What''s the worst toast you have heard at a wedding

[D&T]

Jaylex-Hilarious! great stories

 

[jaylex]

lol. Thanks. I just hope that by posting those I''m not sending myself bad "karma" for my wedding day! lol

I just realized that I misspelled "speech" and that I used two different names for the girl in the second story AND I spelled "stacy" two different ways.. Oh well. that''s what being tired''ll do to ya! i should have just used her real name lol

 

[geckodani]

Date: 7/13/2009 10:26:34 PM
Author: D&T

Date: 7/13/2009 10:15:28 PM
Author: geckodani
The one that involved a puppet and the word sex.

And no, I'm not kidding.

You could hear crickets chirping in the room.

hey Dani- did you just attend a wedding this past sunday?

Sure did.

ETA: Actually I was in it. And how did you know that? LOL

 

[D&T]

Date: 7/14/2009 9:35:45 AM
Author: geckodani

Date: 7/13/2009 10:26:34 PM
Author: D&T

Date: 7/13/2009 10:15:28 PM
Author: geckodani
The one that involved a puppet and the word sex.

And no, I''m not kidding.

You could hear crickets chirping in the room.

hey Dani- did you just attend a wedding this past sunday?

Sure did.

ETA: Actually I was in it. And how did you know that? LOL

I was there! just kidding!

you had a farmer tan thread... floating about lol

 

[geckodani]

Date: 7/14/2009 11:27:55 AM
Author: D&T

Date: 7/14/2009 9:35:45 AM
Author: geckodani

Date: 7/13/2009 10:26:34 PM
Author: D&T

Date: 7/13/2009 10:15:28 PM
Author: geckodani
The one that involved a puppet and the word sex.

And no, I''m not kidding.

You could hear crickets chirping in the room.

hey Dani- did you just attend a wedding this past sunday?

Sure did.

ETA: Actually I was in it. And how did you know that? LOL

I was there! just kidding!

you had a farmer tan thread... floating about lol

I had a serious twilight zone moment there, LOL!

The farmer''s tan was successfully neutralized.

 

[Haven]

These are hilarious and sad, all at the same time.
That "Honor/On her" speech is the WORST! Oh my gosh, I don''t know what I would do.
Well, LitChick, your story was awful, too. I can''t believe that! (Can you imagine the car ride home for that guy and his wife. Wow.)

The worst wedding speech I ever witnessed was at DH''s friend''s wedding. The groom''s mother was very obviously drunk, she was swaying back and forth as she spoke and slurring her words. The groom was in the military, and I don''t remember the details of the speech but it went something like "Julie, if you can put up with living with a stiff like our son, we welcome you to the family! I mean, really, who raised him to be such a stick in the mud?! He''s so serious! I kind of feel bad for you, signing up for a life of rules and no laughing. HA!" Her husband ended up pulling her down into her seat while her brother grabbed the microphone from her hands. There was a bit of a struggle, and it was all very surreal.

Oh, it was horrible. The wedding was a very swanky, formal affair (up until that point,) and she was just so out of line.

 

[mousey]

My bros best man referred to the bride by my bros ex girlfriend''s name at the end of his speech. It was really awkward as my bro only ever dated one other girl, and they were together for ages. All the guests laughed at first, as if they thought it was a joke, and then there was deathly silence....

 

[ficklefaye]

does it count if it was more of a poorly sung song instead of a toast? the best man decided to sing a song instead of doing a traditional toast, it was just terrible, almost cleared the room

 

[D&T]

Date: 7/14/2009 2:40:31 PM
Author: ficklefaye
does it count if it was more of a poorly sung song instead of a toast? the best man decided to sing a song instead of doing a traditional toast, it was just terrible, almost cleared the room

oh how sad-

 

[LilyKat]

My cousin is an engineer, and her now husband was her line manager when she first started working for her firm. They both come from very traditional and conservative families, and the wedding was extremely formal. The best man''s speech (names changed):

"When Jenny first started working for Adam, he was her senior. So she spent all day working under him. And sometimes all night too."