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What is the most traumatic and/or stressful thing or event you have ever experienced?

missy

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I realize this might be a difficult thread to share in so not sure it will get off the ground so to speak. We are all different and some find catharsis in sharing and others are more private and do not find relief in sharing with others. Especially internet friends. Or for some it might be easier to share with those you don't really know.

What is the most stressful experience you ever had to deal with and how did you overcome it?


calvinandhobbeshugging.gif
 

luv2sparkle

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Missy, this might be a hard one to get started.
I could post quite a bit as I am sure other could as well. I hesitate because at this point most things are just water under the bridge, and I do not want sympathy.
Just posting sounds like you do. I just stopped in for a quick check this morning with my coffee before heading out with DH for his doctor appointment in LA. Like you, I would be interested to hear others stories and what they have overcome. That is the interesting part to me. How they got past it. Not that it happened.
 

YadaYadaYada

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Immediately I thought of the friendship of over 20 years that ended a few years ago but I haven't overcome that yet.

So I will go with the next most traumatic which was my father's death in 2011. To fully appreciate this there needs to be a bit of background.

My father remarried a few years after my mom passed away, I was maybe 10 or 11, I knew immediately that she didn't like kids, she only wanted my dad but I was part of the package, she was so awful to me that I moved out at 16. Now I had a very difficult relationship with my dad, we were mostly estranged, had reconnected briefly but then good old stepmom never changed her ways so the estrangement resumed.

Then one night I was sitting on the couch and the phone rings and it's my brother (who I had not spoken to since moving out, roughly 17 years prior) and he tells me that dad is dying, my stepmother had sent him a letter to let him know but it took him two weeks to retrieve his mail (because he is a hermit). I immediately call my other brother (the two brothers don't speak to each other and I had not spoken to him in 15 years) and have to talk to my SIL and tell her the whole story and if my brother wants to talk to him then he needs to call now and here is the number.

After all that I just sat there trying to gather my thoughts and decided that I wouldn't call that night but in the morning. In the morning I drove up to the park where dad used to take me and made the phone call to hospice, the nurse told me I was too late, that he couldn't understand or respond, I hung up the phone and bawled there in the parking lot. The cemetery where my mom is buried is across the street from the park so I immediately drove across the street and I sat there and cried and told her dad had died and how guilty I felt that he probably died thinking I hated him. I got back in the car and drove home.

It took months to come to terms with this death and the immense amount of guilt I felt, I so wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him, that I forgave him for the neglect that was a result of his severe drinking problem after my mom passed and that I was sorry we couldn't have a better relationship.

In the end what pulled me out of the grief was knowing I did everything possible and that we had lost precious weeks to contact our father because of how evil my stepmother was, I mean who informs a man's children that he is on his deathbed by letter? Who does that? I just had to forgive myself and it took the good part of a year for that to happen. I haven't heard from either of my brothers since, I did send the one who initially called me a picture of our oldest son so he could see his nephew but there has been no contact since. Sad really, I know my mother would not have wanted the family she helped create to turn out this way.
 

House Cat

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Immediately I thought of the friendship of over 20 years that ended a few years ago but I haven't overcome that yet.

So I will go with the next most traumatic which was my father's death in 2011. To fully appreciate this there needs to be a bit of background.

My father remarried a few years after my mom passed away, I was maybe 10 or 11, I knew immediately that she didn't like kids, she only wanted my dad but I was part of the package, she was so awful to me that I moved out at 16. Now I had a very difficult relationship with my dad, we were mostly estranged, had reconnected briefly but then good old stepmom never changed her ways so the estrangement resumed.

Then one night I was sitting on the couch and the phone rings and it's my brother (who I had not spoken to since moving out, roughly 17 years prior) and he tells me that dad is dying, my stepmother had sent him a letter to let him know but it took him two weeks to retrieve his mail (because he is a hermit). I immediately call my other brother (the two brothers don't speak to each other and I had not spoken to him in 15 years) and have to talk to my SIL and tell her the whole story and if my brother wants to talk to him then he needs to call now and here is the number.

After all that I just sat there trying to gather my thoughts and decided that I wouldn't call that night but in the morning. In the morning I drove up to the park where dad used to take me and made the phone call to hospice, the nurse told me I was too late, that he couldn't understand or respond, I hung up the phone and bawled there in the parking lot. The cemetery where my mom is buried is across the street from the park so I immediately drove across the street and I sat there and cried and told her dad had died and how guilty I felt that he probably died thinking I hated him. I got back in the car and drove home.

