Calling all the Pregnant PS''ers

[AmberWaves]

Sunkist, don''t think DH has escaped my preggo hormones. He''s working at a summer camp in redondo beach and they do all this fun stuff, so I ask him why he won''t take me. "Um, because I''m WORKING? And they''re CHILDREN?" Yeah yeah. Suuuure.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Amber Eating more often helped me a lot with HB, as did TUMS.

 

[anchor31]

It's really interesting to read your stories about belly touching and your hubbies. Everyone has a different level of sensitivity to being touched and my own tolerance is pretty low unfortunately. I remember in the first years DH and I were together, I would jump right out of my skin when he'd snuggle from behind and touch my tummy. I just can't handle being touched there (or on the neck) for some reason. Now DH is the only one who can touch my tummy without me freaking out, but only if he doesn't sneak up on me!

Which brings me to my hubby story. DH is pretty involved and I appreciate it. He's not going to the appointments with me (except the first one and the upcoming u/s), but I don't mind because I wouldn't want him to miss work for 15 minutes check-ups. However, he talks to the baby all the time and loves touching my tummy. Sometimes my skin feels a bit ichy, and he likes to say that's because the baby likes having his/her back scratched! He also loves to say things like when I'm not feeling well it's because the baby's grumpy, or if I feel like eating something in particular it's because the baby likes it, etc. He's just adorable, gives him/her a whole personality already.

J was always a family-oriented person and can't wait for the baby to come. He's pretty squeamish about blood and other bodily fluids, so he's not interested in being particularly involved in the delivery apart from the hand-holding and massage sort of thing (he does not want to cut the cord), but I'm fine with that. As long as he's there to support me, the doctors and nurses can handle the rest.

What are your husbands' thoughts/intentions towards delivery and their role in the process?

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/21/2009 11:58:01 AM
Author: sunkist
Oh you guys are making me feel so much better! Thank you pandora, Viz, Tao, Rockpaper, DD, and Amber! Viz, that is so funny that hubby shouts at baby to stop kicking, and you take what you can get

heehee! guys can be so suave, eh?

And Tao, DD and Amber, it''s great to know that your hubbies are involved and interested. I love hearing that too, I think it''s so cute!

I love my hubby so much and I think he will be a great dad eventually. He''s going to grow into it, like you guys say though. He doeosn''t hold other people''s babies now though, he''s just not interested. But he always says when it''s his kid, it will be different. I understand that. Awww, it''s just these pregnancy hormones that I think are going crazy.

Thanks again!

sunkist - My dad was like that. He wasn''t really interested in other people''s kids, but he turned out to be a great father. He loved us to bits, still does and always will. He spent a lot of time with us as kids, and I have this really cute picture of him holding my tiny infant self and my twin sister, one on each forearm, rocking us to sleep. I''m sure your hubby will bond with the twins when they''ll be here.

 

[lili]

Date: 7/21/2009 11:58:01 AM
Author: sunkist
Oh you guys are making me feel so much better! Thank you pandora, Viz, Tao, Rockpaper, DD, and Amber! Viz, that is so funny that hubby shouts at baby to stop kicking, and you take what you can get

heehee! guys can be so suave, eh?

And Tao, DD and Amber, it''s great to know that your hubbies are involved and interested. I love hearing that too, I think it''s so cute!

I love my hubby so much and I think he will be a great dad eventually. He''s going to grow into it, like you guys say though. He doeosn''t hold other people''s babies now though, he''s just not interested. But he always says when it''s his kid, it will be different. I understand that. Awww, it''s just these pregnancy hormones that I think are going crazy.

Thanks again!

Sunkist,
My hubby was like that too.
He''s great around kids who can talk and interact w/ him, but babies....not so much.
The first time he''s ever held a newborn was his niece, and you should see the "what do I do with this blob" look on his face.
He held her like you''d hold a watermelon. But when our baby was born, he''s really hands on with her -- cradle and burped her like a pro.
He actually got upset when I didn''t let him change her diaper.

 

[Sha]

Date: 7/20/2009 11:29:07 PM
Author: sunkist
Orbaya congrats and welcome!

Anchor I''m so sorry you''re still feeling so sick. I hope it goes away for you soon! My just sort of faded away, and one day just recently I noticed that I hadn''t felt sick lately. So I hope it disappears for you too.

Natalina I haven''t felt any pain down there yet, but you are a couple weeks ahead of me. I finally did feel round ligament pain the other day . It came on while I was exercising. It took me a while to realize what it was, but i remembered, ohhhh round ligament pain! Did the warm bath help your pain go away??


--
Ok, here''s my hormonal pregnancy rant of the day. I''m 22w2d and I don''t think I''ve had a rant yet, so I''m entitled to post one, right???

