Anxiety anyone?

[drk]

I went to see my family doc about my insomnia issue, and she feels like the root cause of the problem is anxiety (plus weaning and the associated hormonal shifts). She says the anxiety would have to be an issue longer-term (like 6 months) before she'd think of putting me on meds for it. In the meantime I'm supposed to read The Worry Cure and think about whether therapy might help me.

Anyone else have experience with anxiety? Did self-help sorts of things work for you? Any helpful tips?

 

[charbie]

When I transitioned from college to the stress of full time work supporting myself, I began having anxiety attacks attributed to the stress. I had terrible issues sleeping, would literally just lay in bed having to move my legs staring at the ceiling and remind myself to breathe. Worst.Thing.Ever.

Some of the things that works for me were relaxation techniques I found on the internet. When id have trouble sleeping, I scoured the internet looking for the cure. What I found worked was to lay in bed, and then concentrate on tightening each muscle in my body, starting at my feet. So curl my toes, hold it 10 seconds, then slowly release the tension in my toes while envisioning the stress leaving. Then move on to tighten my calves, hold and release. Move slowly up your body, only tightening one area at a time, and concentrate on ONLY those muscles.

Also, when my heart would race, I was taught to bare down like I was going to make a BM, since that will arrest your heart for a second to help slow the pace. Focusing on the in and out of my breath also would help.

Now, I did all of this alongside Buspar at first (which I switched off of it bc I didn't like how I felt my head was in the clouds) and then moved on to Celexa. I had a hard time coming off the Celexa, but did a few months ago and found my anxiety hant crept back on too much.
Best of luck, bc I sympathize with the terrible feeling anxiety can leave you with.

 

[Puppmom]

I'll post more later but YES! DH and I see a therapist and it does help. It's strange because I am a very rational person but sometimes my worries get such a strong grip on me.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Thank you for posting this drk. I'm still struggling with horrible anxiety and insomnia that was never full "cured" with the zoloft they gave me for PPD. But I really think the PPD is a result of the anxiety and lack of sleep. Last night I woke up at 12:00 with Aidan and wasn't able to fall asleep again until 3

 

[Puppmom]

I’m back…

So I am an excessive worrier and it really does prevent me from enjoying things sometimes. Example – DH and I had tickets to a show in January that we bought before N was even born. We were so excited about going and just getting out for the night. Several days before the show the anxiety started to build because they were forecasting a storm. The storm came the day before the show and the roads were clear by the night of the show. Temps were low and the roads seemed wet. I was really nervous about going but forced myself. On the way there, my heart started racing and I ultimately MELTED DOWN. I cried and shouted at DH several times for his *unsafe* driving. I couldn’t come down even after we arrived safely and the whole evening was ruined for both of us. This is just one of many ways it impacts us. I also had the same exact problem with difficulty falling asleep because I was worried DS would wake. There was something about that uncertainty that stressed me out! Then, when I would hear DS cry, I would get this feeling in the pit of stomach – you know that feeling you get when something really bad happens? …only it was just a routine thing going on.

It’s created troubles for DH and me because he has difficulty telling my level of anxiety because my outward reaction always seems like my anxiety level is very high. One of the things that I’ve learned to do is give DH a number. So, maybe a few hours after an issue, I’ll have perspective and I can go back and give DH a number on a scale of 1-10 of how worked up I was. I think the therapist wants us to use this tool to help her (and us) gauge what things trigger anxiety and what things are just annoying or irritating.

The therapist appeals to my rational side which really makes a difference. We do a lot of “What’s the worst that would happen if….” I’m still not good by any means but DH and I have definitely noticed a difference.

I’m interested to hear what you think of the book. I’ve never really been open to medication so I look for other solutions. I don’t know why but it may be a bit of the control freak in me that’s resistant to it.

On another note, I’m really worried about how I’ll do during the weaning process. I heard that it triggers upset in a lot of women and I’m certainly vulnerable in that sense.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

It's weird because sometimes I can pinpoint what I'm anxious about but not the source (I assume I'm projecting my anxiety about something else onto the trigger event, etc).

For example, these days I'm having anxiety about my bond with Aidan. I know it's related to feeling guilty about not doing it. But I now worry that I've somehow damaged him by not doing it or our bond isn't as strong because I couldn't do it. It doesn't help that while he was sort of ambivalent to my boobs earlier on, not he's obsessed with them and is constantly rooting around for a nip in the middle of the night. He's not nursed since he was 5 weeks old!

And like you I lay in bed awake thinking about the next time he's going to wake up and essentially count down the minutes until it happens.

And I'm anxious about him being autistic even though I KNOW he's not.

And the anxiety has totally flowed into my work. I'm constantly worried about getting laid off or fired, even though I bust my ass and the chances of it are slim. It's like the anxiety trumps my rationality.

 

[fieryred33143]

DrK I read your original thread and was going to mention anxiety but didn't get around to it.

I had severe anxiety with Sophia. It started out normal enough, or at least manageable enough, that I never felt the need to see a doctor for it. Around 9 months PP, it got really, really bad and I developed OCD because of it. I barely slept either. I started off checking S once a night to checking her 8-10 times an hour. I sometimes wouldn't make it out of her room without turning around and checking on her again. I worried about every single thing and I had daily panic attacks.

The therapist put me on zoloft but what really helped was hearing from her that I needed to let go of the things I couldn't control and learning to be more organized to handle stress. I'm a very controlling person which is hard to be when children are involved. You can't control what happens when they sleep, how others drive, etc and I was having a really hard time with that. Aside from that, things were getting really stressful at work. I was able to handle the stress when my mind wasn't preoccupied with other things but because of the anxiety, I was constantly thinking of Sophia and couldn't concentrate. I would be in the middle of a meeting thinking about whether MIL is frustrated with her and decided to suffocate her. And I would obsess about that thought throughout the entire meeting until I could finally call to check on her. It was so bad. It took a bit for me to learn to let go of what I can't control-lots of coaching myself through situations. That helped me more than meds honestly.

