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Your US President would UNDERSTAND

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somethingshiny

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2007
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6,746
I thought these were funny and THEN I started thinking that OBAMA would think they''re funny! So, naturally, I chose to share.

Jeff Foxworthy on Illinois :

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Illinois.

If someone in a store offers you assistance & they don''t work there, you might live in Illinois.

If your dad''s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Illinois.

If you have ever worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Illinois.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Illinois.

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Illinois.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Illinoisan WHEN:

1. Vacation means going north or south on I-55 for the weekend.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from heat to AC in the same day and back again.

5. You drive 65 mph through a raging blizzard, without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings)

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and know how to use them.

9. You design your kid''s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with
snow.

11. You know all 5 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, road
construction, & It''s Hot.

12. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to a blue
spruce.

13. ''Down south '' means Missouri .

14. A brat is something you eat.

15. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.

16. You go out to a tailgate party every Friday.

17. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

18. You find 0 degrees a ''little chilly.''

19. You know the difference between corn and soy beans at a glance.

20. You do not consider Chicago to be a part of Illinois.

21. A ''hill'' is any landmass higher than 20 feet above sea level

22. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your
Illinois friends. What''s not to understand?
>
 

Italiahaircolor

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 16, 2007
Messages
5,184
hahaha, I am from IL and I know a good 75% of those.
 

Ellen

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 13, 2006
Messages
24,433
Date: 1/24/2009 1:33:54 PM
Author:somethingshiny
I thought these were funny and THEN I started thinking that OBAMA would think they're funny! So, naturally, I chose to share.

Jeff Foxworthy on Illinois :

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Illinois.

If someone in a store offers you assistance & they don't work there, you might live in Illinois.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Illinois.

If you have ever worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Illinois.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Illinois.

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Illinois.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Illinoisan WHEN:

1. Vacation means going north or south on I-55 for the weekend.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from heat to AC in the same day and back again.

5. You drive 65 mph through a raging blizzard, without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings)

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and know how to use them.

9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with
snow.

11. You know all 5 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, road
construction, & It's Hot.

12. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to a blue
spruce.

13. 'Down south ' means Missouri .

14. A brat is something you eat.

15. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.

16. You go out to a tailgate party every Friday.

17. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

18. You find 0 degrees a 'little chilly.'

19. You know the difference between corn and soy beans at a glance.

20. You do not consider Chicago to be a part of Illinois.

21. A 'hill' is any landmass higher than 20 feet above sea level

22. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your
Illinois friends. What's not to understand?
>
lol.gif


From a fellow Illinoisan, so true on so many. Especially the highlight, though in my town, I'm pretty certain bars win.
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Jeff Foxworthy rocks!
 

platinumrock

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2005
Messages
2,262
HAHA...

Thanks for the laughs.
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Tuckins1

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 13, 2008
Messages
8,614
Lol... I''m not from Illinois, but i''m from Illinois''s younger cousin to the north... Michigan. There are definitely some similarities!
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Thanks for the chuckle!
 

strmrdr

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 1, 2003
Messages
23,295
sounds about right except it is wish we could give Chicago to Indiana.
 

AprilBaby

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 17, 2008
Messages
13,277
I am TOTALLY from Illinois!
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