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What can I do when the ring is not the right one?

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hthip

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 27, 2008
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FI proposed with ring purchased from "Family Jeweler" that was very lenient with exchange policy until FI called to ask about making the exchange. We have our wedding to pay for, so we don''t have any funds to buy another one. Is my only option to sell it on e-bay or craigslist and take a lost and buy a new e-ring?

The ring is a 1ct princess cut solitiare. I was okay that it wasn''t the cushion cut I wanted until I started asking him how he decided on the purchase. I wanted him to share with me how much research he did, how much he learned about diamonds, and how much he prided himself on this ring. I really wanted him to sell me on this princess cut over the cushion he knew I preferred. In short, the ring was a purchase of convenience. I was so hurt I started picking that ring apart to the point that I have not worn it since the day after he proposed in October. It''s sitting in a safe deposit box. It just hurt that much.

I ask that this post not be about what should have been done, but what options do I have now?
 
Date: 6/26/2008 4:27:39 AM
Author:hthip
FI proposed with ring purchased from ''Family Jeweler'' that was very lenient with exchange policy until FI called to ask about making the exchange. We have our wedding to pay for, so we don''t have any funds to buy another one. Is my only option to sell it on e-bay or craigslist and take a lost and buy a new e-ring?

The ring is a 1ct princess cut solitiare. I was okay that it wasn''t the cushion cut I wanted until I started asking him how he decided on the purchase. I wanted him to share with me how much research he did, how much he learned about diamonds, and how much he prided himself on this ring. I really wanted him to sell me on this princess cut over the cushion he knew I preferred. In short, the ring was a purchase of convenience. I was so hurt I started picking that ring apart to the point that I have not worn it since the day after he proposed in October. It''s sitting in a safe deposit box. It just hurt that much.

I ask that this post not be about what should have been done, but what options do I have now?
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I''m sorry to hear you don''t like your ring and I understand why you would feel hurt. First off, I''m not sure how much assistance I''ll be able to provide but if you could explain a little more about the "family jeweler" that may help. So, the ring was purchased in October? What was the exchange policy? What exactly happened with this jeweler? If they have an exchange policy why was it that they wouldn''t honorr it? Was this a verbal commitment? Maybe there is a lot more detail you aren''t sharing on this however if it were me I wouldn''t let this go.

You''ll likely not get what the ring is worth selling it to a jeweler or on e-bay. I''m not an expert but I''d see if you could take it to the "family jeweler" in exchange for some type of upgrade. It doesn''t have to be much but maybe it would work. Don''t know without more detail.
 
I''m sorry to hear about your ring.
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If I were you, I would go talk to the "jeweler". If he says there is no exchange policy now, press him as to why not, as there was before. That''s not right to lock you into a purchase you didn''t make, and you don''t care for. Tell him an honorable jeweler wouldn''t do that. If you get somewhere, give him the specs you want for the cushion, and the grading reports you prefer, and see what he can find. If he finds something, great. If not, I would try craigslist or Ebay for selling it and starting over.
 
Date: 6/26/2008 7:30:24 AM
Author: Ellen
I''m sorry to hear about your ring.
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If I were you, I would go talk to the ''jeweler''. If he says there is no exchange policy now, press him as to why not, as there was before. That''s not right to lock you into a purchase you didn''t make, and you don''t care for. Tell him an honorable jeweler wouldn''t do that. If you get somewhere, give him the specs you want for the cushion, and the grading reports you prefer, and see what he can find. If he finds something, great. If not, I would try craigslist or Ebay for selling it and starting over.
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All great advice Ellen. I would only add this: Did you actually speak to the jeweler to confirm that the ring was actually purchased there and that he wouldn''t honor the exchange? How sure are you that the ring was even purchased there at all?
 

Hiya,

Sorry to hear about your dilemma…..


