Can a diamond be too big???

[mypak]

Some may view as a "dumb" question....but looking at a 2.0 ct for my girlfriend''s e-ring...she''s very petite, about 5''2", 110 lbs and a size 4 ring.....

well obviously to her, it''s the right size...to me, I just don''t want it too look too gaudy/showy b/c that''s just kind of how I am...

Just wondering what your opinions are here...is there such a thing? not even sure why it''s on my mind.....I personally just don''t wanna be too showy, etc.

 

[Bunnifer]

Date: 10/11/2006 2:20:43 PM
Author:mypak
Some may view as a ''dumb'' question....but looking at a 2.0 ct for my girlfriend''s e-ring...she''s very petite, about 5''2'', 110 lbs and a size 4 ring.....


well obviously to her, it''s the right size...to me, I just don''t want it too look too gaudy/showy b/c that''s just kind of how I am...


Just wondering what your opinions are here...is there such a thing? not even sure why it''s on my mind.....I personally just don''t wanna be too showy, etc.

No, this is not a dumb question! I just had this conversation with a coworker this morning. I think 2 carats is not too gaudy or showy, even on a petite hand (I am a size 4.75) if set in a tasteful setting. It may seem like "a boulder" of a rock now but 10 years from now, you might think it''s just right (or maybe not big enough!)

.

Plus, SHE is going to be wearing the ring. If it seems OK to her, that''s all that should really matter.

 

[belle]

your priorities should be
1. what you can afford
2. what your gf wants

if that happens to be 2cts, then so be it.

 

[mia15]

Hi,

Well, there''s no wrong or right answer. Personally, I think diamond size depends more on the hand. Some hands, no matter what ring size, can carry it off and some look a little overwhelmed. At 2 carats it''s not too much of an issue, IMO, especially if that''s what she likes.
Also, people worry about flashiness, but to me, flashiness comes from the attitude of the general person, more how she/he wears something and less what that thing is. Anyway, that''s all subjective--what''s important is that she gets a ring that''s closest to the ring of her dreams.

Good luck!

 

[Oleander]

Date: 10/11/2006 2:20:43 PM
Author:mypak
Some may view as a 'dumb' question....but looking at a 2.0 ct for my girlfriend's e-ring...she's very petite, about 5'2', 110 lbs and a size 4 ring.....


well obviously to her, it's the right size...to me, I just don't want it too look too gaudy/showy b/c that's just kind of how I am...


Just wondering what your opinions are here...is there such a thing? not even sure why it's on my mind.....I personally just don't wanna be too showy, etc.

My feelings on carat weight are in the minority here, as I don't think bigger is always better. I absolutely think there can be such a thing as a "too big" diamond. But it's not a simple equation of a+b=too big. It can be any combination of physical stature, lifestyle, world view, confidence, taste, neighborhood, culture, job type, personality (modest or not), peer pressure, fashion style, etc. Some people like showy, some are modest and embarrassed by wealth.

Only you know those characteristics about your intended. How does your GF live the rest of her life? Is she into jewels? If she says 2 carats is good for her, then likely it is. I think there also needs to be a compromise as to what you are both comfortable seeing on her hand. I know my husband would be mortified to see anything much bigger than 1.25 on my hand and would refuse to finance such a bauble, and luckily, I agree, so we are well matched as spouses. It's fine for others, but it's not the image we want to convey about ourselves (due to job).

I personally know of two women who never wear their rings because they are too big: both feel the 2 carat stone they received is inappropriate for their social circle, job choice, and personal style and taste--now they just wear plain gold bands. Their husbands just wanted to please them, and thought "big" was the answer for them. It wasn't.

But for some, it is, because I also know women who have 4 carats and it isn't enough. You just have to judge your situation. There's no cut off point that's right for every person, and it's unpredictable. Some people you would think would sport a big rock like a minimalist look, and others who you think can't afford shoes will have a big stone.

I choose most items by evaluating: proportion, appropriateness, comfort, scale, esthetics, design, and how it works with other items I own or how it fits in to my lifestyle/world view; this applies to jewelry, clothing, furniture, lighting, etc.

