A little sad...no upgrade for 25th anniversary...

[ecf8503]

Wink''s new site will be up and running in T-minus 1 hour-ish! One of the things it will have on it will be a diamond carat weight to CZ carat weight to mm diameter conversion for each shape. A 2.5ct cushion diamond will not have the same WEIGHT as a CZ - so use the new conversion chart to determine the "size" to order - or better yet, call them tomorrow! The $30 price sounds about right - maybe a little more for a bigger stone - but likely still under $50. Here''s a pic of Wink''s CZ cushion (which by his own admission looks MUCH better in person than in the photo!) -

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/16/2005 8:59:20 PM
Author: MissGotRocks
There have been lots of good suggestions here - and in the end you will have to decide which of these scenarios is the best for you.

Personally, I would not buy a new mounting for the current stone. It will not accomodate another stone. . . especially a different cut without at least changing the head. While one shape or size may look OK on a ring, another stone may blow the proportions out of the water.

You could certainly find the setting of your dreams and set it with a CZ. I just don''t know that that would solve your dilemma at this point. You''ve been married for 25 years; sounds like you are looking for a diamond!

My vote would be to choose a vendor or maybe a couple of vendors that have good trade in policies. You seem to have set a budget amount for the ring; I would tell them what I had to spend and what I was looking for. Then let them do what they do best - find you the biggest and best stone for the money. At least you would have jumped into the diamond market now - the price increases are frightening! Waiting will only mean that what you could purchase today for 4K won''t be what you can purchase next Christmas for 4K. Then at some point in time if finances dictate, you can either trade up in size or go ahead with a setting. Settings go up too but I would be more concerned at the increase in diamond prices than I would with increases in setting prices. I would also find someone that was interested in selling your ring on consignment and then leave it with them. It will sell. . . the question is when and for how much. You could use that money toward an upgrade or a new setting.

Good luck - please let us know what you decide. Maybe your hubby will appreciate the fact that you are willing to consider different options to help make this a reality. While none of knows your family or financial situation, I would have to think that you wouldn''t want to do this if it were totally out of the question from a financial standpoint. After 25 years and 9 kids, I would think you deserve a little sparkly!

Thank you SO much for your thoughtful words and considerations. Of course I want a diamond, but with 2 kids in orthodontia now, 2 more that will need it soon--1 for sure by the end of next summer, a wedding of my eldest son next May, and paying down some debt--not alot, but some(remember, my hubby is VERY conscientious and is an accountant and NOT comfortable with what we cannot get a leash on, which is a good trait), I am trying to be real.
Quite honestly, I told him he is more than blessed he has me for his wife. Not meaning to sound haughty or arrogant, I am very patient and I am not a financial drain to him like some wives around us we know are. I like nice things, I won''t lie, but I am not about to buy what I cannot afford to pay for--even on credit. I have nice handbags but if I use the credit card--and I have--I pay it off and soon to avoid interest from building.
He has no clue of how blessed he really is and he never will. I gave him 9 kids. Now, I will be honest, I planned on 4. So did he. God gave us a bonus kid...I guess. Three of our kids were "pill babies" and that is the honest truth. I love them but it is work and that is no fibbing. They are good and wholesome kids and I am graced by God with that. Four of them are in college and one will graduate this year.
My husband just DOES NOT GET IT....He sees no value and no merit in purchasing a diamond based on affordability. Even if the $ was there, I KNOW him...He would say for us to use that money for something for the house or for one of the businesses. He jokes around a bit saying that when a new business that he is getting ready to launch gets underway, he will buy me the biggest, honker of a rock I have ever seen.
Based on what happened yesterday, I plan to hold him to that little pledge of his...and I intend on reminding him...

Thanks for your thoughts...and support

 

[Sundial]

So sorry to hear that your 25th anniversary ring upgrade isn''t working out so well Deanna! You have received some good ideas here, just give it some time and review all your options before you make a decision. Personally I think the idea of a CZ to be upgraded to the real thing later is a terrific suggestion.

 

[Kaleigh]

Yummm. I can''t wait for his new site to be up and running!!!