Form a guys perspective, I would be devastated if my other half didn’t like the ring – not because she SHOULD like it, but I would be SOOOOO disappointed in myself for getting it wrong – I have put somewhere between 6-9 months worth of research into my ring, including untold secret questions and showing her things in jewelers just to get the ideas/design right! Plus a one month process of selecting the right diamond….and millions of hour scrolloing through pricescope gleaning advice!!


Anyway, I would suggest that you talk to him about it – I am sure that he will understand that he perhaps didn’t really listen to what you were after.


If it were me (ie if I were him) I would do anything to make sure you got the eventual ring that you wanted!!!!! After all, you will be wearing it for a LONG time…..


I don’t know much about the value of your ring/diamond or your preferences of your budget, but I feel like, if it were me, I’d sell it somewhere and use the money to purchase through one of the PS online vendor to maximise what you get for your money……maybe even send him into the jewelers with a sob story about how you had broken up – to see if he can recoup as much money as possible.


Also, perhaps you can explain it to him as you guys working together on a new ring – in making the decisions and getting it perfect for what you want..choosing the diamond, setting, materials etc etc that way it might bring you closer together, make the process a little more special, remove the sour taste of the ‘wrong’ ring, and give you a story you can cherish and pass on to your children one day!!


Best of luck!


Diamond Joe
 
So....is the diamond a good quality stone? Do you like how the ring looks on your finger?

Your post seems to indicate that you liked it until you found out that your fiancee did not put "enough" time and energy into the purchase. Not sure it that''s the reality, but its what I perceived from your post.

To me this sounds like it is not about the ring at all, but much deeper issues that you two should be discussing.
 
I would have also been upset if I had expressed a preference of a cushion and got a princess! One is old and classic and the other is more modern...totally different styles. As others have said, I''d try to go to the jeweler in person...which should have been done immediately. If he won''t take it for a trade in, then you''ll have to get an appraisal and try to sell it, but you''ll be lucky to get half of what he paid. But I''d go ahead and start over and you pick out the stone this time.
 
Date: 6/26/2008 8:02:00 PM
Author: marchswallowbird



To me this sounds like it is not about the ring at all, but much deeper issues that you two should be discussing.
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I agree with this.
 
It is completely possible for your FI to love you deeply, but to be completely uninterested in learning about diamonds. I have been married to such a man for 33 years. He learned to just let me buy my own jewelry (or to pick it from a preselected list that I give to him).

If your jeweler won''t work with you to get the cushion you want, I''d wait on getting a replacement ring until you two have the money saved up for what you want. It can be for an anniversary sometime in the future. In the meantime you can sell the ring that you have, and pick out a nice blingy wedding band.

Best wishes to both of you!
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To glean the crucial bits from other posters: 1. If he knew you really wanted a different style, but basically decided that convenience was worth more than your wants, I''d ask how "convenience" is defined.
2. He doesn''t have to be educated in diamonds to get the cut right. He could ASK the jeweler.
3. Contrary to a previous poster, you sound as if you did not like the stone, but wanted to like it for his sake - if he fell in love with it and thought ''Gee, she''ll LOVE this!''. Doesn''t sound like that was the case, either - he did not fall in love with it, but saw it, thought ''the heck with it, the price is right, I''m here, I''ll just get it.''
You need to find out if that was the case.

If so, yeah, re other posters, you''ve got a much more serious problem than not liking the stone. If he didn''t care what you wanted, you were getting what he decided, you need to find out, like, yesterday. The therapist in me asks, "Is this part of an ongoing pattern?"
Good luck.
 
