shape
carat
color
clarity

very bad situation...ATTN WEBDIVA

Mrs Jam - what a gift to see your sweet dear Gwennie! That is such an adorable gal and so obviously full of spunk and joy.
 
mrs jam said:
I'm so glad Gwenny's pictures help to ease your fears a bit! It will be ok, I promise. It will really take more getting used to for you than for her. Like Laurie wrote, I didn't notice Gwenny bumping into things anymore than she did before she lost her eye.

Dogs are amazingly resilient and quick to find joy. We can learn a lot from our fur babies!

This is why I love this forum
 
AN-Much of what I would say has already been said. Please don't blame yourself in any way. It was an accident, pure & simple.
From the pics you posted of them laying in bed together I'm sure they will have a great bond as Pumba matures. It will be okay. I have had a multi dog household for years with some dog aggression issues between adult dogs flaring up occassionally. Just know the triggers and prevent them from happening. In your case I do not think this was aggression based at all. Really just an accident.

As for Layla adjusting to life missing one eye, she will be fine! I have known many one eyed dogs and they act completely normal.
I had a german shepherd, Rowdy, who my dad gave me when he was 1 yr old. He loved to play frisbee and was phenominal at it. Could have done competitions. One day we noticed a red line across his eye & thought maybe my cat scratched him. took him to the vet and he was diagnosed with a genetic condition called pannas. It slowly corrodes the entire surface of the eye and there is no cure. We were given drops that slow the disease but were told he would eventually be blind in both eyes, probably by three yrs old.
That is of course what happened but he adjusted incredibly well. We still took him to the park to play frisbee and he still caught it 90% of the time. People couldn't believe he was blind. We think he sensed it, heard the frisbee slicing through the air. Rowdy lived a joyful, very happy life & never knew he couldn't see. Throughout his life we moved to a different house, I had my first child, always lots of activity going on. He never missed a beat. He lived in the moment.
Layla will be okay, you will be okay. Try to cheer up dear.
 
AN, I gave my pup extra hugs for Layla and Pumbaa! Hoping Layla's recovery goes well. From Mrs. Jam's experience, I am sure she will come out just fine and will be happy as always again in no time! I think because we are so used to seeing our dogs as our little babies, we sometimes forget how resilient they are. But they really are, so try to remember that. And please try not to blame yourself! I know how it is because our dog got half of her nose ripped off due to hooking herself on part of the grill when we were outside grilling one time. We blamed ourselves SO HARD for that. It seemed like something that we should have foreseen or been able to prevent, but then, we know tons of people with dogs and grills and no one else's dog has gotten injured on the grill. But you know what? At the end of the day, this horrible accident happened, but she is still alive and you still love her, and those are the things that count and will give her a happy life.

Mrs Jam - your Guinevere is so cute! I have a Guinevere too but she's a bunny. She looks about the same size as your dog though, lol.
 
AN, so sorry to hear this! You've received such good advice and so much support, thank goodness for PS! I am wishing you all comfort, strength and peace. I think everyone will be just fine. Lots of hugs.
 
Love the additional support everyone was able to give! :) thank you for your update earlier offline on your trainer, he sounds fantastic and your family of four is on the road to recovery with his support.
 
What a terrible thing to go through!!! I certainly feel for your pup, but I agree with what others have said--this is probably more traumatic for you than her. Its amazing how resilient animals are--wishing little Layla a speedy recovery, and wishing you comfort and some peace of mind. Xo
 
Oh, Im so sorry, AN!! From one pet owner to another, I really feel for you. But please know that this was NOT your fault. Little Layla will be ok...its Mama that is going to need the extra hugs!!! I will be thinking of you and hoping for the best in every way!!:)
 
Our two golden retrievers don't seem to have very good eye sight at all. When we take them to places where they can be let off the lead, they don't seem to be able to see us. They have very acute hearing though and this faculty seems much more useful to them, that and a darn good sniffing snout.

