When did your baby start sleeping through the night?

[Skippy123]

I have to pop in here and say the boys ARE pretty much STTN. They do wake at 5 so I put in their paci and blankies and back to sleep they fall. This is one of the BEST PRESENTS to their Momma

Next I need to transition them to their cribs!!! Anyone transition them from the Rock and Sleeps to the Crib??

 

[Pandora II]

Hi Pandora,

Your Daughter sounds like an older version of mine . Journey's in the car are painful for me as well and usually result in full on screaming and tears often for both of us. At nine months my daughter is fiercely independent, and very persistent as well. That is one of the reasons I don't believe a cry it out approach to sleep would work for our family...Along with my beliefs about teaching and learning and brain development but that is just my opinion. Luckily she is able to speak a few words and generally communicate her needs/wants with greater clarity in the last few weeks which is beginning to make my life easier although she is now walking so exploring and getting into everything!!

I'm curious, did your daughter meet many of her developmental milestones (teeth, crawling, walking etc.) earlier than average?

I feel for you, I really do - it's hell when they hate the car.

I've followed a very AP approach from early on - I started out thinking I would do Baby Whisperer and sleep train etc. Then I got the real live baby who didn't seem keen to be trained. I was feeling exhausted and pretty desperate when I discovered Dr Sears and everything just made sense. I can totally see why it wouldn't be for everyone - and I was lucky to be in the UK so a year's maternity leave which makes life easier - but it makes a lot of sense to me.

I got quite stressed out when D got horrific separation anxiety - from 5 - 20 months we could barely go out as babysitters never came back for a second dose... madam would scream from the minute we left till we got home 3 or 4 hours later. I wondered where I had gone wrong - I'd done baby wearing, EBF, BLW, co-sleeping and was therefore promised a confident, independent child. Where were they?

Then a friend recommended Dr Sear's 'The Fussy Baby Book' - since D wasn't fussy, just a monster, I'd not considered it. However it was full of great advice for dealing with kids who were a bit more difficult than most.

Things do get easier all the time, but a lot depends on whether Miss Daisy feels like cooperating. If she doesn't then there's not a hope in hell. The last 10 days we've started star charts and it's been a big hit - no doubt the novelty will wear off, but in the meantime I hope to conqueror some of the most irritating things (running away when it's time to brush hair/get dressed/put on pjs etc).

In answer to your second question,

Yes, she was ahead on most things - she crawled at 5 months 2 weeks, pulled up 3 days later and was cruising by the end of the week. She started walking at 10 months (I was pretty unimpressed - I deliberately hadn't done tummy-time so as to delay the getting mobile stage!)

Her first words were at 7 months, by a year she knew the animals in the farm and their noises and the basic parts of the body and face (eyes, tummy etc) - I was obviously thrilled that she said 'goat' before she said 'mama'...

She's currently 2 years 8 months but her verbal ability is on a par with the 4 year olds in her nursery class. It's not that great though as I and others forget that she is only 2 and expect behaviour that isn't really reasonable. It's only when I see her with her actual peer group that I realise that I often treat her much older than she really is (and feel mean).

Being able to communicate well was great at the beginning, but now she argues back... the other day I asked her to pick her toys up and put them in the box for the nth time. The result was: 'Mummy, don't you talk to me like that. I don't want to do it.'

So I put her in TO. 'Mummy, I do not want to go in the corridor and you can't make me. You are not my friend anymore. You are a naughty Mummy and you should go and stand in the corridor. Do. you. understand.? Can I watch Harry Potter now?'

So I guess that was me told. She says it all with this fierce little look on her face and I have to struggle so hard not to laugh at her.

I think she was pretty average on teeth - first ones at 6 months.

Both my husband and I hit milestones early so we kind of expected to have a kid who did the same. His mother kept a weekly diary on all 4 of her kids from birth till the age of 7, so when we go to stay we look up whatever age D is and see what she can do compared with him. She's currently ahead on motor-skills but a little behind verbally (he could read Peter Rabbit at 3 so she's got a tough act to follow!)

