Could you still be happy?

[Allison D.]

To me, living paycheck to paycheck isn't the same as living without luxuries.

When I think about living paycheck to paycheck, it doesn't just mean living without luxuries. It means barely having enough $$ to cover basics (rent, food, clothing, etc.) and having to worry all the time about what will happen if something unforeseen happens (i.e. car breaks down, fails inspection and needs $700 worth of new tires, etc. etc.). I lived that way for several years until I secured a job that paid enough to actually save money. Maintaining that cushion now is my absolute top priority because I'd do nearly anything not to return to living with the worry/stress that comes paycheck to paycheck.

Could I live without luxuries? You bet.....easily. I've often commented that I'd give up every piece of jewelry I own if it meant I could get just 10 more years with my already 10-year old dog. I readily lend my jewelry because they are just things to me; I enjoy them, but I could sooooo easily live without them.

It's even hard for me to come up with things I'd like for my b-day/anniversary, because I really don't care much about things. Given the choice, I'd rather spend discretional $$ on experiences with friends/family instead of things.

Hub and I don't have kids, so my plan in our advanced ages is to trim down to the absolute minimum. I don't want a lot of things that someone else will have to dispose of.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

My thought was exactly what Allison posted: that living paycheck to paycheck isn't the same as living without luxuries.

For me the security of having a healthy emergency fund is more valuable than any luxury item (as several other posters have said)

I've lived paycheck to paycheck many times in my life, but I've had at least a little in savings since I was 16 (and started working). So while I have been in school debt and have lived on rice and beans, I've never not had a dime to my name, if that makes sense.

I also genuinely don't feel a need to acquire stuff or have luxury goods. Our primary car has 200,000 miles on it and I paid cash for it when I was college. It gets great gas mileage, it's dependable and the insurance is cheap, so I'm completely content with it. We don't drive it becaue we have to, but by not putting a dent in our savings account by buying a new vehicle, I feel more secure.

So ultimately I would be just as happy without any luxury goods, but not having money in the bank would cause serious stress.

 

[somethingshiny]

I agree with Allison's definition of paycheck to paycheck.


I think that an emergency fund is a luxury. That's one thing I'd really like to have.

 

[rosetta]

My parents must have lived hand to mouth for a while.

But somehow they never let us feel it.

We thought that sleeping all five of us on mattresses on the floor of a clapboard house was just all good fun.

It didn't occur to the 8 year old me that it was so we could have on heating costs and couldn't afford to buy beds!

Now my parents live in luxury, and they deserve every ounce of it.

 

[Gypsy]

It's stressful, always wondering if something unexpected is going to throw you in debt. Can I do it? Yes, with my husband and my cats I could. But nothing beats having a cushion for lives unexpected down turns.

 

[Sha]

We're living paycheck to paycheck right now, since DH is just starting a new business and we're surviving mostly on my income. If I think about it, I'm definitely happy right now - I guess the things that make me the most happy (family, nature etc), I'm still able to enjoy, even without a lot of money. The money situation does make me a bit anxious at times, though. Thankfully we've gotten by ok so far, but if we did have a emergency or something like that, I'm not sure what' we'd do - we don't really have any savings. Also, sometimes I look at my old clothes and shoes and feel really shabby. I try to look presentable, of course, but I wish I was able to afford some new things. I haven't done any shopping for a while. It would also be nice to be able to go into a store and buy something spontaneously...whether it's a yummy treat or jewellery or a bag, without thinking about the budget. I would also like be able to take a vacation at some point! But other than those desires, I'm still happy, and I still feel blessed. For that, I'm thankful.

 

[TooPatient]

No.

There are moments of happiness, but the stress of what-if is always in my mind so I never really manage to relax.

We are living paycheck to paycheck. Every two weeks we buy the cat/dog food & chewie sticks (plus needed supplies for them) to last until the next pay-day. Mortgage gets paid on the 15th each month (2 weeks after due date and just 1 day before getting a fee). From there, priority goes to any service that is about to be shut off (came within 1 day of losing water last month ). In a good month, we're able to pay the past-due amounts and the current amount on all of the "must-haves". The grocery budget is whatever is left.