The moment I read your post I totally identified with how you felt, even down to the self-examination of how the situation came about. A few years ago one of our neighbours got a puppy and they showed it to our children. The puppy squirmed out of one of the children's hands, fell and broke it's leg. That was bad enough, later the vet said that the puppy must have fallen awkwardly and they said the dog would most probably have to have the leg amputated. They would perform the operation on the Monday after the weekend and see then. I just felt sick and in disbelief that this had happened, I couldn't concentrate on anything else the whole weekend. A very young puppy facing life with an amputated leg, it was not our dog and we were to blame for it happening. Thank goodness in the event they were able to save the leg, it came out thinner - now covered with long hair so you can't tell! It's living a great life and walks and runs with no difficulty. We're still on good terms with the owners who although upset were very good about it. I hope AN you can just gradually get yourself back to being ok.
 
I am so sorry. This is such a devastating event. I cried for you and your puppies. I rejoiced in seeing another dog healed with only one eye.

I am, however, confused as to why you are being encouraged to keep the dog situation as it is. I know this isn't an easy question right now, but why is everyone encouraging you to keep the pup? Shouldn't he be in a home with no other pets? I know everyone is saying accidents happen, but what if this isn't an accident? Personally, I wouldn't want to find out.

I have lived with a cocker spaniel who bit a person, his favorite person, and everyone thought it was a freak thing. Two months later, he bit her worse and scarred her for life. I know this is only one situation.

This forum is so supportive and I love it for that reason. I love the outpouring of support you are receiving right now. You deserve it. I hope that I am not hurting you with this question that I am posing. This is a very personal decision, but the decision to keep the pup will always hold the question, "am i willing to go through this very tragedy (or worse) again?" The only guarantee that it won't happen again is to place him in a home with no triggers.

I wish you the best. Your sweet girl will do just fine and be her old self in no time!
 
House Cat|1360075682|3372706 said:
I am so sorry. This is such a devastating event. I cried for you and your puppies. I rejoiced in seeing another dog healed with only one eye.

I am, however, confused as to why you are being encouraged to keep the dog situation as it is. I know this isn't an easy question right now, but why is everyone encouraging you to keep the pup? Shouldn't he be in a home with no other pets? I know everyone is saying accidents happen, but what if this isn't an accident? Personally, I wouldn't want to find out.

I have lived with a cocker spaniel who bit a person, his favorite person, and everyone thought it was a freak thing. Two months later, he bit her worse and scarred her for life. I know this is only one situation.

This forum is so supportive and I love it for that reason. I love the outpouring of support you are receiving right now. You deserve it. I hope that I am not hurting you with this question that I am posing. This is a very personal decision, but the decision to keep the pup will always hold the question, "am i willing to go through this very tragedy (or worse) again?" The only guarantee that it won't happen again is to place him in a home with no triggers.

I wish you the best. Your sweet girl will do just fine and be her old self in no time!

Hi, House Cat...your question is definitely a legitimate one and I am not upset by it. The trigger in this situation are toys. At this point, there i s nothing else that has caused problems. The triggers will be removed for quite some time. Pumbaa has a dog trainer that will be working with him following the NILIF method. I started trying the method last night and he is picking up on it very quickly. I have a lot of trust in my trainer. If I feel that Layla doesn't feel safe in my home or that Pumbaa isn't progressing, I will move to plan B.

Webdiva, wanna chime in? You are better at explaining.

Also, just want to point out that Layla has shallow eye cavities. This could have happened for many diff reasons not necessarily from him having bit her.
 
I am so sorry you're going through this! Please do not beat yourself up. They're DOGS. You can spend thousands on trainers, you can spend hours disciplining them, but you can't 100% prevent something like this from happening, because it was an ACCIDENT. I sincerely hope you keep the puppy, because I think you will find that they will grow to understand and tolerate each other during playtime. And you know what, tell your family whatever you need to to feel okay about it - it's really no one else's business and making you feel badly about what happened isn't going to solve anything. HUGS!!!
 
Autumnovember|1360077141|3372728 said:
Pumbaa has a dog trainer that will be working with him following the NILIF method. I started trying the method last night and he is picking up on it very quickly. I have a lot of trust in my trainer. If I feel that Layla doesn't feel safe in my home or that Pumbaa isn't progressing, I will move to plan B.

Also, just want to point out that Layla has shallow eye cavities. This could have happened for many diff reasons not necessarily from him having bit her.