If you MAKE me put a number on it, I would say that 1 carat is a low-risk size to buy. Most women will be fine with that. Bigger, and I think you are making a higher risk. Lower, and you are making a higher risk. But I don't like putting a number on it because you have to judge your GF yourself. Also, my background is upper-middle class urban, so take that into account.

Best to you in your seach.

 

[Mara]

the most important part of your post for me is where you said 'well obviously to her, it's the right size'....if that is what she wants and you want to give her what she wants, then give her the 2c and make her happy up front. diamond shrinkage sets in fast! soon it will look just like a 1.5c.

 

[codex57]

Usually not. My wife isn''t very showy, and I ended up buying a much bigger ring than I originally intended. At first, she was embarassed by the attention. Eventually, she liked the compliments. It''s certainly better than the other way around.

I would worry more about what you can afford and what she wants tho. A 1.5 is still gonna look pretty huge on her. What of the 4 C''s are you sacrificing to get to that 2.0 carat size? If the budget can take it right now, I''d drop the size to up the Cut and Color. Get into the VS2 range if you were previously in the SI2 or SI1 range.

 

[Julian]

You're asking PSers if a 2c is too big?

Just kidding! I agree with others. If she wants a 2c, then I think that's the answer (assuming finances aren't a problem). There are many tiny women like your gf on PS - I'm 5'4" and 110. And I don't think 2c is too showy, depending on where you live. It's a very nice size and just think: she will may never yearn for something bigger! She should be comfortable in any situation wearing jeans or a suit with her pet rock.

Believe me, after a while... you can get used to anything.

In guy terms, remember getting that huge plasma TV? Seemed enormous, right? But now, I'll bet it's "normal" sized and other TVs look kind of small to you. Same thing for diamonds! And we look at them every day, several times a day!

ETA: Plasma TV Shrinkage Syndrome! PSS!

 

[mypak]

Wow, thanks for all the replies...yes, at the end of the day if she likes it (and she does love it), that''s really the only thing that matters.....we saw the custom setting last week and they put a 2ct diamond on there just to see what it''d look like and her hand was shaking....

I guess I wanted to see what the general consensus was out there...didn''t want to ask any female co-workers and tip my hand that a proposal was in the near future...

I was thinking 2.0 ct, Ideal cut, E, VS2....sounds like around $30K +/-

 

[mypak]

Date: 10/11/2006 2:42:15 PM
Author: Mara
the most important part of your post for me is where you said ''well obviously to her, it''s the right size''....if that is what she wants and you want to give her what she wants, then give her the 2c and make her happy up front. diamond shrinkage sets in fast! soon it will look just like a 1.5c.

good point, I guess I needed to hear it from someone other than her!

 

[mypak]

Date: 10/11/2006 2:43:16 PM
Author: codex57
Usually not. My wife isn''t very showy, and I ended up buying a much bigger ring than I originally intended. At first, she was embarassed by the attention. Eventually, she liked the compliments. It''s certainly better than the other way around.

I would worry more about what you can afford and what she wants tho. A 1.5 is still gonna look pretty huge on her. What of the 4 C''s are you sacrificing to get to that 2.0 carat size? If the budget can take it right now, I''d drop the size to up the Cut and Color. Get into the VS2 range if you were previously in the SI2 or SI1 range.

I was kind of thinking that last night too....better to get what she wants regardless if I think is too big, etc. than something I''m comfy with (at the moment) and wish I could''ve gotten the 2.0 in retrospect...make her happy up front

 

[Miranda]

If she likes that size, get it! I''m just a touch smaller than your girlfriend and I think 2 ct. is the perfect size for me. It is substantial without being gaudy IMO. I have a 1.2 oval in a halo right now and I think the center stone is too small. How are you going to set it??? That can make the difference between understated and showy...Not that there''s anything wrong with showy!!!

 

[canuk-gal]

Date: 10/11/2006 2:29:11 PM
Author: belle
your priorities should be
1. what you can afford
2. what your gf wants

if that happens to be 2cts, then so be it.

