Erin
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2004
- Messages
- 2,783
No. Sorry.Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
Most certainly not!Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
Signals immaturity to me. You don''t need mom to referee your relationship.Date: 3/23/2009 10:43:27 AM
Author: Starset Princess
Cause my future SIL called my Mom last night. I would be more po''ed that my bf called my Mom than anything we were fighting about.
Yup. This is a big NO-NO!Date: 3/23/2009 10:40:43 AM
Author: elledizzy5
Bah! I don''t know your relationship with her, but normally I''d say a big resounding NO!
I find it is in everyone''s best interest to NOT complain to those who are super close to you about your SO.
It will always bite you in the @$$.
Plus, I like to keep fights with FF between me and FF. No one else needs to hear it. Except PS.![]()
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why would his mom justify YOUR actions. Mom will always take their children''s side... 100% of the time. It is UNFAIR to ask anything else or to put mom in a position where she wouldn''t.Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
TLH, it was her future SIL, not her who did it.Date: 3/23/2009 11:12:33 AM
Author: tlh
why would his mom justify YOUR actions. Mom will always take their children''s side... 100% of the time. It is UNFAIR to ask anything else or to put mom in a position where she wouldn''t.Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
It is nice that you think you have a good relationship w the mom that you feel comfortable doing this... that is GREAT that your relationship is soo good... but I just don''t think that is appropriate.
I just think if you are looking to justify your actions... it is because you secretly know what you did was wrong.
Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
My brother and his fiance had a fight and she called our Mom about it. Unfortunately my Mom loves to give advice so she didn''t think it was that weird. My Mom should have been a counselor of some sort...Date: 3/23/2009 11:36:26 AM
Author: jcarlylew
Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
i would never do it. it depends on how close you are with his mom. but would you really want her knowing what you all fight about?
having read that your sil in call call you mom, well thats just weird. why is she involved? i would confide in my sister, but she would never call E''s parents..
I don''t think this is necessarily true.Date: 3/23/2009 11:12:33 AM
Author: tlh
why would his mom justify YOUR actions. Mom will always take their children''s side... 100% of the time. It is UNFAIR to ask anything else or to put mom in a position where she wouldn''t.
It is nice that you think you have a good relationship w the mom that you feel comfortable doing this... that is GREAT that your relationship is soo good... but I just don''t think that is appropriate.
I just think if you are looking to justify your actions... it is because you secretly know what you did was wrong.
I agree with this 100%Date: 3/23/2009 1:11:49 PM
Author: sba771
NEVER (although she would probably agree with me). You never want to give in-laws anything bad on you! That is my golden rule. No matter how badly I may want to call my mom, I also would never want my FI to look bad in her eyes and vice versa.
Date: 3/23/2009 11:39:12 AM
Author: Starset Princess
Date: 3/23/2009 11:36:26 AM
Author: jcarlylew
Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?
i would never do it. it depends on how close you are with his mom. but would you really want her knowing what you all fight about?
having read that your sil in call call you mom, well thats just weird. why is she involved? i would confide in my sister, but she would never call E''s parents..
My brother and his fiance had a fight and she called our Mom about it. Unfortunately my Mom loves to give advice so she didn''t think it was that weird. My Mom should have been a counselor of some sort...
Date: 3/23/2009 1:19:14 PM
Author: Bia
I don''t think this is necessarily true.Date: 3/23/2009 11:12:33 AM
Author: tlh
why would his mom justify YOUR actions. Mom will always take their children''s side... 100% of the time. It is UNFAIR to ask anything else or to put mom in a position where she wouldn''t.
It is nice that you think you have a good relationship w the mom that you feel comfortable doing this... that is GREAT that your relationship is soo good... but I just don''t think that is appropriate.
I just think if you are looking to justify your actions... it is because you secretly know what you did was wrong.
When my FI and I were younger, we broke up. His mother never automatically took his side (my mother didn''t do this either) and she still doesn''t, whether it''s bad or good. Yea, her love for him is unconditional and whatever he decided she would support, because she ultimately wants him to be happy. BUT she didn''t take his side just ''because.'' In fact, she helped him see where he might have been better off doing something differently. And it helped him even more.
I agree that airing dirty laundry with family (parents or whatever) is not smart because their opinions are often biased, but, if you have a good relationship with your in-laws, there is nothing wrong with sharing personal stuff, as long as it stays within the realms of what is appropriate. It really depends on your relationship with them.
And believe me, let''s not get it twisted, I know my FMIL loves me, but her son is her son. If he and I fight about something and I try to get her involved in an attempt to get her on my side and win her affection...well that''s just stupid. Only a fool would fall for that.
Date: 3/23/2009 11:12:33 AM
Author: tlh
why would his mom justify YOUR actions. Mom will always take their children''s side... 100% of the time. It is UNFAIR to ask anything else or to put mom in a position where she wouldn''t.Date: 3/23/2009 10:36:57 AM
Author:Starset Princess
Is it okay to call his Mom (or other family member) to get perspective on justifying your actions?