What tells you the most about a person....

[gemgirl]

I think you can tell the most about a person by their face, their eyes, the expressions they make and the language they use. Also, what they do with their face and gestures when they think no one is looking at them.

I don''t think a house or a car tell you anything about a person. Many very nice people believe in keeping their cars for twenty years, and personally, even though I''m a naturally born neat freak, I''ve let my house go in the last few years because I don''t want to live here anymore and it ticks me off to be stuck here. I''m in rebellion mode as far as my house goes.

 

[AdiS]

Date: 6/20/2010 7:32:16 AM
Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 5:45:24 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/19/2010 10:11:05 PM
Author: kama_s
Face for me. I very observant of the way people dress, expressions, body language etc. I''m generally right about the assumptions I make about a person within 30s of meeting them.

Same. It takes an exceptional control over your features to not let your thoughts show on your face at least a little bit, I think. A car and a home are just belongings, but the face and body language never lies, IMO.

Me too. And for that reason I would not choose face. As an INTJ I make quick and accurate judgments about others but I also am v.e.r.y controlled about what information I allow others to know. I don''t give anything away for free and will misdirect to glean information if I see fit. '' prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet '' Knowing this, I would not trust face given a choice, in case I meet my doppelganger.

I choose home. But the private rooms - the bedroom/bathroom/attic/garage. It is where many people are unguarded, soft and vunerable. Also doesn''t every looney/psycho have the press cuttings of their ''work'' in a basement somewhere; that would be a giveaway!

If I can make up my own answer I would say; let me see their family interacting.

Hah, I''m an ISTJ myself. Just imagine what a great time we''d have together, trying to guess what''s going on in each other''s heads:

"Can you tell my feelings on this?"
"No. You?"
"No."

Seriously though, you do have a point. Being good at reading people makes me that much more careful about not letting anyone read me. But honestly, most people don''t realize how telling their every move or expression is.

 

[joflier]

I think a car tells a lot about a person's personality and style.
A home tells more about the way they live or their habits.

 

[ksinger]

Date: 6/20/2010 4:25:17 AM
Author: Circe
I say home, but I'm one of nature's nesters: everything, from the colors of the furnishings, to the smallest knick-knack, will have some deep and comforting meaning to me. My home is all blue and gold and scarlet, books everywhere. I think it's a good reflection of me: cluttered, but fascinating.

On the other hand, a young man I once dated had a place that I called The Apartment Where Dreams Go to Die. No art on the walls, Playboy magazines proudly displayed on the shelves in proper order, disco ball in the bathroom, no soap in the shower, and so on. That, uh, should have been a warning sign.

Oh amen on the cluttered but fascinating. I like to think that about us too. While I am always envious of people who have sparse, elegant, eternally clean houses, I have to remind myself that quite a few of those people HIRE someone to do the actual cleaning. And the second thing - I have NEVER EVER seen one of those houses whose neatness I admired that was not utterly DEVOID OF BOOKS. This is a deal-breaker for me: if that gorgeous house requires a dearth of books, then I guess I'll have a cluttered house with books overflowing. One day we will both be dead (and some poor schmuck is going to be saddled with the job of disposing of our goods), there will be an estate sale, and people like me and hubs will walk in, see the massive bookshelves, peruse the wild array of topics, and go "Man, don't you just wish you could have met these people? They were interested in EVERYTHING!" Then, hopefully, they will buy our some of our books and read them and keep the cycle going.

I also have LOTS of artwork. And all of it is original - watercolors, oils, etchings and ceramics collected over 30 years, and needlework done by me.

I also have hobbies, which require space and stuff being OUT. You can't do certain activities, like making jewelry - if everything (!) must be got out and then put away every time you want to work. Right now my "dining room" table has a beading board, a dapping set, a disc cutter set, large magnifier on a gooseneck, various spools of wire, and a stack of...(wait for it....) BOOKS on it. There is also a watchmaker's lathe, a bottle of crystalline pickle, several hammers, a center punch set, polishing clothes, a small steel block....you get the drift. ( I really NEED a studio....sigh.)