I''m sorry to hear you don''t like your ring and I understand why you would feel hurt. First off, I''m not sure how much assistance I''ll be able to provide but if you could explain a little more about the ''family jeweler'' that may help. So, the ring was purchased in October? What was the exchange policy? What exactly happened with this jeweler? If they have an exchange policy why was it that they wouldn''t honorr it? Was this a verbal commitment? Maybe there is a lot more detail you aren''t sharing on this however if it were me I wouldn''t let this go.
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My FI went to a jeweler that his brother-in-law recommended. I guess his family has gone to this jeweler for all their diamonds. My FI felt he was in good hands and was easily sold on the ring. Only verbally did he say that the ring can be exchanged if I didn''t like it. He never mentioned a time restraint. When FI called (the jeweler is 2 hours away) to ask to have it exchanged he said it was too late. The supplier he got the diamond from wouldn''t take it back so he couldn''t take it back. We have nothing in writing.

It is partially my fault I let 3 weeks go by before I gave my FI heat about not calling or didn''t call this guy myself. I thought because we were referred by a regular that he would work with us but he wouldn''t. This mistake is now going to cost us.
 
Date: 6/26/2008 10:01:37 AM
Author: Isabelle


All great advice Ellen. I would only add this: Did you actually speak to the jeweler to confirm that the ring was actually purchased there and that he wouldn''t honor the exchange? How sure are you that the ring was even purchased there at all?
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Yes, we called. He remebered my FI. We still have the receipt and report that the diamond came with.
 
Daimond Joe - We''ve talked about my issues with the ring. Im sure his feelings were hurt, but he understands where I''m coming from.

He is working saving so I can pick out a replacement ring and knows he''s going to take a loss. I definitley plan on doing as much research as you did before we buy another ring. I assumed my guy would take pride in putting the effort in finding the ring like you have, but he''s just not that guy. I have accepted it, and I will be spending a lot of time on PS doing research. I didn''t want to do this in the beginning because I didn''t want to be dissappointed if he couldn''t afford what I really wanted. As I am learning more about daimonds here, a part of me want to get out that diamond report to compare, but I might just get myself all upset again if he was overcharged!

Do stores really buy sob stories?
 
Some guys just don't get it. My fiance proposed with a .24 ct. round diamond set into a solitaire (neither of which I liked; at the time, I wanted a marquise set into a baguette band). I have since spent years trying to find "my ring" and have finally found it after 16 years of marriage. My husband now knows not to pick out jewelry for me!

Having said all that, I am planning on setting my marquise into a pendant. Can you do the same for your princess and start over with a new center diamond, preferably from a Pricescope vendor that has an awesome upgrade policy, like the one from GoodOldGold.com? Just a thought. I know it is disappointing. We spend so much time dreaming about our engagement rings, and are let down when reality doesn't match the fantasy!

If you like cushions, I suggest you contact GoodOldGold.com about their "Cushettes". They are gorgeous cushions with extra factes that really sparkle. I almost got one when comparing that to my Jubilee. They are stunning! There is a men's ring here on PS with a .39 ct. Cushette that looks great just to give you an idea of what they look like.

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/boone-diamond-tension-ring-for-a-guy.22652/

They don't post them on their site but you can always call and ask about them.
 
Well, I hope Doctork is reading this thread...

Listen, all is not lost. If you go to a reputable place, they should offer you something for your ring as a trade in, assuming it''s of decent quality. So you can try to sell it, but you''ll need an independent appraisal so buyers will know what they''re getting. I''d try to trade it in at a good place. I dont know if places like GOG give credit for trade ins on stones not bought from them but I think it''s worth asking Jon. Good luck!
 
Date: 6/26/2008 9:22:20 PM
Author: needmorediamonds
To glean the crucial bits from other posters: 1. If he knew you really wanted a different style, but basically decided that convenience was worth more than your wants, I''d ask how ''convenience'' is defined.
2. He doesn''t have to be educated in diamonds to get the cut right. He could ASK the jeweler.
3. Contrary to a previous poster, you sound as if you did not like the stone, but wanted to like it for his sake - if he fell in love with it and thought ''Gee, she''ll LOVE this!''. Doesn''t sound like that was the case, either - he did not fall in love with it, but saw it, thought ''the heck with it, the price is right, I''m here, I''ll just get it.''
You need to find out if that was the case.