I have a question about husbands. Do your husbands pay attention to your growing belly/ changing body? My DH never voluntarily touches my belly and I sorta wish he would. I guess I just think about it all day and feel the baby moving and see it bumping around, so it''s always on my mind. But it seems like he doesn''t think about it much. When the baby is moving when DH is next to me I ask him to feel it moving and he does. I just kind of wish he would pay the baby/ my belly more attention voluntarily. Now, there is the fact that we don''t get that much time together because summer is his incredibly busy season for work. He doesn''t come home until like 10:30pm, so we don''t have a lot of time together. Now he does pay more attention to my chest that has filled out a bit and it''s ''huge'' to him

But I want to feel like he''s making a connection to the baby as well. I guess for some guys that really doesn''t happen until the baby is born and even then not until the baby really starts to interact with people. So I''m not bugging him to feel something he''s not feeling yet. I''m just venting to you guys.

Anyone else have this experience with your hubby too?

Oh, I know how you feel. DH and I just had this conversation over the weekend. He doesn''t voluntarily pay attention to my belly either. He used to rub my belly all the time before I got preggo and say how nice and smooth it was, and now I''m not preggo, he doesn''t. Sometimes he even holds me under my breasts but stops short of going down any further.

Almost as if it''s ''off limits''. Anyway, on Saturday I was looking at my friend''s facebook page, and his wife is also pregnant. There was a beautiful picture on there of him kissing her belly. DH came up behind me while I was watching and I immediately said to him, "You see...you never do that...

".. And that led to a whole conversation about him not being as involved with ''the belly'' as I''d like him to be. He felt bad and said he just never thought about it. I believe him, but I think subconsciously he still has a lot of anxieties about life changing after the baby, and that may be translating into his lack of involvement with the belly as well.

I hope he''s able to bond a bit better once the baby starts to kick, or at the very least, after it''s born.

On a related note - anyone feel self-conscious about their growing bodies while getting dressed in front of DH? I do, and I haven''t even gained much weight yet. How do your DH''s make you feel about your changing shape?

 

[lili]

Date: 7/20/2009 11:29:07 PM
Author: sunkist
Orbaya congrats and welcome!
I have a question about husbands. Do your husbands pay attention to your growing belly/ changing body? My DH never voluntarily touches my belly and I sorta wish he would. I guess I just think about it all day and feel the baby moving and see it bumping around, so it''s always on my mind. But it seems like he doesn''t think about it much. When the baby is moving when DH is next to me I ask him to feel it moving and he does. I just kind of wish he would pay the baby/ my belly more attention voluntarily. Now, there is the fact that we don''t get that much time together because summer is his incredibly busy season for work. He doesn''t come home until like 10:30pm, so we don''t have a lot of time together. Now he does pay more attention to my chest that has filled out a bit and it''s ''huge'' to him

But I want to feel like he''s making a connection to the baby as well. I guess for some guys that really doesn''t happen until the baby is born and even then not until the baby really starts to interact with people. So I''m not bugging him to feel something he''s not feeling yet. I''m just venting to you guys.
Anyone else have this experience with your hubby too?

Sunkist,

My husband wasn''t into touching my belly either.
One reason is that he was a bit weird out by the fetal movement, but mostly he thinks that we are hurting (or bothering) the baby when we put our hands on the belly.
He asked how I like it if I have someone''s hand pressing on my face all the time

 

[cellososweet]

Date: 7/21/2009 1:56:16 AM
Author: Laila619

Date: 7/20/2009 3:01:23 PM
Author: cellososweet
Awww Anchor. I''m sorry hon. It''s so annoying. This woman touched my belly at the doctors office, so I rubbed hers back. She was so embarassed and taken aback. I told her I thought we were playing some game I was unfamiliar with like ''Touch the complete and utter stranger.'' Pretty snappy of me, but it really annoyed me that she touched me in the first place.

Granted I''m a non preggo, but I''m sorry I think that''s kind of mean.

Most belly rubbers mean well, they just don''t know any better unfortunately. She was just excited for you and for your baby! I totally understand it''s annoying, and I wouldn''t like it either but that woman probably felt sooo awful when she just was happy for you and for the little one you''re carrying.

Anyway, just hang in there!

Get pregnant and get back to me. Sorry to be rude, but if you''ve had pneumonia for your almost your entire first trimester and a NURSE at a WOMENS CLINIC is rubbing your stomach, you''ll lose your temper too. The point was to make her feel awful (yeah, sue me. I''m being honest). As I said, it was snappy of me, but she works at a womens clinic, she has to know that a lot of patients don''t like that. She wasn''t even examining me. She was just walking through the waiting room and was like "oh wow!" oh wow? really? you''ve never seen a pregnant woman? You work at a freaking clinic. I could''ve just been fat for all she knows. I just think that people have no social boundaries. I don''t give a hoot if I''m pregnant, my body is not public property. It''s still my body and even though pregnancy is such a public thing, it doesn''t give people the right to touch me. I''m like an animal at the zoo. If you hold food above my head, I''ll snap your fingers off and if you touch me, I''ll make you regret it.

 

[AmberWaves]

Anchor: regarding delivery, DH is all for the gross part of it.