 

[Pandora II]

Haha, add me to the group of co-sleeping parents who wants to know when they transition to their own bed or room. I'm on another forum where the moms all say their kids moved to their own bedrooms when they were ready. Not a lot of specifics there! A mom IRL told me that her son moved to his own bed when he started school and heard all his friends talking about their rooms. I have a feeling the answer is along the lines of every baby/child is different.

Pandora, Does your daughter fall asleep on her own? Did you used to have to rock her or pat her back? My baby won't fall asleep without being cuddled and having her back patted. I'm wondering when that ends . . . .

I think this will be the case...

We did have a discussion before Christmas when D was looking through a gift catalogue that had come through the door and spotted a fairy duvet cover.

- 'Oh mummy, look at the fairy duvet cover, Daisy would like that'

'It's very pretty, we could get you one for your bed in your room'

- 'For mummy's bed?'

'No, they only make small ones so it would have to be for your bed, and then you could sleep there at night with the fairy cover. Would that be nice'

silence...

- 'Maybe if we call them on the teffaphone they could make a big one for Mummy and Daddy's bed?'

'No, they can't make it for big beds. So, would you rather have the fairy duvet cover and sleep in your bed or no cover and sleep with Mummy and Daddy?'

silence...

- 'Sleep with Mummy and Daddy in their bed. And Mummy find a big cover for Mummy's bed with fairies on for Daisy.'

So I guess she's not planning on moving out in the next few months!

We are fortunate that she is like me and doesn't move at night. She's also a totally silent sleeper (used to terrify me when she was tiny - I kept thinking that she'd stopped breathing). She also rarely wakes up before 7.30am in the week and will easily sleep till 9am or later at weekends.

 

[Mela4567]

Her first words were at 7 months, by a year she knew the animals in the farm and their noises and the basic parts of the body and face (eyes, tummy etc) - I was obviously thrilled that she said 'goat' before she said 'mama'...

Hahah M now says "Dora" (the Disney cartoon character, despite the fact that we don't own a television, she was given a Dora Doll and adores it) and Dog but not Mama although she will occasionally point at me and call me Dada when I ask her to say Mama

I'm in Canada so we too have 12 months of maternity leave and I am taking at extended leave from work until September when I plan to return too days a week, making the current separation anxiety more tolerable.

The funny thing is people always comment that M is so sociable and friendly always smiling and waving and saying Hi to strangers, that is until mama leaves the room!

How long did you breastfeed D? We are still going strong at nine months and often feed many times in the night. When did D sleep through the night without a feed? M doesn't really wake just moans and groans and rolls to nurse.

 

[Pandora II]

M sounds very like Daisy. She was also very friendly and sociable - right up until someone tried to pick her up or I left the room. Then it sounded like she was being tortured - she'd get absolutely hysterical.

Once the separation anxiety ended at around 20 months things got a lot better. She still doesn't like to be picked up or touched by people she doesn't know - the child psychologist said that she had quite a large personal space compared with many children - but is very confident and friendly.

We took her to see her great-grandmother who has dementia and lives in a home at Christmas. A lot of kids would probably be quite stressed out at being in a room full of demented old ladies who all wanted to look at you. D looked a little uncertain for the first 5 minutes and then she was off playing with everyone there - I'd never have believed it possible a year earlier.

I'm still breastfeeding and D shows no signs of giving up. Until she was 2 she probably got around 80% of her calories from breastmilk. Now it's more like 30-40%. At night I feed her at bedtime (around 8.30pm), then when I go to bed around 12.30am, then she probably wakes to feed at least once during the night and again in the morning before she gets up. She never actually wakes up - just rolls towards me, she'll only fuss if she can't find it easily. If she's ill then she's basically stuck to me like a limpet 24/7...

During the day she'll nurse as often as she thinks she can get away with. Days that she's at nursery, the first thing she says when I go to pick her up is: 'Mummy, can I have milk when we get home?'

It was quite funny at Christmas - she asked me for milk and I said no, so she turned round to my youngest sister who was sitting feeding her 1 year-old baby and said: 'Charlie, Daisy have some Charlie milk?' When my sister said no, she went and asked my mother is she could have some of her 'milks' - my poor mother!