Well said.

cheers--Sharon

 

[kcoursolle]

If she wants a 2 carat and you can afford it, I''m not going to talk you out of it.

by the way, you can go down quite a bit in color and clarity and save a bundle, but don''t sacrifice on cut quality. Cut really determines the sparkle of a diamond more than any other quality.

 

[kenny]

I think a diamond (of any size) can be too big, depending on the person.

If she is not comfortable wearing it, or you are uncomfortable with the impression you feel it makes (or for security reasons), then it is too big.

You should buy what makes you both happy.

BTW, if you have the budget and don't want a large diamond go up in clarity and color or consider a blue or pink diamond.

 

[mypak]

Date: 10/11/2006 4:26:45 PM
Author: Miranda
If she likes that size, get it! I''m just a touch smaller than your girlfriend and I think 2 ct. is the perfect size for me. It is substantial without being gaudy IMO. I have a 1.2 oval in a halo right now and I think the center stone is too small. How are you going to set it??? That can make the difference between understated and showy...Not that there''s anything wrong with showy!!!

I hope I describe it correctly but it''s like a bezel setting....it is round and has diamods on the round part on the top....also the band is pave half-way around....given this type of setting, I think it should look even bigger than a 2 which is why my male mind rationalized that a smaller one would suffice but I was "shot down"....

 

[mypak]

Date: 10/11/2006 4:49:33 PM
Author: kenny
I think a diamond (of any size) can be too big, depending on the person.

If she is not comfortable wearing it, or you are uncomfortable with the impression you feel it makes (or for security reasons), then it is too big.

You should buy what makes you both happy.

BTW, if you have the budget and don''t want a large diamond go up in clarity and color or consider a blue or pink diamond.

not a security reason for me...more a thing like I don''t want people thinking I went too overboard, etc....it''s within my budget but I guess it feels weird buying something that expensive when I could maybe use the money for something else...but this is a once in a lifetime purchase and it is the right girl I''ve been waiting for

 

[Kaleigh]

Sounds like a halo setting??

 

[Lynn B]

Date: 10/11/2006 5:22:50 PM
Author: mypak

I hope I describe it correctly but it's like a bezel setting....it is round and has diamods on the round part on the top....also the band is pave half-way around....given this type of setting, I think it should look even bigger than a 2 which is why my male mind rationalized that a smaller one would suffice but I was 'shot down'....

LOL! You are such a BOY! That's called a "halo" setting!

(ETA: Kaleigh and I were posting at the same time!)

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 10/11/2006 5:33:57 PM
Author: Lynn B

Date: 10/11/2006 5:22:50 PM
Author: mypak

I hope I describe it correctly but it''s like a bezel setting....it is round and has diamods on the round part on the top....also the band is pave half-way around....given this type of setting, I think it should look even bigger than a 2 which is why my male mind rationalized that a smaller one would suffice but I was ''shot down''....

LOL! You are such a BOY! That''s called a ''halo'' setting!

(ETA: Kaleigh and I were posting at the same time!)

Great minds......

 

[Ellen]

You could save some money by going down to F.

 

[mia15]

I forgot to congratulate you, Mypak!

 

[susi]

I think you've been given great answers.....and of course, now, it's up to you and your Lady.

Maybe from a perspective of one of the older PS members......I used to think a large stone would be the end all of my diamond searching.....and, certainly, 3 carats is NOT huge, by any means, especially here on PS but it does make a nice looking ring.

I wore my 3ct+ stone on and off for awhile and finally concluded that it is not my favorite weight/size stone. So, to me, personally, a diamond can be too big.

I prefer a smaller size/weight. Fortunately, for me, I have more diamonds, in smaller ct weights to wear and so everything works out nicely.

Tastes, desires can change over the years.....but you're living now....she wants a 2 carat now.....so go for it, would be my adivce. She may love this size and this stone forever....or she may change and want something else later.

Be prepared for anything....

as we Ladies can and do, sometimes, change our minds.

 

[FireGoddess]

Maybe you should look for something in the 1.9 range. You avoid the sticker shock of jumping up to/over 2 cts, and it looks just like a 2 ct on her hand. If money isn''t an issue, than just go with what she wants. She came up with the number somehow, probably from seeing a stone that size on her hand.