He''s very into medical "stuff" as a major in all things biology/anatomy and musculatory (which I believe I just made a word). He never gets grossed out, which kills me- I am so squeamish. All in all, he wants to be there for the whole thing- whether it''s a c-sec or vaginal. We''ve already decided it''s going to be just the two of us, we haven''t decided if we''ll tell the parents (other than my dad, who will watch the dog) right away or after we''re almost done.

Anyone have opinions on that? Are you telling your family the instant you go into labor or waiting? Who do you want with you in the delivery room?

Sha: regarding my changing shape, I think it''s because I was heavier before, and my stomach was definitely softer to begin with, that I enjoy the shape I''m turning into. Since I haven''t gained any weight yet, (I''ve actually lost weight, since my weight has stayed the same since day one but the baby is a pound - not counting all the other goop), my shape has thinned out other than the belly, which is now sloping into a hard round belly. I''ve loved being pregnant, and with each day I''m bigger I get happier! I''m crazy.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/21/2009 2:44:34 PM
Author: AmberWaves
Anchor: regarding delivery, DH is all for the gross part of it.

He''s very into medical ''stuff'' as a major in all things biology/anatomy and musculatory (which I believe I just made a word). He never gets grossed out, which kills me- I am so squeamish. All in all, he wants to be there for the whole thing- whether it''s a c-sec or vaginal. We''ve already decided it''s going to be just the two of us, we haven''t decided if we''ll tell the parents (other than my dad, who will watch the dog) right away or after we''re almost done.

Anyone have opinions on that? Are you telling your family the instant you go into labor or waiting? Who do you want with you in the delivery room?

Sha: regarding my changing shape, I think it''s because I was heavier before, and my stomach was definitely softer to begin with, that I enjoy the shape I''m turning into. Since I haven''t gained any weight yet, (I''ve actually lost weight, since my weight has stayed the same since day one but the baby is a pound - not counting all the other goop), my shape has thinned out other than the belly, which is now sloping into a hard round belly. I''ve loved being pregnant, and with each day I''m bigger I get happier! I''m crazy.

Re: Delivery, it''s definitely going to be just the two of us. There''s no way I''m letting anyone else in that delivery room. I''m a very private person, I didn''t even want to have a "public" wedding, let alone a "public" L&D!

I want to wait until the baby is born to call our parents, DH wants to call them right away. So... we''ll have to agree on something somehow. I''m afraid it''ll make me feel pressured, is that weird? I think DH might be afraid his mom will throw a fit if we don''t call her. Which she probably will... But since she throws fits about everything and anything, I can''t bring myself to care.

Re: Changing shape... I have CP, so have multiple reasons to be self-conscious about my body (surgical scars, atrophied muscles on the left leg, that sort of thing), but DH never cared about these things and always says how beautiful he thinks I am. So I''ve stopped feeling self-conscious in front of him a long time ago, and fortunately pregnancy hasn''t changed that. Like Amber, I haven''t really gained any weight, so that also helps.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/21/2009 2:41:20 PM
Author: cellososweet

Date: 7/21/2009 1:56:16 AM
Author: Laila619

Date: 7/20/2009 3:01:23 PM
Author: cellososweet
Awww Anchor. I''m sorry hon. It''s so annoying. This woman touched my belly at the doctors office, so I rubbed hers back. She was so embarassed and taken aback. I told her I thought we were playing some game I was unfamiliar with like ''Touch the complete and utter stranger.'' Pretty snappy of me, but it really annoyed me that she touched me in the first place.

Granted I''m a non preggo, but I''m sorry I think that''s kind of mean.

Most belly rubbers mean well, they just don''t know any better unfortunately. She was just excited for you and for your baby! I totally understand it''s annoying, and I wouldn''t like it either but that woman probably felt sooo awful when she just was happy for you and for the little one you''re carrying.

Anyway, just hang in there!

Get pregnant and get back to me. Sorry to be rude, but if you''ve had pneumonia for your almost your entire first trimester and a NURSE at a WOMENS CLINIC is rubbing your stomach, you''ll lose your temper too. The point was to make her feel awful (yeah, sue me. I''m being honest). As I said, it was snappy of me, but she works at a womens clinic, she has to know that a lot of patients don''t like that. She wasn''t even examining me. She was just walking through the waiting room and was like ''oh wow!'' oh wow? really? you''ve never seen a pregnant woman? You work at a freaking clinic. I could''ve just been fat for all she knows. I just think that people have no social boundaries. I don''t give a hoot if I''m pregnant, my body is not public property. It''s still my body and even though pregnancy is such a public thing, it doesn''t give people the right to touch me. I''m like an animal at the zoo. If you hold food above my head, I''ll snap your fingers off and if you touch me, I''ll make you regret it.

Well, I''ve been pregnant, so my two cents - I do not like to make people feel awful if they don''t have any ill will toward me. Yes, some people have no social boundaries. But I''d prefer to be one with social boundaries and kindness too. You can make a point without humiiliating someone.

Plus, such a chip on my shoulder would do no good for my backpains.