Sounds really sensible, AN. What's the NLIF method?

One thing I advised when I did behavioral work, that might help, is to keep all toys up where they can't get them unless you give them. This does 2 things: stuff they might get territorial about isn't available, and it makes YOU (& DH) the Boss Dogs: "These toys are mine. I decide when you can borrow them." When you decide play time is over, put them back up. I give mine on opposite sides of the room -- your trainer should be able to show you when to re-direct attention, when one dog starts glancing over at the other's toy, sometimes makes a little walkabout toward it, like, "hey, just sniffing the rug over here...." Then you can head 'em off at the pass.

It helps especially with dominant breeds -- bulldogs love to just do their own thing (my Siberians take the cake on that!).

The point about shallow eye cavities is excellent & true -- terrific you realized it!

--- Laurie
 
She is being encouraged to keep the dog by experienced dog owners and handlers who understand what happened and why. We have also been in contact with AN off the board for more specific support and know she has an experienced trainer and that she and her husband are taking precautions while the training is going on. Bottom line, scuffles between dogs are common while they establish their relationship in the pack. This was a freak accident and the puppy is not aggressive. This has been verified by an experienced trainer in person.AN is learning what triggered it and how to avoid such interactions in the future.

Dogs don't just "lash out" for no reason. Both dogs likely exhibited body language to indicate that a fight was imminent. A dog that is uncomfortable with a situation will let you know. Here's a quick chart to explain some behaviors : http://www.prafulla.net/wp-content/sharenreadfiles/2012/04/245307/Understand-Dog-Language-Chart.jpg.. for example, a dog won't bite someone "out of the blue". Dogs have ways to let you know they are uncomfortable and those communications escalate as the dogs gets more and more uncomfortable. First with a growl or small baring of teeth. At this point, you need to remove your dog from the situation. If you don't, it will escalate to a bigger teeth baring. Then a snap in the air (bite in the air), then a bite closer to the object, animal or person making them uncomfortable, then a soft snap at the trigger, escalating into harder bites. They are protecting themselves and setting expectations with their trigger. If you tell a dog not to growl, you are training out that "symptom" and warning signal and the dog will progress to the next level. It's our job to train and desensitize our animals to triggers they are uncomfortable with through slow and steady desensitization training. Every city and very town has trainers. In addition, there are excellent videos available online from reputable trainers. Most of our training has been in the home, and it only takes a few minutes a day after the initial training. My point with all this is that undesirable behaviors can be handled or avoided through consistent training.

Dogs are animals, and understanding how they interact and learn best makes us all better pet parents. Unfortunately, sometimes we learn this after a "crisis" situation. We cannot assign human emotions or behavior expectations on them, and we need to train them on how we want them to behave within the context of this animal behavior. I control all the food, attention, affection and access to fun activities in my household - so my dogs know that I'm the boss and behaving in a manner I have taught them will get them those resources. We need to teach them both dog manners if they didn't learn from their mom(how to get along with other dogs) and good manners around humans (no jumping, licking, etc). It's our responsibility as pet parents to set them up for success through this training. AN is doing this now.

My dogs had similar interactions when we brought our second dog into our home, however we understood what was happening and also we thankfully didn't have any freak accidents - just smaller wounds. Someone not understanding the situation would think my older dog was "aggressive", however he's a pussy cat that was establishing a relationship with another very bossy dog. He is a well behaved dog otherwise and we are now a certified therapy dog team, working mainly with small children to increase their reading levels.
 
JewelFreak|1360080979|3372778 said:
Autumnovember|1360077141|3372728 said:
Pumbaa has a dog trainer that will be working with him following the NILIF method. I started trying the method last night and he is picking up on it very quickly. I have a lot of trust in my trainer. If I feel that Layla doesn't feel safe in my home or that Pumbaa isn't progressing, I will move to plan B.

Also, just want to point out that Layla has shallow eye cavities. This could have happened for many diff reasons not necessarily from him having bit her.

Sounds really sensible, AN. What's the NLIF method?

