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Whiny LIW Vent! (You''ve been warned, it''s whiny!)

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Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
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11,073
I''ve been so good about the LIW stuff lately. Haven''t given FF a hard time at ALL these past few weeks!


The past week I''ve just been so frustrated. I feel like I''m stuck for now, and I can''t do anything about it. It''s just SO frustrating! What I want right now is to get a job, save money, buy a house, and get ENGAGED! (Not necessarily in that order)

NONE of this can happen until I graduate in June. FF will propose shortly after I graduate. We can save money when I graduate. I can get a *real* job when I graduate... hopefully... c''mon economy!


I feel like these next 5 months are going to be hell, and I can''t get anything I want until at least the summer. I realize that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but it feels so far away right now. My life is a mix of a boring job (that I''m thankful to at least have) and endless hours of schoolwork.

Yes I realize I''m being whiny, and that I have to work hard for things to happen, but that''s just not making me feel better right this minute.
 

Definitely. Maybe

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 12, 2009
Messages
582
I can totally relate to you. I graduated in August and have had NO luck finding a job. A few interviews, but nothing. I want so badly to be able to have a job, save money, buy a house, get engaged, etc. BF doesn''t graduate for another YEAR, so it just seems like F.O.R.E.V.E.R.

Hopefully the economy will turn around and you will be able to find a job when you graduate. Just hang in there, I feel your frustration and pain. Everything will work out. Just take the time now and RELAX, because once you start working, planning a wedding, and looking for a house you are probably going to wish you had these 5 months back to relax a little. I know that doesn''t help, but just try to take it day by day and it will be here soon enough.

Also, I just want to applaud you for being good about the "LIW stuff." It takes a lot of self control sometimes to be "good." :)
 

cbs102

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 26, 2008
Messages
821
i actually don''t think that you are being whiny at all...you are just frustrated!
(((((HUGS)))))
i know how hard it is. there IS a light at the end of the tunnel..soon you will be engaged and have your degree..AWSOME!
 

decodelighted

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
11,534
Aw foo! This sounds familiar & very human! I think most LIW''s can relate ... and most folks period have been in particularly taxing "waiting" periods at some point in their life.

Lemmie ask you this? Fast forward. It''s two Junes from now. You''re married. You have a job. You bought a house & decorated it. Now what. You''re back to "the present". Just the daily grind. Its helpful to figure out how to live in the moment ... appreciate what *is* rather than just all the *might be* gonna be future awesomeness. Because there are way MORE periods of your life that''ll just kinda be existing ... with not many huge things on the horizon, except loved ones dying ... one by one.

Wow. That''s depressing today, huh?
 

tlh

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 31, 2008
Messages
4,511
You recognize there is a light. You also know this is just temporary. I understand your frustration, and it happens all throughout life.

DH and I want to move closer to our families. DH and I live 1500 miles away from them. (He wants it more than I do, a lot more.) We dont'' have enough saved up, the economy is dismal, and DH is still in school (he went back). So we wait. We know it will be a couple years. I WANT KIDDOS, BAD!!!! But DH is scared I wont take the leap and move after we have $$$ saved up to move jobless... if we have to worry about insuring kids... and cobra is $$$. So I have to put starting a family on hold for at least a year but most likely two. (Then we get to move.... and then we get to start to TRY to have kids.) I am scared because we have fertility issues w/ my family... but it is a risk my DH and I have talked about taking... but this risk, is also a HUGE gamble. No woman in my family has ever been able to successfully conceive after she hit 3-0. Where do you think I am... yup... so I know 30 isn''t a death sentance, which is why I am forever 25! haah! But it is a gamble.

So, trust me... I COMPLETELY understand the feeling of putting one''s life on hold... just waiting. But instead of being miserable, I fill my time w. other things. I train for marathons. When I finish a race, I put all my focus on the next one. My first marathon (injury has knocked me out from the 26 miler 5 years in a row! I only get to 13 miles, and cannot go on.) is in April. I just focus on running. Left foot, right foot, repeat.

So you are not alone, in life''s waiting game. My running helps me get through, if you find something you are passionate about... it will make a really nice distraction too. Plus, this summer is not as far away as December 2011.... feel any better???? I hope so...
HUGS!!!!
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Definitely: Congrats on graduating! I''m sorry you haven''t found a job yet. It really is rough out there. I''m in Michigan, and every day I hear of someone I know getting laid off. I''m already frustrated and haven''t even started looking. You''re right, I know it''s only 5 months, but this is like the culmination of everything I''ve wanted for so long. This is MY year... graduation, engagement... it''s overwhelming and I wish it could all happen now. Sometimes I worry FF will propose on my last day of school and graduating + engagement will be enough to give me a heart attack! Haha.

CBS Thanks for the support. I really am just frustrated. I hold things in a lot, and then I have moments (like today) where I just kinda snap a bit. Must... focus... on... June.....

Deco: This waiting period is like... 5 years in the making. I dropped out of college because I thought my emotionally abusive boyfriend at the time was more important.
So... I should have graduated in 2004. I''m DYING to graduate, and then... I of course want to get engaged!

Funny you should mention the "2 Junes from Now" thing. I''m really bad about constantly needing to go after something or look forward to something... but the anticipation gets to me. I guess I''m just crazy. Whenever I''m just "existing" I feel frustrated. I guess I should work on that... you''re right. Hobbies would help, but I''m so strapped for time that it''s hard to do anything outside of school. I think that''s fueling my bored, anxiety-ridden waiting period here.