I can understand your POV to a degree, but I just don''t share it. And I''m the girl who got rubbed by an Outback Steakhouse waitress who then turned to my mid fifties year old boss and asked if he was the father.

I am sorry about the pneumonia...I can see how that would ramp up the crank factor.

 

[ChinaCat]

Anchor- My DH is totally squeamish about delivery. If he had his way, he''s stay in the lobby and pass out cigars. I told him we weren''t having a baby in the 1950''s!

But he will be there, he knows I need someone to hold my hand. To be honest, I think I''m more worried about having him there. I know it sounds silly and a bit immature, but I don''t really want DH seeing me that way. I saw this stupid Oprah in the 1990''s where she had couples on that the man no longer saw his wife in the same way since seeing birth- I believe the phrase was something like "once I saw it as a birth canal, I can''t see it as the love canal". So stupid, but I guess it''s stuck with me! BUT my DH is a great hubby and dad-to-be, and I know it will be alright. Everyone says that even the most squeamish are in total awe and thought it was the most amazing experience to be there when their child was born. And I don''t want him to miss that. Plus, the guy was in the freaking army, I think he can handle it. He''s just going to have to deal, I''m the one that has to go through it!

Sha- I get what you mean. I haven''t really gained much weight except for my belly, and my DH actually is so cute about my preggo body- always telling me how cute I look and cuddling me and giving me compliments. He isn''t grossed out at all, which makes me feel a ton better about myself. But I still am a bit shy about standing around in my full glory, I just feel self-conscious. Plus though I haven''t gained a lot of weight, I am convinced that I have cellulite now, and there are weird veins and things going on. I try not to dwell on it, but it''s hard to watch your body become something you aren''t familiar with.

Amber- Only DH and I in labor room. MAYBE my mom, she is a very calming and soothing presence for me. But definitely no one else. We will call my mom and dad when we head to the hospital- they live about a 4/5 hour drive away. MIL lives in another state, so we''ll call her but she won''t be there. Part of me feels badly about this, and feels like we should ask her to come around the due date so she could be at the hospital. BUT I really don''t want company at all for the first week or two, and I can''t really ask her to come and then leave. So I guess I''m slightly relieved that she lives too far.

 

[vizsla]

i''ve been super duper self conscious about my changing body. and don''t feel ''beautiful'' like some women do when they are pg. hopefully the bigger my bump gets, the prettier i will feel. i''ve stop looking at the scale when i have an apt. it was really freaking me out and made me feel sooo much worse to have that number in front of my face. DH does an ok job (not without some prodding) to tell me that i''m more beautiful pg than i was pre-pg (even if it''s a lie, i don''t mind hearing it ;P

as far as the hospital situation goes... we are not telling anyone when i go into labor. i don''t need the audience. our neighbor will be the only one who knows so he can let the dog out... and since my mom lives 2 hours away (DH parents are close) i figured after he''s born and i''ve had ample time getting to know my baby... i''ll call my mom and wait about 2 hours before calling DH parents... that way the competition to who gets to ''see'' the baby first is on an equal playing field (yes, my mom is that catty when it comes to things like this).

off to the beach! have a stellar week ladies!

 

[AmberWaves]

Vizsla- my family is also oddly competitive, mostly my dad and mom who are divorced. I ask about calling the family because our parents literally live right down the street. In fact, other than my brother in Sydney, the farthest a family member is is probably a half an hour? During rush hour? So it''s really tough to think that we''ll call them and they''ll just be there... WAITING for us to announce my vagina has blown out a new baby girl. So weird.

 

[vizsla]

amber - lol lol lol!
i know right? it is sooo weird... i don''t do well under pressure ... and to *know* you have an audience just waiting, waiting, waiting seems like it would make the whole thing take longer... like i''d tense up or something. PLUS the thought of MIL rushing in seconds after baby is born just sounds awful. i''m taking plllleeeennntttyyy of time to get to know baby, clean up, maybe even get in a post-delivery nap before we call anyone. the funny thing is that my mom lives super close to my sister and LOVES that her in-laws live far away.. so she can hog the nieces and such.. but gets totally weird about my in-laws being so close. yes, she''s a walking contradiction.

cc - i''m jealous your mom is calming... mine is totally neurotic. i have a friend who''s MIL is actually a doula.. could you imagine how awesome that would be?

 

[AmberWaves]

I second Vizsla, China!

My mom is a hand wringer of the ultimate power. She''s one of those people who will stand around and ask, "What can I do? WHAT. CAN. I. DO." She''ll keep doing it until we finally say- NOTHING! GO OUTSIDE!!! That''s also why I''m hesitant to have her there when we finally go home. Paul has decided to make up a list of things we''ll want help with- Laundry, mopping/sweeping, cooking, letting Amber nap, taking the dog out... things like that. That way if someone (ahem- MOM) asks the ever painful "What can I do?" question, we can just point to the board. Being an elementary school teacher, I''m imagining Paul will even have a nice little system of a wipe off board where you initial beside the job- maybe even gold stickers!!