 

[decodelighted]

If the cz plan really speaks to you == it sounds like a good option for now. (Though I think the 2.5ct one might be "pushing it" - ya don''t want the ol'' accountant to have a heart attack do ya!)

Personally, I kinda hope you find a way to get the $4K GOG 1.2? cushion or the like. After having a .75 for so long, that''s gonna seem huge to you! And in a solitare setting .. very very close to the budget.

Prices are only going up ... if its a short term cash crunch ... that''s one thing, but if you''re going to have to pry him lose all over again a year from now - stop the drama and say "come to mama"!

 

[Patty]

My round CZ from Wink was something like $27. It is a 2 carat equivalent. I went with the "RG white" CZ that Wink carries. It is comparable to an "H" colored diamond. I think the slight hint of color makes it look more realistic.

You can check out Wink''s site or you can just pick up the phone tomorrow and talk to him or Shelia, his right hand woman (otherwise known as "she who must be obeyed."

) Wink is a wonderful man and I''m sure he''d be thrilled to help you with this.

As for the stone size that you go with, just remember that if you go REALLY big, it will take you that much longer to be able to replace the CZ with the real deal, lol. Of course, you may just stick with the CZ once you see it!

 

[ecf8503]

Have you seen the Show Me Your Fakes thread? Lots of Wink fans there...

I just got some 5mm (0.5ct equivalent) studs from him and they are quite nice!

 

[Jelly]

hi Deanne,

I''ve been following your previous threads and I''m sad to hear that your husband was against the upgrade. I''m sorry that your feelings were hurt by the jeweler...They can be so insensitive!!!

Good luck in finding a great CZ. Keep us updated on what you decide!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/16/2005 10:41:18 PM
Author: baltneu
I have a different thought on your post..........

I re-read your post and your husband is not depriving you because he is being mean, or insensitive, or stubborn, he told you that he CANNOT afford it right now. You said you have lots of debt, do you want more? If you want to max out a credit card or two then go ahead, but he does not want to, atleast right now.

Sorry, I do not feel sorry for you. You said you have 9 wonderful children, I think there atleast a million Americans who would trade places with you in a minute.

I appreciate you responding to my situation, baltneau...I really do. Afterall, it IS a public forum. I was upfront and admitted that we have some debt, how much--I did not feel the need to disclose for privacy reasons. FYI, it is not horrendous or unsurmountable...it is just the kind that makes you re-evaluate what you are going to purchase for awhile. As far as "maxing out a credit card or two..." that isn''t going to happen...not now or ever. My husband and I are careful and conscientious consumers and have 1 cc for each business and 1 cc that is for personal use. That is it. If I do not have cash, I don''t buy it and that works for us. It is not an easy route and takes planning, but it works. Now, what I just disclosed to you, I didn''t need to, but I have nothing to hide, baltneau.

You have no need to feel sorry for me. I felt sad for me and that was plenty enough. Actually, when I started this thread it was with the sheer intent of not so much having people feel sorry for me but to help me see other angles or other ideas to the situation. That goal has been met and I am so very grateful.

I agree with you on my family issue, too. I AM blessed to have what I have. Sometimes it doesn''t feel that way, but when I hear of others struggle to become parents, I rethink my position. My husband and I know a dear couple who had the blessing of becoming a family through adoption of a new baby daughter just 3 weeks ago. We went to their welcome baby party and I was so moved at their newfound status and the tenderness of it all.
Again, thank you for your post and I am not offended... I appreciate you and your view.

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/16/2005 11:01:58 PM
Author: decodelighted
If the cz plan really speaks to you == it sounds like a good option for now. (Though I think the 2.5ct one might be ''pushing it'' - ya don''t want the ol'' accountant to have a heart attack do ya!)

Personally, I kinda hope you find a way to get the $4K GOG 1.2? cushion or the like. After having a .75 for so long, that''s gonna seem huge to you! And in a solitare setting .. very very close to the budget.

Prices are only going up ... if its a short term cash crunch ... that''s one thing, but if you''re going to have to pry him lose all over again a year from now - stop the drama and say ''come to mama''!

Hi Deco!
Actually, I am not sure about the whole "2.5 carat CZ" thing...I was just having a bit of fun with the whole possibility, but 2 carats is not out of the woods...maybe...

