Do You Feel Pressure to Wear Makeup?

[lyra]

I can honestly say I think this very thread made me feel pressured to put on makeup. But I say that jokingly! I always second guess myself. I knew I was going to a "nice" store today to buy a new winter coat. I did my makeup. I never do my makeup. But I had lingering doubts, and then I got self conscious. This is nothing new. Why do we sometimes feel we need to dress up and/or put on makeup just to shop at the mall? It's kind of funny. The clerks don't treat me better. They are always nice. Go figure.

 

[AprilBaby]

Actually I just want to ask, do you guys feel comfortable with makeup on? Like, physically. Because I physically feel uncomfortable with even the slightest smudge of pencil liner. It makes my eyelids feel really heavy and sleepy and I just don't feel good. What am I doing wrong? And even BB cream (which should be lighter than standard foundation) makes my skin feel choked and unhappy.

Do you have to get used to that feeling, or did you never feel it at all? Is it like smoking where you cough at first but then get used to it? I'm not using the cheap products either, so, idk why!

I'd actually love to master makeup because it seems fun and other people look great wearing it, but it feels and looks like crap on me.

I’m with you. I feel like I’m smothering when I wear foundation. I’ve tried almost everything. Just plain moisturizer feels fine but add any color to it and I’m dying.

 

[Calliecake]

@lyra , Do you think this has to do with what you grow up seeing your mom, grandma and aunts wear? My mom, grandma and aunts never left the house without wearing makeup. Wearing makeup just seems normal to me. All my nieces wear makeup and have always loved it too.

@chappy , My face feels the same if I have makeup on or not. I don’t even notice it when I’m wearing it.

 

[lyra]

No one in my family wore makeup except me, lol. Oh, the irony. I don't usually take care when I go out, except to make sure I'm wearing pants.

 

[MeowMeow]

@lyra , Do you think this has to do with what you grow up seeing your mom, grandma and aunts wear? My mom, grandma and aunts never left the house without wearing makeup. Wearing makeup just seems normal to me. All my nieces wear makeup and have always loved it too.

@chappy , My face feels the same if I have makeup on or not. I don’t even notice it when I’m wearing it.

You didn't ask me but I want to butt my nose in anyway. I think you might be partly right. I didn't grow up with a mom who wore much makeup. My grandmother wore some but mostly I saw her bare faced. She tried to get me to like it but it didn't really work. I actually didn't even like makeup until a few years ago.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I can't imagine feeling pressured to wear makeup. I am quite sure no one out there pays a bit of attention to what I wear or don't wear! But I wear makeup because it makes ME feel better about how I look. I try for a more natural look and not overdone.

I loved the Lisa Eldridge video. I've stayed out of the sun so I don't have the wrinkles that lady does, but I thought she looked fabulous with makeup! I think I am going to try some of the Burt's Bees tinted lipgloss after watching that!

 

[GliderPoss]

I wear makeup almost every day! I don't have to but I love enjoy the process and think I definitely look better with it. My mum also has always worn makeup daily, even as a SAHM with 4 kids. I work in a professional environment so it's just all part of getting ready for the day. I can do a full face in 5 mins flat so it's no hassle. I use quality products (mostly Tom Ford) and enjoy being creative by doing a different look each day. Minimum would be sunscreen, concealer, mascara & lip balm but usually I do full foundation, blush & eye shadow too. Not big on lipstick but I have a few I wear occasionally.

 

[SandyinAnaheim]

I've never felt pressured to wear makeup, and have always enjoyed creating different looks. It was forbidden for me to wear makeup as a teenager, which probably fueled my fascination with it. I've always worn makeup because I think my appearance is enhanced with it on. I think I am average in looks, but with makeup, I can enhance my better features and that makes me feel good.

My favorite has always been eyeshadow and its endless variations. Working in the legal field for most of my life, I got to wear makeup every day. I've never felt the need for foundation and don't like how it feels, I feel it when it's on and am afraid to get it on my clothes.

However, now I have my own business as a mobile dog groomer (best job ever), and can't really wear lip products or mascara as dog hair sticks to EVERYTHING. But I still wear eyeliner and Burt's Bee's lip balm because I feel more put-together than if I'm wearing nothing.