 

[orbaya]

Date: 7/20/2009 11:29:07 PM
Author: sunkist
Orbaya congrats and welcome!



I have a question about husbands. Do your husbands pay attention to your growing belly/ changing body? My DH never voluntarily touches my belly and I sorta wish he would. I guess I just think about it all day and feel the baby moving and see it bumping around, so it''s always on my mind. But it seems like he doesn''t think about it much. When the baby is moving when DH is next to me I ask him to feel it moving and he does. I just kind of wish he would pay the baby/ my belly more attention voluntarily. Now, there is the fact that we don''t get that much time together because summer is his incredibly busy season for work. He doesn''t come home until like 10:30pm, so we don''t have a lot of time together. Now he does pay more attention to my chest that has filled out a bit and it''s ''huge'' to him

But I want to feel like he''s making a connection to the baby as well. I guess for some guys that really doesn''t happen until the baby is born and even then not until the baby really starts to interact with people. So I''m not bugging him to feel something he''s not feeling yet. I''m just venting to you guys.


Anyone else have this experience with your hubby too?

Thanks for the welcome!

My hubby does touch my belly. In fact, he will lightly touch his fist to my stomach because he''s giving the baby a fist bump! LOL! It''s pretty funny, and cute. When we go to bed he''ll kiss my belly goodnight, and he''ll randomly just pat it throughout the day.

I''m sure you hubby is making a connection with the baby, even if he''s not showing it physically. Like you said, when he sees the baby for the first time I''ll bet he''ll be head over heels in love.

 

[ChinaCat]

Amber, Vizla- I know, I''m very lucky in the parental dept. They are totally supportive but not intrusive. My mom is just really good with babies, way more than I am, and she knows how to take care of me without hovering. I told her I wouldn''t be doing this baby thing if she wasn''t around! I am so grateful she is coming to stay with us for a bit, just to help take care of us, as my DH says- help walk the dog, hold the baby so I can shower/nap, go to the grocery store, etc. However, if she wasn''t like that, I would not want her to stay with us. Vizla, I would so wait to call anyone if I thought it would make the experience more stressful than it already is. And as much as I love my parents, I am a little freaked out by them "waiting" for me to- oh, how did Amber put it?

But I know I will be glad they are there. Amber, I think a list is a great idea. Have heard of that for when people drop by and want to help, but don''t know what to do. Just point them to the list!

Sunkist- I also meant to say that I don''t think whether your DH is "into" the belly is any indication of them being into the baby/a good father. I can totally understand how it''s such an alien concept to them, sometimes it is to me too. And like TGal said, I also can see how it would be hard to bond with a baby until it is interacting with you. And when I think about it, my DH was definitely less understanding/into the belly when I was first preggo. I mean, he was excited in theory, but didn''t really get how I was feeling and didn''t really connect that there was a baby in there. Now that I''m showing so much more and now that he''s reading all these books, it''s really clicked for him. Plus I think it helped that he knows it''s a son- which is why I agreed to find out the sex, even though I probably would have preferred to keep it a surprise. It definitely helped him to bond/visualize. Anyways, don''t worry about it, and enjoy this special time that only you have with your little one in there! Once that baby smiles at him, he''ll be wrapped around it''s finger!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/21/2009 4:38:35 PM
Author: AmberWaves
Vizsla- my family is also oddly competitive, mostly my dad and mom who are divorced. I ask about calling the family because our parents literally live right down the street. In fact, other than my brother in Sydney, the farthest a family member is is probably a half an hour? During rush hour? So it''s really tough to think that we''ll call them and they''ll just be there... WAITING for us to announce my vagina has blown out a new baby girl. So weird.

Date: 7/21/2009 5:26:22 PM
Author: vizsla
amber - lol lol lol!
i know right? it is sooo weird... i don''t do well under pressure ... and to *know* you have an audience just waiting, waiting, waiting seems like it would make the whole thing take longer... like i''d tense up or something. PLUS the thought of MIL rushing in seconds after baby is born just sounds awful. i''m taking plllleeeennntttyyy of time to get to know baby, clean up, maybe even get in a post-delivery nap before we call anyone. the funny thing is that my mom lives super close to my sister and LOVES that her in-laws live far away.. so she can hog the nieces and such.. but gets totally weird about my in-laws being so close. yes, she''s a walking contradiction.

cc - i''m jealous your mom is calming... mine is totally neurotic. i have a friend who''s MIL is actually a doula.. could you imagine how awesome that would be?

Yes, that''s exactly it! My ILs live about 20 minutes from us (

) and my parents a little over an hour, and just the idea of having them just wait for me to push the baby out of my vagina... Ick. Especially the ILs. And then having them rush in the minute he/she is born. No thanks. Especially the ILs.

They mean well, but... They''re so overwhelming and draining and push my buttons and I don''t think I could handle them so soon after L&D! So... hopefully DH will understand and we''ll wait a bit before calling everyone.