If so, yeah, re other posters, you''ve got a much more serious problem than not liking the stone. If he didn''t care what you wanted, you were getting what he decided, you need to find out, like, yesterday. The therapist in me asks, ''Is this part of an ongoing pattern?''
Good luck.
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Marchswallowbird, Diamondseeker2006, Isabelle, Flygirl, and needmorediamonds you guys have it right. The princess wasn''t the perferred daimond, but I would have worn proudly if he had put some love put into its purchase.

Needmorediamonds -
1) "Convenience" - I don''t want to go into the details. Let''s just say he rushed to buy my ring after having me wait 1.5 years (for him to save up money) so he can spend around the same amount of money on something he felt was once in a lifetime.
2/3) He went to recommended jeweler with sister and mother (neither knows my taste nor were they on my people to consult list). He didn''t see any cushion cut that I would want, so with the help of his sister and mom he picked out the ring he thought I would like and purchased it. Didn''t put in any more effort or energy to shop around for that cushion cut diamond since the ring can be exchanged and he was on a time restraint.

I think most of you will agree this last one is a definite DONT when you are shopping for an e-ring. The ring is a replica of his sisters. Let''s not go too deep into the psych books on that one, she was there to help pick out the ring.

Thank you everyone for your understanding and advice. I am accepting that this is our fault for not acting soon enough. My FI will have to take the loss for this though. In the meantime, my other dilemma is that I haven''t worn the ring and nobody knows the real reason why. If asked, I have said that the ring is being set or it''s too loose. I can''t look at my e-ring and want to wear it. I don''t think anybody would understand and will only see me as an ungrateful person. I would be happy to just get a bling wedding band from my e-ring.
 
Date: 6/26/2008 11:14:14 PM
Author: hthip

Date: 6/26/2008 9:22:20 PM
Author: needmorediamonds
To glean the crucial bits from other posters: 1. If he knew you really wanted a different style, but basically decided that convenience was worth more than your wants, I''d ask how ''convenience'' is defined.
2. He doesn''t have to be educated in diamonds to get the cut right. He could ASK the jeweler.
3. Contrary to a previous poster, you sound as if you did not like the stone, but wanted to like it for his sake - if he fell in love with it and thought ''Gee, she''ll LOVE this!''. Doesn''t sound like that was the case, either - he did not fall in love with it, but saw it, thought ''the heck with it, the price is right, I''m here, I''ll just get it.''
You need to find out if that was the case.

If so, yeah, re other posters, you''ve got a much more serious problem than not liking the stone. If he didn''t care what you wanted, you were getting what he decided, you need to find out, like, yesterday. The therapist in me asks, ''Is this part of an ongoing pattern?''
Good luck.
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Marchswallowbird, Diamondseeker2006, Isabelle, Flygirl, and needmorediamonds you guys have it right. The princess wasn''t the perferred daimond, but I would have worn proudly if he had put some love put into its purchase.

Needmorediamonds -
1) ''Convenience'' - I don''t want to go into the details. Let''s just say he rushed to buy my ring after having me wait 1.5 years (for him to save up money) so he can spend around the same amount of money on something he felt was once in a lifetime.
2/3) He went to recommended jeweler with sister and mother (neither knows my taste nor were they on my people to consult list). He didn''t see any cushion cut that I would want, so with the help of his sister and mom he picked out the ring he thought I would like and purchased it. Didn''t put in any more effort or energy to shop around for that cushion cut diamond since the ring can be exchanged and he was on a time restraint.

I think most of you will agree this last one is a definite DONT when you are shopping for an e-ring. The ring is a replica of his sisters. Let''s not go too deep into the psych books on that one, she was there to help pick out the ring.

