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Who buys the bands

F

focusr3

Rough_Rock
Joined
Feb 25, 2013
Messages
64
Ok so i think traditon is I buy my GF the Ering and her band then she buys My band,right?

The only reason i ask is because our friends are getting married and they are buying their bands jointly and they say thats how it should be. IDK if there is a right or wrong answer but what is the norm?
 
You are correct, tradition dictates you buy her e-ring and her wedding band, and she buys yours. But these days, I don't think most people go by "tradition" in much of anything!
 
Who cares ... once you get married it becomes a mixed bag. I bought my band and my husband's w-band.
 
I agree with Charmy and lovebug. These days anything goes. My dh bought both-my band and his though we picked them out together. After you are married (or sometimes before) many couples combine their money so really what's his is yours and what's yours is his(or as we like to say what's his is mine and what's mine is mine lol). :cheeky:
 
CharmyPoo|1363616771|3407746 said:
Who cares ... once you get married it becomes a mixed bag. I bought my band and my husband's w-band.
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+1 I couldn't even tell you who bought my band or his....we both have changed them several times since then either way :bigsmile:
 
We shopped and paid for it together (jointly).
 
There are no "rules " that must be adhered to. I think that whoever can pay for what, does. When I got married a zillion years ago, my husband was a student and contributed as much as he could for the ring. My darling daddy paid the difference. Didn't matter to my husband. After you get married, everything gets mixed together!!!!
 
Some "traditions" I don't think are worth being followed anymore. This is one of them. I will likely end up buying both my band and my girlfriend's band, as I am more able to do so financially, and I want a band that will be expensive.
 
Whoever wants to and has the cash on them when the bands are picked out.

I bought both my wedding bands, his wedding band, and his engagement ring. He purchased my engagement ring. I think I spent nearly double what he did. We found the receipts two weekends ago when we were clearing out some paperwork.
 
Rhea|1363626058|3407849 said:
Whoever wants to and has the cash on them when the bands are picked out.

I bought both my wedding bands, his wedding band, and his engagement ring. He purchased my engagement ring. I think I spent nearly double what he did. We found the receipts two weekends ago when we were clearing out some paperwork.
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You bought your husband an engagement ring?
 
jmarshall|1363626311|3407853 said:
Rhea|1363626058|3407849 said:
Whoever wants to and has the cash on them when the bands are picked out.

I bought both my wedding bands, his wedding band, and his engagement ring. He purchased my engagement ring. I think I spent nearly double what he did. We found the receipts two weekends ago when we were clearing out some paperwork.
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You bought your husband an engagement ring?
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Yes, I did.
 
That's pretty non-traditional.
 
I'm buying my SO's wedding band but not because tradition dictates it. I WANT to buy it for him, he deserves something beautiful and exactly to his liking. He's spending a lot of money on my rings, I want him to get exactly what he wants. To the tune of ~$2800 :) Which is a drop in the bucket compared to my set.
 
What does a mans engagement ring look like?
 
We were never much on tradition. I somehow got two wedding bands out of the deal ;) And that was just at the wedding; there have been several additions since.

It looks fairly similar to his wedding ring. It's a wide silver and titanium ring that he wore through our engagement. He rarely wear it now, heck, he rarely wears any band most days now! His wedding band is a wide silver and steel ring.

OP, I do hope that you reach some kind of agreement on who buys the bands! Honestly, I really don't think it matters. Except for answering this question I haven't thought about it for years. Most couples end up with at least some joint finances after marriage anyhow so whoever pays for it will probably affect you both if and when you combine money.
 
We did it the traditional way, but just for the "sweetness" of it - it really doesn't matter!
 
Rhea|1363626058|3407849 said:
Whoever wants to and has the cash on them when the bands are picked out.

I bought both my wedding bands, his wedding band, and his engagement ring. He purchased my engagement ring. I think I spent nearly double what he did. We found the receipts two weekends ago when we were clearing out some paperwork.
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That is very cool!!!
 
