Wedding Venue nightmare update...

[Pandora II]

So...

My father sent the witch a letter setting out his position and saying how much stress this was causing my mother at a time she was undergoing major surgery and radiotheraphy and that we had picked the venue so as to make it easy on her.

He also set out about the wine issue and how she had agreed to our supplying all the wine and at a lower price than she was now quoting.

He said he wanted the computers and crap cleared out of the reception room, and that we didn''t want another evening meal as we had no extra guests coming.

We got a reply back yesterday. Lets just say it was about a centimetre on the right side of ''rude''. No apology for making things difficult, no mention of my mother''s situation...

She has agreed to move the computers and crap - yay! But...wait for it... only if we pay $100.

WTF!!!

We are already paying $6k just for hire of the venue - so my father is even angrier than before!

She is refusing to give in on anything else and inventing whole new scenarios for why she can''t give in.


My father has written a new letter and the reply to that should, fingers crossed, hang her with her own rope. We''ve also spoken to a whole load of other people who loathe her for pretty much the same reasons.

I also contacted a local councillor in her area who is from the same political party as me and who had written some ''interesting'' things in a newspaper about her and her previous job. So I gave him a call to discuss the reasons for her employment ending - which are all rather mysterious - but he basically confirmed what I was thinking and it seems that she behaves in the same bullying manner in every job and no-one likes her because of it.

So, the ammunition stockpile is growing healthier by the day.

Can I have some PS fairy dust for the response to the letter being what I''m hoping for!

 

[Harriet]

Good luck!

 

[mimzy]

ooohh good luck pandora! i really hope that your dad''s latest letter really sets her straight (gotta love dads! not that we aren''t capable...but you know

). what bad luck that this lady ended up being hired at your venue

. hopefully it will be smooth sailing the rest of the way.

 

[Gypsy]

Lots of Fairy Dust your way. She sounds like my boss. Ugh! I''m sorry you have to deal with her Pandora. I hope she gets what she''s got coming to her. Big time.

 

[Pandora II]

I think she needs to start brushing up her resume - if things go to plan she''ll need it!

 

[sera]

It''s hard to believe people really behave like this. I realllllly hope everything goes perfectly with your venue, but dang, what a bunch of stress nobody needs even if it does end up well. People... like would be sooo much easier without them.

 

[doodle]

i have a plan--let''s take your venue witch, my venue witch, and gypsy''s boss, put all of them in a canoe together, and deposit them somewhere off the coast of australia--lots of poisonous things in that area from what i hear. we''ll let them fight to the death in a boat in the ocean, meanwhile letting fellow PSers place bets on who the victor will be. the "owner" of the evil survivor has to buy the first round of drinks for the rest of us.

i don''t know about you, but i think i''m BRILLIANT.

 

[bee*]

I can''t believe that she wants you to pay for moving the computers and that she won''t give in about anything else

What a cow! Best of luck with the next letter!

 

[Pandora II]

Next update...

I've now had a reply to my father's second letter.

The phrase I was hoping to be in there was - so she is done for hook, line and sinker. The sentence constitutes fraud and is therefore a criminal offense. Yay!

She has also caved on the corkage and the second meal - but not to the extent that I want.

My parents found out the other day that another very close friend of theirs is also VERY closely involved with the venue and can't satnd this woman. So that is two VERY, VERY senior people who are on our side. My parents are getting phonecalls daily from other people to see how things are going and they are backing us too (and also have connections with the venue).

I'm still fighting on 3 points - which I am likely to win on as well.

My main ambition now is to get rid of her.

The really freaky thing is I had this dream that she got sacked and then turned up on the day and threw a bucket of red paint over me just before my father and I entered to go down the aisle.

My father rang me the next day to say did I have some kind of security protection from FI's team because he had had a dream that night that she turned up and threw a bottle of red ink over me!

How weird is that!

 

[lliang_chi]

Doodle, I love your idea of "Evil Witch Survivor". But I think the "owner" of the survivor should get drinks paid for her, since her evil witch didn''t die. A part of me feels bad for saying things like that, but c''mon they''re just plain nasty!

Pandora, I''m keeping my fingers crossed for you! She sounds TERRIBLE, but it seems like you''ve got a lot of super leverage on her. I hope she drops out of the picture before your big day. And yes, VERY weird thing with the dream. It probably has to do with this woman causing you and your dad so much stress. Not that she''s going to stain you on your big day. But still, you should pass out mug shots of her during your wedding and say, "If you see this woman, please have her removed from the premesis." Ha ha.