It took months to come to terms with this death and the immense amount of guilt I felt, I so wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him, that I forgave him for the neglect that was a result of his severe drinking problem after my mom passed and that I was sorry we couldn't have a better relationship.

In the end what pulled me out of the grief was knowing I did everything possible and that we had lost precious weeks to contact our father because of how evil my stepmother was, I mean who informs a man's children that he is on his deathbed by letter? Who does that? I just had to forgive myself and it took the good part of a year for that to happen. I haven't heard from either of my brothers since, I did send the one who initially called me a picture of our oldest son so he could see his nephew but there has been no contact since. Sad really, I know my mother would not have wanted the family she helped create to turn out this way.
I’m so sorry Stephanie. Sending you hugs.
 

missy

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Missy, this might be a hard one to get started.
I could post quite a bit as I am sure other could as well. I hesitate because at this point most things are just water under the bridge, and I do not want sympathy.
Just posting sounds like you do. I just stopped in for a quick check this morning with my coffee before heading out with DH for his doctor appointment in LA. Like you, I would be interested to hear others stories and what they have overcome. That is the interesting part to me. How they got past it. Not that it happened.


Yes I agree but we are all different and some might find relief sharing. I don’t think anyone is looking for sympathy per se if posting. I know I’m not. Just by sharing it could be cathartic for some. And of course we always learn from others and seeing how one gets through traumatic events and thrive well that’s valuable. I learn so much from others experience. I find sharing works both ways. Helps the one sharing and helps others reading about the experience.
 

missy

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Immediately I thought of the friendship of over 20 years that ended a few years ago but I haven't overcome that yet.

So I will go with the next most traumatic which was my father's death in 2011. To fully appreciate this there needs to be a bit of background.

My father remarried a few years after my mom passed away, I was maybe 10 or 11, I knew immediately that she didn't like kids, she only wanted my dad but I was part of the package, she was so awful to me that I moved out at 16. Now I had a very difficult relationship with my dad, we were mostly estranged, had reconnected briefly but then good old stepmom never changed her ways so the estrangement resumed.

Then one night I was sitting on the couch and the phone rings and it's my brother (who I had not spoken to since moving out, roughly 17 years prior) and he tells me that dad is dying, my stepmother had sent him a letter to let him know but it took him two weeks to retrieve his mail (because he is a hermit). I immediately call my other brother (the two brothers don't speak to each other and I had not spoken to him in 15 years) and have to talk to my SIL and tell her the whole story and if my brother wants to talk to him then he needs to call now and here is the number.

After all that I just sat there trying to gather my thoughts and decided that I wouldn't call that night but in the morning. In the morning I drove up to the park where dad used to take me and made the phone call to hospice, the nurse told me I was too late, that he couldn't understand or respond, I hung up the phone and bawled there in the parking lot. The cemetery where my mom is buried is across the street from the park so I immediately drove across the street and I sat there and cried and told her dad had died and how guilty I felt that he probably died thinking I hated him. I got back in the car and drove home.

It took months to come to terms with this death and the immense amount of guilt I felt, I so wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him, that I forgave him for the neglect that was a result of his severe drinking problem after my mom passed and that I was sorry we couldn't have a better relationship.

In the end what pulled me out of the grief was knowing I did everything possible and that we had lost precious weeks to contact our father because of how evil my stepmother was, I mean who informs a man's children that he is on his deathbed by letter? Who does that? I just had to forgive myself and it took the good part of a year for that to happen. I haven't heard from either of my brothers since, I did send the one who initially called me a picture of our oldest son so he could see his nephew but there has been no contact since. Sad really, I know my mother would not have wanted the family she helped create to turn out this way.

I’m so sorry Stephanie and you are strong and courageous. A wonderful role model for your children. They are lucky to have you. I’ve said that before and I mean it. (((Hugs))).
 

YadaYadaYada

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Thanks so much Missy and House Cat. I just hope that maybe someone who feels guilt over a death will maybe read this and be able to forgive themselves. It's a hard thing to do because we can be so hard on ourselves but then we just remain stuck and it becomes a destructive cycle.
 