Bottom line, I wear makeup for me. I've learned how to enhance my features, and enjoy being able to do so. However, I see a lot of girls with pounds of makeup on and feel that even if they look good with it on, it still doesn't look good. Enhancing what is naturally there is one thing, and packing it on is another.

The other day I went to a hockey game and the girl in the row in front of us was rocking a ton of makeup and tarantula-like lashes, and I couldn't help but stare at those things stuck to her eyes. I'll bet she thought she looked good, but all I could think is that she looked ridiculous and had a special mirror at home.

 

[Jambalaya]

"Enhancing what is naturally there is one thing, and packing it on is another."

This.

 

[Phoenix]

I don't feel pressured by anyone or anything. I wear makeup because I want to, for me. Having said that, I don't wear heavy makeup. Most days these days, I go makeup-free in fact. But when I do go out, I put on foundation (not powder, can't stand that stuff), eyeshadow, blusher, highlighter and lipstick and I "finish" my brows (which are embroidered). I feel more polished and put-together.

@diamondseeker2006, I love Lisa Eldridge and have learned a lot from her videos. Like you, I also stay out of the sun. I go through occasional 'fads' and get a tan from time to time, but mostly I avoid the sun. I am blessed in that I have very few wrinkles (but I'd really rather have excellent health any time, but that is a different story altogether).

 

[Phoenix]

I count myself lucky that I have always lived in countries who don’t overly prioritize makeup: UK, Canada, Singapore. It’s easy to get judgy about makeup, especially if one wears goth makeup or drag inspired makeup. Living in Singapore, the culture still disapproves of wearing too much makeup and the natural look is heavily favored alongside Korean beauty trends. I don’t think I could pull off green or blue lipstick here except for Halloween.

It's interesting that you've perceived that. When I grew up in London, I felt ...not pressured...but maybe influenced by other people to pile on the makeup. I have to say in my teens and early 20's, which was the time I lived there, I wore the heaviest makeup. And then in SG, despite the heat and humidity, people really pile on the powder here (maybe in an effort to combat the oiliness that comes from the heat) and I really dislike that heavy-cakey look. I've never women in any other Asian countries that pile on the powder like the women here. Hong Kong women, on the other hand, are the most natural-looking, I feel.

 

[peacechick]

It's interesting that you've perceived that. When I grew up in London, I felt ...not pressured...but maybe influenced by other people to pile on the makeup. I have to say in my teens and early 20's, which was the time I lived there, I wore the heaviest makeup. And then in SG, despite the heat and humidity, people really pile on the powder here (maybe in an effort to combat the oiliness that comes from the heat) and I really dislike that heavy-cakey look. I've never women in any other Asian countries that pile on the powder like the women here. Hong Kong women, on the other hand, are the most natural-looking, I feel.

Oh yeah, I get you about the cakeiness. It’s definitely a South East Asian thing combined with less awareness about matching foundation/powder to skin tone. I imagine that people do get really dressed up in London, so that could be why. London is a centre of makeup innovation after all, looking at all the gurus that come from there like Pat McGrath, Lisa Eldridge and Wayne Goss.

Also it could be the groups we hung out with. Mine was mostly a mix of artsy-boho types, economists, teachers, engineer types— almost all of whom favoured very natural or no makeup, even for work. It’s possible that with a different crowd, the experience is entirely different. The women in my family wear very little makeup, my mum applies no skincare at all except for Oil of Olay at night and my aunts only on occasion. Strange how my sister and I turned out to be makeup-loving.

 

[Jambalaya]

Nobody I work with wears makeup at all, except the boss. They're all against it. They don't feel that it suits them, which is fine. So in that sense, I feel that I have to fit in by not wearing it - because I do feel they're a little negative and judgy about people who do wear lots of makeup - and I've realized that I haven't been using as much makeup as I like and that I've been influenced. So I'm going to try to get organized and wear the makeup I wanna wear! It's just hard when the people around you like the simple look/simple life. I was talking about getting a blowout and one or two of the women said they couldn't imagine paying someone just to blowdry their hair.

So yeah, personal adornment isn't really "in" where I work! But that's them, and I'm me. So I've picked out all the makeup I'm a gonna wear tomorrow! Foundation, highlighter, blush, eyebrow pencil, concealer, plain cream-colored eyeshadow, copper eyeshadow for my creases, dark burgundy eyeshadow to use as top eyeliner, mascara, and coral lipgloss.