Thank you everyone for your understanding and advice. I am accepting that this is our fault for not acting soon enough. My FI will have to take the loss for this though. In the meantime, my other dilemma is that I haven''t worn the ring and nobody knows the real reason why. If asked, I have said that the ring is being set or it''s too loose. I can''t look at my e-ring and want to wear it. I don''t think anybody would understand and will only see me as an ungrateful person. I would be happy to just get a bling wedding band from my e-ring.
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Without going too deep, I must say this convinced me. I don''t need to hear anymore. The man should be some variation of flogged, horsewhipped, or just given 50 lashes with a wet noodle for not realizing this would be a big no-no.

I don''t mind having a ring that is similar to someone else''s. I would not want that to be someone I saw all the time. Ouch!!!! Not to mention it''s NOT THE CUSHION YOU REQUESTED!!!!!!! It''s the princess his mother and sister thought you''d like instead because none of them wanted to go any further out of their way than they had already gone.
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Well, okay. sorry about that. I think I had a flashback for a moment. I''m better now.


I would talk to FI and see if there''s anyone else that shops with this jeweler who would be willing to give him a call and see if anything could be done. You know, power in numbers, or misery loves company or something like that.

shay
 
Point 0. Come up with an answer that you can say to deflect any further inquiries regarding the engagement ring. Whatever you think you can muster. "Didn''t suit me." "We decided to concentrate on the wedding expenses." "It was a temp setting, we are working on a new one." "Oh it was sweet but not my style." (or even, "it met an unfortunate demise," if you have to.)

1. Look into options that involve a jeweler taking this off your hands. Consignment or trade-in. This should get you more $ than ebay or craigslist.

2. If 1 doesn''t work, ebay or craigslist. And given your budget constraints, and the fact that you will take a substantial loss, I personally would go for a completely blingy fabulous wedding band and extract a promise from your FI for a well-deserved, jointly-picked beautiful, wonderful cushion on some agreed-upon specific future anniversary. (Not the generic "some" future anniversary.)

You have enough on your plates, get a nice blingy wedding band for now and get your cushion later.
 
Date: 6/26/2008 10:11:37 PM
Author: surfgirl
Well, I hope Doctork is reading this thread...

Listen, all is not lost. If you go to a reputable place, they should offer you something for your ring as a trade in, assuming it's of decent quality. So you can try to sell it, but you'll need an independent appraisal so buyers will know what they're getting. I'd try to trade it in at a good place. I dont know if places like GOG give credit for trade ins on stones not bought from them but I think it's worth asking Jon. Good luck!
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I agree with surfgirl. If you trade up, a jeweler may well be interested in doing business with you. If you had the princess stone reset so it was no longer a replica of FI's sister's ring, would that make a difference? We would happily help you find another setting, if you think this could be an option.
 
I agree with Cara, don''t worry about explaining the reason you don''t want to wear the ring to other people. They don''t need to know any details. Just tell them it didn''t suit you and that the two of you are picking out a different ring together (even if this is stretching the truth a bit). It''s none of their business why you''re not wearing the first ring.

Good luck!
 
So I''ll look into finding an independent appraiser and go from there. Thanks guys/gals!

risingsun-thanks for the offer on finding me a setting, but I''m not feeling the stone at all.
 