So, it's also my observation that those people with too tidy houses don't actually DO anythng in them, except maybe play on the computer, watch TV, and shower in the morning. Now, that said, I really did have a much tidier house before THE MAN came along. I've just had to get over some of it - SOME of it, not all - but it IS the price you pay to live with another. Mine is not the best housekeeper to say the least, and picking up after myself was plenty. Picking up after both of us is like a perpetual race that I can never win.

So I guess my answer to the original question, would be HOUSE, hands down. It tells you infinitely more about a person than a car.

ETA - I guess I must address the fact that there are different "things" to learn about people. House is hard to fake IMO. Face/dress is easier to fake, really. Of course, neither will tell you what a person's character is. I just think house tells you what that person values - family pics, art, learning, whether their taste is funky or classic, what, if anything, they DO. Lot's to learn from a person's nest.... Car? meh.

 

[Maisie]

I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don''t have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

 

[onedrop]

Date: 6/20/2010 5:28:46 AM
Author: Gypsy
House.


But truly get a person? Travel with them. Even for a couple of nights. You get a feel for the real them, and get to see how they act in different situations with different people and there is a lot of enforced time together when folks aren''t ''on'' and you can see who they really are.

Gypsy, I totally agree with this!

 

[ksinger]

Date: 6/20/2010 10:05:43 AM
Author: Maisie
I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don''t have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

I blame the hubs.

I live in a tiny house too, and there really IS such a thing as too little space for the number of people. I don''t think too much about it really, unless someone''s house is truly filthy. Mine, and I suspect yours, is just clutter. And dahling, it''s such INTERESTING clutter. (That''s my story, and I''m sticking to it!)

But what are you talking about? Your place is adorable, and has such pretty blue walls!!

 

[missy]

Date: 6/20/2010 1:55:45 AM
Author: Haven
OBVIOUSLY, the way people treat others is the most telling thing about their character.


However, I do believe that the way we care for our belongings, as well as the things with which we choose to surround ourselves say something about what is important to us, what type of lives we lead, and thus, what we are like as people. (Incidentally, I didn''t see anything about ''character'' in the OP''s post.)


Cehra--I didn''t even think of a person''s home in terms of rich or poor, so it''s interesting to me that your first instinct was to think of the distinction between a rich person''s home versus a poor person''s home. People who hire others to care for their homes aren''t even on my radar. I think the amount of money you have has nothing to do with what your home tells others about you.

I 100% agree with Haven''s post.
We were answering the question which had 3 choices. Obviously there are way more telling characteristics but that was not a choice.

I can''t believe these answers! How on earth does a rich a-hole with a maid and an interior decorator speak ANYTHING about the character of a person? There are some very good people who have no money and are sloppy. I need to leave this thread.

Sara

And a poor person can take as much pride in their home as a wealthy person. Obviously if you hire an interior designer and have servants etc that might say more about the fact you have money than if you do everything yourself. However I take umbrage at the fact that you might think poor people cannot have warm and lovely homes whether renting them or on public assistance. Ofc you might not be thinking that at all and in that case I apologise. It just seems that your post was a bit hostile for some reason.

 

[Maisie]

Date: 6/20/2010 10:20:56 AM
Author: ksinger

Date: 6/20/2010 10:05:43 AM
Author: Maisie
I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don''t have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

I blame the hubs.

I live in a tiny house too, and there really IS such a thing as too little space for the number of people. I don''t think too much about it really, unless someone''s house is truly filthy. Mine, and I suspect yours, is just clutter. And dahling, it''s such INTERESTING clutter. (That''s my story, and I''m sticking to it!)

But what are you talking about? Your place is adorable, and has such pretty blue walls!!

And it has scruffy floors and windows!

I should clean more! I don''t think my house shows who I am at all. Now my face..... every line tells a story!

 

[Steel]

Date: 6/20/2010 11:36:38 AM
Author: Maisie

Date: 6/20/2010 10:20:56 AM
Author: ksinger

Date: 6/20/2010 10:05:43 AM
Author: Maisie
I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don't have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

I blame the hubs.