One thing I advised when I did behavioral work, that might help, is to keep all toys up where they can't get them unless you give them. This does 2 things: stuff they might get territorial about isn't available, and it makes YOU (& DH) the Boss Dogs: "These toys are mine. I decide when you can borrow them." When you decide play time is over, put them back up. I give mine on opposite sides of the room -- your trainer should be able to show you when to re-direct attention, when one dog starts glancing over at the other's toy, sometimes makes a little walkabout toward it, like, "hey, just sniffing the rug over here...." Then you can head 'em off at the pass.

It helps especially with dominant breeds -- bulldogs love to just do their own thing (my Siberians take the cake on that!).

The point about shallow eye cavities is excellent & true -- terrific you realized it!

--- Laurie


Laurie, NILIF is exactly what you describe - nothing is life is free. Everything beings to the owner and I dispense resources after they have worked for it. They have to earn toys by behaving and not stealing each others toys, otherwise they all get taken away.

Super bossy siberians here, too! :)
 
Oh, I get it! Sounds like just the thing. Thanks!

I don't think there's another kind of Siberian except super bossy! 8-) That's why I love them -- constant challenge. If you don't learn to speak Wolf, you'll never get anywhere with a Siberian, lol.

--- Laurie
 
Hi :wavey:

Thank you all again for the support and words of comfort, it has really helped me a lot through this especially since I still have not told my parents. I plan on telling them on Friday. I didn't want my dad going to work this whole week feeling terribly and not concentrating on work. Telling them on Friday will give them a couple days to let it digest.

I wanted to let you all know that Layla had her surgery this afternoon and it went well.

She will be coming home with me tonight around 6 or 7 PM.

I'm definitely nervous. For many reasons but I will remain calm and strong for both dogs sakes.

I will come back and write again after she is picked up. I imagine she will be doing lots of sleeping on my bed for the next week.

Thank you all again - keep the prayers up. I can feel them.
 
AN, so sorry to hear about what happened to Layla, but glad to hear she made it thru her surgery so well. Please keep us updated with her progress. I know she'll do just fine with one eye- I agree that dogs are very resilient!!
It's so hard on us when our beloved pets are injured or ill. I will send lots of good thoughts your way for Layla's speedy recovery.
 
When we brought home our lab puppy our 2 year old springer decided out of the blue to go after her. No warning. (Our 3 year old springer never flinched with the new puppy-loved her from day one).The poor lab puppy ended up with 25 or 30 stitches in her face. I felt AWFUL. I was a nervous wreck bringing the lab puppy home from the vet. We were VERY careful when we reunited them and NEVER left them alone unattended -literally for a year or two. If we weren't home, they were crated. I kept a spray bottle of water with me and if there was EVEN a hint of a lip, snarl, even the "look" the springer got sprayed. I also used my voice to call her off (loudly I will admit). The lab was really funny though-she caught on and anytime she even SAW that springer come into the room she was in she would yelp like the dickens!!!! We all would immediatly bolt, yell at the springer and soak her! After the first few weeks we realized what the lab was up to and we had a good laugh. They made detante and were all the better dogs because of it. The springer was never a warm fuzzy dog to puppies after that but she never went after anyone else. She would stare at the ceiling (no joke) if a puppy came to visit and just refuse to look at it. Period. Literally until the day she died. My lab is 14+ years now and they were good buddies after we worked out the kinks. I will say I was always very cautios when I introduced a new dog to the house while the springer was alive or if a dog came for an extended visit. It made me a better dog owner in the long run. I need to add that I worked with a dog trainer who knew my multidog home as well as the dogs and I totally subscribed to the NILIF system. I frequently used a crate with this dog when I felt she was insecure and needed her safe place. I also never kept toys that were "flash points" between the dogs-ie marrow bones.
 