I'm a gonna shock 'em!

I just feel like looking more glam right now and everybody should wear makeup or not as they please and not be judged for either choice, right?

 

[Missy]

everybody should wear makeup or not as they please and not be judged for either choice, right?

Yes exactly this. I find both groups (makeup free and pro makeup ) can be judgmental about the other. Haha I see it in this thread as unintentional as it may be (and as subtle as the undertones might be definitely judging going on here from both sides). Sometimes self awareness is challenging but it's always good because one cannot correct what one is not aware of...

IRL I am not judgmental about those who wear makeup just as I am not judgmental about those who wear no makeup. I vary between the 2 though definitely favor the makeup free group. As some others here have shared having super sensitive and hyper reactive skin and that is probably one big reason one would lean towards being in the makeup free group. One who is uncomfortable wearing makeup for such reasons might then naturally gravitate towards that as their preference without perhaps even realizing why one favors makeup free.

And I agree it depends on how you grew up too. My mom wears no makeup (though when she was younger she wore a little bit just to enhance her beauty because she was very beautiful) but my grandma always wore lipstick at least IIRC. My sister and I barely wear any makeup so I do think we are influenced that way as well.

And of course the media has an influence as does the culture around us and who one hangs out with as well. I have always favored artistic types of people who just don't wear makeup and in my neighborhood I have to say most people go natural re their face. Most women here don't wear much if any makeup at all. So yeah all subtle and not so subtle influences we may or may not be entirely aware of.

But yeah @Jambalaya wear what you enjoy and try not caring about what others around you might think...honestly I think generally most people don't really care or even notice us and what we are wearing or not wearing. At this stage in our life we sort of blend in more than stand out and that is A OK with me. Though I do admit I enjoy receiving compliments when I am out and about and I usually do because of what I am wearing clothing wise and yes I enjoy that. But I dress for myself just like one should wear or not wear makeup for themselves. And not to please (or displease as the case may be haha) anyone else.

Bottom line is if wearing makeup makes you feel good about yourself you should enjoy wearing it and if not wearing makeup is more comfortable for you and you feel good about yourself you shouldn't have to wear makeup. And no one should look down on the other for wearing it or not wearing it.

I'm a gonna shock 'em!

Go for it Jambalaya.

 

[MakingTheGrade]

Sadly I do think there is some data that says women who wear make up do better in terms of corporate success. Similar to tall men. That whole halo effect thing I imagine.

I work in medicine and while there isn’t an expectation that I wear make up, there is an unspoken expectation of how we look as “professionals”. I personally take issue with the unspoken code and style myself to be a bit subversive. I think it’s good for the patient population I work with to see that doctors, nurses, and scientists look all sorts of ways and are all sorts of people.

 

[Missy]

Sadly I do think there is some data that says women who wear make up do better in terms of corporate success. Similar to tall men. That whole halo effect thing I imagine.

I work in medicine and while there isn’t an expectation that I wear make up, there is an unspoken expectation of how we look as “professionals”. I personally take issue with the unspoken code and style myself to be a bit subversive. I think it’s good for the patient population I work with to see that doctors, nurses, and scientists look all sorts of ways and are all sorts of people.

Yes I think you are right in the corporate world. Studies have shown beautiful people can have an advantage. However one can always overcome that and be successful no matter what. In the end talent/skill/knowledge/intelligence outweighs the superficial.

I don't think I would have enjoyed being in Corporate America. I don't have the temperament for that world.

 

[MeowMeow]

Nobody I work with wears makeup at all, except the boss. They're all against it. They don't feel that it suits them, which is fine. So in that sense, I feel that I have to fit in by not wearing it - because I do feel they're a little negative and judgy about people who do wear lots of makeup - and I've realized that I haven't been using as much makeup as I like and that I've been influenced. So I'm going to try to get organized and wear the makeup I wanna wear! It's just hard when the people around you like the simple look/simple life. I was talking about getting a blowout and one or two of the women said they couldn't imagine paying someone just to blowdry their hair.

So yeah, personal adornment isn't really "in" where I work! But that's them, and I'm me. So I've picked out all the makeup I'm a gonna wear tomorrow! Foundation, highlighter, blush, eyebrow pencil, concealer, plain cream-colored eyeshadow, copper eyeshadow for my creases, dark burgundy eyeshadow to use as top eyeliner, mascara, and coral lipgloss.

