Hello everyone!First of all, thank you for reading the below. I will admit it is a stream of my thought and relatively disorganized but I assumed the experts on here could give me some advice/insight.
Okay, my dilemma - I just got engaged on Saturday (not the problem at all, I’m thrilled about this lol) and my lovely fiancé let me take the reigns on my ring. When we were talking about getting engaged, he mentioned he was overwhelmed by all the choices and wanted me to have *exactly* what I wanted, hence began me basically building my ring.
I picked the stone first - a beautiful 1.71 oval, GIA VS2, H color and then a few weeks after I found the woman we would end up using to make the setting. As she was in Dallas and we are in SF, we had to send the stone to her to mount. I mention this because a few days before I we got engaged, she posted a photo on instagram that looked eerily like my ring or what I imagined it to look like, as I never got any pictures from her, just CADs early in the design process. I texted my then boyfriend (who was keeping the ring in safe keeping and without me seeing it) to ask if that was it, and he said it wasn’t my ring.
This is where we get to the meat and bones of it - I was so RELIEVED to hear this. The moment I saw the ring, I was like, oh my gosh that center stone is yellowish! Please don’t let that be mine!
And well, it was.
Now when I first contacted our setting designer, I asked her is she was able to use lower grade melee to help the contrast between center stone and pave band not be so great. I understand now that really wasn’t going to help anything, and I am not entirely sure it was done as she assured me the melee would be selected to compliment my center stone and I never heard anything more, or as I mentioned, saw any photos.
I guess the main thing now is whenever I look at my hand indoors or in certain situations my eyes can now pick up the “warmth” of my stone. I didn’t realize I was color sensitive - we looked at both a G stone as well when purchasing this stone and I went for mine as it had better proportions - inside the store and outside in overcast SF Bay weather. I saw absolutely no warmth at the time, but then again it was unmounted. The only time I had an opportunity to observe it next to pave stones was under jewelry lights with the stone resting loose in the setting, and even then, I didn’t pick up on it.
I’m frustrated with myself because I feel I made a mistake somehow. I did SO, so much research on every little bit and felt very comfortable with my decisions prior to this - I was sure it would be the ring of my dreams! My fiancé noticed the warmth after I frantically asked him to check the ring before he proposed, but he blames it on our very warm home lighting and maybe a filter our ring designer used, although I noticed it when it was overcast outside this morning too.
I had a very specific “vision” of how I wanted my ring to look, and I was not anticipating for any warmth in my center stone/contrast between the pave stones. I feel like since the picture our designer posted (attached - she’s the one picture on the white hand) that’s the only thing I am focusing on, as it was my unintentional introduction to my ring. I am a tinkerer and perfectionist by nature, and I’ve mentioned a few times to my fiancé that I feel bad because it is a gorgeous stone and “maybe I should have just gone for a plain white gold band.” He says he wants me to be happy and embrace the imperfections - because, as he says, nothing is ever perfect. To him it is most important that we “built” the ring together (which is true, he supported my decisions and weighed in when asked.) I know he does not want to make any alterations to the ring as he feels that I have an insane eye for detail and once I tinker, the ring will never be done. His exact words were “I know you view everything in life as a project, but I would really hope you could be happy with this as it is and enjoy it.” I mentioned I feel like I failed him somehow and he said there is no way to fail when my ring wasn’t a test.
Another problem I think is that I have not really ever looked at diamonds before irl, especially ovals, so I am unfamiliar with their quirks and how they typically react/show warmth, and therefore am unable to judge if all of this is “normal.”
I am sorry everyone - I just need some reassurance and insight!
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My engagement ring is an E, VVS2 and lately i got a J, SI2 (eye clean). You know what? Ι honestly love the warmer/lower clarity stone much more than the crispy white one, even when i look at them with the one right next to the other!!
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