Nothing is for sure. I would NOT turn a real cushion down of ANY size and that''s for sure. I will put the GOG website on the screen and present it to my husband and see how he feels about it. I don''t want him to feel like I am doing anything he feels ill at ease over.

You also bring alot of sense to this reality with the cost of diamonds on the uprise...It would give me something to play with in the trade up department...oooooh, I just don''t know!!!

 

[DonaBella]

Just thought I would share a little update with all of you...

I shared with my hubby a few of the ideas that some of you have generously mentioned: 1) getting a slightly smaller cushion cut stone and a simple setting for now with the intent to trade up in the very near future, 2) getting the dream ring setting and a CZ the size that we intend to purchase an actual cushion cut stone when we have more plentiful funds.

He was very impressed and actually spent time with me at the computer looking at engagementringsdirect.com''s website at their cushion cut listing and we found some premium cut and very good cut stones within our reach costwise and he told me to call them! Can you believe that?

I also mentioned what several of you said that by getting something moderate in size now, but bigger than my princess cut, we would have something to trade up with later and lessen our costs too. He is a rational guy and thought that made sense. He jut wants to hear what Good old Gold and Engagement Rings Direct have to say now.

I know its early in the game, but who knows? I could still end up with a bit of cushion cut sparkly yet...

Just thought I would share that with you...

Things still are in the air...

 

[ello]

I''m so happy for you - your husband sounds like a wonderful man. keep us posted!

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 10/17/2005 3:18:01 AM
Author: DeannaBana


I shared with my hubby a few of the ideas that some of you have generously mentioned: 1) getting a slightly smaller cushion cut stone and a simple setting for now with the intent to trade up in the very near future, 2) getting the dream ring setting and a CZ the size that we intend to purchase an actual cushion cut stone when we have more plentiful funds.


He was very impressed and actually spent time with me at the computer looking at engagementringsdirect.com''s website at their cushion cut listing and we found some premium cut and very good cut stones within our reach costwise and he told me to call them! Can you believe that?

I also mentioned what several of you said that by getting something moderate in size now, but bigger than my princess cut, we would have something to trade up with later and lessen our costs too. He is a rational guy and thought that made sense. He jut wants to hear what Good old Gold and Engagement Rings Direct have to say now.

That''s wonderful Deanna. I really like the idea of getting the stone you can afford now in a simple setting and then upgrading your stone and setting down the road. Sounds like hubby is supportive and willing to work with you.

 

[lumpkin]

Deanna,

Keep in mind that most vendors don't have a 100% trade in policy. For instance, where I purchased my diamond, I get credit for 80% of what I paid for it if I trade it in. 20% of what I paid would be gone. When you and hubby are crunching those numbers, keep in mind whatever percent the vendor you are looking at will give you credit for. As the prices of diamonds goes up, my 80% shrinks in terms of what it will buy. It may be more profitable to set up a fund and save, but maybe not depending on the circumstances.

 

[baltneu]

Good luck and I hope for a happy resolution

 

[moremoremore]

Perhaps a bit small for its size, but this 1.2 H Si2 cushion on GOG has always made me look twice...maybe he could give you an upgrade policy on it...It's $4,200 which is a steal if you ask me.

http://www.goodoldgold.com/cushion_1_21ct_h_si2.htm

edite* I see that it has been mentioned already...!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 9:58:10 AM
Author: moremoremore
Perhaps a bit small for its size, but this 1.2 H Si2 cushion on GOG has always made me look twice...maybe he could give you an upgrade policy on it...It''s $4,200 which is a steal if you ask me.

http://www.goodoldgold.com/cushion_1_21ct_h_si2.htm

Good morning from the West Coast...

I did see this beauty...I actually plan on calling on it after I get my kids out the door. It''s a tiny bit over our budget by $200 but I would be willing to put her in a WG solitaire temp setting for now for the opportunity of the rock. I also noticed some great deals at engagementringsdirect.com I want to follow up on. If I can tell both places my budget and stay within it, it would make hubby happy and me, too.

It''s nice to have you chime in, mmm...

 

[pebbles]

I''m glad you are looking at getting the smaller stone now with a simple setting.