I'm a gonna shock 'em!

I just feel like looking more glam right now and everybody should wear makeup or not as they please and not be judged for either choice, right?

Exactly! I think if you want to wear it that you should! Makeup is a fun thing! And so are blowouts lol. They probably spend their money on things you think are silly too and probably wouldn't like to be judged for that either

 

[chrono]

Bare faced, not even lip gloss. It's because it feels more natural that way to me. I can feel it if I apply anything. Much the same way I can feel it if my nails are painted. I don't have great skin or nice features but I feel that this is me, marks and all.

My mother will powder and kohl for functions and to work only.

1. Do you feel pressure to wear makeup? From whom, if so, and where -work/home/socially?
Sometimes, depending on the company, but I've been able to resist it.

2. Do you perceive any noticeable difference in the way people react to you or treat you when you wear makeup or go barefaced?
Can't answer this because I only wear makeup once or twice a year at best.

 

[vintageloves]

No, I've never felt pressured, but I've always been the kind of person who marched to my own drum beat. It breaks me out. All of it, every brand, apart from mascara and lip gloss which don't touch the skin. The expensive, natural stuff from Sephora breaks me out even worse. My skin wants to breathe. I'm glad I'm self-employed, because I know some professions require makeup as part of the "professional look" and I refuse to deal with chronic, totally avoidable acne to meet an outdated standard.

 

[GliderPoss]

Yes I think you are right in the corporate world. Studies have shown beautiful people can have an advantage. However one can always overcome that and be successful no matter what. In the end talent/skill/knowledge/intelligence outweighs the superficial.

I don't think I would have enjoyed being in Corporate America. I don't have the temperament for that world.

Sadly I have actually experienced this in the corporate world, days where I am very "made up" or extra polished I do feel I am treated differently and have overheard a few snide comments about those who "don't make an effort" etc... There is a standard to uphold (good hygiene!) but it shouldn't necessarily extend to wearing makeup.

 

[AV_]

Sometimes self awareness is challenging but it's always good

This thread sure did make me stare at the mirror! - thinking of war paint...

Conclusion: I sure don't have a makeup habit... Yet, the few times I do paint are memorable and very noticed: a little colour get people in my life talking of it out loud... which is rather nice & feels too easily earned! (putting up three pens & foundation & highlighter for the morning - because... nothing at all)

 

[Missy]

Sadly I have actually experienced this in the corporate world, days where I am very "made up" or extra polished I do feel I am treated differently and have overheard a few snide comments about those who "don't make an effort" etc... There is a standard to uphold (good hygiene!) but it shouldn't necessarily extend to wearing makeup.

That is very sad. And discriminatory and a clear double standard as men aren't forced to cover their dark under eye circles or wear blush to brighten their complexion or even have a flawless complexion.

There’s nothing sloppy or unpolished or unhygienic about an unmade-up face IMO. The fact that women are told they don't look polished when they don’t wear makeup shows how deeply so many of us have absorbed the idea that women should while men can simply splash some water on their faces and walk out the door.

I support one wanting to wear makeup because they want to wear it but it's not OK when one is forced to wear it. Yet another one of the exhausting requirements women face to be beautiful above all else. And it is a way of exerting control once again over women. Not OK.

 

[lyra]

You're absolutely right @missy, it's not fair and that's not right. It's just as ridiculous as saying women should wear skirts or dresses and high heels to look professional. Nope!

I find indulging in some simple skincare to be a nice self care and relaxing thing. For someone else, it may be putting on makeup, or wearing a certain perfume. It should never be something that a woman has to do. It should be something that is pleasurable at least. Otherwise, it just makes life a little less enjoyable IMO.

 

[MamaBee]

I do wear makeup...I had melanoma and I can’t wear sunscreen on my face. It makes my eyes and nose run..My dermatologist at the time told me to use foundation..that it’s formulated to not cause the same irritation..I need to protect my face as I do a lot of driving and get lots of sun on my face..I’m extremely fair...I wear a little blush and mascara..It’s very subtle..I don’t wear lipstick or eyeshadow...I dodged a bullet with having a level three Melanoma in 1990..I don’t want another one..so I’m very careful with the sun..