hi hthip,
you have received some great advice here and i can''t add to it. but i do want to share with you from an emotional view that i understand where you are coming from..
when my dh bought my engagement ring, it was from a "family jeweler" as well. i was in love with him, knew nothing about diamonds except that they sparkled, and i would love to have a 1 ct round stone, whixh is what i received.
well, on christmas eve, i received my proposal and ring, but later discovered from dh that my he had taken a (female) co-worker with him , when he picked the ring up, apparently he was sooo excited that he let HER try it on(this was a peer of his at his first "real" job post-university, we were young, just out of school, dh and the girl were big flirts with each other) and when i found out, i was crushed. yes, it is a little intrinsic to my dh''s behavior to be bone-headed and not very sensitive and also willing to impress others over me.
that said, the ring became a big contention between us because being young and immature, i pouted. so we had the ring reset into a lovely channel setting, got the matching band...
but about 13 years later, i still wasn''t feeling it...i always looked at that ring and even said to dh on occasion, "you should have just married karen", the girl who had tried on MY ring first. (what the h e double toothpicks was SHE thinking?
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) i know, very silly and dramatic but i couldn''t get over that he had taken a complete stranger and shared that with her(not even MY sister or My best friend, who dh knew both of them very well, before we were engaged as we all went to college together) so i finally upgraded and then upgraded again, and i also have some other gorgeous pieces that dh has neither chosen nor let other gals try on, but i do know that there was a LOT of emotion attached to that engagement and that early pd. of our future together.
i hope you and your fi get things sorted out-we have weathered much together in life, dh and i, have five glorious children, and although that memory of my ring still kind of stinks, after 21years+ of marriage, i am proud and thankful that we worked through that(and so many other) challenging times in our lives together. it is just a ring, but it is "the" ring and i hope you find the one that makes your heart sing very soon!
ps hope i did not offend in any way-that was not my intention-just wanted you to know that others have had disappointing engagement moments, too
 
Date: 6/27/2008 1:40:30 AM
Author: hthip
So I''ll look into finding an independent appraiser and go from there. Thanks guys/gals!


risingsun-thanks for the offer on finding me a setting, but I''m not feeling the stone at all.
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If he is truly sorry that this happened, and he really wants to make it up to you, then it is time to pull out the credit card and make it right, even if it takes some time to pay off. Call one of the PS vendors like WF or GOG and see if they will give you any credit for trading this diamond. It will be easier and less time consuming to do it that way, and you will probably get more credit than you ever would sell it for on Ebay or Craig''s list. (Do a search for "princess cut" on Ebay and see the hundreds of offerings you will be competing with. Not worth it. ) After you have settled on your vendor, I would get the cushion that you want and pay it off over time. There is nothing more you can do and you absolutely deserve a ring that you like. And he was absolutely wrong to disregard your feelings in favor of his mom and sister''s opinions, which couldn''t be more irrelevant to what sort of ring *you* like.
 
Date: 6/27/2008 9:54:12 AM
Author: Isabelle

Date: 6/27/2008 1:40:30 AM
Author: hthip
So I''ll look into finding an independent appraiser and go from there. Thanks guys/gals!


risingsun-thanks for the offer on finding me a setting, but I''m not feeling the stone at all.
Click to expand...

If he is truly sorry that this happened, and he really wants to make it up to you, then it is time to pull out the credit card and make it right, even if it takes some time to pay off. Call one of the PS vendors like WF or GOG and see if they will give you any credit for trading this diamond. It will be easier and less time consuming to do it that way, and you will probably get more credit than you ever would sell it for on Ebay or Craig''s list. (Do a search for ''princess cut'' on Ebay and see the hundreds of offerings you will be competing with. Not worth it. ) After you have settled on your vendor, I would get the cushion that you want and pay it off over time. There is nothing more you can do and you absolutely deserve a ring that you like. And he was absolutely wrong to disregard your feelings in favor of his mom and sister''s opinions, which couldn''t be more irrelevant to what sort of ring *you* like.
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Please don''t put any part of your ring purchase on a credit card--yes, he made a mistake, but you both shouldn''t have to pay for it by paying interest for months.

I think that Surfgirl gave great advice. If you know that exchanging it is no longer an option, find out what the upgrade policy is. If you already know you''re going to have to take a loss by selling it below what you paid, you may as well use that money towards an upgrade if possible. Some jewelers only require you to spend $1 on an upgrade whereas others have a less flexible upgrade policy. If you get any pushback from him, I would negotiate with him. Let''s say you guys planned on taking a $2,000 loss on the ring, why not tell him that you''re willing to spend $2,000 more on a ring if he takes this one back at full value. Then you both win.
 