 

[KristyDarling]

If she shot down the smaller-diamond-with-halo idea, then I would definitely avoid it. 2 carats on someone your GF''s size would be beautiful. You say that you can afford the ring -- that is KEY. Do the other couples in your social circles have e-rings smaller than 2 carats, or more? If you''re the first to go that big, then of course you''ll feel a bit bashful about it at first. But just remember that your GF''s happiness with the ring is the most important thing. (no one else is going to be wearing it but her) It may seem ridiculous to you at this point to sink that much money into a gemstone, but believe you me, after it''s done and the ring is on her finger, everything will become clear and you''ll be so glad you listened to her preferences.

Oh, and if you get snarky comments, you could just say light-heartedly, "I did a lot of homework and I had no idea that a guy like me could afford a ring like this!" Or you could grin and make a joke out of it, "You''d be amazed at how much high quality CZs cost these days!" If you don''t ACT weird about it, then other people won''t THINK weird about it!!!

 

[KristyDarling]

A 1.9 c stone would be an awesome buy (kinda hard to find though). Is your GF color sensitive? If she is only slightly color sensitive, G to H color is a total sweet spot for value and size. It''s very hard to detect warmth in a G and you''ll be able to get a bigger stone. And, finding an eye-clean SI1 would also offer you more bang for the buck. Just make sure your cut proportions are excellent and that rock will sparkle like the dickens.

If you like, give us a rough budget and some basic spec ranges and we can help you find a great rock!

 

[Mara]

OH you are getting a halo setting, well for me that could change things. Basically a halo''d 2c looks more like a 3c. Which could be borderline on a small hand esp with the halo effect. My two cents is I don''t like large stones halo''d, they look like cocktail rings to me. If I was to halo a ring I''d probably do a 1.25c or similar...I have worn a halo 1c and loved it. I know that halo is a great way to give a smaller stone some oomph but I just don''t love the idea of a 2c in a halo. Maybe a SUPER THIN halo. Anyway...for me the 2c in a halo changes things BUT it''s still back to what SHE wants. If she loves the idea of a 2c in a halo, what can you really do??

 

[Miranda]

Date: 10/11/2006 5:22:50 PM
Author: mypak

Date: 10/11/2006 4:26:45 PM
Author: Miranda
If she likes that size, get it! I''m just a touch smaller than your girlfriend and I think 2 ct. is the perfect size for me. It is substantial without being gaudy IMO. I have a 1.2 oval in a halo right now and I think the center stone is too small. How are you going to set it??? That can make the difference between understated and showy...Not that there''s anything wrong with showy!!!

I hope I describe it correctly but it''s like a bezel setting....it is round and has diamods on the round part on the top....also the band is pave half-way around....given this type of setting, I think it should look even bigger than a 2 which is why my male mind rationalized that a smaller one would suffice but I was ''shot down''....

Sounds like a halo to me. Hello bling!!! There are lots of them here. Here''s one thread https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/show-me-your-rings-with-halos.27882/

 

[shel]

A little off topic, but at least one diamond would be too big. There is thought to be at least one celestial star that has fused all of its hydrogen into carbon, and because of the tremendous heat and gravitational pressure, the core has turned into a diamond... that is about 10 billion trillion carats.

http://www.answerbag.com/q_view.php/17434

This is one diamond you wouldn''t want to get too close to (nor could you travel there).

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 10/11/2006 6:24:03 PM
Author: Mara
OH you are getting a halo setting, well for me that could change things. Basically a halo''d 2c looks more like a 3c. Which could be borderline on a small hand esp with the halo effect. My two cents is I don''t like large stones halo''d, they look like cocktail rings to me. If I was to halo a ring I''d probably do a 1.25c or similar...I have worn a halo 1c and loved it. I know that halo is a great way to give a smaller stone some oomph but I just don''t love the idea of a 2c in a halo. Maybe a SUPER THIN halo. Anyway...for me the 2c in a halo changes things BUT it''s still back to what SHE wants. If she loves the idea of a 2c in a halo, what can you really do??

I agree with mara. I don''t like halo''s on large stones, especially rounds. But if that''s what she wants then I agree with everyone to get her what she wants.