There is no savings. We have only one credit card ($2,000 limit) for emergencies and it is at it's limit after the stuff we've faced the last couple of years. I'm listing anything "extra" on CL but so far haven't had any luck.

We've got a big project sitting in our garage only because of an insurance settlement (and the fact that we had no choice but to pay to move it) and we aren't able to make any progress on it. If there was a chance to sell it and catch up on the other stuff, I know FI would list it in a heartbeat.


It isn't the lack of "stuff" that bothers me about this. I'm quite content with what we have (although some decent work/school clothes would be nice)... obviously I'd LOVE to have a nice wedding (still hoping to manage that some day) and pretty diamonds BUT I don't need them and could be happy without.
What bothers me is the stress that comes with it -- What if one of the animals has to go to the vet? What if the refrigerator dies? (we just had this repaired last month) What if our one and only car dies?


Even with this, I know I'm lucky. Things are getting better. We do have a warm house to be in, electricity/gas to run stuff, and enough food to eat.

I grew up with a lot less. I know what it is like to live in a van. I know what it is like to go to bed without eating. I know what it is like when even scraping up a few dollars for some thrift-shop clothes is a treat.


While you CAN live this way and the important thing is that you have your family and your health (and your family has their health!), I can say that it is MISERABLE.

 

[yssie]

My parents must have lived hand to mouth for a while.

But somehow they never let us feel it.

We thought that sleeping all five of us on mattresses on the floor of a clapboard house was just all good fun.

It didn't occur to the 8 year old me that it was so we could have on heating costs and couldn't afford to buy beds!

Now my parents live in luxury, and they deserve every ounce of it.

That, rosetta. Every word.

My parents grew up with just a tiny bit of little in the way of luxury - they've earned every bit of what they have now. I don't know what it's like to truly go without, and I'm so grateful for that. I couldn't be at all happy without definitively knowing that come what may, we have enough squirreled away to screen our own children from such eventualities as my parents did for me.

And... I love to travel - and travel doesn't come cheap, even if one doesn't book the honeymoon package!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Allison, I agree and you said it better than I did!

 

[zoebartlett]

That said, could I be happy living paycheck to paycheck? Probably not, as financial security (i.e. a decent savings/investment acct.) is important to my sense of well being. My definition of "paycheck to paycheck" is barely being able to pay all of your bills, not being able to pay your bills and still have $$ to eat in restaurants and buy jewelry for birthdays/anniversaries. I suspect that if you asked 10 people on PS what their definition of "paycheck to paycheck" was, you'd get 12 different answers, so we may all be coming from different perspectives on this question.

Good point, Yenny (What does that mean, anyway? ) Paycheck to paycheck probably does mean very different things to everyone. I take it to mean that one is barely able to pay bills and is basically having a hard time making ends meet in general. I might also consider it to mean that someone has enough to pay for necessities but does not have anything left over for savings.

If we were living paycheck to paycheck, we'd make it work, but I'm not sure that "happy" is the first word that would come to mind. Yes, health and having loved ones around does help, but I'd be very stressed all the time.

SS and Haven -- I like the comment about how living without [stuff] is easier than living with worry (or it was something to that effect anyway ). I totally agree.

 

[HollyS]

"If you woke up tomorrow living paycheck to paycheck could you still be happy? Knowing you'd have to give up a fancy car, excessive jewels, manis/pedis, salon services, big homes, expensive hobbies, could you do it? Basically, how much does stuff really mean to you?"


I don't have a fancy car. In fact, my car is a company demo. Not. Luxurious.

My left ring finger might have a five figure price tag, but the rest of me is naked of expensive baubles.

My home is less than 2000 sq. ft., moderately priced for our area, and is no one's idea of impressive. Just comfortably cozy.

I haven't had a professional hairdresser touch my tresses in years. I cut. I color. Every hairdresser I know has terrible hair. Bad advertising in my opinion.

