Your other half's view on diamonds and rings?

[alongcat]

So I just thought it might be fun to have a thread about how our respective others' feel about e rings, diamonds etc.

Quick background: I am pretty new to the world of diamonds and had never before thought of myself as the kind of girl who'd want a diamond e ring. I thought my wants were more unconventional and I felt a little smug about it But then I saw some photos online of visible arrows in H&A cuts and THEN I was completed hooked by the photos Sarah Ludwig posted of her (huge) BGD e ring - the way the photographer captured the play of light in it is purely magical (this is the link for anyone else who wants to be reminded of why a diamond - with an amazing cut - is the most beautiful gemstone in the world... preaching to the converted, I know: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/thank-you-brian-gavin-im-in-love.199562/ ) and I thought if I could own anything close to that beautiful (if never that big unless I win the lottery or a distant hitherto unknown relative leaves me a crazy sum of money...) then I would be very lucky indeed. I had seen the light, literally.

My FI is not from the kind of background where engagement equals a diamond ring. Not because he is not a generous guy because he is - to a fault - but because he never even thought along those lines (and neither did I, but for different reasons, because in my background a diamond is pretty standard, though not in the US sizes - you guys have huge diamonds, 1ct seems standard or less than?). He is fiercely non-materialistic (that in itself is a rare gem in this world) and free-spirited. Luckily for me he also wants more than anything to make me happy, but it still came as a bit of a shock to him when I gently announced I wanted a diamond e ring of around .75ct (initially I had a sim which had also been my choice). That said, now he's seen my new ring he is blown away and is beginning to see the light - he isn't just pleased that he's made me happy, but he feels proud that he's got it for me as it is so obviously a cracker of a ring

I was also shocked that he knew what an eternity ring was - we were talking about e rings and he mentioned something about eternity rings. 'How do you even know there IS such a thing?!' I asked and his reply was pretty priceless: 'It's a sweetener, isn't it? You might not have paid your woman enough attention recently, your 5 year anniversary is coming up - there you go, have an eternity ring!' Maybe it's more like us women make them THINK they haven't done enough recently, and so we can start dropping hints about eternity rings!

Anyway, I would love to know what others' partners are like in this respect and also how YOU got into diamonds. And how bad is it to get really hooked?

 

[Queenie60]

I have loved diamonds since I can remember! My husband is not into jewelry and thinks it's over rated. However, he knows that it makes me very happy - so there you have it. Fortunately we can afford a bobble here and there. I have an annual "jewelry allowance" that I can spend however I wish and he doesn't mind it at all. This was something put into place by him a few years back, simply because he wants me to be happy. I certainly blow through that and then some! I don't only spend on diamonds, also love pearls! That's my story but then again, we've been married for 27 years and are in our 50's.

 

[NOYFB]

My DH understands and appreciates my love for diamonds and jewelry. I show him pictures all the time and he'll give an honest opinion. He's also given me some very nice, very thoughtful gifts through the years, including a jewelry box to house them all. In fact, it was HIS idea for me to upgrade my diamond 7 years ago. He called me one day at work and said "I think you need a bigger diamond." and I was like "Who are you and what did you do with my husband?" Prior to my now e-ring, I was sporting a low quality maul stone and had always just dreamed of a bigger/better diamond, never thinking it would actually happen. So yea, he gets it.

 

[tyty333]

My DH accepts that they make me happy and knows that I enjoy them but that's about it. When I told him I was going to reset my
e-ring he looked a little shocked (like "how could you"). I explained a few things to him and he seemed like he accepted it or just
figured I was going to do what I wanted anyway . I dont talk to him much about jewelry because he gets the look that I
get when he starts talking about golf (eyes roll to the back of the head). I try to feign interest but I just cant do it anymore. I
think he feels the same way. I'm ok with us each having our own hobbies.

 

[monarch64]

When I met him he had a bunch of colored stones, several diamonds, bench equipment, and a tray full of finished pieces. "As a hobby."

 

[Dancing Fire]

My wife loves diamonds but does not wanna pay for it!..

 

[lambskin]

He does not understand the fascination, but he goes along for the ride and gets enjoyment from seeing me happy.

 

[MissGotRocks]

My husband can appreciate a beautiful diamond and certainly understands my love for them. It wouldn't be his choice of things to buy for himself but he has his own interests and hobbies that don't particularly move me either. We try to listen and understand each other's interests while openly admitting that it wouldn't be each other's first love. I guess it is a mutual respect society here!

 

[PintoBean]

My husband he's an . He absolutely subscribes to happy wife, happy life! he used to wonder why I wanted jewelry when I wouldn't wear it. He's stopped asking and I think that the love bracelet was the best purchase he ever made as a gift for me bc its on 24/7

He trusts that whatever I covet, I will do my research and get that market survey done to make sure I get the most bang for the buck.