The reason I say that is because....and this is in no way criticizing anyone that does this; it is just my personal feelings...I went the route a few years back of getting a CZ in the size that I eventually wanted to get with the idea of saving for the real thing. The cz I got was a 1.25ct equiv. round. It was very pretty, but...I felt like a total fake wearing it. My hubby loved it, and it kind of ticked me off because he was thinking then he never had to buy me a real stone! He wanted me to tell everyone it was real. I just couldn''t do it. I only wore it a few times and after all the oooohs, and aaaahs, from my family and friends, I put it away. I decided I would rather have something real and smaller than bigger and fake. I eventually did get a real stone (not a 1.25ct but smaller) and had to wait longer than I had wanted to, but it was for me totally worth it. Will I ever trade this one up? At this point, I don''t feel like I need to.

Good luck and can''t wait to hear what you decide!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 9:58:10 AM
Author: moremoremore
Perhaps a bit small for its size, but this 1.2 H Si2 cushion on GOG has always made me look twice...maybe he could give you an upgrade policy on it...It''s $4,200 which is a steal if you ask me.

http://www.goodoldgold.com/cushion_1_21ct_h_si2.htm

edite* I see that it has been mentioned already...!

Do you agree that perhaps buying a slightly smaller cushion now then is a smarter alternative so I have something to bargain with perhaps later next year or whenever?

Is the CZ route one that you personally think I should lean towards and get thinking of the dream ring setting now?

Just wondered what YOU thought? You have been very candid and helpful with me in the recent past and I value your thoughts, mmm...

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 10:04:47 AM
Author: pebbles
I''m glad you are looking at getting the smaller stone now with a simple setting.

The reason I say that is because....and this is in no way criticizing anyone that does this; it is just my personal feelings...I went the route a few years back of getting a CZ in the size that I eventually wanted to get with the idea of saving for the real thing. The cz I got was a 1.25ct equiv. round. It was very pretty, but...I felt like a total fake wearing it. My hubby loved it, and it kind of ticked me off because he was thinking then he never had to buy me a real stone! He wanted me to tell everyone it was real. I just couldn''t do it. I only wore it a few times and after all the oooohs, and aaaahs, from my family and friends, I put it away. I decided I would rather have something real and smaller than bigger and fake. I eventually did get a real stone (not a 1.25ct but smaller) and had to wait longer than I had wanted to, but it was for me totally worth it. Will I ever trade this one up? At this point, I don''t feel like I need to.

Good luck and can''t wait to hear what you decide!

Good point, Pebbles...
I feel like you were just in my brain! I am not one to "pull a fast one" per se for the sake of making people believe I am doing one thing or having one thing when in fact I am not. Like my kids always say, "mom, you just can''t fib for nothing". I like the idea of the well made cz for a little while IF it is motivating to get a savings plan going for the real mccoy, but I have a sneaky suspicion my hubby might procrastinate his plan--not intentionally--but it might happen cuz 3/4 of what I would want is in the bag: the dream setting is bought and the cz would be in place.
Personally, I would be happy, as I have mentioned in earlier replies, with a smaller cushion to get started and work my way up to the size I felt comfortable with, around 1.75 to a 2.0 carat at the max. I am glad others have mentioned about the 80% trade up policy that most companies have. That is also good info. I had already read that, but it never hurts to be reminded, especially when one is considering making a major purchase like this.
Now, I just need to get those darn kids to school so I can focus on diamond talk with GOG and Engagement rings direct!

Wish me luck! Remember, hubby gave his thumbs up on this part of things!

 

[moremoremore]

Deanna- Is your dream setting very intricate and would it need to be custom made to fit the stone? If so, then getting the setting would be a waste b/c changes of finding a cushion that would exactly fit would be pretty impossible...

I also have issues with czs. I think they are SO much fun and fabulous, but when it comes to an e-ring, I''m really not a fan...I totally totally understand the pressures that are placed on newly engaged couples to have diamonds, so in that case I understand...but I just don''t know if it feels the same...it doesn''t feel the same to me anyway...I''d rather have a plain band...