I used to get pedicures. Then I saw (online) exactly how many cases of MRSA and other infections are transmitted by the whirlpool foot baths. And I sure did like those footbaths. Darn it.


Could I be happy living paycheck to paycheck? Happy, yes. Content, no. I need financial security, even if I don't need wealth to flaunt. I'm perfectly willing to do without the pricey palace, jalopy, hobby, and personal frou-frou. I AM doing without. And it's no hardship.

 

[DivaDiamond007]

My definition of living paycheck to paycheck is that one is struggling to pay for necessities - modest housing, food, utilities and clothing. To me having an emergency fund and no consumer debt is a luxury.

I wish I knew what it is like to not have to worry about money.

 

[monarch64]

My definition of living paycheck to paycheck is that one is struggling to pay for necessities - modest housing, food, utilities and clothing. To me having an emergency fund and no consumer debt is a luxury.

I wish I knew what it is like to not have to worry about money.

DivaDiamond007--I don't know anyone who doesn't worry about money to some extent....it seems to me that whether you're rich or poor or in between, you worry about money.

I think the concept of happiness, or "having enough" or not living "paycheck-to-paycheck" is about being able to wake up every day and be able to put aside that worry/frustration, and go out and live your life and appreciate what you actually have that very day. Happiness, to me, means being able to cope with everyday life, being able to appreciate on a consistent basis your family and friends and belongings, and not worry at all if only for a few hours at a time, whether you've put in enough hours, or saved enough that month, or have great hair, or whatever thing it is that ails you!

 

[bee*]

When DH lost his job we were definitely living paycheck to paycheck for a few months seeing as I'm a student and so am only working part-time. I hated it-I was still happy day to day but the stress that comes with making sure bills are paid is huge. Once I qualify, I am definitely going to make sure that I have a cushion behind me for the unexpected. I can live without fancy things once I have DH and my family and furbabies.

 

[partgypsy]

"If you woke up tomorrow living paycheck to paycheck could you still be happy? Knowing you'd have to give up a fancy car, excessive jewels, manis/pedis, salon services, big homes, expensive hobbies, could you do it? Basically, how much does stuff really mean to you?"

I don't live paycheck to paycheck, but then again I also don't have a: fancy car, excessive jewels (well this is arguable) pay for manis/pedis or salon services, don't have a big home, or expensive hobbies (other than see: excessive jewels). Other than a couple ebay purchases really haven't bought jewelry/gems the last 2, 3 years.

Last year when I went on vacation I hid my jewelry box, and for a month afterwards never got around to taking it back out. Other than a handful of pieces I realize I don't miss them.

There were times growing up my family had money, but all the time I've been on my own, I was entirely responsible for myself and had little. I didn't feel poor though, I was proud I was self-reliant. And the older I get, the more acutely I feel how fast my children are growing up, and my parents are getting older and getting towards the ends of their lives. Spending time with my family is more important than things.
But I would worry about living paycheck to paycheck, because of being responsible for two children and their quality of life, handling unexpected expenses like medical emergencies or house repairs, having money to replace our vehicle, college tuitions and such.

 

[Black Jade]

My definition of living paycheck to paycheck is that one is struggling to pay for necessities - modest housing, food, utilities and clothing. To me having an emergency fund and no consumer debt is a luxury.

I wish I knew what it is like to not have to worry about money.

DivaDiamond007--I don't know anyone who doesn't worry about money to some extent....it seems to me that whether you're rich or poor or in between, you worry about money.

I think the concept of happiness, or "having enough" or not living "paycheck-to-paycheck" is about being able to wake up every day and be able to put aside that worry/frustration, and go out and live your life and appreciate what you actually have that very day. Happiness, to me, means being able to cope with everyday life, being able to appreciate on a consistent basis your family and friends and belongings, and not worry at all if only for a few hours at a time, whether you've put in enough hours, or saved enough that month, or have great hair, or whatever thing it is that ails you!