MamaBee

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I’ve have had quite a few...and I can’t pick just one experience as the most traumatic..but I think this one most people would find it to be..
DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE THE LEAST BIT SQUEAMISH!
My brother committed suicide at my mom’s house. I had to clean the room after he shot himself. The coroners office couldn’t do it...so I took a few gulps of alcohol (I didn’t drink) and cleaned the room. I would have had PTSD if not that I had to fly back home to take care of my autistic son who was a major handful at the time. I believe the fact that my son needed me whole kept me from breaking apart from that experience.
 

missy

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I’ve have had quite a few...and I can’t pick just one experience as the most traumatic..but I think this one most people would find it to be..
DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE THE LEAST BIT SQUEAMISH!
My brother committed suicide at my mom’s house. I had to clean the room after he shot himself. The coroners office couldn’t do it...so I took a few gulps of alcohol (I didn’t drink) and cleaned the room. I would have had PTSD if not that I had to fly back home to take care of my autistic son who was a major handful at the time. I believe the fact that my son needed me whole kept me from breaking apart from that experience.

Joanne, I’m so sorry and you amaze me. The fact that you took care of the cleanup is a testament to your bravery and fortitude. And yes I so agree that having others who need us is what can save us too. You are one of the strongest people I know.
 

Ally T

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@StephanieLynn and @Mamabean You are both amazing & courageous ladies. Big hugs to both of you.

I have shared here before about the horrific & sudden death of my ordinarily fit & healthy father back in 2001, so I won't go over it again as even to this day, it's very raw & can bring me to tears in a jiffy. But hands down for me it was that. I wouldn't have wished that experience on my worst enemy.
 

MamaBee

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Joanne, I’m so sorry and you amaze me. The fact that you took care of the cleanup is a testament to your bravery and fortitude. And yes I so agree that having others who need us is what can save us too. You are one of the strongest people I know.
Thanks @missy It was a long time ago...I’m not sure if I could do it now. I was younger and stronger then.
 

missy

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Thanks @missy It was a long time ago...I’m not sure if I could do it now. I was younger and stronger then.

I hear you on that. I’ve often wondered how much more we can endure. We all have breaking points after all. But I also believe we do what we can and that’s more than we give ourselves credit for and generally we rise to the challenge/occasion. So fwiw I think yes you could and would. But praying you will never experience as traumatic an event. (((Hugs)))
 

Matata

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Life in its infinite variations is the most stressful and traumatic thing any of us will experience. Life makes us and it breaks us. Life brings beauty, love, joy, compassion, appreciation, laughter, hope. It brings sadness, hate, loneliness, frustration, pain, fear, despair, death. Many lament that "life is not fair" as if it has sentience and ordains whose life will be easy and whose will be hard. Others search for "purpose" as though living the best life one can and being the best person one can be is insufficient. Life is a game of chance built upon trial and error, the flimsiness of personal experience, and the serendipity of unforeseeable behaviors and actions of others -- that's what makes it traumatic and stressful and the only thing we can control is how we adapt, and that's what makes it scary.
 

missy

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Life in its infinite variations is the most stressful and traumatic thing any of us will experience. Life makes us and it breaks us. Life brings beauty, love, joy, compassion, appreciation, laughter, hope. It brings sadness, hate, loneliness, frustration, pain, fear, despair, death. Many lament that "life is not fair" as if it has sentience and ordains whose life will be easy and whose will be hard. Others search for "purpose" as though living the best life one can and being the best person one can be is insufficient. Life is a game of chance built upon trial and error, the flimsiness of personal experience, and the serendipity of unforeseeable behaviors and actions of others -- that's what makes it traumatic and stressful and the only thing we can control is how we adapt, and that's what makes it scary.

Agree completely. In fact I wrote something similar a few days ago in response to @Jambalaya


Yes so true. My parents taught us life is not fair. Deal with it and make the best of it. As I grew older I truly realized that one can make a hell of heaven and a heaven of hell. Attitude and perception make all the difference. It cannot cure all one's ills but it goes a long way in making life sweeter. You cannot control everything but you can control your reaction to all things.
 