Some days it drives me crazy, others I am okay with it and others I think I'll be sad when she eventually stops. I have a friend with a child 3 months older who also co-sleeps and still nurses and we both go through 'I'm so done with this' phases. She's actually been breastfeeding for 8 years without a gap now (3 kids)!

I think the chances of her sleeping a full 12 hours or in her own bed until she's given up nursing are slim.

I come from a family where extended breast-feeding is pretty normal, and I have a lot of support from the doctors and child development people over it - partly because I live in an area with a high black African population who all tend to do extended nursing, baby carrying, co-sleeping etc (I'm the strange white lady who does it apparently!).

 

[Mela4567]

Thanks for your reply Pandora! We are just home from a weekend in the mountains and M always does well traveling, staying up later, going to restaurants as she is very sociable, and by some miracle she actually slept on the way there in her car seat. I have just changed to a larger convertible seat so it might be more comfortable for her.

Not wanting to be held by others has been a challenge especially for well meaning family members. I try to model interactions that stay respectful to M and ask her if I can pick her up etc. In front of them in the hopes that they too will ask her... Doesn't always work!

In my friendship group most moms begin to stop breastfeeding between 12 and 18 months so I will likely have some questions for you as we continue

Your story about D asking your sister for and Mother for milk made me laugh! When did Daisy begin going to Nursery?

 

[Pandora II]

I outright tell people to wait for D to come to them and not just pick her up - they learn fast when she gets hysterical if they don't!

D started nursery in October so she was 2 and a bit. Most nurseries round here don't take them till they are 2. She was ready to go when we sent her, a year earlier she would not have been and fortunately we were in a situation where it wasn't necessary for her to go.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I thought I would update because Ryder is now sleeping though the night from 7pm until 6am and has been doing so for about two weeks, so I think I can talk about it withough angering the sleep gods too much

WARNING if you are opposed to letting your child cry it out, skip the rest

About three weeks ago Ryder was in a phase of waking about three times a night and I was losing my marbles. My husband was out and he woke at 10:15 and I thought, now is as good a time as any! So I just did not go up to him. I worried he would wake our three year old, but since it was so early in the night I knew if Hunter did wake he would go back to sleep easily.

Ryder fussed then amped up to screaching, then quieted and then fussed and then screamed... on and off for about 45 minutes. Then he went to sleep. And did not wake until 6:30!

The next couple nights he woke at 5am and I fed him and then put him back down to sleep through until about 7:30. I had decided that I would only go in to him after 4am, because I figured if he made it that long he needed some food.

Then for a few nights he woke at 3am and was up for a while. The first night he cried and fussed and carried on for almost an hour on and off. And then the second night he was only up for about 20 minutes then fell asleep. He woke again at 5am and I fed him and put him back down.

And after that, not a peep in about 10 days.

Feels pretty good! He's a big boy and nurses about every two hours in the waking hours, but that is ok if he sleeps 11 hours at night.

 

[Skippy123]

I have to pop in here and say the boys ARE pretty much STTN. They do wake at 5 so I put in their paci and blankies and back to sleep they fall. This is one of the BEST PRESENTS to their Momma

Next I need to transition them to their cribs!!! Anyone transition them from the Rock and Sleeps to the Crib??

D, it IS the best STTN!!! We got lucky and did not have to CIO. I am sure we will have to CIO on other things though. Oh you reminded me to update this; the boys are in their cribs. woohooo

 

[Lynnie]

We let our son CIO at 10 months. It took about 5 nights; the first he cried for 30 minutes, and it got less thereafter... Now (at 15m), he goes down like a champ. In fact, just within the past week, he'll go to the bottom of the steps when he's ready (for bed OR a nap), and he'll point upstairs and say 'mmmmm eye, eye!!' (his version of 'night-night'). Up he goes without protest. I can't beleive he's actually asking to go to bed! I count my blessings daily
It was super rough before we let him CIO. I'd have to hold and rock him until his lids were drooping to even get him in the crib, and even then it didn't guarantee that he'd go to sleep. And he'd wake up 2 or 3 times during the night, for no reason other than to be coddled.
We've had 2 bouts of growth spurts since he started STTN. He'd wake up for 3 or 4 nights in a row at 2 or 3am screaming for food. It was crazy at first, because I had no idea what he wanted, I thought he was teething...