I live in a tiny house too, and there really IS such a thing as too little space for the number of people. I don't think too much about it really, unless someone's house is truly filthy. Mine, and I suspect yours, is just clutter. And dahling, it's such INTERESTING clutter. (That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!)

But what are you talking about? Your place is adorable, and has such pretty blue walls!!

And it has scruffy floors and windows!

I should clean more! I don't think my house shows who I am at all. Now my face..... every line tells a story!

May I respectfully disagree.

1. Compare your house to a neighbour's house and tell me your house says nothing about you.
2. I have seen your renovation thread and recent life changes caused you to makeover your home; why would you do that if you don't need your home to reflect you?
3. Your DIY is amazing and shows a sense of style that is definitively homely and warm but fashionable with an undeniable hint of classicism. It shows a woman who trys; isn't that you?

We all have scruffy floors and windows from time to time; but doesn't that reflect 'us' too

.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

1. The way the person treats animals
2. The way the person treats people who can never help him or her advance professionally or socially

 

[Steel]

Date: 6/20/2010 11:46:17 AM
Author: Madam Bijoux
1. The way the person treats animals
2. The way the person treats people who can never help him or her advance professionally or socially

I absolutely agree with you on both counts.

 

[Steel]

Date: 6/20/2010 9:58:42 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/20/2010 7:32:16 AM
Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 5:45:24 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/19/2010 10:11:05 PM
Author: kama_s
Face for me. I very observant of the way people dress, expressions, body language etc. I''m generally right about the assumptions I make about a person within 30s of meeting them.

Same. It takes an exceptional control over your features to not let your thoughts show on your face at least a little bit, I think. A car and a home are just belongings, but the face and body language never lies, IMO.

Me too. And for that reason I would not choose face. As an INTJ I make quick and accurate judgments about others but I also am v.e.r.y controlled about what information I allow others to know. I don''t give anything away for free and will misdirect to glean information if I see fit. '' prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet '' Knowing this, I would not trust face given a choice, in case I meet my doppelganger.

I choose home. But the private rooms - the bedroom/bathroom/attic/garage. It is where many people are unguarded, soft and vunerable. Also doesn''t every looney/psycho have the press cuttings of their ''work'' in a basement somewhere; that would be a giveaway!

If I can make up my own answer I would say; let me see their family interacting.

Hah, I''m an ISTJ myself. Just imagine what a great time we''d have together, trying to guess what''s going on in each other''s heads:

''Can you tell my feelings on this?''
''No. You?''
''No.''

Seriously though, you do have a point. Being good at reading people makes me that much more careful about not letting anyone read me. But honestly, most people don''t realize how telling their every move or expression is.

Yup.

For example, I am interested to hear people say that "people always say I''m like ''samantha''/a bitch/really athletic but I don''t think I am because of x y z".

Translation: Don''t you think I am like ''samantha''/a bitch/really athletic?

 

[Lulie]

More options please? Teeth, tone of voice, surprise home visit/talking to the maid.

 

[princesss]

ITA with Gypsy - travel with somebody. I''m planning a trip with a friend for next fall (as in, fall 2011), and I really hope she still likes me! LOL.

 

[Steel]

Date: 6/20/2010 12:05:53 PM
Author: princesss
ITA with Gypsy - travel with somebody. I''m planning a trip with a friend for next fall (as in, fall 2011), and I really hope she still likes me! LOL.

Worry that you still like her.

 

[AdiS]

Date: 6/20/2010 11:55:08 AM
Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 9:58:42 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/20/2010 7:32:16 AM
Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 5:45:24 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/19/2010 10:11:05 PM
Author: kama_s
Face for me. I very observant of the way people dress, expressions, body language etc. I''m generally right about the assumptions I make about a person within 30s of meeting them.

Same. It takes an exceptional control over your features to not let your thoughts show on your face at least a little bit, I think. A car and a home are just belongings, but the face and body language never lies, IMO.