 

[Stephanie]

Well, I think that your ambition is about to pay off - or at least it should with fraud and all. Keep fighting for what you want!

Those dreams would freak me out - especially with someone else having one so similar.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Dust for you!!

 

[Gypsy]

Can I ask what sentence is in the letter that has you so giddy???

Sending lots of dust your way! DOWN WITH THE EVIL WITCHES.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 4/30/2008 1:11:31 PM
Author: Gypsy
Can I ask what sentence is in the letter that has you so giddy???

Sending lots of dust your way! DOWN WITH THE EVIL WITCHES.

She told me at our meeting that:

'due to the terms of our Premise's License they would be unable to serve alcohol in the evening without substantial food, so you have a choice: pay for another meal or no alcohol' - so I asked to see a copy of her license at which point she turned round and ignored me and started talking to my mother about something else.

Being a Councillor for my London Borough I have had considerable training in the Licensing Act 2003, and I used to sit on the panel who award licenses, so I have a fair idea of what the rules are.

When I got back to London I called the Head of Licensing and also spoke to their legal team. They said that I was right and there was no such legal obligation, BUT she might have something in her license as a special clause.

So I rang her local Council and spoke to the Head of Licensing there and did the "This is Councillor Pandora from the London Borough of X calling on behalf of my constituent... could you possibly email me a copy of the Premises License for venue X please'

Which they did - no such clause in there at all!.

I then got a last minute call the very same day from a very close friend who is coming to the wedding inviting me to take someone's place at the Annual Dinner of the Licensing Committee of the Corporation of the City of London which was on that night. He just happens to be extremely high-up on that committee and is also a JP, so I got his advice as well.

He agreed that there was nothing of the sort in the Act and even if there had been, a wedding was one seamless event and so the fact that we had served a meal earlier would more than fulfill any such obligation. He also offered any help I needed for free, including the services of one of the top QC's in London!

As she would stand to gain financially through the misrepresentation of the terms of her license, it is technically fraud. Not only that, but if we are supplying the alcohol ourselves they don't even need a Premises License. Misrepresentation of the terms of your License is also a criminal offense.

However I only had a verbal declaration - and I needed it in writing. Which I got today - hooray!

It's something a lot of people probably wouldn't spot - the Licensing Act 2003 is pretty boring reading!

I always google people I am working with, mainly out of sheer nosiness, but also just so I know who I am dealing with. She has been VERY silly not to check what I do for a living. I have a variety of job titles and just gave her my Events Manager business card.

Parents are off to start the ball rolling with these other people.

 

[gwendolyn]

Wow, that woman should start packing! I am glad you have had the knowledge to catch her at this, but it makes me sad for the people before you that she''s probably screwed over who didn''t realize it. Can you request to deal with someone other than her, citing the problems you''ve had and the fact that she''s going to be under investigation for fraud?

 

[FrekeChild]

This is sounding more and more exciting by the minute!

Get her Pandora!! And Pandora''s flunkies!

 

[Stephanie]

Date: 4/30/2008 1:40:12 PM
Author: FrekeChild
This is sounding more and more exciting by the minute!

Get her Pandora!! And Pandora''s flunkies!

I know! It''s like a drama unfolding before us. I can barely wait to see what happens next.

 

[Selkie]

Ding dong, the witch is dead...soon, at least.

 

[ringster]

woa, that woman messed with THE wrong bride! just think what a service you are doing for future brides - hopefully they won''t have to deal with her weasely ways thanks to you and your dad.

go girl!

 

[doodle]

i know this must be absolutely horrible for you and your family having to take on so much stress, but i have to admit that watching you bust the lady is waaay too much fun, so you get ''em, tiger! if there''s anyone above her, i would think that just the mere mention of their business looking bad if it came out that she had broken the law trying to fraud you would be enough for them to fire her immediately! as for the dream thing, i come from a family that puts a lot of faith in those because many of the women in my family, including my mother and myself, often have dreams that come true down to the very last detail, so if you and your dad both had a dream that specific and that similar, i''d trust it and have some wedding security--it could be silly or it could save you from looking like the lobster bride! my cousin had an ex boyfriend that had been stalking her from the time they broke up several years ago until the weekend before her wedding, so at her ceremony, we locked every single door leading into the sanctuary with the exception of one. that one door was guarded by the wedding planner and about 4 ushers--she wasn''t taking any chances! i wish you all the best, and i can''t wait to see you post something along the lines of "ding dong, the witch is gone!" perhaps someone should remind her that, back in the day, people like her were burned at the stake! ...or you could just send her a broom with a note reading, "to aid you in your departure"