And yes, thanks for the depressing death concept. Brightened my day right up.
 

caribqueen

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 22, 2008
Messages
507
It''s so great to have an outlet like this to get your frustrations out. Some really great advice here. It''s a reminder that''s it''s the journey that''s most important, not so much the destination. I took away a lot from this post. So thanks also.

This is probably the simplest time of all of our lives. When marriage and then possibly family comes, and other life events, there''s no turning back to the innocent days of just waiting for a piece of jewelry. :) I too, have am trying to enjoy every day and live in the present.
 

Dreamgirl

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,070
Ohhhh elle! *HUGS* I''m sorry but I feel your vent. It''s so hard when you feel something so close to you that you could almost touch it, but you can''t have it just yet. You are at least lucky to know the engagement is coming! Chin up! We have so much in common at the moment. Waiting for FF to get ''THE'' job is tough. Our whole future depends on it. There is so much we want and it feels so close.......I agree......C''MON ECONOMY!!!!!! I will keep my fingers crossed for you that you get ''THE'' job after you graduate.

I''m here for you.
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
11,073
Thanks, TLH I am trying to keep busy, but it''s hard when I have no time for anything but studying, and then I drift off into fantasy land. I start looking around the apartment thinking of all the things that I wish I could do, but can''t, because we don''t own the place. I just have to remember... it''s only 5 or so months. I will be engaged, and gradauted, in about 5 months. Whew. I can do this!

Caribqueen: Yeah, LIW is a great place for me right now. I try to keep whining to a minimum, but I''ve just been in such a funk about this that I had to let it out! I just want to get started on the rest of my life. I feel like my head is in one place, and I''m actually in another. Damn me for not graduating on time! I could''ve had a fiance and a job by now!

DG: Thanks for the hugs, lady! i don''t know what I''d do without you and all the LIWs! It seriously sucks because it IS so close. It''s attainable, almost-there-but-not-quite, and it''s driving me INSANE! Let hope both of us are able to get our lives (and our FFs!!) on track so we can both be happy, employed, and sooner-than-later ENGAGED!
 

xoxo

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jan 15, 2009
Messages
185
hi elle, your not being whinny, not at all. (((big hugs))) to you. But just think 5months will go by quick and next thing you know its that time already. Just think your preparing yourself for lots of exciting events to happen and when you graduate that is such a great accomplishment so yay for that. hope I helped a bit. hope you feel better =)
 

sammyj

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Aug 28, 2008
Messages
1,247
I don''t have much advice to give that hasn''t already been given, I just wanted to send a big **hug**! Your post wasn''t whiny at all and you seem like you''re being very realistic and mature about your current situation and your future. Hang in there! Come vent to us anytime.
 

Bia

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 28, 2008
Messages
6,181
Elle, as you said, its just temporary. Everyone is waiting for something, so know that it''s not just you! xoxoxo

That''s my drive-by post, because I am actually busy today at work! If you can believe it...


Feel free to vent whenever you''d like, that''s what we are here for.
 

elrohwen

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 20, 2008
Messages
5,526
I cracked up at your use of pouty html tags. Lol

I''m sorry you''re feeling frustrated! Patience is so frickin hard ... hopefully the time will fly by!
 

kittybean

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 2, 2008
Messages
4,125
No sage advice here--just wanted to say I''ve experienced it a lot! I am not a patient person. Hang in there, and know there are lots of people here supporting you.

Okay, wait, I do have some advice--you can judge whether it''s sage or not: enjoy today! Enjoy your relationship! Give your BF lots of affection and let him know how happy you are to be with him. Enjoy being in school! Enjoy not having the responsibilities that come with marriage and a house! Enjoy being who you are right this second.
 

SailorsSweet<3

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Sep 10, 2008
Messages
723
Im in the same position you are - working - going to school - and not looking at a proposal until SO gets back from deployment this summer. The best thing I can say right now is think back on your past semesters and how they NOW seem like they went by in a flash. Before you know it this semester will be over and you'll be going on job interviews and thinking to yourself - wow it feels like yesterday when I was frustrated with my position and situation and look, here I am right where I wanted to be! Then your SO with propose and you wont even remember what it felt like to post this thread



ps - I enjoyed your . Very cute
 

Still_Waiting

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 30, 2008
Messages
612
I, too, can relate. I''ve been looking for full-time work for a couple of years now with no luck. I know we won''t get engaged until I have a steady job, and it''s just SO hard sometimes!

Keep your chin up. It''ll happen eventually, even if not on your timeline. Some days are better than others for me, and I''m sure you feel the same. Try your very best to enjoy what you DO have right now (sometimes I have to remind myself daily, hourly, minutely-hee, hee I can make up words).

Time will pass before you know it!!! We''re all here for you!
 

musey

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Sep 30, 2006
Messages
11,242
Elledizzy, I know this is not what you want to hear, but you should really relish what you have left of school. I''m not going to tell you that what comes after it won''t be ''better'', but chances are, you''ll never get to be in that phase of your life again. It''s really something to fully experience and treasure. Let yourself be in the moment - ''real life'' can wait a bit for now.

I know how it feels to want to rush to the next stage, but you may look back on it with regret if you do.
 
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