When someone uses your ideas...

[Begonia]

I need some help in my thoughts about something.

A work friend has been presenting my ideas at work as her own. She attended a workplace safety meeting a few weeks before I was able to. Another meeting is to take place on a few days. Can I somehow reclaim those ideas as my own without looking petty?

I'm new to workplace politics and committees, as I used to work outside as a landscaper/greens keeper. This has surprised and disappointed me, but is no doubt common in big corporations.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

It's best not to share your ideas with co-workers. To make sure you get the credit, include your ideas in your written communications to the management. I wouldn't try to reclaim your stolen ideas-it might make you look treacherous or envious or petty in management's eyes unless you can prove that the person stole them.

 

[House Cat]

How is she hearing about your ideas before you are able to present them as your own?

 

[Karl_K]

There isn't much you can do about it without looking bad.
Chalk it up to a lesson learned and be glad you found out now how untrustworthy that person is now instead of later.

 

[Begonia]

House cat: my explanation would be too revealing. I have a social media clause at my work place. We talked over coffee a short while ago - I didn't know she was going to this meeting.

Madam Bijoux: yes, lesson learned! Starting today, thats my approach. I've got so much to learn in this new work life I have. I was naive I'm afraid. Never again.

Karl: I thought so too, but I had to ask. So much experience and wisdom here. I'm disappointed and sickened, but I know what I'm dealing with now. I've got a ton of great ideas and a truckload of on the job experience she doesn't have. She got those ideas but they're the last ones.

 

[PintoBean]

Is it terrible for me to suggest the following?now that we know she's receptive to passing on YOUR ideas maybe you need to have more coffee talk with her and give her STINKIN' ideas

 

[Karl_K]

Is it terrible for me to suggest the following?now that we know she's receptive to passing on YOUR ideas maybe you need to have more coffee talk with her and give her STINKIN' ideas

I tried that once but the department manager loved the idea.....
Luckily the ceo was smart enough to shoot it down before it got implemented.
I heard the manager got an earful from the ceo so it wasn't all bad but it could have been real bad if the idea had been implemented.

 

[Begonia]

It sure is tempting Pinto

 

[FeFeV]

Is it terrible for me to suggest the following?now that we know she's receptive to passing on YOUR ideas maybe you need to have more coffee talk with her and give her STINKIN' ideas

I like your way of thinking!

 

[FeFeV]

My DH dealt with this quite a bit at his company a few years ago. As the most senior member of his team he has been instrumental in hiring and training his last three directors (we won't even get on that). The guy previous to his current director would ALWAYS try to pass off DH's work as his own even with a complete lack of technical proficiency! It was annoying because this director would then have to pull my DH into his meetings for Q&A and to provide details about functionality because he didn't understand the unique way that my DH often intentionally wrote the code (DH is a principal software engineer and developer). It looked crazy and EVERYONE knew what was going on. My DH is a Triple C (calm, cool & collected) kinda guy so his quiet confidence is often misconstrued until he has to ever-so-professionally check someone (including "higher ups"). DH is the youngest and most promoted employee of his company's region, because it is well deserved it really only becomes tasking to interface with the newer hires and how they "feel" about accepting direction and needing guidance/help from a 28 year old. Corporate culture of politics, egos, and nepotism can be SO DAMN DRAINING if you allow it to be. Just try not to bring that stress and exasperation home at the end of the day. If you share your ideas with others out of excitement always remember to leave out important details and be as vague as possible. Survival of the fittest is still a REAL thing, just not quite so literal.

 

[Begonia]

[QUOTE="Corporate culture of politics, egos, and nepotism can be SO DAMN DRAINING if you allow it to be. Just try not to bring that stress and exasperation home at the end of the day. If you share your ideas with others out of excitement always remember to leave out important details and be as vague as possible. Survival of the fittest is still a REAL thing, just not quite so literal.[/QUOTE]

FeFeV - Thanks for putting in to words what I'm experiencing. It's not just the intellectual theft but all of the above.

 

[partgypsy]

Ugh. I worked with this PI and she was good and professional in some areas, but people lower in her lab, well she did not treat them as equals. I should have known something was up when I helped re-analyze and re-write a manuscript written by someone who had just left the lab. She told me to take off the person's name who had left (and originally wrote the manuscript). I didn't feel that was right, but it was my first job post-graduate, and I deferred to her authority. As a post-doc and later as research associate in her lab, she only had her name on the outside of the lab (which made it confusing for both subjects and colleagues to find me). We wrote a grant together, with both of our names on it. I was very excited when it got funded. But then found out she took my name off and had me listed as an unnamed coordinator. She said it was because they didn't allow more than one investigator on a grant (which I later found out was not true). As I was the one doing the work on the study, whenever the grants manager visited, she would hustle for me to create all these reports that she would present. She also never introduced me to this person and when this person visited told me to keep my office door shut (with me inside). I didn't go to any of the conferences to present findings, because she said it was "more important" for me to be in the office writing.

 

[OoohShiny]

If you're in the same meeting as they are and they are presenting your ideas as your own, perhaps you could ask "That's really interesting - can you expand on that?" and see how they flounder lol

 

[monarch64]

If you're in the same meeting as they are and they are presenting your ideas as your own, perhaps you could ask "That's really interesting - can you expand on that?" and see how they flounder lol

This. And I would take it even further and be more direct. "How did you get there from the initial problem? What inspired you to come to this resolution?" I don't understand the logic of this making YOU look bad or petty. This person isn't giving credit and that's a huge no-no. You don't do it in writing, and you don't do it in any professional setting. She's the one in the wrong. Do not for one second think that if this were two men that they wouldn't call the other out on it. And there's no freaking WAY a female would get away with doing this to a male in the workplace.

You are new. You have great ideas. You've upset the apple cart with your great ideas because you're forcing others to step up their game probably because they weren't great at their jobs to begin with, or they've become complacent. Don't sit back and get bulldozed. You can overcome this with a little charm and by being assertive. It's all in the approach. And yeah, no more sharing ideas. Also, piece of advice: when you go into that meeting, seat yourself strategically. Don't sit in the back, or farther away from your co-worker than the meeting leader. I call it the "A" row: sit up front and center, or as close as you can get to the meeting leader in whatever seating arrangement. Position yourself as a leader if that is what you want to become. Good luck!

 

[Begonia]

I can't thank you enough for the input. I've certainly learned my lesson on this and the tips will help prevent more aggravation and idea theft.

As I am a representative in the upcoming safety meeting, I've gathered some ideas from other co-workers about what safety isues they feel are important. I'll present their ideas giving credit to each person and their department. My ideas will come at the end, and I'll include in that list my original ideas, along with a few new ones. And I'll sit next to the department head!