Cehrabehra
Super_Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Jun 29, 2006
- Messages
- 11,071
My best friend and I have had our struggles the past couple years. We''ve been friends since freshman year of HS and after school our paths wildly diverged. I got married and had children, she pursued her phd and is wildly successful as a psychologist in SF. For the most part our differences were irrelevant, but lately she has become more and more self-centered as she can no longer deny her biological clock and the panic and anxiety have risen to the surface.
That''s the back story.
Now she finds herself falling in love with someone with terminal cancer. She is so attracted to this man that she can''t NOT continue walking the path she''s on, and yet she knows she is 40 and doesn''t have time to waste finding a partner she can spend longer than the next year with and have a family with. She''s always been philosophical and had this happened 10 years ago or 10 years from now she would have been a willing participant in whatever she could share with this man and take the good and learn from the bad. The timing on this is horrible for her. She doesn''t want to abandon him when he is at such a low point, and yet she doesn''t want it to progress because - well all of the obvious reasons. It is still early in the relationship and there are no commitments so for her to walk away wouldn''t be unreasonable, but like I said, she''s so drawn to him... sometimes I wonder if she''s drawn to people who are in some way either temporary or unattainable in an avoidance of long term compromise.
Mostly I just listen, there''s no right or wrong answer here - but I was wondering what other people would do in those shoes...
That''s the back story.
Now she finds herself falling in love with someone with terminal cancer. She is so attracted to this man that she can''t NOT continue walking the path she''s on, and yet she knows she is 40 and doesn''t have time to waste finding a partner she can spend longer than the next year with and have a family with. She''s always been philosophical and had this happened 10 years ago or 10 years from now she would have been a willing participant in whatever she could share with this man and take the good and learn from the bad. The timing on this is horrible for her. She doesn''t want to abandon him when he is at such a low point, and yet she doesn''t want it to progress because - well all of the obvious reasons. It is still early in the relationship and there are no commitments so for her to walk away wouldn''t be unreasonable, but like I said, she''s so drawn to him... sometimes I wonder if she''s drawn to people who are in some way either temporary or unattainable in an avoidance of long term compromise.
Mostly I just listen, there''s no right or wrong answer here - but I was wondering what other people would do in those shoes...