He does feel bad that he doesn't pick out the diamonds - it's a twin thing... His brother picked out my evil sister in laws rings. But guess what? He married a crazy control freak who loves the thrill of the hunt! I do brief him while I'm searching, but sometimes it's information overload for him lolol.

 

[packrat]

He cares not one whit.

But he likes me to be happy so he will look at things I ask him to or listen to me talk about things.

 

[stracci2000]

My DH was always a jewelry wearin' guy.
He has several sterling cuff bracelets and many sterling rings, most of which I made for him.
He's got a pierced ear, with a .40 diamond stud. Of course I bought that diamond for him!
He also has an awesome yellow gold ring with a .75 VVS2 G-color OEC diamond. He wears this when we go out.

So he "gets" my jewelry obsession.

 

[arkieb1]

Mine paid for a start in a totally different career, one he loves by cutting gemstones. So he sees everything, diamonds gemstones the lot as rocks with good, great and amazing cuts and that is about all. When I talk about diamonds and gemstones his eyes tend to glaze over...

 

[Snowdrop13]

Lots of lovely partners being described on this thread! My DH is happy for me to spend my own money on jewellery and often encourages me (probably a bad thing, right?). He is also very interested (or at least pretends to be) when I have a piece in mind and am obsessing about it. I am slightly worried that he's just softening me up for his long planned purchase of a very expensive camera/lens, though! He doesn't spend any money at all on himself so it maybe just about time for that

 

[missy]

I appreciate all the wonderful dhs (and SOs) out there who are supportive of their partners interests and choices even if they don't necessarily get it.

My dh is very supportive of my bling obsession and very generous in wanting me to purchase and enjoy bling. I am usually the one to say whoa that is too much. Though he generally convinces me to get it. He is the ultimate bling enabler. Though bling is is not his personal thing he gets that it is mine and supports my bling hobby.

 

[ame]

Yknow, he's always had a very "they are worth literally nothing" view about them. He knows I love them, he knows that I KNOW they're literally little rocks literally worth nothing that one cartel has control over and has artificially price-fixed, so he basically just rolls his eyes and shuts his piehole. He is the reason I got educated though. He's supportive of my "desires" because he knows I am not going to just buy something to buy something. I am a lunatic (I could really stop this sentence here) about researching, planning, plotting, etc. I have my ducks in a row before I even go to him. I have all or most of the funds in line before I even approach him about it. But ironically, my necklace was all him. Rather, setting the rubies was all him. He brought it up a few times, and *I* am the one that dragged my feet. I just could not decide how I wanted to set them. I love my necklace, but as with all of my items, I just never wear anything. I look at it lovingly, and that's about it. lol

He appreciates the antiques, himself. He has no desire to own or wear anything himself though.

 

[m-2-b]

His motto now is "Happy wife = happy life."

 

[missy]

His motto now is "Happy wife = happy life."

Such an amazingly simple and clear lesson and yet it amazes me how many men still don't "get" it.

 

[Laila619]

This is going to sound dumb, but I think he is irritated by them now, because he knows that rings have caused me a lot of angst and agita over the years. Still, he wants me to be happy, so he doesn't mind my buying and returning/selling. Over the years, he has taken me to many jewelry stores and listened to my ring hunting stories and/or patiently looked at pictures of settings with me and given me his opinion. He is a saint.

I don't think he knew much about diamonds, but he happily bought me one before he proposed, because he thought I would want a diamond e-ring.

 

[chrono]

He doesn't care much about it but he is aware of my fascination with all things gems. He has his hobbies and toys and I have my own hobbies and toys.

 

[madelise]

He's Persian. I scored.

 

[azstonie]

He likes me to be happy, so he doesn't judge me too hard about it but he has said at least once:

"How many rings can you wear?"

To which I responded by running in to my jewel box and putting quite a few rings on each and every finger, loaded on all my bracelets, watches and necklaces and ran back out to answer him

DH is a geologist by education and trade so he finds the inflation that occurs in the *diamond* portion of the jewelry biz to be worse than highway robbery. As the years have gone by and I've bought diamonds and B&M already-made jewelry, and then had plenty of custom jewel projects, I've acquired some buyer's remorse and a whole lot of buyer's resistance. I attended the Tucson Show, the *wholesale* show and I saw the price the trade starts their buying negotiations with and that pretty much ruined me for retail. Don't get me wrong, I completely understand making a profit, supporting oneself and family, etc. I just like my relationships to be reciprocal, meaning I don't get mugged in terms of price. Just slapped around a little bit hahaha.