Me too. And for that reason I would not choose face. As an INTJ I make quick and accurate judgments about others but I also am v.e.r.y controlled about what information I allow others to know. I don''t give anything away for free and will misdirect to glean information if I see fit. '' prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet '' Knowing this, I would not trust face given a choice, in case I meet my doppelganger.

I choose home. But the private rooms - the bedroom/bathroom/attic/garage. It is where many people are unguarded, soft and vunerable. Also doesn''t every looney/psycho have the press cuttings of their ''work'' in a basement somewhere; that would be a giveaway!

If I can make up my own answer I would say; let me see their family interacting.

Hah, I''m an ISTJ myself. Just imagine what a great time we''d have together, trying to guess what''s going on in each other''s heads:

''Can you tell my feelings on this?''
''No. You?''
''No.''

Seriously though, you do have a point. Being good at reading people makes me that much more careful about not letting anyone read me. But honestly, most people don''t realize how telling their every move or expression is.

Yup.

For example, I am interested to hear people say that ''people always say I''m like ''samantha''/a bitch/really athletic but I don''t think I am because of x y z''.

Translation: Don''t you think I am like ''samantha''/a bitch/really athletic?

lol, I had a colleague once who was obviously convinced she had an uncanny resemblance with Anne Hathaway. (She was a brunette and that was all there was, btw.) She''d just randomly babble out how people always told her she''s a dead ringer for Anne and then she''d add "But she''s so much prettier than me, right?" and then she''d look at you expectantly, waiting for you to deny it. The first time I heard that, I absent-mindedly said "Right" and she looked like she wanted to strangle me

Sorry for the slight OT, rockzilla. Mea culpa!

 

[missy]

Date: 6/20/2010 11:46:17 AM
Author: Madam Bijoux
1. The way the person treats animals

2. The way the person treats people who can never help him or her advance professionally or socially

I agree that these are the 2 most important indicators of a person''s character for sure.

 

[Hera]

Date: 6/20/2010 12:30:06 PM
Author: AdiS

Date: 6/20/2010 11:55:08 AM

Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 9:58:42 AM

Author: AdiS

Date: 6/20/2010 7:32:16 AM

Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 5:45:24 AM

Author: AdiS

Date: 6/19/2010 10:11:05 PM

Author: kama_s

Face for me. I very observant of the way people dress, expressions, body language etc. I'm generally right about the assumptions I make about a person within 30s of meeting them.

Same. It takes an exceptional control over your features to not let your thoughts show on your face at least a little bit, I think. A car and a home are just belongings, but the face and body language never lies, IMO.

Me too. And for that reason I would not choose face. As an INTJ I make quick and accurate judgments about others but I also am v.e.r.y controlled about what information I allow others to know. I don't give anything away for free and will misdirect to glean information if I see fit. ' prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet ' Knowing this, I would not trust face given a choice, in case I meet my doppelganger.


I choose home. But the private rooms - the bedroom/bathroom/attic/garage. It is where many people are unguarded, soft and vunerable. Also doesn't every looney/psycho have the press cuttings of their 'work' in a basement somewhere; that would be a giveaway!


If I can make up my own answer I would say; let me see their family interacting.

Hah, I'm an ISTJ myself. Just imagine what a great time we'd have together, trying to guess what's going on in each other's heads:


'Can you tell my feelings on this?'

'No. You?'

'No.'

Seriously though, you do have a point. Being good at reading people makes me that much more careful about not letting anyone read me. But honestly, most people don't realize how telling their every move or expression is.

Yup.


For example, I am interested to hear people say that 'people always say I'm like 'samantha'/a bitch/really athletic but I don't think I am because of x y z'.


Translation: Don't you think I am like 'samantha'/a bitch/really athletic?

lol, I had a colleague once who was obviously convinced she had an uncanny resemblance with Anne Hathaway. (She was a brunette and that was all there was, btw.) She'd just randomly babble out how people always told her she's a dead ringer for Anne and then she'd add 'But she's so much prettier than me, right?' and then she'd look at you expectantly, waiting for you to deny it. The first time I heard that, I absent-mindedly said 'Right' and she looked like she wanted to strangle me

Sorry for the slight OT, rockzilla. Mea culpa!