 

[natalina]

My DH talks to the baby and likes to lay his hand on my belly when we go to bed to feel her move. That being said, he really hasn''t commented much about how I look now. Other than one "wow you really are pregnant, huh?" at about 24 weeks

. I also don''t feel like he really realizes how much this whole process changes everything for a woman. Well, except for a couple nights ago when I had to get in the tub at 4am because my pelvis was hurting- I think he felt really bad about that. Maybe it''s because I haven''t really had any cravings or any of the classic "sending the husband out for ice cream at 2am" episodes that you see with preggos on TV. I don''t know, but sometimes I almost feel like he forgets I''m pregnant.

As for the delivery, there is NO WAY anyone will be in there besides DH. I get embarassed really easily, and I don''t even like the idea of him seeing all that. I joke that if it was up to me I would go off into the woods and give birth alone

. Both sets of parents live 3 hours away (in opposite directions though). We haven''t really discussed our plan as to when to call them, but I''m thinking we''ll probably get settled in at the hospital and then call them. Someone will have to come stay with our dogs. I totally agree with the idea that it would feel like pressure to know that they are all out there in the waiting room watching the clock. We live about 2 blocks from the hospital, so maybe we will just call both sets and have them make the trip up to our house, then let them know we''ll call when she''s here and we''re all cleaned up, then they can come visit.

VRBeauty- that''s what my mom said when I told her we were thinking about Emerson Lake! I''ve never heard of them!

Vizsla- Charlotte is one of my faves too, but DH veto''d it.

Amber- I really like the way Avery Lake sounds too. Sounds so peaceful. Avie would be cute for a nickname, you''re right. I love your Piper Jane- so cute!

 

[littlelysser]

Hi ladies!

I haven''t been around much, as I''ve been actually working. I know, what nutjob starts a job at 32 weeks pregnant? Apparently this one. I have been exhausted. But I''m actually enjoying working again. Apparently, I may have actually missed being a lawyer a little bit. Shh. Don''t tell anyone. Anyway, 33 and 1/2 weeks here. Baby is moving a lot, which is nice. Sometimes it is a bit uncomfortable, but eh, I''ll take it. Also, my right foot is swelling like mad during the day. Only my right. For whatever reason. Anyone have anything like that?

My shower was this past weekend. Got some good baby clothes, but not a lot of stuff on the registry. Frankly, it was a little annoying. I don''t want to appear ungrateful, but I really didn''t need a robe made for an infant...what I needed was a bathtub! Folks seemed to pretty much entirely disregarded my registry and bought what they wanted. Oh well.

Welcome Orbaya!

Amber - Interesting question on the delivery room stuffs. Will be me, my DH and my mom. My DH, the amazing and wonderful man that he is, isn''t so good with blood. So we''ll definitely need the back up from my mom. And like CC, my mom is uber calming and she''s one of my best friends. So it''ll be great for her to be there. Actually, she''s going to go to the labor class with me. DH will read about it - but when I told him there was a video we''d have to watch he turned kind of green and looked super queasy...just at the thought of a video. So yeah. He may end up going down for the count.

CC - We STILL do not have a name picked out for the kid. I''m hoping when he comes out we''ll just KNOW he is an Abraham Thomas. Or something. GAH. FWIW, I actually think the name Dashiell is pretty great. I love the nickname Dash as well. I also really Oliver. Oh, and my DH would be perfectly happy in the waiting room as well...see my above post re: horrible queasiness. Poor DH. He''s going to have man up for this one...OR pass out when he''s in there. Should be interesting. Last but not least, I feel you on the mom love. I always tell people I feel like I hit the parental lottery. My folks just moved to town, after they retired, and they live about 1/2 a mile away. It is fantastic. We see them quite a bit, but they don''t intrude or otherwise bother us. I''m so grateful for her. I know she''ll be the calming presence during labor. Plus, she''s done it before, TWICE!

Sabine - Glad your anniversary was nice! I''m sorry your delivery plans are up in the air - but like others have said, the baby at the end is the key! I''ll be thinking good thoughts for you. And I''m sorry about the parental drama. I think it might be less stressful for you if they visited separately, plus, you''ll have more time with some help, which I think could be super helpful.

SweetPea - Congrats on team blue!

Cello - Glad to see you are doing better. You''ve been on my mind. And I can understand that feeling weird about belly touching. I haven''t really had strangers doing it, but friends and family have and it always seems a bit weird. Don''t know why.

Fisher - FWIW, I''d be a bit uncomfortable with a hospital that could take more than 1/2 an hour or an hour to get to. But you have to do what feels right for you. DH and I are lucky, our hospital of choice is about 10 minutes from our house during rush hour and 3 minutes during off time.

Mandarine - My mom and sis threw my shower. I got my sis some makeup from Sephora and DH and I are taking my mom and dad to a nice dinner as a thank you.

Qt - Have you heard any more from your doc?

DD - Thanks for sharing your birth story!