Ally T

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Life in its infinite variations is the most stressful and traumatic thing any of us will experience. Life makes us and it breaks us. Life brings beauty, love, joy, compassion, appreciation, laughter, hope. It brings sadness, hate, loneliness, frustration, pain, fear, despair, death. Many lament that "life is not fair" as if it has sentience and ordains whose life will be easy and whose will be hard. Others search for "purpose" as though living the best life one can and being the best person one can be is insufficient. Life is a game of chance built upon trial and error, the flimsiness of personal experience, and the serendipity of unforeseeable behaviors and actions of others -- that's what makes it traumatic and stressful and the only thing we can control is how we adapt, and that's what makes it scary.

I love the way you have verbalised this - it's very eloquent & oh so true.
 

yssie

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Life in its infinite variations is the most stressful and traumatic thing any of us will experience. Life makes us and it breaks us. Life brings beauty, love, joy, compassion, appreciation, laughter, hope. It brings sadness, hate, loneliness, frustration, pain, fear, despair, death. Many lament that "life is not fair" as if it has sentience and ordains whose life will be easy and whose will be hard. Others search for "purpose" as though living the best life one can and being the best person one can be is insufficient. Life is a game of chance built upon trial and error, the flimsiness of personal experience, and the serendipity of unforeseeable behaviors and actions of others -- that's what makes it traumatic and stressful and the only thing we can control is how we adapt, and that's what makes it scary.

I've had my "life isn't fair" moments. Some of them were over things that actually mattered.

What gets me through without actively nursing resentment and anger is conviction that "the universe" has enough sentience to ensure that those who wrong me - and mine - and any other people and animals who can't defend themselves... will get what's coming to them, whether by my hand or not. I need to believe that some authority will remit justice as deserved, and I'm grateful, for my own sanity, that I don't feel any compulsion to be that entity.
 

lyra

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My father's death was the first most traumatic event. He was 52, I was 23. It was a shocking thing, and it took me 10 full years to come to terms with it. Two years later I had an extremely traumatic childbirth with my first daughter. Lots of doctor error and it's a miracle she survived. Later, my mom died, then my brother. I have a ton of trauma and stress. I do have a therapist though. I've been seeing different ones since I was 30. It's great to have a mostly neutral person to talk to, who of course knows exactly what they're doing too.
 

ZestfullyBling

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@StephanieLynn , @Mamabean , @luv2sparkle. It's an honor to be among such strong women. Sending you long tight hugs.

I will share my most tragic event. It may be graphic for some. My apologies up front. For some reason it helps to share. Thank you @missy for this.

When I was nine my mom and I were holding hands walking into a grocery store and she caught a stray bullet in her temple (head). She instantly fell down and blood came out of her nose like water from a running faucet. ( I can see it like it was yesterday. An image that will always be with me) she died instantly.

6yrs later my dad was diagnosed with skin cancer and I watched his demise as years progressed until his death when I was 18.

In between that I'm the oldest siblings. Both my younger siblings were chronic asthmatics. I was solely responsible for taking care of them until my dad remarried when I was eleven.
When my dad remarried, he told me "this is your new mom". It was an unspoken rule but I was not allowed to mention my mother in the house. My dad acted like she didn't exist. Me and my siblings were mentally and emotionally abused by both step mom and dad during his 2nd marriage. My patience ran thin watching my dad wither away and dealing with stepmom, the emotional aspect was too much. So I moved out and into my grannies house at 16.

I have not gotten over watching my parents die before my very eyes. One instantly and the other slowly. It's a daily struggle. I have been to numerous therapist since I was 9 and diagnosed with PTSD. I have even been on and off medication over the years.

What helps me cope is constantly reminding myself literally daily (as one of my psychologist said I have to do) of the loving people I have in my life now. Wonderful husband, beautiful son (inside and out), my siblings ( we are extremely close), the awesome friendships I have cultivated over the years, and the support of PS buddies.
 

YadaYadaYada

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@ZestfullyBling, there are few things I can think of more horrific than watching your mother die right in front of you. I am so sorry you had to go through that AND lost your father within such a short window.

I was not allowed to mention my mom and there were no pictures in the house of her when my dad remarried either because it would "make Stepmother uncomfortable". Seriously WTF talk about dysfunction at its finest.

Also @Mamabean Im so sorry for the loss of your brother and what you had to deal with. Life can be so cruel.
 

