally said, "Okay, you're right. Here's a twenty."

 

[VRBeauty]

People can be so rotten sometimes!

This didn't happen to me, but it happened to my mom years ago when I was out shopping with her.
My mom and I were in a craft store and she was buying a lot of Fimo clay. The clay wasn't cheap, and she was buying about $50 worth of it. The cashier rang her up and said the total was something ridiculously low, like $17. My mom said, "Oh, that can't be right," and so the cashier spits back, "Ma'am, this clay is not cheap, okay? I'm just ringing it up, I don't set the prices."

My mom said something like , "I know it isn't cheap, that's why I think this total is incorrect." The cashier continued to argue with my mom, and was so loud and disdainful doing it, and she ultimately made a face at the customer waiting in line behind my mother, so my mom finally said, "Okay, you're right. Here's a twenty."

LOL - It sounds to me like your mother earned her discount!

 

[erinl]

Long(ish) story - sorry about that!

Earlier this year I was driving to the post office when, a few blocks from the post office, I see a mini dachshund running on the sidewalk. I think it's strange, but it's a fairly busy street, no chance to stop. I'm thinking I might circle back after I do what I need to do at the post office. When I get to the post office - there's another mini dachshund in the parking lot, with two or three people trying to corral it! I go in and mail my package, when I come back it's down to two people and the dog is till eluding them. One of them says it belongs to some gal who was there trying to catch it - she got kicked out of her hotel and was trying to find her FIVE dachshunds that got away from her! The owner was nowhere to be seen, however. But I hate the idea of a little dog running around on a busy street, so I sat patiently sat there and tried to entice the pooch to come to me, and eventually it came close but of course as soon as I reached for it, it scampered away. (I'm NOT a dog person, by the way). Repeat that scenario a few times, then the dog decides to run across the street to the parking lot of a large office complex, getting grazed by a car in the process.

So of course I go across the street too... and again the dog lets me get close then scampers away as soon as I try to reach for it. Some guy going into the gym sees me and tries to help, but to no avail. I do manage to get the dog cornered, but it snarls if I get anywhere near him. The guy calls animal control and leaves to go to his gym. I was hesitant to call animal control, especially since it seems like the owner might not have the money to spring her dog, but it seems a better option than letting the dog run around in traffic! As I'm waiting for animal control to get there, I decide to try one last thing. I take off my parka and throw it over the little guy, and - victory! I'm able to pick him up! He's snarly and wriggling to get away, but he's small enough that I can keep him under control. By the time I get back to my car he's relaxed and practically licking my face! The whole ordeal probably took about 45 minutes to an hour.

Now I have a little dachshund in my possession and no idea what to do with him. I'm thinking take him home and place a craigs list ad, when it occurs to me that there are only about four hotels in the area - and decide to somehow canvas them in case the story was true... maybe one of them can tell me something that will help me find its owner. These are low cost motor hotel type things, two stories built around a parking lot and swimming pool. I drive up to the first one and as I'm walking towards the office I see one of the maids outside the building. I ask her about a woman with some dogs, pointing to the dog. The maid says yes, the woman is on the second floor - but wait! There she is now! A tall, 30-is woman is approaching us, with one little dog on a leash. I say something to get her attention, get the dog out of my car and hand it to her.

She might have said thank you - but I don't think so. Mainly she just grabbed her dog, turned around, and went back up the stairs. No asking where her dog had been for the past hour, no questions about where I found it or how I found her to get it back to her... nothing. Needless to say I wasn't expecting any sort of reward, but I did think some show of gratitude might have been appropriate!

Maybe she was hoping the dachsunds would run away! Five dogs and living in a hotel sounds like she had all kinds of problems!