Lol! I know someone who thought that she looked like Anne Hathaway also! She made a picture of Anne Hathaway her avatar on Facebook for almost a year!

 

[Maisie]

Date: 6/20/2010 11:45:17 AM
Author: Steal

Date: 6/20/2010 11:36:38 AM
Author: Maisie

Date: 6/20/2010 10:20:56 AM
Author: ksinger

Date: 6/20/2010 10:05:43 AM
Author: Maisie
I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don''t have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

I blame the hubs.

I live in a tiny house too, and there really IS such a thing as too little space for the number of people. I don''t think too much about it really, unless someone''s house is truly filthy. Mine, and I suspect yours, is just clutter. And dahling, it''s such INTERESTING clutter. (That''s my story, and I''m sticking to it!)

But what are you talking about? Your place is adorable, and has such pretty blue walls!!

And it has scruffy floors and windows!

I should clean more! I don''t think my house shows who I am at all. Now my face..... every line tells a story!

May I respectfully disagree.

1. Compare your house to a neighbour''s house and tell me your house says nothing about you.
2. I have seen your renovation thread and recent life changes caused you to makeover your home; why would you do that if you don''t need your home to reflect you?
3. Your DIY is amazing and shows a sense of style that is definitively homely and warm but fashionable with an undeniable hint of classicism. It shows a woman who trys; isn''t that you?

We all have scruffy floors and windows from time to time; but doesn''t that reflect ''us'' too

.

I would never have thought that my decorating would show that I am someone who tries. But you are correct. I do try. Hmmm, I wonder what else you know about me Steal!

 

[Hera]

Date: 6/20/2010 12:37:43 PM
Author: missy

Date: 6/20/2010 11:46:17 AM

Author: Madam Bijoux

1. The way the person treats animals


2. The way the person treats people who can never help him or her advance professionally or socially

I agree that these are the 2 most important indicators of a person''s character for sure.

Huge ditto! I think my house says some things about what my likes/dislikes and habits etc but it doesn''t reveal who I am. I am much more complex than that.

 

[Autumnovember]

Wow...this question is so hard

I WOULD say face because I feel like there are people that have very friendly, happy, approachable faces...and then other people who are the opposite. When I see someone who has a very stoic face, I decide they're mean.

I shouldn't considering I have a very serious face but I'm actually very friendly and sociable with everyone around me.

House can definitely say a lot but again, hard to say because there are homes that are very cozy and welcoming. Others are very modern and sophisticated. My parents aren't into putting up pictures all over the house. They have a very modern home and its "homey" for ME, but someone else may not agree and decide my parents are very strict people, etc. My parents home is always very very very clean. It's very "airy"

Car- Hmmm. This depends. Is this persons car the car that they got only because they could afford it? Or is it a car that they bought because its everything they've wanted in the car, looks and all? For example..the car I drive now was very me when I bought it when I was 18 years old. Now that I'm 22 I picture myself in either a Audi Q7, S5 or a 2010 Maxima.

 

[galeteia]

Wow.

That''s the criteria options we have? Well, then I guess from my face you''d guess I was a glutton, from my apartment you''d think I was a lazy pig, and from my car you''d think I didn''t exist at all because I don''t have one as I don''t drive.

I used to have a very tidy apartment until I started working 40+ hours a week to support my graduate student partner. A symptom of my medical condition is low energy and poor sleep, but I haul myself off to work at a low-paying, soul-crushing job every day to provide for us. I don''t have time or energy to keep our microscopic, no-storage apartment spotless, and although my partner is home much more than I am, he is busy with his schooling. I make sure we both have clean, mended clothes to wear, are groomed and presentable, and that we have healthy food to eat. But I guess those things don''t matter since my HOUSE is more important.

He has two cars, both hand-me-downs from his family while he is in school. One has a bike rack on it which he uses to get from nearby streets to classes, and the other is one recently given to him by his father so we''d have a reliable car to use if we had to travel because the other one is so old and worn out that it''s not reliable. But I guess you''d judge us by how new, clean, or what type of car it is.

