Downsizing?

[realhauswife]

Has anyone ever downsized their engagement ring?

I've been thinking about selling my 2ct diamond and using the money to buy a smaller, lower profile engagement ring. I've had the stone almost a year and it just feels SO HUGE still on my size 4 finger. I've tried to get used to it-- had it reset, wore it all the time, put it away for weeks, etc. It just feels so large and I am constantly just too aware that I'm wearing it if that makes sense? It's not crazy to see 2-3ct rings where I live but I often feel uncomfortable wearing it.

I have received a few quotes for it and obviously would take a loss from what I paid, but it would still be a substantial budget for a smaller ring. I'm just feeling like I'm sick of the stone (which was an upgrade!) and want something less flashy. It just doesn't feel like me.

Any thoughts? Experiences?

 

[MamaBee]

Has anyone ever downsized their engagement ring?

I've been thinking about selling my 2ct diamond and using the money to buy a smaller, lower profile engagement ring. I've had the stone almost a year and it just feels SO HUGE still on my size 4 finger. I've tried to get used to it-- had it reset, wore it all the time, put it away for weeks, etc. It just feels so large and I am constantly just too aware that I'm wearing it if that makes sense? It's not crazy to see 2-3ct rings where I live but I often feel uncomfortable wearing it.

I have received a few quotes for it and obviously would take a loss from what I paid, but it would still be a substantial budget for a smaller ring. I'm just feeling like I'm sick of the stone (which was an upgrade!) and want something less flashy. It just doesn't feel like me.

Any thoughts? Experiences?

Don’t do anything hasty. Can you post a photo of your ring? The reason why I say this is sometimes the setting can make a diamond look huge..High settings are notorious for that. Would you consider resetting your diamond into a low profile setting? A thin bezel that’s low set may be more comfortable. If the bezel is too large it can make it look much larger..but if it’s a thin bezel in a very low setting you may be more comfortable. Please post a photo of it on your hand.

 

[sugarcloud]

I have never owned a diamond that size (I wish lol!!) but I have had coloured stones which I have had the same feeling about. At first I wanted something big but later on it was just too much and felt almost "costumey". If I were you I would get myself a well made cz in the size you want and wear ii for a few days to see if you like the feeling of it. How much smaller are you wanting to go?

 

[realhauswife]

Don’t do anything hasty. Can you post a photo of your ring? The reason why I say this is sometimes the setting can make a diamond look huge..High settings are notorious for that. Would you consider resetting your diamond into a low profile setting? A thin bezel that’s low set may be more comfortable. If the bezel is too large it can make it look much larger..but if it’s a thin bezel in a very low setting you may be more comfortable. Please post a photo of it on your hand.

I'm definitely going to think on this for a while before I do anything! The height has always bothered me as well. Would a bezel hurt light performance?



So the setting has been part of my frustration. I had two local jewelers set this stone- the first was an absolute disaster. The second was not great and the stone was loose within a month. I then ended up having a custom setting made (which I had to send back and have re-made because it was completely wrong) by a highly recommended vendor and although it's objectively a fine setting, I've never been 100% happy with it mostly due to the height.

Like I said I will take plenty of time to really think about what I want to do but if I end up resetting it wouldn't be for a few years potentially. I really can't fathom spending more toward the setting at the moment when I feel it may be the size of the stone that's really bothering me. :/

 

[realhauswife]

I have never owned a diamond that size (I wish lol!!) but I have had coloured stones which I have had the same feeling about. At first I wanted something big but later on it was just too much and felt almost "costumey". If I were you I would get myself a well made cz in the size you want and wear ii for a few days to see if you like the feeling of it. How much smaller are you wanting to go?

That is a good idea to get a "tester" to wear for a bit. I would go down to 1.2ct range. It's the size my original stone was.

 

[AnastasiaBeaverhausen]

I also recommend getting some kinder tester/RHR/alt e-ring, before letting go of your 2ct. Smaller stones are easier to get than larger ones. I'd hate for you to change your mind and not be able to get your original stone back .

 

[Simple and Sparkly]

Adding a bezel can *increase* the size of your stone because of the added metal halo effect. I experienced that with my larger stone. But a semi-bezel might not add as much??

Have you thought of setting it E/W? That may make it look different to your eyes also. Or you could tension set it, which will sit extremely low.

I am one of those rare birds who went from a larger stone to a much smaller stone and it was the right thing for me! Feeling comfortable with the size of your stone is important. Go with your gut- you will know what is best for you And enjoy the sparkles in the journey!

 

[Austina]

FWIW, I think it looks absolutely perfect on your finger, not overwhelming, but totally in tune with your finger/hand size.