 

[Missy]

Ha! That lady totally thought it was your cart and you irresponsible lazy little piece o' pie was FINALLY getting off her no good buttocks to clear the way for her elders!!!!!!!! No wonder she wanted to send you Eye Daggers from Hell! Every situation has two sides. If you wanted to let her know that it wasn't your cart after all -- perhaps a well timed "YOU'RE WELCOME" screamed in her direction with a co-mingled sarcastic full arms length shrug might have worked nicely. And if not, there are assorted other hand gestures that might communicate your further message at that point.

Yes, I do this totally. I will yell you're welcome. I try to refrain from using bad language though at times I am sorely tempted.

Oh and I also say "THANKS SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR HELP" when I'm leaving a store where no one helps me or even greets me. I worked retail for years and at the very least you're supposed to greet customers within their first 10 seconds in the store.

(I know this may shock those of you who thought I wasn't particularly confrontational. )

I do the same. I never did in the past but it has all become so absurd (the rude behavior that seems to be everywhere) that I now do that. I say you are so very welcome when they don't thank me for doing something helpful or something similar. I mean, people seem to think I am there for their benefit- to hold the door open, to pick up fallen items etc. Not so much as a thank you. OTOH, when someone does something nice for me I thank them warmly. Positive reinforcement because I am trying to get civility to become contagious since rudeness seems to have spread these last few years...I am hoping civility can do the same!

VRBeauty- what the heck is wrong with people???!!!! Perhaps she was in shock from having to find her 5 dogs and she wasn't thinking clearly? Ugh, I usually like to give the benefit of the doubt but doubt is winning big time these days.

Haven, I agree, you mom earned that discount!

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of lovely people with great manners around but it seems the rudely behaved ones are on the increase. Perhaps it's the economy, I don't know. But I know it makes me feel better to be kind and nice and it makes me feel worse when others behave rudely. No reason because it takes more energy to be rude than to be nice!

 

[rainydaze]

Ugh, I'm sorry she glared at you like that. I was also thinking she must have thought the cart was yours to begin with, and it's a good point that her elderly status may have contributed confusion to her understanding of the situation.

I always hold the door for someone behind me, and once I had a woman say angrily 'You don't have to hold that for me!' She was *right there* so I wasn't going to drop it on her even after she said that, and she was pissed that I didn't! SO WEIRD! It's simply a polite gesture, why the need for hostility? I was also leaving an upscale restaurant once, and held the door open for three older couples who were going in. All three of the women and two of the men passed through without so much as *looking* at me, much less thanking me or acknowledging me, but the last of them to go in did manage to say something (I think it was even to the effect of acknowledging their lack of acknowledgement) and I just couldn't help but respond with 'Your friends need to learn their manners!'. I was so happy that for once I spoke up for myself, but I was shaking as we walked back to the car.

 

[iLander]

I've posted this before, but it still hurts:

My new DIL and son came over and I explained to her that I was looking forward to being friends with her. That my MIL wasn't very friendly, so I was hoping to Not be that kind of MIL. That I looked forward to shopping with her and DD and enjoying each other's company. I was very enthusiastic.

She just looked at me and said, deadpan, "I'm not in a very open place in my life right now."

The whole family was shocked. I was crushed.

I now actively dislike my DIL and will never make an effort again. She turned me into that kind of MIL.

Awww, iLander, you are not old enough (or I am not young enough) to be my MIL but I wish you were! If m MIL had been that warm and welcoming to me I would have been thrilled! Your DIL is a real fool and I am sorry for her. Big hugs to you!!

iLander--

What does your son think about this? I guess my question is, what is her relationship with her mother? Maybe it has been such a landmine that she doesn't want to open herself up to be hurt again?

I always try to think of what may be at the root of ridiculously rude behavior?

YIKES, what a rotten person.