Asscherhalo_lover

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I've had quite a few, but the most transformative happened when I was a teen. I had a close friend and a boyfriend betray me, with each other. I ended up hurting myself and it kind of shocked me. After that I no longer held other people above myself. I started to put myself first. It's the worst/best thing that ever happened to me. I basically turned my life around and that was the beginning. I've had a lot of unusual traumatic things happen since then but I've always pushed through.
 

MMtwo

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This thread holds so many heartbreaking stories. Hugs to all. I know we don't KNOW each other in real-life, but if you were close enough, I would want to hug each and every one of you.

Personally, my worst was homelessness shortly after leaving an abusive marriage. I had parental malfunction issues as a child too. My mother was never a mother that was there for us in a deeper sense. The story is very long, but looking back almost 20 years later, I am so grateful for those that supported me when I was the most fragile. Those that took time to help me restore balance, safety, resources, mental health.

Some of it I wish never happened. But some of it (in my situation) was partly my fault because I wasn't making wise choices. Until I learned this little part, I was constantly in turmoil, depression, and conflict. The Universe seemed to have a short period of throwing everything at me. I found the serenity prayer. I measured everything carefully to try to figure out what I could control and let go of what I couldn't. It did bring me peace and healing in time. I still have scars that show up sometimes, but I accept those too, as well as I can and move through the best that I can. This just works for me.
 

luv2sparkle

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@ZestfullyBling, I am so glad that you shared and that it helps you to talk about it. Watching your parents die is truly awful and to have your mom die in such a way in front of you could not be more scarring. No child should have to go through that. I am so happy for you that you have made your family into what makes you happy. I remind myself the same daily. I have a similar family story as you, and somehow I was blessed with a wonderful husband and children I am really close to. It makes up for my completely disfunctional and distant birth family. Like so many of us here, I could write a book about them and the pain they caused but it would be a terrible read.

I am always amazed by the way we humans hurt each other. I read some of the stories here and it is stunning the ways that life hurts and that so many here have overcome it. I am humbled by your tenacity and strength and so glad you all have shared.
Please know that my previous comments about this subject apply only to myself. I do not feel that anyone here is looking for sympathy in any way shape or form. I just get tired of my own story.

I wish we were sitting around a table sharing and I could get up and give you all a big hug.
 

dk168

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Easy, relocation from London to my home in Wiltshire, involving selling of my flat and buying a property.

There were issues with the flat, in that the previous owner removed a partial wall without permission.

I was not aware of this, and it took a long time to resolve, including inspections and chipping away plasters to look for a non existent vent.

It did not help that I was already living away with my late partner in his rented accommodation and he gave notice to move out before I was able to move into my new house.

On top of that, the lawyer handling the conveyance was an arrogant AH.

Everything was knocked out by about 5 months, and I felt really sorry from the old couple whose house I was buying so I offered them more money as compensation.

Once the purchase was completed, I had the house gutted and refitted, and lived in B&Bs for nearly a month.

I had to put up with my late partner about mis-management of the conveyance all that time.

All that was 1.5y after I had another relocation, moving out of my marital home with my then husband back to my own flat in London.

I had a new kitchen installed, supposed to be in time for Christmas, however it did not go according to plan, and my late partner and I spent Christmas Eve moving in and scrubbing the flat clean until the small hours of Christmas Day.

In 2005, I was living at my flat and working at the nearest hospital in the area when the bus bomb of 7/7 went off about 200m up the road from the block where my flat was.

The hospital where I worked turned into an A&E as it was the closest medical facility. No one was allowed out for our safety. Its restaurants and canteen ran out of food and people inside were understandably very scared and confused.

I also had shingles at the time, unbeknown to me, and was in a lot of pain, however I worked the day without stopping.

I had to prove to the police I lived in the block before I could pass the cordon.

My car was parked within 50m of the tube station where there was another bomb, resulting in my car being part of a crime scene and I was not able to get to it.

On top of that, my dad died the next day after the bus bomb.

Even though a lot happened to me in the days around the 7/7 bombing, it was nothing compared with the stress that was my relocation from London to Wiltshire.

I swore I would not move again, and that was in 2006.

How did I get over it? I don't know, just get on with it I guess, thinking it would be over one day.

I did have a domestic with my late partner not long after moving into my house, ended up with him spending the night in a police cell.

He moved out afterwards, and we did make up.