Seriously. The shallowness and superficiality of these questions and some of these answers is offensive. I''d hate to think my worth as a person is judged by the tidiness of my home instead of viewing it as a sign of having my priorities straight.

 

[Steel]

Date: 6/20/2010 2:23:39 PM
Author: Galateia
Wow.

That''s the criteria options we have? Well, then I guess from my face you''d guess I was a glutton, from my apartment you''d think I was a lazy pig, and from my car you''d think I didn''t exist at all because I don''t have one as I don''t drive.

I used to have a very tidy apartment until I started working 40+ hours a week to support my graduate student partner. A symptom of my medical condition is low energy and poor sleep, but I haul myself off to work at a low-paying, soul-crushing job every day to provide for us. I don''t have time or energy to keep our microscopic, no-storage apartment spotless, and although my partner is home much more than I am, he is busy with his schooling. I make sure we both have clean, mended clothes to wear, are groomed and presentable, and that we have healthy food to eat. But I guess those things don''t matter since my HOUSE is more important.

He has two cars, both hand-me-downs from his family while he is in school. One has a bike rack on it which he uses to get from nearby streets to classes, and the other is one recently given to him by his father so we''d have a reliable car to use if we had to travel because the other one is so old and worn out that it''s not reliable. But I guess you''d judge us by how new, clean, or what type of car it is.

Seriously. The shallowness and superficiality of these questions and some of these answers is offensive. I''d hate to think my worth as a person is judged by the tidiness of my home instead of viewing it as a sign of having my priorities straight.

Don''t get your knickers in a twist.

Hangout is not a ''heavy'' forum. It certainly will not buck the trend on how society judges us and judge us they will. I know I will continue to make assessments of people based on information presented to me.

I''m sorry if aspects of your situation upset you.

 

[ksinger]

Well, the ''what'' that is being revealed seems to really be the issue at hand. Is the "it" character? Interests? Personal habits? Different things reveal different...things. We all get a first impression from someone''s deameanor - which may or may not be correct - depending on a bunch of things. I don''t believe that I am so observant that I might not be conned by a skilled con person. Anyone can be conned given the right conditions.

But if you ONLY allowed me to look at someone''s face OR look at their home OR look at their car (NO talking, no travelling, no dogs, cats, or hamsters), I would still say the house reveals the most in the same amount of observational time. Does the person have artwork? Lots of family photos? Things that appear to be treasured heirlooms? Do they have a cat jungle gym? Is the house cluttered? Neat? Books? No books? Well put together furnishings or a velvet Elvis painting? (that''s for Kenny). The house can even reveal illness (smell) or mental state (all black room?) that you might not catch from just looking at a face, and certainly not from looking at a car.

Now, if I get to interact with that person, or observe their behavior to others, that''s clearly a different creature and reveals character more, but that wasn''t the original question.

As for the people who are getting their knickers all in a twist about this question - having stuff revealed about you doesn''t necessarily imply there will be summary dismissal of you as a crappy/bad/whatever person. The fact that you KNOW that a filthy house invites someone to think you slovenly, means you''ve probably applied just such judgements yourself before, fair or not. Anyone who says that this type of judgement not what any first impression is, if fooling himself. And none of us gets through a day without making these snap judgements. It''s OK, really. The problem arises when we aren''t willing to revise them based on additional evidence to the contrary of our initial impression.

 

[Jennifer W]

Date: 6/20/2010 10:05:43 AM
Author: Maisie
I wonder what you would all make of me. I live in a local authority house. I don''t have much money and drive an old car. My house is never tidy (I blame the kids) and its usually in need of a good clean.

Having lived with an architect for many years now, I can tell you that I''d take a well built local authority house with high space specifications and build standards over any number of the new build, expensive housing schemes that are cropping up all over the UK right now.

Anyway, I''ve seen photos of your house and it''s beautiful.

My house and my car are both very old. I''ve never washed the car in the 8+ years of its life and it looks fine. I do clean out the inside occasionally, but it isn''t what you''d call pristine. Someone else cleans my house, so that''s no reflection on me. Left to my own devices, I''d live in an episode of Hoarders...