 

[Jambalaya]

Mamabean, I'm glad you dodged that bullet.

In a similar vein, rates of lip cancer are much lower in women than men because more of them wear lipstick. So that's a positive thing for lipstick-wearers. Some people feel that makeup suffocates their skin, but I feel that mine is protected when I do wear it. (My being glam lasted for one day - I was back to getting up too late to put it on today!)

 

[LLJsmom]

I don’t regularly wear make up and haven’t for my first 45 years of living. I would for weddings maybe. Im lazy. It takes an extra 15 minutes I could be sleeping.

No one pressures me but sometimes I feel like I should conform to society’s expectations that putting on make up is a way to show yourself to your best advantage, like brushing your teeth. But then again I think that if my natural face offends someone’s eyes, that’s not my problem. Yeah some days I have bags or maybe some pimples or whatever. But to me, that’s just being human. I don’t have a perfect complexion. Very few people do. I have lived my life and it shows and I don’t feel the need to hide it. Sometimes I wish my face was as clear as it was 15 years ago before I started running but the blemishes are a reflection of my experiences which I treasure. I agree that looking more polished and made up probably helps a person in their professional career, all other things being equal. But if putting on make up is the price of advancement, advancement isn’t worth it. Also, Part of me feels like if I put on make up, I’m not showing people the real me. Crazy huh?

On top of that I hate that make up clogs my pores and takes time to take off. I do care about having clean, unclogged and moisturized skin.

 

[Missy]

I do wear makeup...I had melanoma and I can’t wear sunscreen on my face. It makes my eyes and nose run..My dermatologist at the time told me to use foundation..that it’s formulated to not cause the same irritation..I need to protect my face as I do a lot of driving and get lots of sun on my face..I’m extremely fair...I wear a little blush and mascara..It’s very subtle..I don’t wear lipstick or eyeshadow...I dodged a bullet with having a level three Melanoma in 1990..I don’t want another one..so I’m very careful with the sun..

@Mamabean as an aside have you ever tried a "physical" sunscreen on your face ie one that contains zinc oxide and/or titanium dioxide. They are generally very good for sensitive skin and are the only type of sunscreen I can wear. I don't have to tell you that one cannot fool around with melanoma and thank goodness you are doing so well since your level 3 diagnosis in 1990. My dh had surgery for that in 2011 and yes one cannot be too careful with the sun with such a history. I am not sure foundation is as protective as a separate physical sunscreen so just throwing that out there. I love Cotz sensitive face sunscreen and it disappears into your face (non tinted version) or you can buy a tinted version that might act as foundation for you too...just thinking out loud here.

Anyway melanoma is scary and I am so glad you are A OK!!!! ((((Hugs)))).

 

[MamaBee]

@Mamabean as an aside have you ever tried a "physical" sunscreen on your face ie one that contains zinc oxide and/or titanium dioxide. They are generally very good for sensitive skin and are the only type of sunscreen I can wear. I don't have to tell you that one cannot fool around with melanoma and thank goodness you are doing so well since your level 3 diagnosis in 1990. My dh had surgery for that in 2011 and yes one cannot be too careful with the sun with such a history. I am not sure foundation is as protective as a separate physical sunscreen so just throwing that out there. I love Cotz sensitive face sunscreen and it disappears into your face (non tinted version) or you can buy a tinted version that might act as foundation for you too...just thinking out loud here.

Anyway melanoma is scary and I am so glad you are A OK!!!! ((((Hugs)))).

Thank you! I’ll check it out! (((Hugs back at ya!)

 

[Babyblue033]

I rarely wear makeup and never felt pressure to wear it, ironic since I've worked for a major cosmetics company for over a decade. Lots of young, beautiful, fashionable men and women to be around But I recently changed a role within the same company and for the first time I do feel some pressure to "keep up the apperance" a bit. Hard to explain but there's more competitiveness with colleagues and worries about "perceptions" from upper management.

But I just can't manage a full on makeup, I don't even know how to put it on properly since I spent my entire adult life bare faced. So best I can manage is some BB cream, eye shadow, and lipstick. Probably isn't even worth the trouble

 

[chrono]

Although I don't wear makeup, I make sure to wear sunscreen every time I leave the house and reapply every 2 hours of sun exposure, even if it's rainy or cloudy.