Anchor - Hope your GD test went well! Have you talked to your doc about your ms? I know there are a number of different things that they can do to help with it. My doc recommended 25 Mgs of B6 3 times a day and a 1/2 a unisom before bed. I also switched from a prenatal to flintstones and folic acid. Long story short, you shouldn''t still be feeling crummy! Oh, and I''m hoping my DH will stay upright enough to be a hand holder and general calmer-downer. My mom thinks he''s going to have a tough time with seeing me in pain and being unable to help.

Steph - Amy makes some good frozen stuffs - all organic and veggie. I actually had one today, it was great!

Natalina - I''ve been having pain in between my legs as well. Mine isn''t horrible, but it gets uncomfortable. Particularly if I''ve been laying in one position. I''d definitely mention it to your doc if it really bothering you.

Viszla, Phoenix, Tao, and anyone else I''ve missed - Hello.

Alright, I must go to bed. I''m so farking tired. Sheesh, I wrote a book here.

LL - 33w3d

 

[qtiekiki]

DH and belly
DH didn''t care too much about touching my belly the first time around, so I am pretty sure it''ll be the same this time. When I said to him "don''t you want to feel her kick", he responds with "I did already". He told me he didn''t feel a bond with the baby when I was PG. It wasn''t until she was reacting (probably around 6 months) to him that he really feel the bond. It''s really interesting how moms and dads are different.

Changing body
I am taking it harder this time, and think that I am showing already. I think I''ll feel better when I have a real bump. A few weeks ago, DH actually said that if someone didn''t know I was pg, then they will probably think I am chubby. He realized he was being insensitive and apologized. Ever since that time, he''s been good at telling me I was great.

DH and delivery
DH was totally grossed out during the delivery. He is totally opposite of Amber''s DH, and is not into all those medical things. He had mentioned being grossed out quite a few times b/c of how messy the whole process was (mostly the iodine the nurse used while massaging the perineum), but not of the actual process (did that make sense?). It did change his view of me but in a positive way; I think he was amazed by what my body can do. It hasn''t affected our relationship.

Who will be in the labor room?
Will be just us again. The ILs are retired and live with us, so they were around the whole time when I was laboring at home. And obviously they know when we headed to the hospital, but they didn''t asked to be there. We called my parents after we got to the hospital (my parents live 300 something miles away). I gave birth at 2:30am, so no one visited until the next morning around 11am.

 

[sunkist]

Date: 7/21/2009 2:25:09 PM
Author: Sha

Oh, I know how you feel. DH and I just had this conversation over the weekend. He doesn''t voluntarily pay attention to my belly either. He used to rub my belly all the time before I got preggo and say how nice and smooth it was, and now I''m not preggo, he doesn''t. Sometimes he even holds me under my breasts but stops short of going down any further.

Oh Sha you cracked me up re: how your hubby stops short of touching your belly

That''s how my hubby is too.

RE: changing shape. I feel pretty good about the way I look. I don''t mind walking around in front of hubby baring it all. He has said that I''m the most fit preggo even I don''t know about the "most", but I do feel good. I''m still going to the gym 3 days a week and that helps my feel good about my shape. From the font view, I think I still don''t really look preggo. From the profile view I think sometimes it just looks like I''m gaining wait, but if I let my belly just hang/relax then it looks more round and cute.

Oh! I got my first awkward comment from a ''stranger'' today about my preggo-ness! He just asked how far along I was, I told him about 4.5 months (although now that I think about it I guess I''m 5 months today) and he said "Ohhh! It''s going to be a big one then isn''t it?? Maybe twins!"

Thanks, Mr. So what are you saying, I''m big?? I am not! I''m tiny! Of course I just smiled and chuckled and said something like "We''ll see!"

Cello I''m sorry that lady annoyed you so much! It is kinda wierd that she as a nurse would still be touching ladies bellies! Maybe she is new to the profession???

I love reading everyone''s stories about hubby''s reaction to your belly/baby.

RE: delivery room. It will just be hubby and I in L&D. I''m not sure when we''ll call our parents. I still need to discuss that with DH. If it''s not in the middle of the night I imagine we''d call my parents right away. Or if it is in the middle of the night, maybe we''ll text them. As for my hubby''s parents, they live only a couple blocks away from us, and I DO NOT want them at the hospital before it''s time for them to see the baby. They really crowd my hubby, but they pretty much always seem to give me my space. So I''m pretty sure they would stay away from the hospital if hubby told them I didn''t want them there yet. We''ll probably let them know it''s started once we''re settled into our room and then give them a call once baby is born and we''re all cleaned up and rested.

Amber dear, I love your descriptiveness re: birthing... hahahah!

And who said the comment about the birth canal and the love canal!?!? hahaha! OH my goodness you''re right that is so cheesy and quite a awkward description!

Oh you all have me cracking up tonight!

Wishing you all a relaxing and wonderfully preggo night!

 

[qtiekiki]

littlelysser
Yeah it can be annoying when people gets you the "cute" stuffs instead of useful stuffs. Ever since being a mom, I always get people stuffs off their registry b/c I learned how useless some stuffs can be.

Glad you are enjoying your new job.