If it were me, I''d get what I could now LOL...I''m impatient...I would get a 100% trade up stone and work my way up to bliss! I''ve always been impressed with that GOG stone...and if that''s in the budget, I''d take a look at it...Jon might give you a 100% upgrade on it b/c it has such awesome bscope results for a fancy... I''d put it in a cheap white gold setting and just save my lunch money til my dream stone comes along!!!!!!!!!!

 

[koko]

Deanna, I''m so glad you & hubby are getting closer to being on the same page!! Men tend to be very practical and my husband also saw no logical reason to invest in a diamond when we needed so many other things. However, when he came to realize how important is was to me, he softened. When I did wear the CZ I had bought for myself, I never told anyone it was real. I would always say it was my fun, "dream" diamond until I could get the real thing....and I would alternate wearing that with my original yellow gold set, to match the other jewelry I was wearing that day. I think it embarrased him somewhat to know that I was wearing a CZ and telling people it was not real, because he came off looking like a real "cheap skate", when in actuality he''s a very loving & sensitive husband. If you do get your dream setting with a temp. CZ I''ll bet it won''t be long until he gets you the "real thing...." Good Luck & have fun with the search (just let him take the lead, since it''s a gift, and I''ll bet he won''t disappoint you).....

 

[koko]

DH can consider himself lucky that you''re not asking for a 9 carat eternity band (one for each child) Ha, Ha!!

 

[Kaleigh]

I''m so glad to hear the good news Deanna!!! Please let us know what GOG has to say. That is a beautiful cushion indeed. I am in love with cushions right now, Yummmm.

 

[partgypsy]

I sympathize with your situation. As you have raised 9 children I''m sure you are resourceful and a good problem solver, and it looks like what is kicking into gear. My husband also does not see the reason for spending money on jewelry, he only does it because it makes me happy (and that is a good enough reason!)
I would also vote on getting a smaller, good quality diamond of your desires, ideally with a vendor that does upgrades. I love Winfield''s interlaps, but at your stage in the game, I think what you really want is a diamond, correct?
I don''t think it''s worthwhile getting an expensive setting without the stone. As others have mentioned resetting another stone into the setting can be problematic, or just not look right.
Good luck with the search!
And despite what the jewelers said, although you won''t get what you expected, you probably can get some money from your old ring, possibly through consignment or the classifieds. If you have any cert on the stones that will help selling them.

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 10:43:27 AM
Author: moremoremore
Deanna- Is your dream setting very intricate and would it need to be custom made to fit the stone? If so, then getting the setting would be a waste b/c changes of finding a cushion that would exactly fit would be pretty impossible...

I also have issues with czs. I think they are SO much fun and fabulous, but when it comes to an e-ring, I''m really not a fan...I totally totally understand the pressures that are placed on newly engaged couples to have diamonds, so in that case I understand...but I just don''t know if it feels the same...it doesn''t feel the same to me anyway...I''d rather have a plain band...

If it were me, I''d get what I could now LOL...I''m impatient...I would get a 100% trade up stone and work my way up to bliss! I''ve always been impressed with that GOG stone...and if that''s in the budget, I''d take a look at it...Jon might give you a 100% upgrade on it b/c it has such awesome bscope results for a fancy... I''d put it in a cheap white gold setting and just save my lunch money til my dream stone comes along!!!!!!!!!!

So sorry that I haven''t been able to respond quicker...life goes on...regarding my "dream setting"...you bring up an excellent point. Intricate? I hadn''t really thought about that, but I love a Varna setting I found in a magazine and I also like a setting I found on the Union Diamond website so I guess it would be a combination of the aspects of both of those--the engraving by hand, the platinum, the milgraining--ooh--the side diamonds in either pave or prong set(haven''t decided!) just a little to set of the center stone to be the star. You may have a point.

I DO want the real McCoy--a cushion cut diamond, even if it has to be a smaller carat for now until we can afford the size I ideally want later. An excellent cut now is a step, a healthy step in the right direction for my ultimate goal. The CZ would be nice, but...