He later apologised for being mean to me when the project of his own custom build house boat was delayed by months.

Give me deaths (my dad and late partner), new jobs (many times), and divorce (just the once) any time. Just don't ask me to move again.

DK :rolleyes:
 

Arkteia

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So far - when my parents were poisoned and nearly died. If was many years ago, and I am positive that it was by mistake, and also, that my mom’s subsequent leukemia was related to it. Luckily, they survived. The source is known, the situation will forever remain a mystery. It was 30 years ago, so I was younger and healthier to help them out. My dad, the smartie, diagnosed himself.
 

MamaBee

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@StephanieLynn , @Mamabean , @luv2sparkle. It's an honor to be among such strong women. Sending you long tight hugs.

I will share my most tragic event. It may be graphic for some. My apologies up front. For some reason it helps to share. Thank you @missy for this.

When I was nine my mom and I were holding hands walking into a grocery store and she caught a stray bullet in her temple (head). She instantly fell down and blood came out of her nose like water from a running faucet. ( I can see it like it was yesterday. An image that will always be with me) she died instantly.

6yrs later my dad was diagnosed with skin cancer and I watched his demise as years progressed until his death when I was 18.

In between that I'm the oldest siblings. Both my younger siblings were chronic asthmatics. I was solely responsible for taking care of them until my dad remarried when I was eleven.
When my dad remarried, he told me "this is your new mom". It was an unspoken rule but I was not allowed to mention my mother in the house. My dad acted like she didn't exist. Me and my siblings were mentally and emotionally abused by both step mom and dad during his 2nd marriage. My patience ran thin watching my dad wither away and dealing with stepmom, the emotional aspect was too much. So I moved out and into my grannies house at 16.

I have not gotten over watching my parents die before my very eyes. One instantly and the other slowly. It's a daily struggle. I have been to numerous therapist since I was 9 and diagnosed with PTSD. I have even been on and off medication over the years.

What helps me cope is constantly reminding myself literally daily (as one of my psychologist said I have to do) of the loving people I have in my life now. Wonderful husband, beautiful son (inside and out), my siblings ( we are extremely close), the awesome friendships I have cultivated over the years, and the support of PS buddies.
I’m so sorry @ZestfullyBling...How horrifying to have it happen..but also that you witnessed it as a child..Big hugs to you..
 

MamaBee

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@ZestfullyBling, there are few things I can think of more horrific than watching your mother die right in front of you. I am so sorry you had to go through that AND lost your father within such a short window.

I was not allowed to mention my mom and there were no pictures in the house of her when my dad remarried either because it would "make Stepmother uncomfortable". Seriously WTF talk about dysfunction at its finest.

Also @Mamabean Im so sorry for the loss of your brother and what you had to deal with. Life can be so cruel.
Thank you @StephanieLynn Big hugs to you..I’m relieved that you know it wasn’t your fault because your step-mother wrote a letter instead of calling you. Unforgivable...
 

missy

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@ZestfullyBling I am so sorry. What a horror.:cry: I am glad you find sharing helpful. To have come through that and not only survive but thrive is nothing short of amazing. You are so courageous and strong and an inspiration to all those around you.

And like @luv2sparkle I wish we could be there for you in person and give you a hug. Even though we only know each other from PS I feel like I know you. And to know you IRL would be an honor. Sending you healing hugs and best wishes for a happy future filled with only peace and love and all you could ever hope for and bling of course.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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53,978
So far - when my parents were poisoned and nearly died. If was many years ago, and I am positive that it was by mistake, and also, that my mom’s subsequent leukemia was related to it. Luckily, they survived. The source is known, the situation will forever remain a mystery. It was 30 years ago, so I was younger and healthier to help them out. My dad, the smartie, diagnosed himself.

OMG how scary. Thank goodness your parents survived and that your dad figured it out before it was too late. It sounds like it should be on a Dateline or 48 hours Mystery special. Thank goodness it has a happy ending.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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@dk168 wow. And goes to show the resiliency of the human spirit I guess. We take a picking but we keep on going.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jun 8, 2008
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I am always amazed by the way we humans hurt each other. I read some of the stories here and it is stunning the ways that life hurts and that so many here have overcome it. I am humbled by your tenacity and strength and so glad you all have shared.

Yes to all of this.
 
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