mjr1|1360101585|3373047 said:
When we brought home our lab puppy our 2 year old springer decided out of the blue to go after her. No warning. (Our 3 year old springer never flinched with the new puppy-loved her from day one).The poor lab puppy ended up with 25 or 30 stitches in her face. I felt AWFUL. I was a nervous wreck bringing the lab puppy home from the vet. We were VERY careful when we reunited them and NEVER left them alone unattended -literally for a year or two. If we weren't home, they were crated. I kept a spray bottle of water with me and if there was EVEN a hint of a lip, snarl, even the "look" the springer got sprayed. I also used my voice to call her off (loudly I will admit). The lab was really funny though-she caught on and anytime she even SAW that springer come into the room she was in she would yelp like the dickens!!!! We all would immediatly bolt, yell at the springer and soak her! After the first few weeks we realized what the lab was up to and we had a good laugh. They made detante and were all the better dogs because of it. The springer was never a warm fuzzy dog to puppies after that but she never went after anyone else. She would stare at the ceiling (no joke) if a puppy came to visit and just refuse to look at it. Period. Literally until the day she died. My lab is 14+ years now and they were good buddies after we worked out the kinks. I will say I was always very cautios when I introduced a new dog to the house while the springer was alive or if a dog came for an extended visit. It made me a better dog owner in the long run. I need to add that I worked with a dog trainer who knew my multidog home as well as the dogs and I totally subscribed to the NILIF system. I frequently used a crate with this dog when I felt she was insecure and needed her safe place. I also never kept toys that were "flash points" between the dogs-ie marrow bones.
Thsnk you so much for sharing your story!!!

Are there any specific suggestions you can give me for when I bring her home tonight?
 
I'm so sorry you and your pups are going through this! Wanted to recommend you check out a blog called "Ramshackle Glam" & look up her posts about when one of her pets lost an eye. He's perfectly fine now & just looks "winky" and adorable.

I know you were hoping for the prosthesis but gosh - if I was the pup - I wouldn't want some round rock in my head that didn't do any good! Never seen one of those in action so - have no idea whether it would actually even "fool" you (or your parents) yanno?

My gut says you should level with your parents no matter how difficult & judgy they are. It's too hard to keep up lies. In the long run.

Anyway - good luck with everything. It will be an adjustment but your pup will just be so happy to be home & with you guys again. Pamper away!
 
Autumnovember|1360102805|3373057 said:
mjr1|1360101585|3373047 said:
When we brought home our lab puppy our 2 year old springer decided out of the blue to go after her. No warning. (Our 3 year old springer never flinched with the new puppy-loved her from day one).The poor lab puppy ended up with 25 or 30 stitches in her face. I felt AWFUL. I was a nervous wreck bringing the lab puppy home from the vet. We were VERY careful when we reunited them and NEVER left them alone unattended -literally for a year or two. If we weren't home, they were crated. I kept a spray bottle of water with me and if there was EVEN a hint of a lip, snarl, even the "look" the springer got sprayed. I also used my voice to call her off (loudly I will admit). The lab was really funny though-she caught on and anytime she even SAW that springer come into the room she was in she would yelp like the dickens!!!! We all would immediatly bolt, yell at the springer and soak her! After the first few weeks we realized what the lab was up to and we had a good laugh. They made detante and were all the better dogs because of it. The springer was never a warm fuzzy dog to puppies after that but she never went after anyone else. She would stare at the ceiling (no joke) if a puppy came to visit and just refuse to look at it. Period. Literally until the day she died. My lab is 14+ years now and they were good buddies after we worked out the kinks. I will say I was always very cautios when I introduced a new dog to the house while the springer was alive or if a dog came for an extended visit. It made me a better dog owner in the long run. I need to add that I worked with a dog trainer who knew my multidog home as well as the dogs and I totally subscribed to the NILIF system. I frequently used a crate with this dog when I felt she was insecure and needed her safe place. I also never kept toys that were "flash points" between the dogs-ie marrow bones.
Thsnk you so much for sharing your story!!!

Are there any specific suggestions you can give me for when I bring her home tonight?

Yes! Forgot about the water spray bottle, we used it too. It works best if they don't see you spraying it (ninja style)!

For when you bring her home:

We made sure that our pup had a safe, soft bed to sleep on after we brought him home from surgery, and made sure his canine sister didn't bother him or lick his wound. We also had a super yummy wet food that we made available to him in small amounts, and had a syringe without a needle ready in case she was too weak to drink (we shot water into his mouth).