I do not worry about money. Ever.
I've been poor and I've been comfortable and it was all just fine. If I were poor again (which could happen, especially in this current economy) I believe that God would meet my needs. As long I have ANY money, I know that it's part of my job to pray and ask God what to do with it, because its His, not mine. It is interesting that God always points out others who have needs to me and shows ways to help them. I think this gets rid of the fear of not having, myself. Because too many times I have found that God directed me to give money (or to give something else) to someone and it turned out they needed it just at that moment. So I believe that He would do the same for me should it happen that we suddenly lost everything (which could happen).

I have many interesting stories to tell in this regard. This is a recent one. My brother, who has struggled with being dependent on my mother for years has done a lot of growing up recently and he decided to start a business, using skills he has which are very marketable. I believe he will do well (but that's in God's hands). Anyway, I did not know all of this. It came to me really strongly one day that I was supposed to send my brother a certain sum of money. the amount that came to my mind was a little under what I had immediately available in my checkbook. I kept arguing with myself, thinking that the amount I had in my checkbook would be fine, but a little voice kept telling me it would NOT, and that I had to transfer money immediately and mail my brother this check. So I did it. Then lo and behold, the next week he telephones me. he needed this very exact sum of money to do the last thing he needed to qualify to start this business to the penny. It had arrived at exactly the right time, when he was stumped as to how to get it and at the end of his rope and had been praying about it. So his faith was strengthened and I had my faith strenghtened too.

One time could be a coincidence--but this has happened many times. Last year, it came to me that I was supposed to send a certain sum to a lady I only know slightly. I didn't know why. I thought she might be very offended (I always think people don't like you to send them charity). I send the sum. She called me up crying with gratitude and shock. She had had no idea how to get her son a winter coat and the exact sum of money had arrived in the mail. Once I suddenly knew that I had to give away a pair of expensive aquamarine earrings to certain young girl I knew. I didn't quite want to give them away--they were something I had saved for for a long time, even though I rarely wore them. Later the girl's mother told me that her daughter had been struggling about their poverty (they are large family with many children and although they have all the necessities, they rarely have luxuries) and crying because she never got pretty things, nice jewelry like the other girls she knows. Her mother told her that God could give her jewelry if He wanted to and felt it was good for her, whether they had money or not. The girl (she was about sixteen) didn't believe this and expressed this strongly. the very next day the earrings came out of nowhere, for no reason. Again, both our faith was strengthened (and I have never missed the earrings).

I could go on and on and on. Last year, I heard about a situation where children were cold and had no hats or gloves and no money to get them. I was in a goodwill store and I saw a bag of yarn. I felt that God wanted me to buy the yarn and start to knit hats. But I also felt this was ridiculous. they were a large number of kids and how could I knit enough hats? I asked if people would in my church would like to help. Disbelief was expressed--people kept talking about 'a drop in the bucket' and so forth. Others volunteered to knit but mostly the people that volunteered wanted knitting lessons. there I was with a little bit of yarn, people who didn't know how to knit and time was passing and winter was coming. We decided to just do what we could. We had a couple of knitting classes and just expected to get a few hats, maybe 10 or 20 and decided that it would be better to put hats on 20 kids than on none. The deadline day came. I came in with my few hats. And it was like the loaves and the fishes. Hats just kept coming out of nowhere. Bags and bags of them. People who had just learned to knit made very nice hats, they had spread word of mouth and had their relatives knit, people donated yarn from all over, it was amazing. We were just flooded with hats, which went to their destination and were used last winter and people still keep knitting hats and yarn keeps appearing, which I guess is for NEXT winter.

So if I had to live paycheck to paycheck, I believe I would see how God can provide, because I have seen too much of this to doubt it.

 

[Dancing Fire]

[quote="Black Jade|1303526726|

So if I had to live paycheck to paycheck, I believe I would see how God can provide, because I have seen too much of this to doubt it.

our money say...'IN GOD WE TRUST"..

 

[suchende]

I grew up quite comfortably and have had good fortune generally. My answer to this question would be too speculative and romanticized. I hope I would still be the happy person I am now.