 

[Gypsy]

I remember you mentioned the license and her misrepresentation of it before... I was hoping that''s what you got in writing! That''s great news. I don''t normally root for people losing their positions, but since she IS breaking the law, I can''t say that I''m sorry if she does. She just a vicious bully and she''s going to get her just punishment. And our Pandora is going to have a lovely PERFECT wedding.

 

[sumbride]

I love this! The triumph of good over evil! Go get her Pandora!

 

[zoebartlett]

Wow! Good for you for following through with all of this and standing up to her. I can''t wait to see what happens next. Best wishes!!

 

[bee*]

Oh wow! Sounds like she''s on her way out!

 

[Pandora II]

My Dad just called...

The lady he spoke to is very high up on the governing board and a good friend of my parents - my father and her husband both worked as consultants in the same hospital dept.

Apparently there were some parents looking round the place (it's a private school) last week to see if they wanted to send their children there and she bumped into them and stopped to chat. They mentioned thay hadn't been able to see the library - so she says no problem, I'll take you to have a look.

There was going to be a event on that evening so the library was set up for dinner. The witch locked the door and refused to let this lady have the key and was very rude to her in front of the parents.

She is fuming!

In the UK, the school governors have the ultimate hire/fire power (FI and I are both school governors for schools here in London) so it is not a good idea to 'upset' them.

She totally agrees with my father that the witch is being outrageous - my father also made it very clear that he doesn't want her there on the day - and has told him to leave everything to her and she's going to go in and sort things both for us and for her.

I think marching orders might be on the way.

PS fairy dust much needed!


On the dream thing, I have often had dreams that are a bit freaky - but the opposite always happens.

My brother who is 6ft 6" has offered to be body-guard just in case!

I have asked my parents to pay someone to house-sit for the evening at their home - which is a sensible precaution anyway as a lot of burglars strike during weddings as they know you'll be out all day. I just don't want to run any risks.

Gwendolyn - sadly there is no-one but her, otherwise I'd have done that from the start.

I'm just praying (in a atheistic kind of way

) that they don't just give her a talking to - just looking at her makes me feel ill. I am such a wuss!

 

[Gypsy]

SENDING MUCH DUST!

 

[buttercup80]

Note to self: Don''t do anything to piss off pandora!


I''m glad things seem to be working themselves out - best of luck! I hope that woman gets what she deserves!

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 4/30/2008 5:05:29 PM
Author: buttercup80
Note to self: Don't do anything to piss off pandora!


I'm glad things seem to be working themselves out - best of luck! I hope that woman gets what she deserves!

LOL. Trust me, the only person I know who is more conflict avoidant than me is my line manager! I have to be MEGA pissed off to do anything like this - but once I start I don't normally let go.

Although, thinking about it, a company in Italy tried to pull a fast one on me once - I hired a rottweiler of a lawyer from the 'Communist Truck-Drivers Union' of all places

. It cost them a fortune in legal fees - mine and theirs!

My father and I are nervous wrecks at the moment though - I was shaking opening the envelope this morning, and my mother told me my dad was when my fax started coming through.

We're both sleeping badly - and my giving up cigarettes has so not happened!

 

[Gypsy]

Oh honey. Please please listen to me.


You are marrying the love of your life. Even if a freak tornado blows through the middle of the library in the middle of your reception, nothing will change the enormity and wonder of that. As long as everyone is healthy everything WILL be alright. So please, keep things in perspective, DO NOT let someone so miserable and unworthy affect your health and impact your life in such an a a way. She's not worth it. And even if you DO get her removed (by whatever legal means possible), IF you are a mess about it she STILL WILL HAVE WON. So, please don't let her win. Please.

I KNOW this is easier said than done. I REALLY DO because I work with a witch every freaking day of the week. But, please do try to the extent that you can to remain calm and picture yourself in your mind's eye your FI's face as he sees you walking toward him, wearing that gorgeous bespoke gown, ready to pledge your life and love to him.

 

[surfgirl]

Witchy event coordinator, please bring me your torch. The tribe has spoken...