 

[MissGotRocks]

I honestly think it is the perfect size for your finger. Do you wear a band with it? Sometimes even a plain band can make the ring seem more grounded. I think it looks beautiful on your hand and I would think long and hard before I took a loss on such a gorgeous ring.
Looking at the side view, I could definitely see one more reset. I think it could be lower to the finger and a bit more substantial so it didn’t feel so high and ‘tottering’ on your finger.

 

[realhauswife]

I honestly think it is the perfect size for your finger. Do you wear a band with it? Sometimes even a plain band can make the ring seem more grounded. I think it looks beautiful on your hand and I would think long and hard before I took a loss on such a gorgeous ring.
Looking at the side view, I could definitely see one more reset. I think it could be lower to the finger and a bit more substantial so it didn’t feel so high and ‘tottering’ on your finger.

I do wear a plain gold band or a platinum eternity band with it and it does look a little more balanced but it still bothers me. I think you’re right maybe it’s the height and lack of “base” the ring has that’s bothering me.

How many resets is (are?) too many? ‍

 

[icy_jade]

The stone can be set lower and will be less intrusive and easier to wear. The size looks fine but height would be an issue for me too. For large stones I usually instruct for the stone to be set as low as possible.

 

[realhauswife]

The stone can be set lower and will be less intrusive and easier to wear. The size looks fine but height would be an issue for me too. For large stones I usually instruct for the stone to be set as low as possible.

Thanks that’s validating to hear- I’ve actually asked each jeweler to set it as low as possible and I’m so frustrated that it is always still high. I will not reset again unless I go with CAD or can have actual measurements beforehand.

 

[Mreader]

I’m

The stone can be set lower and will be less intrusive and easier to wear. The size looks fine but height would be an issue for me too. For large stones I usually instruct for the stone to be set as low as possible.

Agree w this! It looks a bit high. It doesn’t look too big at all! Especially an EC which has smaller face up then a round shape. If you reset be sure to come back and make a thread with pics of CADS to get PS input - it helps so much!

 

[TXwidow]

I would set it low, E-W rather than the current N-S and have a wider band. The thin, narrow band (to me) accents the size of the stone. Like a pebble sitting on a fat string.

 

[Cerulean]

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting a smaller stone. It does look set high. But if you’re not comfortable with it, you’re the one wearing it!

I had 2 carat MRB and I downsized to a 1.3 carat OEC. (From 8.1mm to 6.7mm, as my OEC is cut deep). My biggest issue with the 2 carat was how high it was - I too felt very aware of it and just couldn’t get used to it. I also burned money on resetting it. The other issue was the stone itself was poorer quality, which didn’t help.

I love my smaller OEC. I would’ve probably preferred the 7.1-7.5mm size range, but for the specs I was after with my budget, I got the best out there!

 

[icy_jade]

You can see a considerable gap. I think it can go down a few mm which will make a difference. Changing the setting does mean you may have to change the style of the ring so that the flow is better. If you had wanted this particular style (with the head like that) I can sort of understand why the jeweler said it can’t be lower.

 

[realhauswife]

You can see a considerable gap. I think it can go down a few mm which will make a difference. Changing the setting does mean you may have to change the style of the ring so that the flow is better. If you had wanted this particular style (with the head like that) I can sort of understand why the jeweler said it can’t be lower.

I was actually initially interested in an “invisible” gallery or something with a donut type base but they said this would be easier to set low. Either way, lesson learned! Thank you for taking the time to respond it is validating to hear this could be substantially lower in the right setting.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

First, I agree with others that the diamond looks nice on your hand and not huge at all. An emerald cut is more subtle than a brilliant cut stone, too. I think the setting is pretty, but that particular style isn't one that will be really low set. One day you could reset into a lower style setting if you wanted. I consider your ring medium-high, but not high. Since you don't want to reset now, just try to enjoy your beautiful ring! I will tell you that as you get older, you would probably really regret taking a loss on this diamond to get a smaller one. I am size sensitive to a degree, as well, but I have two diamond rings in the 2 ct range, and I am glad I have that size (but still wouldn't go larger).

Seeing your last post, I would disagree with the jeweler who told you that, because I think when the prongs are based on the top of the ring shank, it's going to be higher. Still, as I said, it's not TOO high at all. I've seen rings that are, and this one is just a little bit on the high side.

 

[caolsen]

You can see a considerable gap. I think it can go down a few mm which will make a difference. Changing the setting does mean you may have to change the style of the ring so that the flow is better. If you had wanted this particular style (with the head like that) I can sort of understand why the jeweler said it can’t be lower.