 

[marcy]

My DH doesn't get my excitement over diamonds but likes unique colored gems. He has listened to me so much babble on about quality, color, cut that he is pretty picky and observant at picking out loose stones.

He has thing for watches so he holds his own on putting dents in our checking account.

 

[AprilBaby]

He gets it and he is picking up the lingo. He is also an April Baby.

 

[pearaffair]

He likes me to be happy, so he doesn't judge me too hard about it but he has said at least once:

"How many rings can you wear?"

To which I responded by running in to my jewel box and putting quite a few rings on each and every finger, loaded on all my bracelets, watches and necklaces and ran back out to answer him

DH is a geologist by education and trade so he finds the inflation that occurs in the *diamond* portion of the jewelry biz to be worse than highway robbery. As the years have gone by and I've bought diamonds and B&M already-made jewelry, and then had plenty of custom jewel projects, I've acquired some buyer's remorse and a whole lot of buyer's resistance. I attended the Tucson Show, the *wholesale* show and I saw the price the trade starts their buying negotiations with and that pretty much ruined me for retail. Don't get me wrong, I completely understand making a profit, supporting oneself and family, etc. I just like my relationships to be reciprocal, meaning I don't get mugged in terms of price. Just slapped around a little bit hahaha.

Omg can ANYONE go to the Tucson wholesale show???

My DH doesn't care one whit for jewellery. Luckily he cares a great deal about my happiness!!!!!!

 

[jordyonbass]

Loves rings, not a fan of diamonds.

We're colored stone fans

 

[mochiko42]

He likes me to be happy, so he doesn't judge me too hard about it but he has said at least once:

"How many rings can you wear?"

To which I responded by running in to my jewel box and putting quite a few rings on each and every finger, loaded on all my bracelets, watches and necklaces and ran back out to answer him

DH is a geologist by education and trade so he finds the inflation that occurs in the *diamond* portion of the jewelry biz to be worse than highway robbery. As the years have gone by and I've bought diamonds and B&M already-made jewelry, and then had plenty of custom jewel projects, I've acquired some buyer's remorse and a whole lot of buyer's resistance. I attended the Tucson Show, the *wholesale* show and I saw the price the trade starts their buying negotiations with and that pretty much ruined me for retail. Don't get me wrong, I completely understand making a profit, supporting oneself and family, etc. I just like my relationships to be reciprocal, meaning I don't get mugged in terms of price. Just slapped around a little bit hahaha.

I go to the HK trade shows and seeing diamonds bagged in ziploc bags and south sea pearls in plastic colanders (the same ones that they use for fruit and veg in the street markets here), it really gave me a new perspective on the definition of "luxury"..

 

[Amber St. Clare]

He doesn't care about jewelry AT ALL. We have been married for almost 33 years now and has had his wedding ring on the whole time--when he had his surgery it was taped over for security. It has literally grown with his finger and I don't think he could take it off if he had to. Kinda of gross, IMO.

He understands and accepts for the most part my love/obsession and seldom, if ever has really given m a hard time about it.

 

[jordyonbass]

He doesn't care about jewelry AT ALL. We have been married for almost 33 years now and has had his wedding ring on the whole time--when he had his surgery it was taped over for security. It has literally grown with his finger and I don't think he could take it off if he had to. Kinda of gross, IMO.

He understands and accepts for the most part my love/obsession and seldom, if ever has really given m a hard time about it.

Does he have his own interests and hobbies? If so then he probably understands the passion but not the object of it.

I feel kinda lucky that we are both into gemstones as in my view it's another hobby that costs us money, but when you see typically which person in a relationship likes them then maybe it's my wife who is lucky here that her husband wants to cut stones for her to turn into jewellery

 

[Amber St. Clare]

He doesn't care about jewelry AT ALL. We have been married for almost 33 years now and has had his wedding ring on the whole time--when he had his surgery it was taped over for security. It has literally grown with his finger and I don't think he could take it off if he had to. Kinda of gross, IMO.

He understands and accepts for the most part my love/obsession and seldom, if ever has really given m a hard time about it.

Does he have his own interests and hobbies? If so then he probably understands the passion but not the object of it.

I feel kinda lucky that we are both into gemstones as in my view it's another hobby that costs us money, but when you see typically which person in a relationship likes them then maybe it's my wife who is lucky here that her husband wants to cut stones for her to turn into jewellery

Yes, he is in a syndicate that buys/sells racehorses and spend a LOT of time doing that. He's actually had a few winners, but I'm really not that interested. I told him I'll get interested when he has a horse in the Kentucky Derby. And then I'll buy a hat {and of course a new piece f jewelry!}.

It's really sweet that you too share your love of gems. She is a lucky women! Gemstones are fascinating. I love looking at them in all different sources of light.