She may be nauseous from the anesthesia or pills. You can rub sugar water or honey on her gums to keep her blood sugar up if she doesn't eat for more than 12 hours. If you need her to take pills and can't get her to eat/swallow - throw the pill in the back of her throat, close her muzzle and blow into her nose while massaging her throat - it'll force her to swallow the pill. I slept beside him on the sofa the first few nights to monitor him and let him out to pee. The first poop might be difficult or not come for a few days, so buy some canned pureed pumpkin (without spices) to add fiber to her diet and make her poop easier. She'll probably just be sleepy for a while, so keep her in a quiet spot and let her sleep it off.

Get a 24/7 phone number from the vet to call in case you see anything "off", or locate the nearest emergency clinic. This is just in case, but you want to do this now since you'll won't have time if she gets sick and you're upset. I also research all the meds my dog is taking, since the vet may not mention all of the side effects and I want to be aware of anything to look out for. One of the meds made him super nauseous, so we had to go back for anti-nausea meds (which were $10/pill!!!).

Speaking of cost, definitely look into signing both pups up for pet insurance - it's so worth it! We pay $35/month per dog and we've gotten back over $7500 so far in the past two months. Too late for this surgery, but it comes in handy in any other emergencies and illnesses.

Most of all, stay calm and positive - she will look to you for guidance. If you're calm, she'll stay calm. :) Let us know how it goes!
 
I think you've been getting excellent advice on the dog front. And I am SO GLAD she came through surgery well.

But I'm not sure you're getting good advice on the parent front.

I agree that "honesty is the best policy," in general. But that's not true in relationships with people with boundary issues that you don't feel comfortable detaching from.

The only reason I'm saying this is that, well, your family sounds culturally similar to mine ... and most of my friends from the same culture have had similar emotional trajectories. I started typing out examples, but after looking at it for a sec, thought it would be massively derailing - happy to provide them if you want, but I'll tl:dr it down to this: some people express affection by Fixing Things For You. When you already know how you want to handle those things, and are a competent adult, and yet have a sufficiently close relationship that it's not an option to ignore them until they cool down and let you do things your way, it can be more trouble than it's worth to give them ammo.

Whatever you do, stay firm in the knowledge that this was a terrible accident, that you are doing the best you can, and that you deserve sympathy and support, not judgement.
 
As a mom to 4 cats (who are my babies, through and through), I am feeling so bad for you. I'll be thinking of you and keeping you and your furry ones in my prayers!
 
I'm so sorry this happened AN. I dont know much about dogs but the few one-eyed dogs I've seen didnt even act like they
knew they were missing anything. I'm sure your pup is ready to be back home with you getting some much needed love and
attention. Please dont be hard on yourself. Sometimes we can be our own worse enemy. It doesnt do you or Layla any good so
try not to go there. You have had a good cry (several I'm sure) so try to put all your effort into something positive like getting
the new puppy trained. Hope all goes well with Layla's recovery.
 
House Cat|1360075682|3372706 said:
I am so sorry. This is such a devastating event. I cried for you and your puppies. I rejoiced in seeing another dog healed with only one eye.

I am, however, confused as to why you are being encouraged to keep the dog situation as it is. I know this isn't an easy question right now, but why is everyone encouraging you to keep the pup? Shouldn't he be in a home with no other pets? I know everyone is saying accidents happen, but what if this isn't an accident? Personally, I wouldn't want to find out.

I have lived with a cocker spaniel who bit a person, his favorite person, and everyone thought it was a freak thing. Two months later, he bit her worse and scarred her for life. I know this is only one situation.

This forum is so supportive and I love it for that reason. I love the outpouring of support you are receiving right now. You deserve it. I hope that I am not hurting you with this question that I am posing. This is a very personal decision, but the decision to keep the pup will always hold the question, "am i willing to go through this very tragedy (or worse) again?" The only guarantee that it won't happen again is to place him in a home with no triggers.

I wish you the best. Your sweet girl will do just fine and be her old self in no time!

I agree with you, House Cat.

Plus my other concern is that you AN and your husband are not always home 24/7, right? You can only supervise things while you're home. Hopefully they never do, but what if they go at it over a toy again when you're not at home? I would be so worried for them both.
 
Laila619|1360106867|3373102 said:
House Cat|1360075682|3372706 said:
I am so sorry. This is such a devastating event. I cried for you and your puppies. I rejoiced in seeing another dog healed with only one eye.