Rhea|1363628116|3407879 said:
We were never much on tradition. I somehow got two wedding bands out of the deal ;) And that was just at the wedding; there have been several additions since.

It looks fairly similar to his wedding ring. It's a wide silver and titanium ring that he wore through our engagement. He rarely wear it now, heck, he rarely wears any band most days now! His wedding band is a wide silver and steel ring.

OP, I do hope that you reach some kind of agreement on who buys the bands! Honestly, I really don't think it matters. Except for answering this question I haven't thought about it for years. Most couples end up with at least some joint finances after marriage anyhow so whoever pays for it will probably affect you both if and when you combine money.
Click to expand...
That is such a cool idea!!!!!
 
I 'paid' for my enagagement ring and both bands (because I get a better deal on foreign transactions and loyalty points on my credit card) and he transferred some money back. He was happy to pay for all of the bands (and I think he might think he did!) but he actually just paid for the engagement ring and something towards his.

He paid way more than the average for my engagement ring and I wanted a more expensive band so was happy to pay for it, its the sentiment behind the rings thats important to me, the actual band was more about getting exactly what I wanted to be looking at 24/7!
 
We were a little older so "we" paid for the wedding and everything else together. By the way I have changed my set. I wanted white gold and a bigger diamond. Not him. He is sentimental and rarely ever takes his off
 
I was young when we were married and I remember taking pride in buying his w-band. He bought mine. (No engagement rings.)
We had not combined finances yet, but we were both done with undergrad & working.
 
We both paid for them together, we were living together and had already combined our accounts, so it came out of our joint account.
 
lovebug1031|1363616507|3407745 said:
You are correct, tradition dictates you buy her e-ring and her wedding band, and she buys yours. But these days, I don't think most people go by "tradition" in much of anything!
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Exactly. We jointly bought our bands. But we had our finances integrated for 8 years before we got married!

Whatever works for you, is what it should be. As long as the couple are mutually satisfied with their arrangement, that's all that matters.
 
I bought him an engagement ring too but it only cost $30 and he lost it quickly. I just asked him who paid for the bands and he couldn't remember. I think he actually paid for my first one and I paid for the remake.
 
traditionally, a woman wouldn't have the money to buy her groom a band, but that wasn't a problem as men didn't wear wedding bands. Men's bands have only been a thing since WWII.
 
No rules what ever works for you guys. We enjoyed picking them out together. He had the money at the time so he paid. But then again my parents paid for 95% of the wedding.
 
For what it's worth, we decided that he would buy my engagement ring, and we would each pay for our own bands. Works for me! I lived at home for two years after college and saved up a lot of money. I'm happy I can buy whatever wedding band I want without have to worry about putting a financial strain on my bf (he hasn't proposed yet) who just recently graduated from grad school.
 
I think whoever can best afford them should buy them. Once you are engaged, I don't really think it matters if one person buys them both or the girl buys her own because she wants diamonds in it and he just bought a $$$ e-ring. However it works best to both get the rings you want!
 
We didn't really talk about i was going to buy her band because they give you a break on it when you buy the wedding set so i figured like others have mentioned it's only a matter of time before we join accounts and we both pay for it. But when are friends mentioned it she was saying that it is cool that they are going together to pick out rings. She has only pointed me towards what ering she wants because she doesn't want to pick out her ering she likes that i just go and get it she likes surprises. lol
This is the set i picked out the thing i don't understand is why one is 18k and the other 14k but if you look individually they sell both in either 14k or 18k but not as a set.
http://www.jamesallen.com/#!/engagement-rings/wedding-sets/18k-white-gold-0.54ct-common-prong-round-shaped-diamond-engagement-ring-0.57ct-common-prong-wedding-ring-item-5391
 
yeah I would ask if it is 14 or 18K, there is a typo in there.
 
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