Missy- Thanks, sweetie. When we met her for the first time, I asked DS what she thought and he said "She likes Dad and Sister". And then he stopped. I thought I was very nice that day, and most people like me when I meet them. I'm very friendly . . .
Erini-I thought so too at first, but DS and DIL spend all the holidays with her mom, and her facebook showed her taking a pie baking class with her mom. It appears to be just me. DS is never away from her, so I have no idea what his take is on anything. I gave up.
Thing2-I have to agree. My BFF talked me into just being nice, but my relationship with DS and DIL is distant and polite at best. I miss my son, we used to laugh and have fun as a family, but that's turned into awkward occasional lunches. DD misses her brother.

 

[davi_el_mejor]

The flipside to these stories...

Yesterday I was leaving a parking lot and an older lady was leaving as well. I was coming down the road to the stop sign and she was coming up perpendicular to us. I saw she was not paying attention and slowed way down. She pulled into the road with out looking. As she was turning she saw us and did a an "OMG I'M SO SORRY" face and put her hand over her mouth to say she was sorry.

I couldn't get mad at her. Just couldn't. She knew she messed up and was sorry.

Had she not even acknowledged it I would told her off from the privacy of my own car LOL

 

[erinl]

iLander--

I am so sorry about that-- it is so sad when families get torn apart in some way due to in-laws. I have an ok relationship with my MIL, but it can be very hard. Hopefully your son will get a bit of a backbone as time goes on.

I had a reverse situation with my MIL and my husband. He wanted to take her out to dinner as a thank you for something she had done. We had a babysitting complication and I suggested that he and his mother go out together without me. I thought it was a nice gesture, as they don't get to spend nearly as much time together now since he is married and has little kids. I actually see his mother more than he does at this point, so it wasn't like I avoid her all the time. She is single, so I thought it might be nice for her son to take her out on his own. Somehow she took it as a personal affront. I feel that she and my SIL spin things to make me look bad all the time.

 

[VRBeauty]

Had she not even acknowledged it I would told her off from the privacy of my own car LOL

Oh, the ways I tell people off from the privacy of my own car!

iLander - your story is heartbreaking. I'm so sorry.

 

[erinl]

Oh, the ways I tell people off from the privacy of my own car!



Ha ha-- I have to be careful what I say in the privacy of my own car--little pitchers have big ears! My kids will call cars jerks now-- they have heard me use the word too many times! The names could be worse though

 

[gem_anemone]

I've posted this before, but it still hurts:

My new DIL and son came over and I explained to her that I was looking forward to being friends with her. That my MIL wasn't very friendly, so I was hoping to Not be that kind of MIL. That I looked forward to shopping with her and DD and enjoying each other's company. I was very enthusiastic.

She just looked at me and said, deadpan, "I'm not in a very open place in my life right now."

The whole family was shocked. I was crushed.

I now actively dislike my DIL and will never make an effort again. She turned me into that kind of MIL.

Sorry!! I can't believe she said that to you! I gotta be honest though and let you know that I would have felt kind of weird if my MIL stated out loud that she "wanted to be friends" as though before she said that she didn't? However, in no way, shape, or form would I have returned that comment with something so soul-crushing! The only acceptable response to that in my eyes is "of course, me too!" with a big smile..... regardless of what place in life I was! She sounds horrible!

 

[Deactivated member 42515]

Ha! That lady totally thought it was your cart and you irresponsible lazy little piece o' pie was FINALLY getting off her no good buttocks to clear the way for her elders!!!!!!!! No wonder she wanted to send you Eye Daggers from Hell! Every situation has two sides. If you wanted to let her know that it wasn't your cart after all -- perhaps a well timed "YOU'RE WELCOME" screamed in her direction with a co-mingled sarcastic full arms length shrug might have worked nicely. And if not, there are assorted other hand gestures that might communicate your further message at that point.

I wrote this in bed before I fell asleep and forgot to add a crucial thing. I DID in fact do a gesture and kind of a mouthing that this isn't my cart. And after I ran back to the car, I told my friends I'm gonna park and go give her a piece I my mind but they all talked me out of it. Argh....

iLander- I'm sorry about your DIL, you tried to be a good caring MIL and those do not come everyday!