I am, however, confused as to why you are being encouraged to keep the dog situation as it is. I know this isn't an easy question right now, but why is everyone encouraging you to keep the pup? Shouldn't he be in a home with no other pets? I know everyone is saying accidents happen, but what if this isn't an accident? Personally, I wouldn't want to find out.

I have lived with a cocker spaniel who bit a person, his favorite person, and everyone thought it was a freak thing. Two months later, he bit her worse and scarred her for life. I know this is only one situation.

This forum is so supportive and I love it for that reason. I love the outpouring of support you are receiving right now. You deserve it. I hope that I am not hurting you with this question that I am posing. This is a very personal decision, but the decision to keep the pup will always hold the question, "am i willing to go through this very tragedy (or worse) again?" The only guarantee that it won't happen again is to place him in a home with no triggers.

I wish you the best. Your sweet girl will do just fine and be her old self in no time!

I agree with you, House Cat.

Plus my other concern is that you AN and your husband are not always home 24/7, right? You can only supervise things while you're home. Hopefully they never do, but what if they go at it over a toy again when you're not at home? I would be so worried for them both.

AN mentioned that they will not be left unsupervised. She also mentioned that she won't be leaving toys around.
 
I'm sure AN will separate them or crate somebody when she's not home.

Good advice, Circe, perceptive & well put, good support for AN when she talks to her parents.

We've had 2 dogs almost always & sometimes 3, plus cats at the same time. Introducing new dogs goes a little more smoothly if they meet the 1st time on neutral ground, like the street or a park & get the sniffing & circling part done without the resident dog's feeling like defending territory. It helps if they can get acquainted for a short time before going into the house.

There are always rumbles, as others have said. Once you know the body language you can mostly see it coming & stop it before war erupts. Always, even in small dust-ups, I make sure both dogs know it's MY pack and I don't allow ANY fighting, ever. (Ditto chomping on cats.)

I've taken all of them in for stitches at least once in 25 yrs, only one time fairly major. Dogs can't discuss disagreements; these incidents are often their way of "saying" it. It is a normal part of dog-hood, but our job is to keep them safe & happy & aware of their place in the pack.

Sounds like the pup has great teaching & a loving home. He has no idea Layla is so much smaller & more delicate than he is -- he has only played with his littermates till now. He's in good hands to learn & I'll bet they end up good buds.

--- Laurie
 
AN-when we came home from the vet I made sure the springer was in her crate until I got the puppy settled. This was not punishment as she liked her crate. All toys were away and I was clearly in charge. Nothing started or stoppped without my direction. I fed the puppy first and the springers last. I put the toys out, I put them away. I ran the play time. I handed out the treats. I decided when it was bed time. It was very clear who was the alpha. The springer NEVER went after the puppy again. BUT we were diligent. The humans were clearly on alert and we didn't let down our guard. The dogs were aware of it, but we let them figure out how to make it work. The water spray was honestly the best thing. I also used a pie plate as a deterent. If I needed to stop something before it started I would beat the tin pan with my hand or on the counter. They didn't lke the noise. What they didn't get was I used that if I couldn't reach them with the water spray. It caught their attention and diffused the situation and changed their focus. To this day I can change a behaviour with the phrase "I''ll get pan". Honestly, the lab was wary of the springer, she quickly figured out if she felt threatened all she had to do was whimper and we reacted. That gave her comfort and she quickly became self assured. They both had no long term residuals to my best assessment. The springer died at 12 years of age (cancer) and the lab is alive and well. She is the best dog ever. It really didn't take long for them to work it out, it took me longer to relax. Just remember-you are the boss. You run the show-you set the tone. Calm, cool and in charge. Love on them, cuddle them, let them know you are their for them but you won't tolerate any agression. Stop it before it starts. Just be alert and supervise them as they make their own way. Really, I believe they will work it out. Good luck!
 
I just read your story and it brought tears to my eyes. what a horrible situation fro everyone involved! You cannot blame yourself or the pup. No one could have predicted that something this specific could have happened and from what i read the pup trod on your dogs jugular? thats just a freak accident. could happen with any breed and any age.

I hope your little one recovers well. I would say do not feel pressured to give away or keep your pup based on what other people say. You need to do what you need to do.
 
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