 

[Puppmom]

HH, I have the autism worry too! I think we get bombarded with things then it's just a matter of time before they wiggle their way into our subconscious. I think a lot of what we're all going through is *normal* but it doesn't mean that it has to be this way. It's just so hard to change things that feel beyond you.

 

[fieryred33143]

Hh I identify w/ your comment about work. I went through the same. And I was constantly searching for feedback. I'd ask my boss all the time how was I doing, was he happy with my work, could I do something better. Even if he said everything was perfect, I still didn't believe him.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

I've always been highly anxious and meditation has helped me with calmness during the day.

The following is a CD that I LOVE...

http://www.brainsync.com/shop/total-relaxation.html

It's best to use earphones with it. I have a couple other CDs by Brainsync but don't like them as much as the Total Relaxation.

I do take sleep aids for at night, though, and my dr told me not to stop taking them. When I don't have a full-night sleep I easily get sleep deprivation so I'd rather have medication than deal with that (and I've been on them for years!). (But my deprivation isn't "normal." If I'm up a few hours, I literally cannot hold a conversation!)

 

[drk]

I came across a good webpage today: http://www.pregnancy-info.net/postpartum_anxiety_and_panic.html

"Onset of the disorder may occur within the first few days after birth or come on more gradually during the first year after birth. Women who suffer from this disorder tend to exhibit the following behavior:
* Trouble concentrating and remembering things YEP
* Difficulties finishing everyday tasks
* Trouble making decisions YEP
* Difficulty relaxing
* Insomnia YEP
* Exhaustion YEP
* Feelings of extreme uneasiness for prolonged periods of time YEP
* Loss of appetite YEP
* Possible suicidal thoughts
* Anxiety/panic attacks
Signs of a panic attack include:
* Shortness of breath
* Feeling of being choked or smothered
* Chest pain or discomfort
* Heart palpitations or increased heart rate YEP
* Hot flashes or chills
* Sweating
* Trembling or shaking
* Tingling sensation
* Feeling faint, dizzy, lightheaded or unsteady
* Nausea or stomach upset YEP - this is constant
* Depersonalization (feeling removed or disoriented from the world)
* Fear of going crazy or doing something uncontrolled
* Sense of impending doom or death
At least four of these 14 symptoms will be present during a panic attack."

I don't think I've actually had a panic attack yet, but I can tick off a lot of the anxiety symptoms. The worst part right now is that I can't quite put my finger on a trigger for the insomnia/acute anxiety like I've been able to in the past. Probably it's due to weaning, but I was doing just fine until DD got sick that one night last week. After that, it kind of spiraled. It helped to have a change of scenery over the weekend, for sure.

I'm so glad to hear that smart normal people like you have suffered from this too. Well, not glad that you've suffered, but it's nice to know I'm not alone. And that some of you've found things that helped.

Pupp and HH - I've also had the autism thought, but haven't really worried about it. I think most of my worry revolves around the house, functioning at work, and being able to sleep. It doesn't help that DH goes away on business relatively often. Mum is coming to stay with me during at least next week's trip. That way, if I do feel like I need to take a sleeping pill to function at work, she'll be there to listen for K.

DH said he really started to worry about me last week after a phone call we had when he was out of town. I was tired after that night K vomited and was up part of the night and went to bed early. I called him to say goodnight, but he was hardly talking to me. Monosyllabic answers, then when I asked if he couldn't talk, he just said "no". And when I said "Why, is your girlfriend there?" (because we joke around about stuff like that, not because I think he'd cheat or has a GF), he didn't really respond. By then I'm pretty much crying because he's being so weird and not talking to me. Hung up after giving him a couple chances to say something else, and sat there in bed crying. He called back a couple minutes later to say he'd been in a restaurant with colleagues and had just been signing the credit card bill. I asked why he couldn't have just told me that and had me call back in 5 min. He'd just thought I'd called to say a 2 second good night. Anyhow, he thought I'd way overreacted to the situation, which is probably true.

HH - hugs for having to deal with anxiety/insomnia/PPD. It's just so stressful. I'm not sure if it would be much better if I were still at home. Right now, I just worry with the lack of sleep that I'll be a danger to someone at work. Never mind that I was so sleep deprived with my twice-nightly pumping for months and still functioned ok, so it's not a really justified worry. Then I feel guilty for reaching for a sleeping pill, and worry that I'll not survive without them when DH's out of town and I can't take one because I might not hear the baby. Ugh!

Charbie - I'll have to try the relaxation exercise you described. I tried holding my breath or doing deep breathing the other night when I couldn't sleep and my heart was racing, but it just didn't work. Maybe the relaxation thing would help me more .

MC - I might just have to download that and try it!

Thanks for commiserating ladies. I'm back on my domperidone at a lowish dose, and the girls are already leaking. Looks like I'll be pumping once a night for a little while longer. If that helps the hormones even out, I'm ok with it.

 

[soocool]

My DD is all grown (1, but in my mind she is still 4 and I will always worry about her. You need an outlet to purge yourself of everything you keep inside....either a good bout of crying and/or the meditation tapes. I also use what is called "Binaural Beats". This has totally relaxed me and has helped me get the sleep that seems to evade me.

Ladies, once you are in menopause you will find yourselves in the same boat again. You can read about it here and find stuff on youtube about it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binaural_beats

http://www.binauralbeatsgeek.com/binaural-beat-research.html

I think it is worth a shot and beats taking meds.