On that basis, I''m going to vote face (but I 100% agree with Gypsy about travelling with someone to get to know them).

Jen

 

[movie zombie]

given the choices permitted by the OP, i''d say "face". car and house are merely financial artifices which often are a turn off for me. new cars and big large houses don''t impress me. however, i can tell a lot from a person''s face, espcially when that person is interacting with other people. i''d rather get to know the face.

my husband now drives a 1993 honda accord ex.....he treats it like a traveling trash cans at times [that has improved with me in his life!]. however, i met his face before i met his car. he is a generous, kind, and wonderful man that i''d have been a fool to judge by his car....which at that time was an aged hyundai on its last legs and a duct taped window: a friend of his even said to him in front of me that his car was the worst in the parking lot [silicon valley campus, microsoft]. and it was....and his 1993 accord is still the worst car in the parking lot. i''ll take the man over the car any day!

mz

 

[gardengloves]

A couple of days on a sail boat at sea.. confined space, changing conditions- how people behave can make or break a situation that develops, even without sailing skills, a good personality can help everyone.

DH and I have all sorts of friends we enjoy but only a small few do we sail with.

 

[Haven]

I''m really surprised to see the amount of people who are allowing this thread to bother them. It''s also very interesting how so many of you who are upset by this thread are assuming that when someone says your house says a lot about you, that someone is only concerned with the financial value of the house.

Whoever said that any of these things tell anyone anything about your *worth* as a person?! These things can tell me about your hobbies, your habits, your loved ones, and the types of things you value (artwork, friendships, travel, hobbies, etc.) but your home certainly doesn''t tell me anything about your worth as a person.

I think that the different ways people are responding to this question are very telling, actually. And I don''t mean that in a snarky way at all. It''s just very interesting that some people seem to automatically think of this question in terms of MONEY or FINANCIAL POSTITION, while others think of it in terms of HABITS or INTERESTS.

Similar to Circe and Ksinger, I''m a nester. I love creating a cozy little haven for my family, and the things I choose to put in my home would definitely tell you a lot about what I enjoy and what I value. The way I keep my home will tell you about how I live my life. (Visit during finals, and it''s a disaster. Visit during the summer and you''ll find fresh flowers and recently cleaned floors.)

Do I think any of this tells anyone else anything about my *character* or my *worth* as a person? No. But if other people chose to make judgments about those things based on my home I wouldn''t care, anyway, because only *I* decide my worth as a person. And the only people whose opinion I''m concerned with where character is concerned are my loved ones, and they know much more about me than what my home, car, or face looks like.

And not that it was an option, but I completely agree with Gypsy that you learn the most about people when you travel with them. Or live with them for any amount of time. (Sleepover camp, anyone?) After going to Ireland with my sister and her FI DH and I learned SO MUCH about them, and we''re very close already. BUT, that wasn''t an option, so I still pick "house."

 

[gardengloves]

Date: 6/20/2010 5:28:46 AM
Author: Gypsy
House.


But truly get a person? Travel with them. Even for a couple of nights. You get a feel for the real them, and get to see how they act in different situations with different people and there is a lot of enforced time together when folks aren't 'on' and you can see who they really are.

Or sail with them, the ultimate pressure cooker environment with no where to go, everyone confined to the boat surrounded by forces of nature.

We have sail friends we'd go anywhere with - One trip in particular - starts out nice day, routine sail - Marblehead to Newport - beautiful day, - left port in high spirits - seas start to build, NOA issues small craft warning, gale force winds coming in , gust 40- 70 knots expected, In dry NOA language, violent storms expected ... suddenly we are in the midst of chaotic 15 foot rolling seas, with breakers splashing over us-. everyone maintains cool, some getting sick, that would be me--- from the beam to rolling, a sickening side to side motion... Your going to find out a lot about your fellow travelers in this scenario, and hope you've got the right crew. this story ended with laughs with our best friends, but we knew that going in, and sailed with them again and again.