A trellis style could be set lower and still have the swoppy prong flow you may have liked. Also, a ring that’s styled a bit like Alex Park’s solitaire can let you set a stone quite low. I have a 3 carat Asscher that’s very low set that way.

Also, a prong head, where the setting is popping out of the band will always ad some height as opposed to a setting where the prongs flow out of the band. In the prong head case, thr setting is sitting on top of thr band as opposed to being part of, coming out of the band.

Here is an example of Alex’s setting where the prongs emerge from the band.

 

[caolsen]

Oh, and I think the stone looks lovely and is well portioned on your fingers. I *think* the pop rock style setting is what feels off to you.

 

[MissGotRocks]

I do wear a plain gold band or a platinum eternity band with it and it does look a little more balanced but it still bothers me. I think you’re right maybe it’s the height and lack of “base” the ring has that’s bothering me.

How many resets is (are?) too many? ‍

No such thing - just until you get it right. I could maybe consider David Klass who has lots of happy customers here on PS. You could contact him and talk with him about what you like and don't like with the diamond. He would do CADs that you could see before you commit to a project.

 

[Niel]

Yeah it’s set too high. And I agree turning it east west could possibly help, I did a photoshop for you.
I mean my head is spinning with the idea of it sideways with small tapered baguettes but really doesn’t matter what we like it’s your ring.
But diamonds aren’t getting cheaper. And this is a lovely stone.

 

[Bron357]

This is my EC. The centre is 4.20 but I’m a porky size 7.5.
I gave this setting alot of thought, it was my design.
It is as flat as I could get it, I’m a klutz. My wedding ring and eternity ring will fit in underneath (if that makes sense)
The ends are ever so slightly curved, to help it be closer to my finger.
Of course you need a ring you love and want to wear but don’t be too hasty in downsizing, you’ll lose money and later on your might regret it.
Definitely go for a lower setting.

 

[MMtwo]

I like the ring on your finger. Of course, you should be happy. Maybe a reset would work for you though. Still less money than you would lose if you sold it.

 

[MamaBee]

Your ring is beautiful and looks in proportion to the size of your hand. You are the the wearing it so you have to be happy. I think the fact that it’s a little high is making it look larger. I agree a bezel can make it look a bit larger but a very thin bezel not by much. If it’s set really low it would offset this IMHO. Ideally a prong set lower would make it appear smaller.

 

[lulu_ma]

I recently reset my emerald cut e-stone for the 2nd time. It's in a bezel now and I love it.

I tried on a bunch of different settings so I could get the reset just right. Frank Darling actually makes a ton of emerald cut settings (and bonus most of the czs are 2 cts). I found their Try-On program really useful. I didn't end up ordering a setting from them because none of the styles was perfect, but I highly recommend checking it out.

Here's a sampling of all the platinum/ white gold settings. I think you can try 3 sterling silver replicas at home. It's very easy and it's free.

https://frankdarling.com/try-at-home/

How do you feel about the weight of the ring. I did a metal switch from platinum to yellow gold and I find that I really like the lighter weight of the ring, too.

As others have said, proportionately the stone looks great on your finger. The right setting can make all the difference. And if you go with someone like David Klass, he can send you a wax for a test run.

 

[realhauswife]

Thank you everyone for your responses! I am going to call David Klass today.

 

[realhauswife]

Yeah it’s set too high. And I agree turning it east west could possibly help, I did a photoshop for you.
I mean my head is spinning with the idea of it sideways with small tapered baguettes but really doesn’t matter what we like it’s your ring.
But diamonds aren’t getting cheaper. And this is a lovely stone.

Thank you for taking the time to do that photoshop! I had never considered E/W before this thread and I actually really like the idea. Especially with a thicker band in a super lower setting.

Good point about diamond prices- I know you and everyone in this thread is right about that.

 

[MillieLou]

I had the same diamond size, shape, ring and finger size, and the same problem, as you.

I sold it and replaced with a modest, low-set 3-stone resetting of my grandmother's wedding ring.

I am much happier. My ring now suits me in all ways. It feels like me.

But I'm not you

 

[realhauswife]

I had the same diamond size, shape, ring and finger size, and the same problem, as you.

I sold it and replaced with a modest, low-set 3-stone resetting of my grandmother's wedding ring.

I am much happier. My ring now suits me in all ways. It feels like me.

But I'm not you

Oh, I remember your beautiful EC!! Was it painful to sell? What pushed you over the edge?

I personally am not as stressed about the loss as I see it as a sunken cost and I’m very hesitant to spend more money on yet another setting when it may be the size of the stone that is really bothering me. I’ve got a lot to think about.