On to the latest...I called Good Old Gold and silly me, I failed to see that they are closed on Monday so I will call them back on Tuesday, but I left a msg as well. I did call Mark at Engagement rings direct and he was so nice. He was straight with me and gave me some great points to consider. He asked me if I prefered rectangular cushions more than pillowy ones etc. and asked me to check Reena''s ring and then call him back later. I guess there is alot of Jewish holidays going on in NY(I''m in Riverside, CA) so he told me that it might take him a little while to find me what he wants to find me once we narrow things a bit. I am more concerned about finding the right stone than hurrying.

I am more naturally drawn to the rectangular cut cushion so I am thrilled he can help me with this. I will still check with GOG cuz I need to keep my options open ...right? Obviously, if things move quicker and seem better with one versus the other, I will stay with that person and company. Am I doing right to do it this way? I am SO excited to be "in the game" finally!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 12:26:06 PM
Author: koko
Deanna, I''m so glad you & hubby are getting closer to being on the same page!! Men tend to be very practical and my husband also saw no logical reason to invest in a diamond when we needed so many other things. However, when he came to realize how important is was to me, he softened. When I did wear the CZ I had bought for myself, I never told anyone it was real. I would always say it was my fun, ''dream'' diamond until I could get the real thing....and I would alternate wearing that with my original yellow gold set, to match the other jewelry I was wearing that day. I think it embarrased him somewhat to know that I was wearing a CZ and telling people it was not real, because he came off looking like a real ''cheap skate'', when in actuality he''s a very loving & sensitive husband. If you do get your dream setting with a temp. CZ I''ll bet it won''t be long until he gets you the ''real thing....'' Good Luck & have fun with the search (just let him take the lead, since it''s a gift, and I''ll bet he won''t disappoint you).....

Thanks koko...
It is good for us, too. It also helps that last night he got word that a new client wants him to work for them 2 days a week so that means more $ coming in. My hubby is an accountant by degreee, but his specialty is computer software installations and recently leads had kind of dried up and that added pressure to things. After getting this late evening phone call and me reading to him some of the replies and ideas from PS, he was more willing to consider options. BTW, Chris wouldn''t be embarrassed if I had a CZ instead of a diamond and he told me so. He thought it would fool alot of folks who would believe its real who are always wondering how much $ he makes cuz of our big family. He drives a BMW that is previously used and when he drove that to a client''s office they ribbed him a bit saying that maybe they over paid him due to the car he drove. That didn''t set well with him. He is a very careful consumer and doesn''t buy if he doesn''t need it. Believe me. He bought me athletic shoes for a Valentine''s Day b4 we were married and a sweet cute card and then a nice dinner. My roommate told me that she knew he was sensible even then. Chris is the type of guy that you have to tell him what you want for your birthday, Christmas, Mother''s Day and anniversaries and then make sure and tell one of your kids that will remind him when that holiday comes, cuz he will forget cuz he is so busy.

Chris is a great guy who is very logical and not emotionally attached to any ONE thing. He loves his family, his wife...not things. He takes trips with me or the kids to have experiences and memories. That is my guy. I don''t want you folks to get the wrong impression of him. He does not mean to be dense about me or my wants. He''s a guy and can''t see value in a rock on a ring...that''s all. I am hoping to crack open a tiny little ray of knowledge that he can grasp onto so he can appreciate it at least for my benefit...that''s all.

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 12:28:53 PM
Author: koko
DH can consider himself lucky that you''re not asking for a 9 carat eternity band (one for each child) Ha, Ha!!

Actually, I had that suggested to me if I went for a solitaire setting for the wedding band...it''s funny you mentioned that!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 10/17/2005 12:31:22 PM
Author: kaleigh
I''m so glad to hear the good news Deanna!!! Please let us know what GOG has to say. That is a beautiful cushion indeed. I am in love with cushions right now, Yummmm.

Good Day Kaleigh!

You know, I was so pumped and excited to call GOG that I didn''t see on the website where it clearly says that they are closed on Mondays, so I left them a message. I plan to call tomorrow.

I did get a recommendation to call engagementringsdirect.com and I did. I talked to Mark Tunowsky(?) and had a great conversation. Lots to think about, but it was also exciting...

 

[moremoremore]

Mark is awesome!!! Only thing I want to mention is that if you plan on definitely upgrading...maybe a couple of times, keep in mind his new 70% upgrade policy...Although maybe you guys can work something out. he''s very good like that!