To add to what NEL just said, I was also saying that you may very well be able to get a credit from someone other than the original jewelers...People trade in rings all the time at places where they didn''t get their original ring!
 
Well, what''s done is done and you can''t return the ring. Don''t sell it on Ebay or Craiglist, you''ll never get what you should for it. Call Bill Pearlman www.pearlmansjewelers.com he''s the only fair jewelry consignment person I know of. You send your ring to him, he lists it at what he feels is a fair price and that will move it (and he will confirm the price with you beforehand), it sells, he gets 25% and sends you a check for the rest. It''s easy, simple and safe.

Best of luck!
 
I am sorry that you are in this situation, I am sure that it is upsetting for you both. If I were you, I would see if the original jeweler has some sort of upgrade policy, and if not then see if another jeweler will let you trade it towards one of theirs. I think that these might be your best options in not losing too much of what your FI paid.

Is it just the ring that bothers you, or is it the stone as well? Do you think that you could be happy if it were reset into another setting?
 
This is hysterical. See what you started? This topic has taken on a life of its own!
Ok, so here''s what we ladies have to do.
Print off this entire string, and post it in some cosmic guy place, where it will become required reading "Pitfalls, Priorities, and Pandemonium - The RING" for every man in the universe who tries to buy an engagement ring. People NOT to consult? Your MOM. What NOT to do? Let some other woman try it on! What NOT to assume? ''Oh, she''ll love this just as much - she won''t know the difference''. Hey - I''m only half-joking. Ok, the main thing is love and relationship and all that - but you gotta love your ring, too.
 
I feel your pain! But all is not lost, don't give up on your FI just yet. When I got engaged, dh gave me a 1.5 ct rb solitaire. Meanwhile whenever he would ask me what kind of shape of diamond earrings or bracelets I liked, I would always emphasize that I love princess cut diamonds and that I hated rounds. So just imagine my surprise when I said yes and he put that ring on my finger
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. But I never said anything and was just happy to be engaged until he started noticing that I was embarrassed to show my ring to people when we told them that we got engaged and I would turn my ring around so that people wouldn't see the diamond. When he finally asked me if I actually liked the ring, i fessed up and truly felt like a brat about telling the truth! Now that I think about it, I should have said something immediately so that we could have returned it and now I don't think I should have felt bad about not liking the ring because he knew that I didn't like rb's from the start and should have been mad that he was essentially forcing me to wear a diamond that only he liked, when the engagement should have been about us (actually should have been about me!=0 ) so anyway, long story short, to my surprise, he bought me another ring - an asscher, a shape that we both love - as a wedding present. it took a while and alot of angst
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but he bit the bullet, took a loss and finally figured out that since I am the one wearing the ring, I should love my ring, not him! and so not to hurt his feelings and waste the other ring, I use it as a RHR

good luck, don't fret - there are ways you can fix things! reset the ring, get a new one or get a really fabulous wedding band and put the princess on your right hand =)
 
That is disappointing! I totally understand why you are upset. If you had never made your preference known or didn''t have strong preference that would be one thing but since he knew.... At least he is on board with changing it out. That "family jeweler" sounds a bit shady. If that jeweler really wants to continue to be the family jeweler it seems they would try to help you work it out. Especially with an e-ring that was bought without you getting to see it. I''m sure that happens all the time. An e-ring is worn for so long and usually as part of your every day jewelry so it is important you are happy with it. MyDH is not much into research either, not even for things he wants for himself so I don''t take it too personally. When I finally got my dream ring after 19 years of marriage, he happily let me do all the research. I hope you are able to get a ring you can love and that will represent your love for each other instead of be a reminder of some bad vibes like your current ring. FebruaryBride2003''s advice to check with Pearlman''s seems right on. I have seen several posts here about them as a great source for consignment. Good luck!

K
 
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