No I haven''t heard anything from the dr, but I just take it that no news is good news. Plus I am not cramping or bleeding, so I am not too worried. I''ve been stressed for past few days b/c of BFing issue with M. I decided to stop pumping today, and it''s been a big relief.

 

[Pandora II]

Anchor, my DH is super squeamish and needle-phobic despite coming from a medical family so he didn''t want to be anywhere near the action or cut the umbilical cord or anything.

However, when they took me to theatre he was great and had no problems with all the medical bit going on. He even watched what he described as a ''slasher movie'' without passing out or anything. He was also happy to hold and hug our daughter even though she''d only been towelled off and so was not exactly sparkly clean!

Labour and Delivery:

We told MIL and my parents the evening of the day my water''s had broken - but not FIL. I knew that my parents and MIL would stay away, but FIL could well have decided to rush down to London with his ghastly wife in tow - they don''t understand boundaries!

My dad kept in touch regularly throughout the labour (cellphones are permitted in the delivery rooms

) which was really nice as he was very reassuring - although my mother says he was going nuts at home as he knew things weren''t looking good (he''s an MD and did a lot of obstetrics in the past). I was a bit suprised when he told me to ring anytime during the night if I was worried or if she arrived.

Daisy was born on the Sunday, my mother came to see us on the Wednesday, his mother popped in on the Friday and we saw FIL when she was 2 weeks old.

If I''d had relatives turn up when I went into labour they would have been very disappointed - not only would they have been at the hospital for best part of 2 days waiting for her to be born, but since I was then in ICU they wouldn''t have seen me or the baby until Wednesday at the earliest as only the father is allowed into ICU and the baby cannot be taken out of the unit.

Even with a normal delivery I think you would want time to come back down to earth and spend a little time just the three of you before seeing other people. They are magical moments and I''m glad DH and I didn''t have to share them with anyone.

I''d also have hated the thought of people sitting there waiting - like I needed to hurry up so they didn''t have to wait too long!

 

[Sabine]

I totally get all of you who don''t want to call family until after you deliver! If I was going to just wait and go naturally that wasn''t going to be a problem for us as our family is 7 hours away...but I was thinking about what I would do with an induction date. I decided that even if the date was set and parents were in town, they would NOT be waiting at the hospital. I wouldn''t have minded if they came to the hospital right after deliver, but the thought of them out there or even coming in to visit while laboring did NOT appeal to me at all. Now that I''m probably having a c/s, I won''t mind if they are at the hospital.

As for dh, I don''t need to worry about him in the room with me. He''s delivered babies before and scrubbed in on c/s...so he''s going to be better at this than I am!

As for him and my belly...he''s somewhere in the middle I guess. He''s been pretty hands off except for when he first started moving, but then I told him I was feeling a bit neglected and so was baby, so he''s been more affectionate. He doesn''t talk to the belly much, but he does like to rub it when he isn''t passed out already...

TMI alert though...he''s totally freaked out about having sex at this point. I was hoping to do it once to try to soften the cervix, but he said last time he could feel the baby move and it really freaked him out, which I get. It didn''t really feel very good for me last time either, so I guess we''re just going to be waiting for awhile.

Nothing much else is new with me other than that I NEED to stop my online shopping addiction! I just got a $100 old navy bill, and I''m tempted to put an order through for another $75...stuff like fold over cotton skirts and yoga pants, nonmat. camis, and comfy looking shirts that would be easy to pull up to nurse. It''s all stuff I would need since I don''t think my wardrobe will be very post-baby body and nursing friendly, but at the same time, I''m not sure on sizes and stuff or what will "really" work, so I''m trying to make myself wait. Seriously, I ordered one of the fold over skirts, and it fits me now even though I''m huge cause it''s so stretchy, but I think it MIGHT still fit fine once I deliver too...

 

[steph72276]

Sabine, I would probably just wait a bit on ordering lots of clothes to see what size you are. Everyone is different, but at least with my c-section, I was so pumped up with meds that I only went home a few lbs lighter than I was before delivery. Within a week or 2, I lost like 20 pounds, so I was wearing maternity clothes for those first few weeks, then I had to go shopping because I lost a lot dramatically. You don''t want to spend a lot of $ on clothes that you might not get a chance to wear. Plus, those first few weeks, you probably won''t want to wear anything but comfy sweats anyway!

 

[AmberWaves]

Sunkist: I hate to break it to you, but 22 weeks is our SIXTH month!!

At least, according to This site , we are just starting our sixth month!

 

[sunkist]

Date: 7/22/2009 11:11:26 AM
Author: AmberWaves
Sunkist: I hate to break it to you, but 22 weeks is our SIXTH month!!


At least, according to This site , we are just starting our sixth month!

Haha! Oh my goodness you''re right. We''re 5.1 months! I can''t believe how fast this goes

Sooo, Amber, happy start of the 6th month to you today! It''s exactly 4 more months to your due date today!!

 

[AmberWaves]

Eeee, don''t remind me! We have done NOTHING in the storage room we''ll use as a nursery! We haven''t picked out the paint color, nor have we registered. Eeeeeeeeeek.